THE POWER OF YOUR NETWORK

Creating an Elite Circle by
Raphael Sofoluke

“NETWORKING IS MARKETING. MARKETING YOURSELF, YOUR UNIQUENESS, WHAT YOU STAND FOR.”
–christine comaford-lynch¹

Building your network and creating valuable relationships are essential skills in business, yet it often presents itself as a daunting task. The phrase, “your network is your net worth”² has floated among professionals for years. It refers to the idea that the people you have in your business or friendship circle can be more valuable than what you have in your bank account. There needs to be more emphasis on not only increasing profits and revenue, but also on building strong networks and valuable relationships.

So why is your network valuable? According to Review42, “85 percent of vacant positions are filled through networking and 70 percent of people found a job through connections in a company.”³ According to Tech Jury, “80 percent of professionals believe that career success can be elevated through professional networking.”⁴ For the career professional, this means that, not only is networking important in getting a foot in the door, but it is also essential to being able to elevate yourself and climb up the corporate ladder. Dr. Wayne Frederick emphasized the importance of networking to us: “Networking is important. The more people you know, the more doors will open for you. It’s also a critical way to explore opportunities and possibilities that you might never have known existed. However, it’s not enough to put all of your energies on networking and avoid doing the work to better yourself and enhance your skills. Networking is a part of a strategy—it is not a strategy in and of itself.” While Ken Gibbs adds, “I saw what working ‘twice as hard’ looked like in real time.” Ken particularly noticed this when he attended West Roxbury private school, a very prestigious school in Boston. Realizing that his white peers were already ahead of him academically, Ken needed to get a tutor to catch up. It wasn’t long before the reality that many of his white peers were well connected and had already been prepped on some of the lessons they would be taught, even before starting private school, dawned on him.

Ken believes that networking starts way before you land your first job. He relayed to me the harsh reality of how some of the biggest networks start through education systems and, in particular, private education. Private schools increase accessibility to networks to those from a high, generally white social class. This often creates elite circles, which tend to exclude those from Black backgrounds. In the United States, Private School Review reports that “the average amount of minority students in private schools is approximately 27 percent.”⁵ According to the British Educational Research Journal, “In private school with higher levels of educational achievement, children are more likely to go on to secure a high-status occupation and also have higher wages.”⁶ This means that those who are able to go to private schools are given an advantage over those who cannot afford to. An example of this can be seen in Eton College, an institution in the UK that has schooled 20 prime ministers, including our most recent leaders, David Cameron, and Boris Johnson.

Crazy, isn’t it? A former student who went to Eton in the 1980s stated that “kids arrived there with this extraordinary sense that they knew they were going to run the country,”⁷ and according to reports, the school puts a premium on individualism and encourages students to pursue any dream they might have. The encouragement given to those at private school as opposed to those in state schools creates the chasm of opportunity. This unfair disadvantage only serves to reinforce our point made earlier that “talent is equally distributed; opportunity is not.”

For Ken, moving from a private school to a state school and realizing that the work he was given on returning was elementary was a shock. He says: “When I did get back to state school, I didn’t encounter anything in the curriculum that I had been doing in 7th grade at private school until I reached the 12th grade in public school.”

For entrepreneurs, networking is just as vital as it is for the working professional. A study on network development for entrepreneurs said that “an entrepreneur’s personal network evolves from an identity-based network—dominated by strong ties—toward an intentionally managed one, rich in weak ties.”⁸ This study proposes that, in the emerging phase of their businesses and careers, entrepreneurs should rely primarily on strong ties, because those ties will usually provide resources. Later, in the early growth stage, entrepreneurs should expand their network to include weak ties. In the early growth phase, it is necessary to develop a diverse network that is rich in weak ties, as this will help in gaining information on new business leads.⁹ Learning networking skills very early on in your career or in the development of your business can contribute to progressing more quickly. So, when creating your business plan, it’s important that you actually devise strategies about how you are planning to build your network.

In my experience of attending business events, being the only Black person in the room made it harder for me to feel comfortable networking. This may not be the case for others, but, for me, the general nerves of networking combined with being a “minority” certainly had an effect on my confidence. In fact, walking into predominantly white spaces at networking events can impact the ability of even the most confident Black entrepreneurs and professionals!

“Being a Black professional is often to be alone,”¹⁰ was published in an article written by Adia Harvey Wingfield in The Atlantic. Adia, a Professor of Sociology at Washington University in St. Louis, went on to say that most Black doctors, lawyers, journalists, and all of those in white-collar positions that may need special training and credentialing often have to work in environments in which they are in the minority.

When I speak with my Black friends and peers, they regularly mention the uncomfortable feeling of going to events and exhibitions and feeling that not only were there little or no Black people in the room, but also the speaker panels lacked Black representation.

I created the UK Black Business Show so that Black business owners and professionals could have a dedicated space for face-to-face networking, building meaningful connections, and formulating strong business relationships.

The UK Black Business Show allows Black entrepreneurs to network freely in a predominantly Black space while still inviting those from other backgrounds to attend, listen to stories, and be inspired by leaders from the Black community.

