What We Know about Communication

There are certain aspects of communication that impact our day-to-day lives.

1.  No matter how hard one tries, one cannot avoid communicating. Many times we think we are not communicating because we are not verbally communicating. That is simply not the case. We are always communicating, whether we want to or not. We communicate nonverbally—with our eyes, facial expressions, gestures—and even by the color of our skin. During 30 minutes of discussion, people can exchange approximately 800 different nonverbal messages. The messages we send without words have a greater impact than when we speak.

2.  Communicating does not necessarily mean understanding. Can you think of a time when you were convinced that you got your message across but later found out quite the opposite?

3.  Communication is irreversible. Once you have communicated a message and it has been received, either verbally or nonverbally, it is irreversible. Have you ever said something that you have regretted? Or, have you ever wished you had said something and did not?

4.  Communication is affected by physical and social settings. When we interact with someone, it is not in isolation but within a specific physical and social surrounding. For example, when our boss talks to us about a memo from behind his or her desk, the conversation will probably be quite different than when we are having lunch at the corner deli.

5.  Communication is dynamic. Communication is an ongoing and ever-changing process. As participants in communication, we are constantly affected by other people’s messages and, as a consequence, we undergo continual change. Every time we interact with someone, we leave that moment with new information… and a changed relationship.