Appendix B

Practices

Practices naturally follow self-observation. A practice is a behavior that we do again and again with the intention of improving a quality or competence. In order to improve, we must be able to observe whether or not we are doing the behavior competently and correct accordingly. Self-observation then becomes part of every practice that we do. Here are examples of practices that clients have taken on over the years. A practice fades into the background when a person has done it enough times to be able to competently perform the action effortlessly and seamlessly. For example, many of us have practiced making right-hand turns, but probably none of us practices making right-hand turns on our way to work. We’ve practiced enough so that we can effortlessly turn right and the action is part of a seamless flow of driving. As you read through the following examples, remember that that is the intention of each practice. As in the self-observation appendix, the categories presented will be business, relationship, and personal. Feel free to use them as you like with yourself or your clients.

Practice Sample 1: Business

Objective

Establish and maintain management practices that leave you with more free time and less stress.

Recommended Actions

I urge you to begin these at once. It will take a while to have them become habits and for people to take your new actions seriously. Be patient and consistent.

Part I: Scheduling Your Time

Meetings and Appointments

1. Each Friday go over your schedule for the upcoming week with your assistant.
2. Tell your assistant at what other times you are available to meet with people.  Be sure to keep 50 percent of your time inviolate to cover the rest of your job (see below).
3. Tell your assistant who you’re expecting to schedule time with and how much time to allot for the meeting.
4. Ask your assistant to schedule no one else without your approval. They get your approval by giving you a list of requestees each day.
5. After you approve a meeting, have your assistant call back the requestee to firm up the meeting.
6. Have your assistant call the day before all scheduled meetings and appointments to confirm.

Part II: How Much of What

1. Schedule a maximum amount of time you’ll work each week. Deal with breakdowns by canceling activities instead of adding hours, so that you can stay within your maximum time allotment.
2. Keep working your schedule to bring it to the following proportions:

   15% Planning

   15% Administrative activities

   50% Appointments and meetings

   20% Addressing breakdowns

Analyze your time each week and keep correcting the schedule.

Part III: Communication

1. Stay on top of major milestones in projects only and deal only with breakdowns that stop people dead in the water. Give all other breakdowns back quickly.
2. Stop the flow of “F.Y.I.” information to you in priority form (e.g., send back voice mail that has that content (“F.Y.I.”) with a message saying that you’ll only accept such reports via electronic mail or memo). Use priority forms of communication, such as voice mail, one-on-one meetings, and staff meetings, only for communication of high priority.
3. Stop being a conduit for ordinary communication flow. Link people together and let them work it out.

Part IV: Miscellaneous (but Important)

Bring your lunch to work. That way you can have healthy food on hand and not be subject to whatever the vending machines provide.

Practice Sample 2: Business

Objective

To further your subordinates’ career development plans.

Directions

Meet with each of your subordinates quarterly.

Background

Initiating and supporting career development plans for your subordinates is an important part of your managerial responsibilities. Your role is to provide feedback about performance, to suggest the next developmental step for them, and to assign work to support that development (see Figure B.1).

FIGURE B.1 Developmental Plans

Preparing

1. What are the three main strengths of this person? Cite three examples.
2. What is the current greatest performance issue with this person? Cite three examples.
3. What type of assignment would most strengthen this person?

Follow-Up

Observe progress and correct your plan accordingly. Keep up with follow-up dates.

Practice Sample 3: Business

Assignment Management Form

The purpose of this form (see Figure B.2) is to facilitate supervision and monitoring of the work of your subordinates. Make photocopies and label each form with the name of an individual who works for you. Fill in and update the information in the columns during your weekly meetings with your subordinates.

FIGURE B.2 Assignment Management Form

You can also use the form as a reference when information is requested of you and when you are assigning work. Be diligent and rigorous in filling out the form and in following up.

Practice Sample 4: Business

Issue Inventory Form

Use this form (see Figure B.3) for support in planning, recording, and learning from your speaking up about important issues at work.

FIGURE B.3 Issue Inventory Form

Take some time each week (15–20 minutes) and scan through events, conversations, meetings, and your reading at work. Pick out the issues that seem most important to you, your boss, peers, or subordinates. Then fill in the first and second column of the form. As your thinking around the issues clarifies, fill in the next two columns. Use the last column as a place to record what happened so that you can keep improving this process for yourself.

Practice Sample 5: Business

Objective

Establish and maintain management practices that enable you to identify your priorities and manage your time more effectively.

