- Our mind-reading or ‘thought-reading’ derives from observing:
- eyes
- facial expressions
- gestures
- posture
- vocal characteristics.
- Be aware of the 3 Cs at all times:
- context
- congruence
- clusters.
- Warning: ID 10T error.
Observance of the 3 Cs is the key to your ‘mind-reading’. Misinterpret and you’ll be committing what’s known (by me!)as the classic ID 10T error. - Remember the 55, 38, 7 rule.
- Be aware of your own and other people’s body language by looking for:
- displacement activities
- self-comfort gestures.
- The key – when analysing body language – is always to look out for behaviour that indicates if a person is experiencing comfort or discomfort.
- Every thought produces a body reaction.
Coffee break …
Your likeability determines your success in both your personal and professional life.
The secret of likeability is: how you make others feel.
Research shows that if you make others feel good about themselves, through eye contact and paying attention, you are perceived as attractive.
First impressions are important so it is no surprise that the first thing a person judges you on is your appearance.
The smile comes out very high as a common denominator in the likeability stakes because it evokes a reciprocal response from the other person.
Listening scores very highly in promoting likeability: women tend to be more animated when talking with each other and therefore tend to establish rapport quicker than men.
Women tend to listen with the whole body, showing visual clues and promoting more empathy.
Men tend to show fewer visual clues that give evidence of listening, so when a woman comes across a good male listener she’s usually ‘bowled over’!
Like listening, good eye contact is a winner, but also expression in the eyes comes over as influential in the likeability equation.
Voice plays a big part too: if your pitch, tone and loudness are ‘in sync’ with their liking, you gain deeper rapport with the person.
The biggest influence in your likeability ‘quotient’? Why, your body language of course.