In the UK, the Association of Event Organisers reports that exhibitions contribute £11 billion ($15 billion) to the UK economy,¹¹ while UFI (The Global Association of the Exhibition Industry) reports that, globally, the exhibition industry generates “$325 billion in total output.”¹²

As much as we are in an age where digital interaction has increased, it’s important not to downplay the value of engaging with people in physical environments. Though not all networking can be done face-to-face, Forbes Insights found that, face-to-face meetings were more effective for persuasion (91 percent), engagement (86 percent) and decision-making (82 percent).¹³ These figures elucidate just how important face-to-face interaction and networking is and the direct implication on key business decisions it has. As an entrepreneur myself, I have experienced the benefits of networking, including gaining industry knowledge, learning from the success and failures of some of my peers, making new business connections, acquiring potential business partners, and more. In some ways, this book is an exercise in building your network—we’ve spoken to a multitude of entrepreneurs, professionals, and allies in the hope that it helps you gain from our network and utilize the advice from leading industry experts.

Jay-Ann Lopez and Trina Charles, founders of Curlture, as well as the founders of Black Girl Gamers, and the Curve Catwalk (the UK’s first plus-size dance exercise class), offer us their advice. Trina spoke about the need to create these platforms because preexisting traditional spaces are lacking in opportunities for Black women to network in. She says: “Whenever I hear the phrase ‘networking,’ the first thing that comes to my mind is ‘finding your tribe.’” What I liked about her description is that she hinted at how important it is to find networking groups and platforms that give you a sense of belonging.

When looking for groups to network in, you have to be deliberate—know who you want to speak to and what you want to get out of it. Are you looking for a specific skill set? Or do you simply want to be around like-minded people who share the same ethos as you? Whatever it is, approach networking with a sense of purpose. Trina consolidated this idea in my mind when she told me about the Curve Catwalk: “If I talk about the Curve Catwalk and the dance classes, it’s something that relates to me and is something I am interested in. So, essentially, I am trying to find like-minded people who are interested in similar things or have experienced some of the same pain points [around exercising, not on the basis of aesthetic goals]. My pain point was that I couldn’t find a space where I felt accepted, so I created my own, and I found other women that felt exactly the same.”

Entrepreneurs are some of the biggest experts in turning frustration into creation. Frustrated with the constant back-and-forth emails that come with trying to schedule a meeting, Tope Awotona set about creating a platform to solve the problem. Calendly, a scheduling software that automated the process of arranging meetings launched in 2013, now has over eight million monthly users and in January 2021 was valued at more than three billion dollars.

Like the UK Black Business Show, the Curve Catwalk was built on the frustration of limited spaces and opportunities for people to network.

Jay has enjoyed playing video games since she was young and often struggled to find other Black women who were interested in gaming. After facing sexist and racist comments when playing video games online, Jay created a community for Black women to support each other while gaming. Launched in 2015, Black Girl Gamers now has a huge following on its social media platforms. Jay offers her own advice on networking and building a network which I found particularly interesting: “Find people who think differently but share similar values,” she says. “You want to connect with people who understand what you are doing but can share a different perspective because, that way, you open yourself up to a new manner of thinking. It’s always good to have more than one point of view on a single topic.”

We often go into networking situations looking for people similar to ourselves. Yes, there are benefits to this; but, when you are trying to solve a problem, you need someone who thinks differently from you, too. Many of the successful people I’ve spoken to have intentionally gone out of their way to find people that are diametrically opposed in their thinking. Often, we gravitate toward people who remind us of ourselves, but there are actually great benefits in creating and building diverse networks. The benefits of diverse thinking can be seen in a study by Economic Geography in which they concluded that “increased cultural diversity is a boon to innovativeness.”¹⁴ The results also revealed that “businesses run by culturally diverse leadership teams were more likely to develop new products than those with homogenous leadership.”¹⁵

Mark Maciver, founder of SliderCuts, offered an alternative view to networking during our conversation. He shares this piece of advice for entrepreneurs: “Stop trying to find the perfect places where you feel like your seeds are going to grow. Go wherever you’ve been invited, as you never know where your seed is going to land and be watered. Throw your seeds everywhere you possibly can.” Mark’s analogy vividly paints the picture that you may not see an immediate response from networking and that, ultimately, it could be considered a numbers game until you make the right connections.

As someone in the sales and events industry, I know that the number of calls or emails made directly from me is positively correlated with the likelihood of completing a deal. I learned very early on in my career, when I started as a telesales executive, that if I made more calls than anyone else, then there was a high probability that I would get more “yeses” than anyone else. Of course, there were times where I would get “nos,” but that didn’t faze me; I was resilient and would keep trying until something positive would come through. But as Mark described in his analogy, it is ultimately a numbers game. You can’t always find the perfect event or environment for networking, but just being in the right spaces and speaking to people enhances the potential for opening doors you didn’t know were available.

Opeyemi and I spoke with Mathew Knowles—author, professor, lecturer, music executive, artist manager, and the father of superstars Beyoncé and Solange. Praised as the man who turned Destiny’s Child into a global phenomenon, he boasts an impressive portfolio of 450 million worldwide record sales. In his early career, Mathew spent 20 years in corporate America working for Xerox.