Directions

1. List all of the activities that you actually do at work.
   1. Divide them into categories A, B, and C, with A being the most important for the success of the business and C being the least important.
   2. Within each category number the activities, with #1 being the most vital.
   3. Write next to each activity how much time you spend doing it each week or, in some cases, each month.
2. Then ask yourself:
   1. Can I allocate my time more effectively? How?
   2. What activities can I give to someone else?
   3. What is my job at the company, really?
3. List all of the activities you wish you were doing at work but that you never get around to doing. Be exhaustive in your listing.
   1. Divide the activities into categories and prioritize them as above.
   2. Write next to each activity how much time each week/month it would take you to complete.
4. Then ask yourself:
   1. What would be the benefit of doing this activity?
   2. What recurring breakdowns could I avoid by doing this activity?
   3. What is my job at this company, really?
5. Have your staff do #1, #2, #3, and #4. Then, having shared what you wrote and having read their responses, ask them for ways to reorganize, redesign your department’s work systems, accountability, management systems, reward systems, training, and development of staff.
6. What did you learn by doing this?

Practice Sample 1: Relationship

Dating Debriefing Exercise

Use this exercise for support in your goal to establish a lasting romantic relationship with someone.

Instructions

After going out on a date, answer the following questions:

1. What did we do on the date? How do I feel about that?
2. How do I feel about the person?
3. How do I feel about myself around the person?
4. How open am I to the person?
5. What judgments/opinions/assessments have I made about the person? Based on what?
6. What do I feel this person wants from me? What am I open to providing?
7. What support will I provide for this person?
8. What future will I bring about with this person?
9. Anything else about this date that I should consider?

Practice Sample 2: Relationship

At the beginning of each day, list the actions that you will take in each domain listed below. At day’s end, notice what you actually accomplished, what you learned, and what corrections to make.

1. Supporting my partner
2. Sharing my life with my partner
3. Making myself open and available to my partner
4. Having fun with my partner
5. Forwarding our life together

Practice Sample 1: Personal

Sitting

• Sitting is a practice in observation, in acceptance, in compassion, in stillness, in discovering our true nature.
• Sitting is simple and, because of that, can be difficult to do.
• It is impossible to do wrong—if done with sincerity. And it is very tempting to continually assess and/or berate ourselves.

Instructions in Sitting

Please do this exercise for 20 minutes each day for the next three months.

How to Do It

1. Sit up straight in a chair with your feet flat on the floor.
2. Either close your eyes or gaze at a spot on the floor 6–8 feet in front of you.
3. Bring your awareness to your breathing—either on your abdomen, which rises and falls as you breathe, or to the tip of your nostrils where the air enters and leaves your nose. Select the area that you feel most. Do not change your breathing, simply begin to observe it. Do not change areas of attention.
4. Say quietly to yourself “in” when you inhale and “out” when you exhale. Between breaths bring your attention to the points where your body touches the chair, where your feet touch the floor.
5. Focus all of your attention on your breath. If you find your attention wandering, simply say “thought” to yourself and bring your attention back to your breathing. You may wish to label the thoughts as planning, memory, fantasy, and so on. You may simply use the word “thought” if you wish. If you begin to judge yourself, simply say “thought” or “judgment” and return your attention to breathing.
6. Acknowledge any sensations in your body by saying “sensation” and return your attention to breathing. Do the same with any emotions or feelings that may occur.

Moving to Action

Each week, take about 15 minutes to write out what you have learned about yourself by sitting and how you will take this knowledge into action.

Practice Sample 2: Personal

Planning, Scheduling, and Debriefing

Use the following format to organize yourself and attend to all aspects of your life.

Weekly Overview

List what you will have achieved by week’s end by consulting the following domains of concern list.

Domains of Concern

• health/body
• finance
• relaxation/leisure
• work/current projects
• marketing
• reading/studying
• maintenance: diet, education, household work, community, car, clothing, family, equipment, money, friends, others you specify

Weekly Scheduling

1. List your weekly accomplishment goals. Be sure they can be done in a week’s time.
2. Check off or draw a line through items when completed.
3. Add items as necessary throughout the week.

Weekly Debriefing

Ask yourself what you actually accomplished, even if you didn’t list it. Follow the daily debriefing procedure for transferring incomplete items.

Daily Overview

Each day read over the:

• List of weekly achievements
• List of domains of concern

Daily Scheduling

1. List activities and appointments for the day.
2. List actions required to complete weekly accomplishments.
3. Be sure to assign times to all activities.
4. Check off or draw a line through items when completed.
5. Add items as necessary throughout the day.

Daily Debriefing

Transfer items to future as necessary. After transferring any item three times, drop it from your activities unless it is of vital importance. If vital, ask for support in completing the item.

Practice Sample 3: Personal

Diet Instructions

1. Eat the following each day (see Fit or Fat Target Diet, by Covert Bailey—serving sizes and groups are described in the book):

   • 4 servings of the fruit and vegetable group

   • 4 servings of the grain and cereal group

   • 2 servings of the dairy group

   • 2 servings of the meat and fish group

   • Eat less than 25 grams of fat each day

   • East less than 2,000mg of sodium each day

   • Eat less than 2,000 calories each day

   • Drink 64oz of water each day

2. Use the following form to monitor your daily food intake (see Figure B.4).

FIGURE B.4 Food Intake Journal