Chapter 3

First Impressions Are Lasting Impressions

Take five. Or seven. Or 30. No, I'm not talking about putting down this ground-breaking book to take a rest break, fix a sandwich, or watch Dr. Phil. I'm referring to the number of seconds it takes for someone to size you up on a first meeting—and make a fairly accurate assessment—according to numerous research studies.

People can absorb an enormous amount of visual information when they encounter other people for the first time. This was a lifesaving capability in earlier times when people needed to protect themselves from neighboring tribes. In the deep, primitive recesses of the brain, they developed a way to quickly determine friend or foe before wielding their prehistoric clubs. Should you invite Cro-Magnon Man back to the cave for a wooly mammoth burger or bash him over the head with a club? Determining perceived affinity or distrust of an individual within seconds was critical. Simply put: Eat or be eaten.

First impressions are surprisingly accurate and can make or break your job interview, your Karaoke performance, or even a first date. Various research studies by social psychologists have found that strangers will form an opinion of you within 2 to 30 seconds of meeting you. Although you might not like someone sizing you up before interviewing you, it is human nature. So, use this information to your benefit if you want to be crazy good before the interviewing process even begins.

In fact, 10—count 'em, 10—psychological judgments are made during a first impression, according to William Thourby in his book, You Are What You Wear, including success level, economic status, integrity, education level, social position, level of sophistication, economic heritage, social heritage, educational heritage, and moral character. So much information is absorbed in so little time.

We immediately judge people based on their outward appearance. Are they attractive in terms of personal grooming, and are they wearing sharp, contemporary, appropriate clothing? Do their body language and facial expressions convey confidence? Are they friendly? Are they likeable? Would we want to associate with them?

Look at the Research

Many well-known academic research studies support the accuracy of first impressions. In 1993, Nalini Ambady and Robert Rosenthal of the Harvard Department of Psychology demonstrated that it takes only a few seconds to make a deep and lasting first impression. They recorded 2-, 6-, and 10-second video clips of individual professors, and then asked a group of students to watch the clips and evaluate each professor.

Ambady and Rosenthal compared the evaluations of the students who watched these clips with the evaluations of people who had substantial interactions with those professors. The similarities were amazing. They found that the ratings of complete strangers, based on very thin and short slices of behavior, from 2 to 10 seconds long, accurately predicted the evaluations of people who had interacted regularly with the professors.

Robert Cialdini, Ph.D., of the University of Arizona and author of the best-selling book, Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion (first published in 1984), showed that people use shortcuts when judging people. The most common shortcut is looking good equals good. Translation: If you look good, you must be good.

Looking good gets you some breaks in life. Cialdini found in mock jury trials that if you are being sued, you will pay much less to the person who sues you if you look good. Conversely, if you are the one who is suing and you don't look good, the judge will award you less money. What's the lesson? Look good.

Exceptions to the Rule

Once the first impression is formed, it's very difficult to reverse, but it's not entirely impossible. Take Scottish singer Susan Boyle's legendary audition on the TV show, Britain's Got Talent, in April 2009. When frumpy Boyle marched on stage with her frizzy, shapeless hair and plain gold-colored dress, the audience and judges had no idea what they were about to experience. Judge Simon Cowell inquired about Boyle's age, to which she placed her hands on her undulating hips and responded, “I'm 47, and that's just one side of me.” (Note: Susan's unpolished appearance and hip-swinging movements are examples of crazy bad behavior.)

Snickering audience members rolled their eyes, preparing for a total train wreck. But their jaws dropped instantly when Susan opened her mouth and belted out I Dreamed a Dream from Les Misérables. At the end of the song, judge Piers Morgan remarked, “Without a doubt, that's the biggest surprise I've had in three years on the show.” Boyle's performance was viewed some 300 million times on YouTube, and she became a global singing sensation within days.

The adage “You can't judge a book by its cover” rings true in the case of Landau Eugene Murphy, Jr., a 36-year-old car washer from Logan, West Virginia. Murphy's audition for TV's America's Got Talent aired June 22, 2011. Before Murphy broke into song, viewers watched a video clip of him washing cars at an auto dealership. As he soaped up a car with a big sponge, he joked that he didn't want to see any more BF Goodrich tires because he had it up to here with bubbles, motioning to his neck. “It's time to go somewhere and do something else,” he said.

Murphy, a mild-mannered African-American male wearing baggy jeans and flowing dreadlocks, was reprimanded by Piers Morgan for chewing gum at his on-stage audition in front of the panel of four judges and a packed auditorium. (Note: Under these circumstances, chewing gum is a crazy bad behavior.) Without breaking eye contact, Murphy heeded Morgan's advice and, with a little smirk on his face, removed the gum from his mouth and stuffed it into his pants pocket.

The judges were unimpressed with Murphy's appearance and did not expect much from him in the way of talent. Then, Landau wowed the full house by nailing a perfect-pitch rendition of Frank Sinatra's I've Got You Under My Skin. The surprised judges unanimously voted Murphy—who “never auditioned for anything or anyone” in his life—through to the second round of auditions in Las Vegas.