During our Zoom chat, Mathew told us about one of the defining moments in his career. When Beyoncé lost the TV talent competition Star Search, he decided he would venture into the music industry himself, feeling that he needed to go back to college because, as he concisely put it, “knowledge is power.” Mathew expands on his reasons for going back to college: “One of the traits of failure for entrepreneurs is that they don’t have the knowledge. So I went back to college to get as much knowledge as I could, and I went to every seminar in the music industry about business, and I began to build relationships.” Looking at the initial steps Mathew took to begin his music career, we see that first, he acquired knowledge, and second, he began to build relationships. Building relationships can only be done through successful networking, and it is clear that it’s one of the most important things to do when starting a business. In our conversation, in reference to Solange and Beyoncé’s albums, Mathew jokingly tells us that he wanted to “have A Seat at the Table and drink Lemonade,”¹⁶ and he certainly got his seat through patience and seizing opportunity when it arose.

Reflecting on his time at Xerox, Mathew says he knew the importance of not only creating his own opportunities, but also how valuable just being “in the room” was to discovering opportunities. Mathew would intentionally get to work early and pick up the one newspaper his branch manager would read. He knew that if he kept on doing that, it would at some point lead to a conversation with him. It did, and Mathew was later invited to shadow his manager in some key meetings. What was significant about this was that Mathew reported to a sales manager who reported to the branch manager, and sales reps generally never interacted with branch managers. Mathew tells us, “I would go to these meetings with my manager, and the room would be full of older white men. I didn’t know who they were, and they would ask me to get the coffee and do photocopying for them.” Mathew continued to attend the meetings and to carry out these tasks until his opportunity came 3–4 months later, when they finally asked him a question, and, not only that, they reacted positively to his answer. Describing this experience, Mathew said, “I used to sit behind their table, but then they said: ‘Matt, come here and sit at the table,’ and I can only tell you, seated there were the President of Exxon, the President of Shell, and the President of Pennzoil.” Mathew is a great example of someone having patience and seizing their opportunity when it arises; the more he attended those meetings, the more he increased his chances of building positive connections.

Research shows that “people tend to prefer things they’re familiar with—whether people, objects, or other stimuli,”¹⁷ so by constantly going to networking events or spaces or just making yourself visible to senior leaders, you are enhancing your chance of finding a new opportunity or building a valuable relationship.

We spoke to the impressive Omar Wasow, an Assistant Professor in Princeton’s Department of Politics. Omar focuses much of his research on race and politics, protest movements, and statistical methods. He was also the co-founder of BlackPlanet.com, a social network established in 2001, which grew to over 3 million active users. It was sold in 2008 for $38 million. BlackPlanet was one of the first social media platforms to bring celebrities and regular consumers together, and it is even reported that Myspace, the largest social media platform between 2005 and 2008, took inspiration from it.

As one of the pioneers of social networking, Omar believes that networking has been really important in his career, but he also likens it to low probability bets. Omar says, “You go to a conference, you mingle, you meet people, and then six months later, somebody’s like, ‘Hey, I’ve got this opportunity you might be a good fit for,’ and you can’t plan for that, you just kind of have to be visible.” Visibility and patience are two vital components to networking that we witness in successful people.

“Being visible will always give you an advantage over those who are invisible.”

Omar continues, “It may come six months after that particular event, or it might not come at all, but being visible will always give you an advantage over those who are invisible.” Omar also compares networking to success in the music and film industry: “You might have one hit for every nine failures, but that hit can be good enough to make your business profitable.”

As we further discussed the importance of networks and networking, Omar highlighted two strategies which he believes the majority of people use to network: the “explorer strategy” and the “exploit strategy.” He says, “In explore mode, you are seeking opportunities, you’re trying to grow your business and find new clients, so it’s important for you to be visible.” Omar describes exploit strategy as much of what he was doing for the first 15 years in his career: “I was digging deep in a particular area and I was not high profile. I was doing some networking and going to conferences, which helped with jobs and other things, but it was very narrow.” The need to have the right trade-off between profile-building “explore” work versus the more narrow “exploitation” work is paramount for success. Each tactic has its own value attached to it, and one can sometimes preclude the other, which means there is caution to be taken in balancing the two modes. It’s important to know which networking strategy is the best to start off with. As a working professional, the networking you do in a new job would begin within your team, management line, and business stakeholders. As you progress through your career, you should put more emphasis on speaking with your senior leaders and getting their buy-in, thus strengthening your network within the company.

According to Smart Insights, more than half of the world now uses social media. A staggering 4.57 billion people around the world now use the Internet, and 346 million new users have come online within the last 12 months.¹⁸ With the emergence of social media platforms and deliberate networking platforms, such as LinkedIn, accessibility is no longer the issue. Now, more than ever, it is even easier to reach out to those who you would like to build a business relationship with. However, even with the different forms of digital connection, we can see that the forms of interaction (such as video calling, emailing, and phone calling) all have different levels of intimacy—a phone call offers a different type of intimacy and could potentially be more effective than a video call or email given the scenario.

