As Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe once said, “Instruction does much, but encouragement does everything.” Coaching is a form of encouragement. Coaching is important for several reasons:
• New generations in the work place. Generations X and Y are members of today’s work place. These generations are not going to stay with the company to retire and collect a gold watch. The basic mind-set of Generations X and Y is that they will stay at a company as long as they are growing and learning—as long as they are being coached. Once the opportunity for growth and learning ceases to exist, they have maximized the experience and will take their expertise onto the next job. But if the manager is coaching often and well, then the employees won’t leave as quickly because they feel there is more to learn. They will also be more motivated.
• There is constant change. The business world is in a rapid state of change, and we must change with it. As Nelson Jackson said, “I do not believe you can do today’s job with yesterday’s methods and be in business tomorrow.” The advantage of coaching is the ability to coach people through change on a one-to-one basis in an immediate fashion. Because the world of business is changing constantly, the employees have to grow every year. The skill and abilities that an employee has this year will not be enough to be successful next year. To use a computer analogy, each year an employee has to be a new version of him/herself (i.e., version 2.0, 2.2, etc.).
• An increase in productivity. A coached employee is typically more productive because they are getting coaching on a regular basis. If the manager’s responsibility is to get results for the business, then coaching is critical. Anyone who thinks that is not the case should imagine a professional football team without a coach. A new coach can have a tremendous impact on a previously poor-performing team. An employee who is coached will feel more appreciated and will be more productive.
• To set succession plans. Smart managers develop employees for the next level of promotion before they are needed. Succession planning is an excellent idea; however, a missing piece in many succession plans is the manager’s ability to coach the employees to the next level. The manager should always be working on developing the employees on the team so that if the need arises, there is someone ready to fill that position. That is the role that coaching can play.
As a manager, it is assumed that you already know how to coach. The critical issue is being a more motivating coach. Some of us have been privileged to work for managers who are
talented motivators. To be a more motivating coach, apply the following eight key concepts:
1. Coaching to their needs. The magic of tapping into the power of motivating coaching is first and foremost to remember it is about the employees. When a manager has a mind-set that is employee centric, the employee can tell. In my career, I have often been shocked at employees’ reactions when they realized that I actually cared about them both professionally and personally. This made a huge difference in their level of motivation and in the relationship. Motivating coaching is not only about the head, it is about the heart. The goal is to talk about employees’ thoughts and feelings and about the most important topic in the world— their careers. I have had managers who didn’t care about me personally or professionally, and it was very clear in their approach to coaching, which was impersonal, cold, and infrequent. I could tell that they didn’t care, and at some point, it started to impact my level of motivation. To coach to the employee’s needs, the manager must find out and fully understand what the employee wants for their career in the short, mid, and long term. (This was discussed as part of the growth and development meeting mentioned in the last chapter.) Your goal as a manager is to do everything in your power to help them get there. If they see the effort you are putting into their development, they will be more motivated.
2. Coaching with honesty. The worst coach in the world is the coach who is dishonest with their employees. I have worked with managers who would misrepresent the truth to their team members for one of several reasons: (1) They wanted to avoid conflict, (2) they didn’t want to address the real issue at hand for a multitude of reasons, or (3) they were concerned about how the employee would react. It is the manager’s obligation to be honest with employees because no growth happens without honesty and that leads to poor motivation. I don’t think there is an employee in the world who wants to be misled. This is a concept that Jack Welch of GE calls “false kindness.” He says that managers who are reluctant to tell an employee that they are underperforming are doing the employee a disservice in the long term. Managers have to be honest and that takes some guts, but it is easier when they know it is the right thing to do. The manager should explain to the employee up front that part of the agreement of coaching will be that both parties will be honest. This creates a setting for trust and motivation. The manager should also explain why the honesty is so important for their growth and make sure that they understand that sometimes it will not be easy, but the intent is for them to grow.
3. Explain the reason for the coaching. The manager should explain to each employee the reasons behind the coaching, which should be explained and set up when they are hired. Coaching is part of the responsibility of each team member, and they are going to get coaching on a regular basis. The coaching will be done for several reasons: (1) so that they can continue to grow, (2) so that there can be a continuous dialogue between them and their manager, (3) so that issues can be addressed sooner before they become problems, and (4) so that they feel appreciated and acknowledged. When the reasons for the coaching are explained up front, then employees know why the coaching is happening. The manager can then lead off a coaching discussion with “I know that you and I have talked about the concept that you will get continuous coaching, and if you recall, the goal is to help you improve and grow. I want to talk to you about what happened in the meeting today….” This provides the employee with a motive behind why the coaching is happening. It is not because the manager is being mean or spiteful or picking on them—they are coaching them because they care about their future. That can be a very motivating message. I once had a coaching discussion with an employee that lasted from 5:00 until 7:00 in the evening. When we left the office that night, the employee was upset. They came back the next day and said, “I thought about it last night and it is very clear to me that you brought this up for one reason and one reason only—because you care.”
