NOTES
Chapter 1
1. Pew Research Center, Raising Kids and Running a Household: How Working Parents Share the Load,” Social and Demographic Trends, 2015, http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2015/11/04/raising-kids-and-running-a-household-how-working-parents-share-the-load/; Office for National Statistics, Families and the Labour Market, England: 2017, https://www.ons.gov.uk/employmentandlabourmarket/peopleinwork/employmentandemployeetypes/articles/familiesandthelabourmarketengland/2017#employment-rate-for-mothers-increased-by-118-percentage-points-over-the-past-2-decades; and G. Cory and A. Stirling, Who’s Breadwinning in Europe? A Comparative Analysis of Maternal Breadwinning in Great Britain and Germany (London: Institute for Public Policy Research, 2015), https://www.ippr.org/files/publications/pdf/whos-breadwinning-in-europe-oct2015.pdf.
2. A. Shimazu, K. Shimada, and I. Watai, “Work–Family Balance and Well-Being among Japanese Dual-Earner Couples: A Spillover–Crossover Perspective,” in Contemporary Occupational Health Psychology: Global Perspectives on Research and Practice, vol. 3, ed. L. Stavroula and R. R. Sinclair (New York: Wiley, 2014), 84–96.
3. S. Meers and J. Strober, Getting to 50/50: How Working Parents Can Have It All (Jersey City, NJ: Viva Editions, 2013).
4. P. Amato and F. Rivera, “Paternal Involvement and Children’s Behavior Problems,” Journal of Marriage and Family 61, no. 2 (1999): 375–384; and E. Cooksey and M. Fondell, “Spending Time with His Kids: Effects of Family Structure on Fathers’ and Children’s Lives,” Journal of Marriage and Family 58, no. 3 (1996): 693–707.
5. N. Chethik, VoiceMale: What Husbands Really Think about Their Marriages, Their Wives, Sex, Housework, and Commitment (New York: Simon & Schuster, 2006).
6. L. Price Cooke, “‘Doing’ Gender in Context: Household Bargaining and Risk of Divorce in Germany and the United States,” American Journal of Sociology 112, no. 2 (2006): 447–472.
7. US Department of Labor, Bureau of Labor Statistics, Number of Jobs, Labor Market Experience, and Earnings Growth Among Americans at 50: Results from a Longitudinal Study, news release, 2017, https://www.bls.gov/news.release/pdf/nlsoy.pdf; J. Meister, “The Future of Work: Job Hopping Is the ‘New Normal’ for Millennials,” Forbes, August 14, 2012, https://www.forbes.com/sites/jeannemeister/2012/08/14/the-future-of-work-job-hopping-is-the-new-normal-for-millennials/#4fc9009713b8; and A. Doyle, Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS): There’s No Better Place Than the BLS to Explore Job and Career Information, https://www.thebalance.com/how-often-do-people-change-jobs-2060467.
8. A. Gini, My Job, My Self: Work and the Creation of the Modern Individual (New York: Routledge, 2000).
9. E. Erikson, Childhood and Society (New York: W. W. Norton & Co, 1950).
10. D. Levinson, The Seasons of a Man’s Life (New York: Ballantine Books, 1978); D. Levinson, The Seasons of a Woman’s Life (New York: Ballantine Books, 1997); and R. Kegan, The Evolving Self: Problem and Process in Human Development (Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press, 1982).
11. J. E. Pixley, “Career Prioritizing in Dual-Earner Couples,” in Women, Feminism, and Femininity in the 21st Century: American and French Perspectives, ed. B. Mousli and E. A. Roustang-Stoller (New York: Palgrave Macmillan, 2009), 79–105.
12. S. Stossel, My Age of Anxiety: Fear, Hope, Dread, and the Search for Peace of Mind (New York: Knopf, 2014).
Chapter 2
1. R. M. Kreider and R. Ellis, “Number, Timing, and Duration of Marriages and Divorces: 2009,” Household Economic Studies, US Census Bureau, Current Population Reports, 2011, https://www.census.gov/prod/2011pubs/p70-125.pdf; and D. Rotz, “Why Have Divorce Rates Fallen? The Role of Women’s Age at Marriage,” Journal of Human Resources 51, no. 4 (Fall 2016): 961–1002.
