When Good Meetings Go Bad, and How to Fix Them

Unfortunately, even if you’ve followed all the guidelines for conducting an effective meeting, things can still go wrong. You’re dealing with human beings, after all! They can derail even the most carefully thought-out agenda.

The best way to handle problems is to prepare for them as much as possible ahead of time by thinking about the attendees you’ve invited who tend to cause problems. A windbag? Consider asking him in advance of the meeting to focus his comments on a particular aspect for which you value his opinion. A constant critic? Follow up your meeting invitation with a suggestion that she lead the discussion on a particular aspect of your decision.

What to do if . . .

The following intervention techniques can serve as first-aid measures to help you get your group—or an individual who is part of your group—back on track in the midst of your meeting.

Participants arrive late or leave early

• Consistently begin and end meetings on time. People will come to respect your time limits and boundaries.

• Give participants (especially those who have a habit of being late) a job to do during the session. No one with an assigned responsibility wants to come in late to a meeting and scramble to get it done.

• At the beginning of the meeting, ask the group if everyone can stay until the designated end time. If not, consider adjusting the length of the meeting. Preempt early departures.

• After the meeting and in private, ask the person why he or she missed part of the meeting. Find out what the underlying causes for the behavior may be, if possible.

One participant dominates the discussion

• If you are standing, walk closer and closer to the person. This tends to draw group attention to you and away from the speaker.

• Thank him for his input, and call on some one else.

• If she finishes other people’s sentences, encourage her to let other people speak for themselves.

• Ask the group to change roles so that the quiet people speak up and those who have been talking remain silent for a while.

• For chronic interrupters, during a break, ask them to jot down their thoughts and wait until there is a pause to contribute them instead of just shouting them out.

The group keeps repeating points already made

• Keep track of ideas on a flip chart or whiteboard.

• Confirm your understanding of the ideas presented by “active listening.” That means restating ideas by saying something like “What I hear you saying is . . .” and repeating back to the participant a fair and accurate summary of what he or she said.

• When someone begins to repeat an already-listed idea, point to the chart or board and ask something like “It looks as though we’ve already covered that point. Is there something new you want to add?”

• If people still keep coming back to the point, you can seek resolution on the spot, saying something like “Well, this is obviously important to the group, so let’s deal with it right now.”

Participants disturb the meeting

• Explain the ground rules for participant behavior at the beginning.

• Try asking a question, including the transgressors among the people you’d like to hear from.

• Try asking for a single focus, saying something such as “Our purpose today was to shape our innovation strategy for the year. Can we please focus on that again?”

• Make fresh connections. If you’ve agreed on what to discuss and someone still seems off-track, ask her to explain how the topics are related. You might learn of a correlation that you hadn’t considered; if so, let the team decide whether to explore the idea now or, if it’s unrelated but still important, at a future meeting.

• Call for a break if the problem continues. Then, during the break, ask people individually what’s going on. Get at the reasons for the disturbance and, if necessary, directly request the offending parties to stop. Tell them you’ll address any legitimate concerns after the meeting.

The group gets stuck or confused

• Ask the group what’s going on or if there is something they don’t understand or don’t have enough information about.

• Remind the group what the agenda item is and what the specific objectives of that item are. Ask the group if there is a key point or issue that has not been raised and needs to be.

• Suggest a short break. Then return to the topic at hand or move it to a later position on the agenda or to a later meeting.

• If all else fails, remove the item from the agenda. You don’t need to be a superhero—your goal is to make your meeting effective. If something isn’t ripe for a good discussion, take it off the agenda and rethink how to better address the issue after the meeting.

The group falls silent

• Allow silence for a full minute. The group may need time to reflect on an idea or their own reactions to an issue, so wait before giving them a suggestion. While you may want them to respond right away, consider that thoughtful comments come from participants who take time to organize and articulate their reactions. Don’t be afraid of the silence.

• Ask the group directly, “I notice that you’ve fallen silent. Can someone say what’s happening here?”

• Ask people if they would like you to clarify something.

• Ask them if you are unaware of a key point or issue or if you have caused some confusion.

• Think about whether your behavior might be the problem. Ask yourself if you came on too strongly in an opinion or a preconceived solution.

• Ask the group if there is something everyone’s avoiding discussing that’s important.

• Take a short break to refocus and find new energy—but be clear that when the break is over, you expect to focus and finish. And don’t take a long break—five minutes is fine; with more than that, people tend to get sucked up into other tasks or to disconnect.

• If the group just seems worn out, consider ending the meeting and rescheduling.

There’s an elephant in the room

The group may avoid an issue or attempt to focus on one issue to the exclusion of others because members are afraid to bring up a particular subject. If you don’t realize there’s such an issue in advance of the meeting, you are likely to have some clues in the room: participants staring intently down at their notebooks and refusing to make eye contact with you, exchanging furtive glances with each other, or starting to speak and then censoring themselves. The problem could be a topic that seems too difficult to tackle, too taboo to raise, or that, if discussed, would create more work for the team. For example, if participants know that firing a subpar vendor would solve a problem but would mean they would need to start from scratch with a new vendor, they may not want to bring it up. Or they may be concerned about an impending round of layoffs, so they won’t be at their best in a group meeting—even if the meeting topic is unrelated.

If you know or suspect that something emotionally fraught lies behind the team’s malaise, it may be best to address the problem in more private, one-on-one settings, in which an individual is free to express emotions or personal questions related to the decision. But if it’s not something as sensitive as that, you need to move the group along within the meeting. Here’s how:

• If you realize what the issue is, raise it yourself to get the group moving again. Then ask the group to explain in detail the nature of the problem, issue, or opportunity. Find out how long it has existed, who is involved, and what the consequences are. Remember to thank a participant if he or she brings up a controversial or different viewpoint. That way, you’ll reinforce the idea that constructive debate is often a good way to find solutions.

• Let the group know how important it is to bring up all options, concerns, and issues, even if they are difficult. Let them know you won’t kill the messenger. It’s a common human urge to blame the bearer of bad news, but it’s wrong, so don’t do it. Even better, thank the person brave enough to be the messenger.

If real, angry conflict arises:

• Call an immediate halt to any bickering.

• If necessary, take a break and speak to the contenders individually.

• Let all members know that it’s fine to be passionate, but ask people who are unable to control their tempers to deal with their issues outside the meeting room.

• Reaffirm the ground rules and norms for behavior that you established at the beginning of the meeting.

• Encourage members to keep their comments positive and constructive and to try to see all sides of a contentious issue.

• Focus on the substance of ideas or opinions—not on the contributor’s personal style or status in the organization.

• Keep members from evaluating or judging each other’s ideas too quickly. For example, if it seems like every idea that the team suggests is getting attacked by other team members, you can say, “Now there’s an idea. Let’s not evaluate it just yet. Just let me write it down now, and we’ll get reactions to it later.”

• Use probing questions to steer members away from entrenched positions and to help uncover the underlying issues. “Work through this thought with me: What would happen if your group did agree to take on these new responsibilities?”

• As a last resort, ask the most contentious individuals to leave the meeting and then catch up with them later on.

You have a responsibility, as the meeting leader, to make sure you haven’t wasted your own or your participants’ time by letting a good meeting go bad. Be prepared for problems and challenges to come up, but stay calm and remind yourself—and your team—that your goal is to make it a productive session and that you want to keep everyone focused on having a healthy conversation.