Whether speaking face-to-face or digitally, creating the right lasting, strategic, worthwhile relationships is still a difficult task for a professional or entrepreneur to master. There are some that enjoy getting out and meeting people, contacting potential “colleagues” out of the blue, and establishing a good rapport, while there are others who feel anxious at the thought of a cold approach. Whether it’s something you enjoy or not, you must learn these skills to be successful in any capacity. John Donne’s famous quote, “No man is an island,”¹⁹ sums up networking and building a network perfectly. Humans are social creatures, so we work better in a community rather than in isolation. Reaching the top of any career will require some sort of help at some stage.

The Characteristics of a Good Networker

“The currency of real networking is not greed, but generosity.” –Keith Ferrazzi²⁰

The characteristics that a good networker must have is not often discussed. Whatever medium you choose to make your initial approach, you must ensure that you are coming across as sincere, authentic, and collaborative.

When I asked Ken Gibbs about the importance of networking, he said that “networking is invaluable, and you have to go into it with an actual focus.” Whether it’s time or money, people only invest in people they trust, so it’s essential that they buy into you right away. Keep it simple—your initial introduction does not need to be lengthy. Introduce who you are, what you do, why you want to connect, and maybe anything else that differentiates you from the other people interested in connecting with them. You have to ensure your behavior in social settings and also online does not push people away from connecting with you. Ask yourself, are you an approachable person?

Let’s discuss some of the tactics you can employ to become a good networker.

Have Confidence

Whether it’s sending that initial email or finding the courage to speak to someone at an event, we all need a little confidence boost. As a young Black man, I used to think, “Why would they want to speak to me? What’s the point in messaging this person or going up to that person?” But once I built up my confidence, all of that changed. Whenever I feel nervous, even with my developed confidence, I think about an inspiring quote by Wayne Gretzky, who says, “You miss 100 percent of the shots you don’t take.” Without trying to shoot, you cannot score, so if you let fear hold you from taking aim, you will never get the chance to succeed. Those who try constantly and fail are still better off than those who do not try at all, simply because they are building their confidence and learning from each failure.

Prepare and practice what you would say at an event and conduct research on the industry of the event you are going to. Understand what challenges the companies face, what the latest trends are, and anything else which may help you in conversation.

Listen

All great relationships start with listening. When two people are able to listen and find out more about each other’s needs and wants, the more likely they are to establish a good rapport. As much as talking is important, there is a reason the Greek philosopher Epictetus said, “We have two ears and one mouth, so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.”²¹ When you listen openly without speaking, you are able to hear about opportunities, gain knowledge, learn lessons, and much more.

Be Authentic

People respond to genuine people. The people with the biggest networks and strongest relationships are those who show authenticity in their interactions with others. Psychology Today says that authentic people act in a way that shows their true self and how they feel, expressing their whole self genuinely rather than showing people only one particular side of themselves.²²

When speaking with our contributors in researching and writing this book, authenticity was a quality that was constantly brought up as one of the key things they look for when speaking to new people. According to research, within the first seven seconds of meeting, people will have already made an impression of who you are.²³ Other research suggests that all it takes is a tenth of a second to start determining traits like trustworthiness. You should not be too pushy in first interactions, messages, and conversations. They should flow naturally to create a genuine bond.

We sat down with DJ and presenter Trevor Nelson, MBE. Trevor, who was born and raised in Hackney, Stoke Newington, UK, started his broadcasting career in 1985 as “Madhatter” on Kiss FM (originally a pirate radio station that gained its legal license in 1990). He began to DJ with Soul II Soul, promoted numerous club nights, worked in A&R at Cooltempo and EMI and was instrumental in building the careers of D’Angelo, Mica Paris, and Lynden David Hall. In 1996, Trevor moved to BBC Radio 1 to present the first ever national R&B show, “The Rhythm Nation.” A year later, he began a Saturday afternoon program, which gained him a MOBO Award for Best DJ in 1997.²⁴ Trevor Nelson is a pioneer of UK Rap and R&B, and also showcased some of the biggest American artists to the UK scene. Today, Trevor remains a DJ on BBC Radio 2 and BBC 1Xtra and continues to hold influence in and advocate for the music industry.

Trevor epitomizes authenticity. I followed his career for years, and when we met, he came across exactly how he appears on radio and in the media: friendly, sincere, and humble. When speaking about networking, Trevor said he actually stopped attending events, because everywhere he would go, someone would step in front of him and ask for his email or number as a route to get into the industry. This is an example of where “explore” mode expires.

Those in the public eye may not enjoy having people come up to them asking for things; it can be rather exhausting. The same applies to online networking attempts, too. So be thoughtful about how you behave in face-to-face networking settings with people who already have the added pressure of being well-known.

Be Impactful

Trevor offers some advice for those trying to be better at networking, particularly those in the music industry. “No matter how small it is, what are you great at? What have you done that is worth talking about? I always say to people, don’t give me 10 demos, give me your best song, and if you don’t know what your best song is, you’re in the wrong industry,” he says. “Don’t overload people. What’s your best attribute? Just focus on that. People often get swamped, so have no patience or time.”