2. R. Kegan and L. Lahey, Immunity to Change: How to Overcome It and Unlock the Potential in Yourself and Your Organization (Boston: Harvard Business Press, 2009).
3. S. Iyengar, The Art of Choosing (Boston: Little, Brown, 2010).
4. D. W. Winnicott, The Collected Works of D. W. Winnicott, ed. L. Caldwell and H. Taylor Robinson (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2017); and J. Bowlby, A Secure Base: Clinical Applications of Attachment Theory (Abington, UK: Routledge, 1988).
5. J. Gottman, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert (New York: Harmony Books, 2000).
6. Gottman, The Seven Principles.
7. T. N. Radbury and F. D. Fincham, “Attributions in Marriage: Review and Critique,” Psychological Bulletin 107, no. 1 (1990): 3–33.
8. J. H. Fowler and N. A. Christakis, “Cooperative Behavior Cascades in Human Social Networks,” Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America 107, no. 12 (2010): 5334–5338.
9. J. M. Gottman, Why Marriages Succeed or Fail: And How You Can Make Yours Last (New York: Simon & Schuster, 1994).
Chapter 3
1. K. Weisshaar, “From Opt Out to Blocked Out: The Challenges for Labor Market Re-entry After Family-Related Employment Lapses,” American Sociological Review 83, no. 1 (2018): 34–60; S. A. Hewlett, L. Sherbin, and D. Forster, “Off-Ramps and On-Ramps Revisited,” Harvard Business Review, June 2010; S. A. Hewlett et al., Off-Ramps and On-Ramps Revisited (New York: Center for Work-Life Policy, 2010).
2. P. Stone and M. Lovejoy, “Fast-Track Women and the ‘Choice’ to Stay Home,” Annals of the American Academy of Political and Social Science 66 (2004): 75–79; Hewlett, Sherbin, and Forster, “Off-Ramps and On-Ramps Revisited”; Hewlett et al., Off-Ramps and On-Ramps Revisited.
3. P. Stone, Opting Out? Why Women Really Quit Careers and Head Home (Berkeley and Los Angeles: University of California Press, 2007).
4. S. A. Hewlett and C. L. Buck, “Off-Ramps and On-Ramps: Keeping Talented Women on the Road to Success,” Harvard Business Review, March 2005.
5. A. Crittenden, The Price of Motherhood: Why the Most Important Job in the World Is Still the Least Valued (New York: Metropolitan Books, 2001).
6. D. Kahneman, Thinking, Fast and Slow (New York: Macmillan, 2011).
7. Weisshaar, “From Opt Out to Blocked Out.”
8. K. Weisshaar, “Stay-at-Home Moms Are Half as Likely to Get a Job Interview as Moms Who Got Laid Off,” hbr.org, February 22, 2018, https://hbr.org/2018/02/stay-at-home-moms-are-half-as-likely-to-get-a-job-interview-as-moms-who-got-laid-off.
9. P. Stone, Opting Out?
10. Hewlett and Buck, “Off-Ramps and On-Ramps.”
11. J. Brines, “Economic Dependency, Gender, and the Division of Labor at Home,” American Journal of Sociology 100, no. 3 (1994): 652–688.
12. S. Meers and J. Strober, Getting to 50/50: How Working Parents Can Have It All (Jersey City, NJ: Viva Editions, 2013); and S. Sandberg, Lean In: Women, Work and the Will to Lead (London: W.H. Allen, 2013).
13. Pew Research Center, Raising Kids and Running a Household: How Working Parents Share the Load,” Social and Demographic Trends, 2015, http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2015/11/04/raising-kids-and-running-a-household-how-working-parents-share-the-load/.
