Conclusion
On a quiet hillside in Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Los Angeles I conducted the memorial service for my brother Richard—the one who shared my sense of discovery with the 1956 Buick we tore apart when we were kids. It seemed as though my whole being was consumed by questions on that hillside, some of which didn’t have answers.
At that moment, it occurred to me that discovery had became a way of life at an early age. My impulse to question and learn, and my desire to hear other people engage in discovery, was partly to blame for my setting aside a career as a preacher. The other part was money—you have to make a living, of course, so I took my unbridled curiosity and applied it sales, where it was both a good fit and a profitable one. When I sold peace of mind associated with the real estate at Forest Lawn—we didn’t say we sold cemetery plots or crypts—my good questions meant good information, and good information meant sales.
Ever since then, it seems I’ve made my living asking questions, including investing 20 years in military service and further developing, employing, and ultimately teaching the skills you have learned in this book.
The only way I have ever known if I did a good job in teaching these skills is to detect “aha!” moments in my students. It’s the moment when I see they have integrated the material into their psyche. It’s when I hear a leading or yes/no question start to come out of their mouths—“Do you…” —and then a pause and a correction. Where “Do you” stood before, an interrogative has taken its place: “What do you…” A better question gets put in play immediately. I trust this has at least started to happen to you.
As a mnemonic device to reinforce the critical elements of good questioning, I came up with the following equation:
2 + 6 over F x 4 = Good Questioning
The parts mean this:
Question with the curiosity of a 2-year-old.
Use the six interrogatives—who, what, when, where, why, and how (and sometimes “huh?”).
Make sure to cover all four of the discovery areas: people, places, things, and events in time.
The result is efficient, effective, precise, and complete questioning, which translates into “good questioning.”
I wanted to conclude with some of the greatest questions ever posed. They’re great because they start with an interrogative, require a narrative response, and are likely to be questions you remember for the rest of your life. That’s a tall order!
So, for all of those who are kindred spirits in discovery, who deeply appreciate the learning value of a great question, here are my top 10. (I’m going to do this like David Letterman and go from 10 to 1, which is my favorite.)
10. Why was I born?
9. What is life?
8. What is death?
7. What is reality?
6. Where is heaven?
5. When will I feel satisfied?
4. Whom can I trust?
3. How do I know if I’m really in love?
2. How do I know if someone really loves me?
1. What would happen if...?