Even with his words of advice, Trevor is concise and straight to the point. Some people at networking events may have a limited time to speak, so it’s all about impact. In those few minutes, you must come across confident to make your point without being too pushy. It’s also worth mentioning that no matter how hard you try, you may not create a bond with some people, and that’s okay. There are enough people to network with and who you can create lasting relationships with.

Collaborate

“Networking is an enrichment program, not an entitlement program.”
–Susan Roane²⁵

Networking isn’t all about you. In any relationship, two people have to offer something to each other for it to be beneficial.

Do not go into a networking scenario if you are not open to being collaborative. It can be draining on the other person to always give and not receive. As much as you want to grow, so does the other person, so ensure that you are able to listen and spot areas where you could potentially help them. David McQueen, entrepreneur, professional speaker, and executive coach, described his view on networking and the importance of relationships and collaborations. When asked about his thoughts on the key elements of being a good networker, David says, “Networking is reciprocal, and it has to be genuine. There are people who reach out to me to set up a call, but I don’t have a relationship with them, so I’ll ask them to send me an email instead. You have to build relationships with people and have a connection. You don’t always have to give to receive, but I’ve had people who I’ve given stuff to, and maybe five or six years later, they reciprocated with something else that’s life changing for me.”

We also spoke with Pamela Hutchinson, Global Head of Diversity and Inclusion at Bloomberg, who is cited as one of the most recognized thought leaders and vocal advocates for diversity across the private sector, with more than 20 years’ experience in managing diversity across engineering, financial services, technology, and media. Pamela emphasized the importance of collaboration. “I think it’s really critical to have a network. Utilize your network but not just to progress yourself,” she says. “For me, networks are a two-way street: you give and people give back.”

Follow Up

Have you ever met someone at an event or show, had a great conversation, collected their business card, and added them on LinkedIn, but taken a month or two to follow up? Don’t worry, you’re not the only one. In most cases, taking a month or two to follow up with someone is too long. To avoid this, I would suggest an initial message along the lines of, “it was great to meet you, and I look forward to connecting with you in the future.” Gathering 50 business cards and doing nothing with them is similar to not spending money you have converted for a vacation and taking it back home. Yes, you may have the opportunity to use the money again, but in some cases, with time, the value of that money is not what it was when you received it, and by the time you do decide to use it, it may not be worth what it used to be.

Nurture Your Network

All good relationships are developed over time and, like a plant, they need to be watered often for them to grow. The relationships that are watered over time have stronger roots, and those that are left alone with little or no water at all eventually die. A good networker knows how to keep a relationship alive and growing. The importance of this characteristic mustn’t be taken for granted; it is possible for you to have all the above characteristics but fail to nurture your network. Like a plant, nurturing your network is essential to growth, and if one of the ways you feed your connection is missing, it will die.

Have Integrity

In business, integrity and respect are fundamental attributes, not just in networking, but in every day. Integrity has helped a number of successful entrepreneurs and professionals in being able to network well throughout their career.

Adrian Grant spoke with us to share his story and advice on business. Adrian is a producer, director, and writer who has worked in the entertainment and media industries for over 30 years, producing magazines, books, records, videos, television, concerts, and theater shows. Adrian’s career started in 1988, when he published the Michael Jackson fanzine Off The Wall, which, within a couple of years, grew from a circulation of 200 to 25,000 copies, distributed in 47 different countries.

This led to an amazing 20-year working relationship with the “King of Pop.” He created Thriller Live—a theatrical show now seen by nearly 5 million people worldwide, and the twelfth biggest West End show of all time. Adrian also produced the West End show Respect La Diva and the recent UK tour of The Aretha Franklin Songbook. Currently, Adrian produces the annual Visionary Honours, which celebrates inspirational culture, media, and entertainment that has influenced social change and debate.²⁶

For someone who was able to have such longevity in a creative industry, one that thrives on constant networking, Adrian admitted that it’s not something he really enjoys. It made me ask how he has managed to grow a successful network. “Integrity and having a good name in business is highly important,” he says. “Making sure that you’re just respectful and deliver what you say you’re going to deliver will ensure that good word-of-mouth publicity will spread. Thriller has traveled internationally, so people know my work, and this has helped to grow my network.”

Adrian continues, “Whether it’s going to a meeting on time or giving people what they’ve asked for, follow through so that people will want to work with you again. They’re going to recommend you, which will help you grow your network.”

Golden Advice for Networking

• Find your tribe and locate your audience. Put together a business plan; you should know who your target audience is and the types of people you need to connect with to grow your business or venture. You need to do your research and find where these people are going to be. You need to narrow it down to specifics.
• Prepare before any interaction. Have in mind the end result that you want to achieve when you meet and speak to people in any medium. Though you can’t predict exactly how a conversation will go, your objective should be to exchange business cards or details with a view toward setting up a further interaction.
• Take your time and make the effort. Networking requires time, effort, and long hours. It’s not just about going to one event or sending a few LinkedIn message requests at once. It needs to be something that you allocate time in your calendar to.

Networking Strategies

“Networking is a lot like nutrition and fitness: we know what to do, the hard part is making it a top priority.”
–Herminia Ibarra²⁷

Black professionals who are able to stay at a company and climb the ranks are employees who have successfully figured out “how to navigate white spaces,” something which we will go into in Chapter 4. They are also people who clearly display great networking attributes with their peers and senior leaders at their company.