14. Office for National Statistics, Women Shoulder the Responsibility of “Unpaid Work,” Employment and Labour Market Report, United Kingdom, 2016, https://www.ons.gov.uk/employmentandlabourmarket/peopleinwork/earningsandworkinghours/articles/womenshouldertheresponsibilityofunpaidwork/2016-11-10.
15. T. Dufu, Drop the Ball: Achieving More by Doing Less (New York: Flatiron Books, 2017).
Chapter 4
1. I. Padavic, R. Ely, and E. Reid, “Explaining the Persistence of Gender Inequality: The Work-Family Narrative as a Social Defense against the 24/7 Work Culture,” Administrative Science Quarterly (forthcoming).
2. S. Iyengar, The Art of Choosing (Boston: Little, Brown, 2010).
3. G. Ramey and V. A. Ramey, The Rug Rat Race (Cambridge, MA: National Bureau of Economic Research, 2009).
4. The NICHD Early Child Care Research Network, ed., Child Care and Child Development: Results from the NICHD Study of Early Child Care and Youth Development (New York: Guilford, 2005).
5. J. Bowlby, A Secure Base: Clinical Applications of Attachment Theory (Abington, UK: Routledge, 1988).
Chapter 5
1. C. G. Jung, The Collected Works, vol. 6, Psychological Types (London: Routledge and Kegan Paul, 1971).
2. A. Van Gennep, Les rites de passage (1909; Paris: Émile Nourry, 1964); V. Turner, “Betwixt and Between: The Liminal Period in Rites of Passage,” Proceedings of the American Ethnological Society, Symposium on New Approaches to the Study of Religion (1967): 4–20.
3. H. Ibarra and O. Obodaru, “Betwixt and Between Identities: Liminal Experience in Contemporary Careers,” Research in Organizational Behavior 35 (2016): 47–64.
4. W. Bridges, Transitions: Making Sense of Life’s Changes, 2nd ed. (Cambridge, MA: Da Capo, 2004), 142.
5. H. Ibarra, Working Identity: Unconventional Strategies for Reinventing Your Career (Boston: Harvard Business Press, 2004).
6. US Census Bureau, “Number of Divorced Individuals in the United States in 2016, by Age and Sex,” Statistics Portal, https://www.statista.com/statistics/687930/number-of-divorced-individuals-by-age-and-sex-us/; United Kingdom Office for National Statistics, “Divorces in England and Wales,” 2017, https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/divorce/bulletins/divorcesinenglandandwales/2016; OECD Family Database, “Family Dissolution and Children,” 2015, https://www.oecd.org/els/family/SF_3_2_Family_dissolution_children.pdf.
7. C. Dweck, Mindset: Changing the Way You Think to Fulfil Your Potential (London: Hachette UK, 2017).
8. C. R. Knee, “Implicit Theories of Relationships: Assessment and Prediction of Romantic Relationship Initiation, Coping, and Longevity,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 74 (1998): 360–370.
9. E. J. Finkel, J. L. Burnette, and L. E. Scissors, “Vengefully Ever After: Destiny Beliefs, State Attachment Anxiety, and Forgiveness,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 92, no. 5 (2007): 871–886.
Chapter 6
1. J. L. Petriglieri and O. Obodaru, “Secure-Base Relationships as Drivers of Professional Identity Development in Dual-Career Couples,” Administrative Science Quarterly (2018), https://doi.org/10.1177%2F0001839218783174.
2. J. Bowlby, A Secure Base: Clinical Applications of Attachment Theory (London: Routledge, 1988), 62.
3. J. Bowlby, Attachment and Loss, vol. 1, Attachment (1969; repr. London: Hogarth Press/Institute of Psychoanalysis, 1982).
4. E. J. Finkel, The All-or-Nothing Marriage: How the Best Marriages Work (New York: Penguin, 2017).
Chapter 7
1. E. Galinksy, Ask the Children: What America’s Children Really Think about Working Parents (Darby, PA: Diane Publishing Company, 1999).
2. R. Clayton, “Can You Afford to Change Your Career?” Harvard Business Review digital article, 2018, https://hbr.org/2018/08/can-you-afford-to-change-your-career.