4. Set the right coaching environment. It is very important in motivating coaching to set the stage properly. This includes the physical space, lack of distractions, privacy, and verbal and nonverbal signals. Simply put, motivating coaching is about making a connection. The key to making a connection is to make sure that the environment is set up correctly. The first aspect is the physical space. The physical space should be free of distractions, comfortable, and suited for coaching. As opposed to talking with a desk between the two parties, you should be sitting side by side. This makes for a more comfortable and less adversarial seating arrangement. The coaching can also be done off site, but care must be taken to ensure that the location affords some privacy and isn’t too loud. The manager should set aside time when there will be uninterrupted time for coaching. The coaching should be private and formal: Speaking to someone in the hallway for two minutes is not coaching. All computers, cell phones, Blackberries, and other communication devices should be off. It is very disrespectful to allow interruptions during coaching, and answering e-mail and the phone is absolutely off limits for one reason: You can’t make a connection if you are multitasking! The manager should focus all their efforts and attention on the employee. Eye contact, body language, and listening skills all play into setting the right tone. Most employees have never really been listened to and instead have been given lip service throughout their careers. The fact that a manager finally pays attention is motivating. A great way for the manager to set up the session is to say, “I have set aside some time for us to talk today. I have asked my calls to be held, and I just want to talk for the next 30 minutes about ____. How does that sound? Good. I will promise you my undivided attention and I will not be interrupted unless it is an emergency.” Setting the right environment will lead to great dialogue and more motivated employees.
5. Make it fair and balanced. All managers in an organization should be required to take coaching training. Unskilled managers who are coaching are a dangerous liability to their companies. I say that because I have known managers who weren’t fair or balanced in the way they coached. Their coaching was more of a diatribe than a dialogue—a tongue lashing instead of a talk. All of us want to be respected and, at the very least, be treated fairly. We would actually prefer special treatment, but we are satisfied with being treated fairly. The key in motivating coaching is being fair. Fairness consists of two components: (1) a balance of positive and constructive criticism and (2) a chance to be heard and treated with respect. The manager as a coach should always talk about what went well and then what should be improved. There is a very important reason to take this approach: It makes the coaching more effective because employees are more likely to accept the criticism if it also comes with some compliments. It is a principle of psychology that works well. If our manager is “beating up on us” all the time, then at some point we will just shut down and stop listening. However, if our manager talks about what we do well and areas for improvement, then we are more likely to accept it. For coaching to be fair, it also has to be about the performance and not about the person. If a manager is coaching and says, “I think you did a poor job on the Jones project,” then the person will feel like they are being attacked. If the manager says, “I was disappointed with the results on the Jones project,” then it is about performance, not the person. This will at least lead the employee to think the constructive criticism is fair. The key point in all of this is to keep in mind the true objective of coaching: to motivate employees and to help them grow and develop. If the coaching doesn’t achieve both of these goals, then it has failed.
6. Coaching should be free of emotion. During coaching sessions, managers need to maintain a professional and calm demeanor at all times. The manager must display leadership in a calm manner. A manager should never yell, curse, or “lose it.” There are multiple reasons for this that are obvious. If a manager gets upset or emotional, it can short circuit their ability to think. The loss of control, however, has an even more damaging effect on the employee: If the manager gets upset, then the employee gets upset as well. Coaching when upset will not work for the manager or the employee. If the manager is calm and professional, then the impact can be quite different—it can have a calming effect on an employee who is upset. In addition, it shows respect for the employee, and that is motivating. It is okay to be concerned, puzzled, confused, shocked, or disappointed, but never angry or mad.
7. Coaching should be positioned. Managers should be mentally prepared for coaching by reviewing needed information and thinking through how to position the coaching. The art of motivating coaching is to properly position the issue in a way that leads the employee to want to be motivated to resolve the issue. It has been said that “a diplomat can tell a man to go to hell and make him look forward to the trip.” The same applies with coaching; a manager can tell an employee anything as long as it is positioned properly. The way to position any constructive coaching is to again put it back to the employee’s growth. You are bringing up this issue because you care about them, want them to succeed, and want them to do well—otherwise you wouldn’t be bringing it up. You are doing them a favor. I once coached an employee on a problem in the way her work was being perceived by others. It was very tricky because I knew she was doing the work, she just was being perceived by others as a slacker. I called her in and told her that there was a problem and I wanted to discuss it. She was very upset and was being very defensive and angry that people would accuse her of not working hard. I told her that I believed she worked hard, but this was about perception, which is as important in the corporate world as reality. She was still upset and resistant to the discussion. I then said, “Look, I am only bringing this up because I care about you, and I think you should be aware of the perception so that we can change it. I want you to do well.” That statement changed the complexion of the conversation. We then talked about how to go about changing the perception.
8. Coaching should be about dialogue. The key to effective motivating coaching is the dialogue between the coach/manager and the employee. Too often I have observed coaching sessions in which the manager talked on and on, and the employee couldn’t get a word in edgewise. The goal of effective coaching is to get the employee to talk about their performance, their perception of the performance, and how they feel about their progress. Managers should be equipped with lots of open-ended opinion-finding questions in order to have healthy dialogue. One of the most effective techniques for getting feedback and creating dialogue is to ask the employee about how they think they did in terms of performance. The manager might say to the employee, “Jim, I want to talk about the Jones project. How did it go overall and what do you think went well? Secondly, what do you think could be improved?” This leads to the employee talking about how they thought it went and gives the manager a chance to ask other questions. This impacts the coaching in two ways: (1) The dialogue begins to flow and the employee feels that their opinion is important enough to discuss and (2) the manager might learn details and information that they were not aware of at the time. The worst mistake a manager can make is not listening to the employee when they are talking about their opinions. As managers, we can be arrogant—”Why listen, because we already know the answer!” Manager arrogance can have a very negative impact on an employee. Managers need to listen carefully and not assume that they have all the answers.
The mark of a manager is to manage materials and processes. The mark of a true leader is to coach and motivate people. The only asset a company has is its people. The trucks and factories and stores might seem like assets, but without the right people to run them, they have no value. As basketball coach Rick Pitino once said, “The only way to get people to like working hard is to motivate them. Today, people must understand why they are working hard. Every individual in an organization is motivated by something different.”