Building relationships and networking as a professional starts as soon as you walk through the door. My advice for a Black professional joining a new team or role is to remember that regardless of your color and ethnicity, you can still find people within the team who you can gel with and with whom you share similar interests. Where possible, make a conscious effort to have an individual conversation with everyone on your team; this could be in the office or going out for a lunch. Good working relationships start at work but are often built and developed through outside engagement.

When I started my career (and some of you reading this may be familiar with debating with yourself whether to attend social gatherings at all), I felt a bit anxious about going to work socials. The thought of being in another environment where I would be forced to talk about something other than work made me feel a bit awkward. I would have to talk about myself, and I didn’t feel comfortable with sharing the details of my personal life. The pub wasn’t a place I would usually go to on the weekends, but drinks in the pub is something that is heavily tied to white British culture. I knew this would have to be something I would need to adapt to if I wanted to fit in.

To get more knowledge on networking as a professional, we caught up with the passionate and articulate Rondette Amoy Smith. Born and raised in Brooklyn with her little brother, her parents both being teachers meant that education was a really important part of Rondette’s upbringing. As an adult, Rondette studied in Trinidad for a year but also spent three years working in Hong Kong. On leaving Hong Kong, she had visited around 50 countries through activities she carried out with work. In 2017, Rondette moved to London and spent seven and a half years at Goldman Sachs before moving to Nomura to become Head of Diversity & Inclusion for EMEA.

Rondette spoke to me at length about her journey through the corporate world and offered some fantastic advice on networking, which she believes is crucial for getting to the top of your career ladder. “There’s a certain point in your career that it’s no longer about what you know, but who you know,” she says. If you’re a career professional reading this, have a think about who in your network would be able to vouch for you in terms of recommending you for higher positions and roles. If you cannot think of anyone, it may be time to start improving your networking skills at work.

Rondette describes herself as an introvert but also acknowledges the fact that as introverted or awkward a person may be, they will not be able to get far enough in the corporate world without being a good networker. “When you’re a junior in your career, it’s about proving what you know—your technical skills, enthusiasm, your depth and your knowledge—and then, when you move up, it’s about how much of every little thing you know, who you know, and how you are connecting to other people.” Rondette decided that she would teach herself the essential skills of networking through reading books and watching tutorials on YouTube.

It’s important to remember that not everyone can be good at networking, but as it is an essential skill in life, you have to make a conscious effort to practice and to learn how to do it. What I found even more fascinating in our conversation was her “board of directors.”

Rondette created her own board of directors outside work with peers she had met throughout her career. This board comprises of junior and senior roles, white men, Indian women, Chinese men that she met during her time in Hong Kong, and people from many other walks of life. Rondette clearly sees the benefit of surrounding herself with diverse people. The importance of this can be seen in recent studies, which suggest that diverse teams are 87 percent better at decision-making than less diverse teams. Teams of different genders and races, as well as an age gap of at least 20 years, were recorded as making better business decisions ²⁸.

Because of the diversity of her board, Rondette is able to gain different types of knowledge and apply it when networking in different spaces. Some of the things Rondette does to prepare for networking events include figuring out who is going to be there. This way, she can draw from her own personal skills and the attributes of her personal board of directors and decide on the specific traits she needs to exhibit at these events. One of Rondette’s biggest assets, however, is her exceptional memory. She uses this to remember the smallest things about people after their first encounter—whether it’s the name of their child, partner, or dog—as a means to build relationships. Adding a personal touch to networking is a different technique to those we’ve discussed already, but being a good networker requires you to draw on one of the tactics I mentioned earlier: being a good listener. Meeting someone who remembers the tiny details about you makes you feel like they have genuine interest in not only the things you do as an entrepreneur or professional, but also you as a person.

Being a connector, or what she refers to as a “conduit,” is another trait that Rondette displays in networking. “If I meet one person, and I think they’re super dope, and they could benefit from meeting my friend or someone I know, I’m so open to saying ‘Hey, you know, I think you should really meet so and so,’” she says. Being able to connect and collaborate in this way shows you are genuinely interested in helping the person and not only in what they could possibly do for you. In the working world, Rondette says, “Being a conduit helps to pay it forward and sideways with my peers. It shows people who are more senior than me that I have the ability to recognize intelligence, innovators, thinkers, creatives, all kinds of good qualities in people. It shows that I can recognize good talent and that I’m able to bring people together.”

Entrepreneurs and professionals who are not networking are missing out. Building a great network takes time, intention, and effort, but adopting some of these strategies will make it easier and improve your chance of success.

Digital Networking

With the rise of social media, digital platforms, and networking apps, there has never been a better opportunity to network online. These spaces have given us the opportunity to connect with individuals from across the globe.

Visibility is one of the most important aspects of networking. Staying at the forefront of someone’s mind is why some entrepreneurs are considered luckier than others. In fact, by simply being, and most importantly, staying visible, they are given more opportunities.

