No kidding! Take your seats, everyone, so we can get started. If you haven’t a clue what is being discussed, you need to put this book down. Go back to the book store and buy Jeffrey Richter’s CLR via C#, Fourth Edition (Microsoft Press, 2012). Really, you need it anyway. Then after you read the Foreword, you may join us!
If you’re short on time, here is the CliffsNotes version: in Jeff’s previous two books, he vowed to never write another one. Well, here we all are again. No more empty promises. Jeff will probably write another book. After so many years of his lies about stopping, I can no longer support them. We are all here for the intervention. How much more can be said, right? I mean, aren’t there literally thousands of pages of stuff written on this already? Jeff claims that because Maarten came up with the initial research and prose, Jeff was cowriting the book, so it doesn’t count. We all see through this ruse. This is not our first rodeo.
Maybe you all can’t appreciate Jeff’s humble origins. He was never fully understood by his family. His parents didn’t believe there was a future in computers and hoped he would “get over it” and find a real career. When he quit his first job to write a book, they could not believe you could make a real living if you didn’t wear a tie every day. His mother never got over the fact that he wore jeans to work. His grandmother held a book of his in her hand and then decided that “windows” meant he dressed the mannequins at Macy’s. Like he was an expert on shopping and merchandising at the mall. I am not kidding; this is true. Let me just tell you something Jeffrey is not an expert on, and that is malls and shopping. So maybe that is why he must continually write, explaining over and over the importance of technology—this is just to justify his life to his family. It is the only explanation I can come up with.
The amazing thing is this new book does have stuff about the Windows Store! His grandma would be so excited—finally, she can go shopping for something in a store that has to do with Windows. Hopefully that will provide the validation he needs.
I will warn you. Jeff is becoming a bit of an old timer. Oh, it’s true. While I was trying to understand this book (which of course I don’t), he couldn’t stop himself from harkening back to the day. When programs were real programs. They did meaningful things, like run medical software and financial software. Now we have applications and even that word is too complex, so we call them apps. They are available for $1.49, and they do things like pass gas or make a flashlight. There is nothing mission critical about this. Jeff feels a little like a sellout—with all his skills, the best he can do is try to create an app that will outsell Pet Rescue. He then talked about how this book will make programming so easy. Windows 8.1 is so clean and smooth. There is not the same level of intensity to programming for it.
Although, between you and me, there is a little secret that should be shared. Under full NDA, just because we are friends. Jeff wrote a few of these apps for the Windows Store, and they were rejected. So maybe making a flashlight is not so easy, huh?
Really, this whole book thing is not even necessary. I mean, now you can hear him with WintellectNOW’s on-demand video training. It is like a lullaby—you can turn on Jeff’s videos anytime you need the comfort of another human’s voice. Reading is just a silly old-school skill that we used to need. Now we have the Internet and video feeds. So whenever you have issues with your code, you can invite Jeffrey into your office for a little lesson. If you happen to need a nap at the same time, well napping is one of the 7 habits of highly effective people.
So, with Windows 8.1 released, a new paradigm is in place. Jeffrey is clearly in front of this situation. He has his fingers on the pulse (or at least the touch-sensitive screen) of this situation. Who knows, someday he may even get me to update to this new version of Windows.
I would like to close with some thoughts from some old (I mean, longtime) friends, his business partners and fellow Wintellectuals.
John Robbins says:
Jeffrey and I go way back. Back to the time when Steve Ballmer had hair and modern applications used this amazing technology called a “Windows message.” When Jeffrey started development with Windows, you were doing really well if you could get two programs running at the same time. After some detours through Windows XP and the like, you could run dozens of applications concurrently. Windows 8.1 brings us to the future of modern applications where you can run two side by side.
Jeff Prosise says:
One of our favorite Jeffrey-isms: “This code is so bad, I feel sorry for the compiler that has to compile it!”
Jeffrey has an admitted inability to build user interfaces. Ergo Jeffrey-ism #2: “There is no UI problem that can’t be solved with a command prompt.”
And in closing, Mark Russinovich, author of the cyber thriller Zero Day, says:
I have known Jeff since 1997 when he heckled me during a talk I was giving. He had a point, though, so we’ve been friends ever since. Jeff has come a long way since I first started mentoring him and he continues to impress me with his ability to solve Portal 2 puzzles.
I hope you all enjoy this book! I am patiently awaiting the return of my husband.
Kristin Trace (Jeff’s wife)
October 2013