3. R. M. Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet, trans. M. D. Herter Norton (New York: Vintage Books, 1929), 34.
Chapter 8
1. L. Gratton and A. Scott, The 100-Year Life: Living and Working in an Age of Longevity (London and New York: Bloomsbury Business, 2017).
2. J. Oeppen and J. Vaupel, “Broken Limits to Life Expectancy,” Science 295 (2002): 1029–1031; Gratton and Scott, The 100-Year Life.
3. OECD Family Database, “Age of Mothers at Childbirth and Age-Specific Fertility,” 2018, OECD Social Policy Division, Directorate of Employment, Labour and Social Affairs, https://www.oecd.org/els/soc/SF_2_3_Age_mothers_childbirth.pdf; and Y. S. Khandwala et al., “The Age of Fathers in the USA Is Rising: An Analysis of 168,867,480 Births from 1972 to 2015,” Human Reproduction 32, no. 10 (2017): 2110–2116.
4. B. Schwartz et al., “Maximizing Versus Satisficing: Happiness Is a Matter of Choice,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 83, no. 5 (2002): 1178–1197; S. S. Iyengar, R. E. Wells, and B. Schwartz,” Doing Better but Feeling Worse,” Psychological Science 17, no. 2 (2006): 143–150; and A. Roets, B. Schwartz, and Y. Guan, “The Tyranny of Choice: A Cross-Cultural Investigation of Maximizing-Satisficing Effects on Well-Being,” Judgment and Decision Making 7, no. 6 (2012): 689–704.
5. D. W. Winnicott, Playing and Reality (London: Tavistock Publications, 1971).
6. G. Sheehy, Passages: Predictable Crises of Adult Life (New York: E.P. Dutton, 1974).
7. E. Finkle, The All-or-Nothing Marriage: How the Best Marriages Work (New York: Dutton, 2017).
8. S. M. Drigotas et al., “Close Partner as Sculptor of the Ideal Self: Behavioral Affirmation and the Michelangelo Phenomenon,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 77 (1999): 293–323.
9. A. H. Maslow, “A Theory of Human Motivation,” Psychological Review 50, no. 4 (1943): 370–396.
10. Renee Stepler, “Led by Baby Boomers, Divorce Rates Climb for America’s 50+ Population,” Pew Research Center, March 9, 2017, http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2017/03/09/led-by-baby-boomers-divorce-rates-climb-for-americas-50-population/.
11. D. Bair, Calling It Quits: Late-Life Divorce and Starting Over (New York: Random House, 2007).
12. M. J. Rosenfeld, “Who Wants the Breakup? Gender and Breakup in Heterosexual Couples,” in Social Networks and the Life Course, ed. D. Alwin, D. Felmlee, and D. Kreager (New York: Springer, 2018), 221–243.
13. A. Wittenberg-Cox, Late Love: Mating in Maturity (Carlsbad, CA: Motivational Press, 2018).
Chapter 9
1. H. Ibarra and J. L. Petriglieri, “Identity Work and Play,” Journal of Organizational Change Management 23, no. 1 (2010): 10–25.
Chapter 10
1. E. Fromm, The Art of Loving (New York: Harper & Row, 1956).
2. S. Freud, Civilization and its Discontents (1930; repr. New York: W.W. Norton and Company, 1962), 48.
Appendix
1. J. E. Pixley, “Differentiating Careers from Jobs in the Search for Dual-Career Couples,” Sociological Perspectives 52 (2009): 363–384.
2. R. Rapoport and R. N. Rapoport, Dual-Career Families Re-examined: New Integrations of Work and Family (London: M. Robertson, 1976).
3. B. G. Glaser and A. Strauss, The Discovery of Grounded Theory: Strategies for Qualitative Research (Chicago: Aldine de Gruyter, 1967).
4. R. Atkinson, The Life Story Interview (Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage, 1998)
5. A. Strauss and J. M. Corbin, “Grounded Theory Research: Procedures, Canons, and Evaluative Criteria,” Qualitative Sociology 63 (1990): 284–297.