Platforms such as LinkedIn, Instagram, and Twitter are great for keeping your business and your name at the front of people’s minds. Regular posts on business activity, talks you may have done, and work updates help you communicate to a large number of people without having to meet them. Social media allows you to gain genuine supporters of your business or personal brand. I have often spoken to entrepreneurs who receive more support from some of their social media followers they have never met than they do from actual friends and peers. Aim to create a following and network of people who will speak about your brand positively for you.

Social media platforms also allow you to engage with people who have a keen interest in you but may not be people who you might meet at a social event; for the introverted entrepreneur who prefers not to attend social events, this could be a more preferable option. Being able to network online gives you the advantage of engaging with those who are less likely to attend a physical event but may still have some value to add to your network.

Angelica Nwandu, CEO of The Shade Room, told us that she does not enjoy networking but realizes the power of it. Angelica’s way around this was to go out and hire people who have great networking attributes, because when referring to her own networking prowess, she says, “It’s not a strong suit for me, so what I’ve done is hire people who it is a strong suit for. I have ‘personalities’ that go out there and create relationships. I also have my ad team go out to create relationships.” This tactical form of networking has seen The Shade Room create ties with leaders and celebrities such as current President Joe Biden, Lizzo, and DJ Khaled, to name a few, all of whom have personal relationships with Angelica’s staff.

We know that a combination of face-to-face and digital networking is essential for today’s Black entrepreneurs, professionals, and Black business owners, and Angelica clearly ensures that she can do both well through careful management of her and her staff’s skill sets.

On networking, Mathew Knowles added, “In my age, there wasn’t an opportunity to speak to everyone across the world. There is no excuse for your generation; you have the advantage, so take it.” He’s absolutely right. With the technology that we hold quite literally at our fingertips, we really have an opportunity to reach out to almost anyone, anywhere. So who are you online? What does your profile look like? Does it represent your values? Is the design and content consistent across your platforms? Aim to be genuine and consistent across all your platforms, and you will certainly reap the benefits.

Face-to-Face Networking

In Chapter 1, we discussed personal branding and the best ways to market yourself. Networking at events and venues is the most common type of networking.

A pause on event-based networking due to the global restrictions on movement in 2020 made businesspeople, businesses, and media companies think about new ways to network through social media or by video calling. There was a boom in multimedia platforms like Clubhouse and Lunchclub that are dedicated to making digital networking easy. Face-to-face networking in real life or on screen can also be described as a way of marketing yourself, with the main aim being to find and build new business connections and relationships.

Face-to-face networking requires a number of the skills already examined in this chapter. Confidence, for instance, is a characteristic that is more pronounced in face-to-face environments. When you go for a job interview, as much as you may be nervous, it’s important to try not to show your nerves outwardly to the interviewer. Hiring managers may sympathize with a nervous candidate but are very unlikely to hire them if a person seems like they are unable to deal with the pressure of an interview. This is not to say you can never be nervous again, but you should practice control over your nerves so that you are able to perform at your best.

As someone who now regularly speaks at events and to audiences of all different sizes, I use my nerves to help me prepare. Because I overprepare for things, people perhaps overestimate how confident I actually am. Just like an employer would favor a more confident candidate in a job interview, people naturally gravitate to confident people. A confident person is memorable. Many of you reading this have at some point been the person at an event waiting for someone to come up to you—you want to speak to people, but you’re too nervous to make any approaches, and then the anxiousness of standing by yourself while other people are in groups only adds to that pressure. Having an aim and goal of what you wish to achieve from attending the event will give you some security and a plan to fall back on, thus helping you control your nerves better and allowing you to be more confident. We all know that those who prepare and study for an exam will always have an advantage over those who just show up and take the test. “Fail to prepare, prepare to fail”—a cliché statement, but if it weren’t true, it wouldn’t be said so often, and this adage definitely applies to networking.

Preparation is key, but one thing that you can’t always prepare for is awkward conversations. With some people, you’ll start speaking and instantly hit it off, rarely even thinking about what you will say next as the conversation just flows. Whereas with other conversations, you’ll find yourself scrambling to prepare the next question in your mind as soon as you are speaking. Both situations are perfectly normal, and it’s important that when going into any networking event, you embrace it and be prepared for potential awkwardness.

Listening in face-to-face environments presents itself slightly differently than listening online. Because you are in the moment and the chance to go back over an email or message is not available, it is important to follow the conversation keenly and pick up the learnings as you go along. Paying attention and listening to others during networking will build your relationships, as well as help you spot opportunities for yourself and opportunities to help others, all while keeping the conversation flowing. When you are truly listening and paying attention, you will not need to worry about what you say next, as questions will automatically come into your mind.

For me, authenticity is the key thing to take into a networking environment; this is not to assume that everyone is not authentic or genuine, but the manner in which you may approach someone must come across as authentic.

Make Meaningful Connections

Building a strong network is strategic. Once you make the connections, how you maintain them is just as important as how you’ve acquired them.

When considering how you build your network, there are a number of components that will help you build a strong one. As a starting point, focus on the right people. As much as speaking to and handing out your business cards to everyone in sight may potentially increase the chance of you gaining a good connection, your time can be used more productively if you make meaningful connections as opposed to multiple connections. Focus on the people who you know can make a difference for you. Be deliberate about who you want to connect with, target them, and put more energy into the networks that you feel will enhance your objectives.

As Rondette Amoy Smith advocates, being a connector is essential to making lasting, meaningful connections. Utilize your social media to build your network and check out who the people you admire are following as a way to meet new people. Use these platforms to connect and stay engaged with people already in your network. It may be a simple comment on a picture or a reply to a post, but doing these small things will keep you at the forefront of your connection’s mind.

As well as discussing personal branding with India Gary-Martin in Chapter 1, we also spoke about building a network. India feels that it’s disingenuous to wait until you need something before messaging a contact. She explains the importance of following up quickly. She says, “Building a network is about building your relationships, and not necessarily worrying about what you might need it for, but also treating every single person that you meet as important. When I was getting business cards, I would always email the people on every single card I received to say, ‘Hey, nice to meet you. Let’s keep in touch,’ because it means that I can go back to them later and say, ‘Oh, remember we met at this place.’”

Remember the analogy Mark from SliderCuts used—seeds need to be watered in order to grow, and the action of “following up” is the water to the seed of networking. Asmau Ahmed, founder of Plum Perfect, also gave some great advice on how she built her network. Asmau has led corporate strategy and digital innovation in a number of industries, including financial services and consumer retail. With experience in both corporate and entrepreneurial leadership, Asmau honed her skills in assessing the business viability and risk profile and in leading innovation in enterprise, finance, and technology. Being one of a small pool of Black women to have raised more than $1 million in VC funding is indicative of the fact that Asmau must have some enviable networking skills. For Asmau to be able to raise this amount of money, she would have to have met and gelled with the right investors. Like so many of the entrepreneurs we’ve spoken to, Asmau considers herself an introvert. Speaking on networking, she says, “I like my personal space and time. Just going out and meeting people makes me nervous.”

Discussing how she uses her digital skills to make connections, Asmau says that she utilizes emails more than anything. She walks us through how she managed to build and maintain great relationships with some of her investors. “I have a networking spreadsheet which I keep track of as much as a sales log. This sheet can include some of the investors I’ve met, the dates I’ve reached out to them, as well as the people that introduced them to me. I always remember to say thank you to people, and always think of ways that I can circle back and say ‘hey.’ The sheet will also include how conversations have gone, whether it went well or bad, if it was a great event, and also the next steps I hope to make.”

As you can see, there are many ways to stay organized and build a strong network, use the tools around you that you feel most comfortable with, and remember to stay in contact as much as possible but ensuring it’s not too overwhelming when doing so.

Byron Cole on Being a People Person

Byron Cole is an award-winning serial entrepreneur, public speaker, investor, philanthropist, and mentor to entrepreneurs and students. He runs the BLC Group, an umbrella company that looks after his many business interests.³⁰ Byron speaks about how his trait of being a people person has helped him when networking: “It doesn’t matter whether it’s the janitor or the loo man [plumber], I will talk to anybody. I love talking and I love people. I don’t care who you are or what you do, I will talk to you.”

Ronke Lawal on Building Relationships

In 2004, Ronke started her PR business and, as part of her 10-year anniversary, she rebranded to launch Ariatu PR, a public relations agency that is geared toward representing clients in a variety of industries, including entertainment, fashion, lifestyle and beauty, food, and luxury goods. She has a wealth of PR and marketing communications experience in the high-growth start-up sector, as well as working for corporate clients in a range of industries. Ronke speaks on how building relationships has helped her with networking: “Networking is central to building relationships and building community. I’ve got social media channels that I use for myself and another for my business and use them all very intentionally. I use them to attract not only my network, but also build relationships offline.”

Herman Bulls on Connecting

Herman Bulls, founder of JLL’s highly acclaimed Public Institutions Business Unit, shares why connecting is his key: “Networking is something you should think about substituting with ‘connecting.’ Most people look at networking as transactional; I propose connecting with people. Connecting is when you will do something for someone without regard to what you will receive in return. If you can say, ‘instead of me being the sponge, I’m going to be the giver,’ you will reap the benefits of this. If you connect consistently, over 50 years like I have, you will end up with a network that is very powerful and very strong.”

Glenda McNeal on Being Strategic

In 2020, Glenda McNeal made history as the first Black woman to be on American Express’s executive committee. President of Strategic Partnerships, Glenda has served at Amex for more than 30 years leading significant partnerships and negotiations with key clients including Delta, Marriott, Hilton, PayPal, and Amazon for co-branded credit cards and marketing initiatives.

Glenda spoke about being more targeted and strategic when looking to network:

“When you network and you’re trying to find role models or mentors, it’s important to know what it is you want. What is it that you’re looking for out of that network? What is it that you’re looking for out of that mentoring relationship? You want to network with that person because you think that they have shared values and that they are on a path that you’d like to be on. Focus on people who are like-minded, who you admire, and who might serve to be a role model for you. Focus more on those relationships.”

Next Steps and Reflection

• What part of networking do you find the hardest?
• What steps can you take to overcome this?
• What interpersonal skills do you need to improve on?
• What advice can you take from the chapter to better build your network and the relationships within it?