After Murphy's performance, comedian Howie Mandel, one of the judges on the panel, said, “The performance was such a surprise…the music…compared to the look,” a statement that prompted uproarious laughter from the audience. Murphy said that's precisely why he selected the Sinatra tune. Murphy was an exception to the rule. He knew he was perceived in a certain way, and he deliberately selected a Rat Pack song that did not fit his stereotype, so he would completely shock the judges and audience.

Murphy's audition video became an Internet sensation, and each week fans continued to watch him on TV and view videos of his performances as he kept advancing in the competition. On September 15, 2011, Murphy was crowned as the winner of America's Got Talent, and he received a $1 million prize and a Las Vegas headlining contract. The next day, he stopped by Good Day LA, a weekday news-talk show on FOX, and told viewers that he planned to use the money to purchase health insurance and start college funds for his three children, further cementing his amiable, down-to-earth charm in the hearts of his fans nationwide.

When you interview for a job, you can also apply the “exception to the rule” example by showing another side of yourself that contrasts with people's perception of you. If you are a formal, academic type, you can show your humorous, playful, or less formal side. The distinct contrast is an example of crazy good behavior. I am a good example of this tactic. My colorful Hawaiian-print shirts, which I wear when presenting throughout the year—in sweltering hot summers and frigid cold winters—have become my signature look. This attire is in sharp contrast with my serious academic role at Michigan State University (MSU), in which most people expect me to wear more conservative clothing.

Although Susan Boyle and Landau Eugene Murphy, Jr., are exceptions to the rule in the entertainment world, there are many other everyday examples that illustrate this point.

Look around you. Have you have noticed a shy, nervous-looking individual who can get up in front of a large audience, speak from the heart, and wow everyone in the room? Or the introvert who rarely chimes in until his or her values are being overridden and then stands tall and rallies the organization to do what is right? Although the adage “you can't judge a book by its cover” generally holds true, there are always exceptions.

The Rating Game

If you were the interviewer, how would you rate the following candidates on the Psychotron, who are applying for a position at your company? Some of these examples are strange but true.

• A woman wearing a blue blazer and matching skirt, conservative shoes, simple jewelry, and toting a sleek leather portfolio of work samples, arrived late for the interview and apologized for being stuck in a traffic jam.
• A young man wearing a bright blue Mohawk, a soul patch, and sporting a pierced tongue and long purple fingernails, jokingly told the interviewer not to “bust his chops.”
• A clean-shaven man with a tidy haircut showed up 20 minutes early for his interview, wearing a pressed golf shirt, khaki pants, and leather loafers. He waited patiently in the reception area until the interviewer appeared. Then he stood, smiled, introduced himself, and gave the interviewer a firm handshake.
• A young woman wearing heavy make-up, a low-cut red sweater (overflowing with cleavage), a short skirt, stiletto heels, and lots of chunky jewelry was informed that the interviewer was running behind schedule. The receptionist asked if she'd like coffee and donuts while waiting. She responded, “Yeah. Them are good.”
• An impeccably groomed man wearing a navy blue suit, dress shirt, a red “power” tie, and polished shoes arrived early and conducted business on his cell phone while waiting for his interview appointment.
• A sharply dressed female candidate wondered aloud to staff members why anyone would want to take a job here.
• A male applicant, who answered his cell phone during the interview, told the person on the other end that he couldn't talk right now because he was in an interview, and then he proceeded to talk anyway (as he got up from his chair and paced around the interviewer's office).
• A woman, who had perused the company's website, commented that she could bring some expertise to the company's newest contract negotiation, based on her past job experience.
• A male candidate indicated that he needed to speak with his mother to make sure he had mentioned all of his qualifications.
• A female applicant, who arrived one day early for her interview because she was so eager, asked if she could help out since she was there anyway.

Rate the Behavior

Stereotypes? Yes, but there's something to be said for stereotypes. The term means a commonly held notion or opinion of a group of people based on an oversimplification of observed behavior. A job candidate who dresses professionally and exudes confidence is making a serious effort to make a favorable impression. In contrast, candidates in casual attire are often viewed as possessing a lax attitude about work. This underscores the tenet that if you look good, you are good. So, if you look professional, you are professional. If you look casual, you are not serious about working.

Take, for example, a young man from California who interviewed for the MSU medical school wearing flip flops…in Michigan…in January. Even though he had impressive academic credentials and the right letters of recommendation, he blew his chances because his bare feet were a distraction during the interview. The interviewer was focused on the interviewee's lack of attention to wearing the proper attire, in addition to his rather gnarly-looking toenails.

The expression “clothes make the man and the woman” really rings true for job interviews. You can dress the part of a marketing director by buying a new suit, wearing appropriate colors, wearing polished shoes, making sure your hair is in place, getting a manicure, and wearing tasteful jewelry. When you upgrade your appearance, there is a greater likelihood of being hired and an 8 to 20 percent higher projected salary as a result of your upgraded look. Go with recommended dress standards and then personalize your look with a unique pin, brooch, tie, or scarf—nothing outlandish, but something eye-catching that makes you stand out as the unique individual that you are.

Look in the mirror. Are you wearing the appropriate clothing for your scheduled interview? Are you well groomed? Do you have good eye contact and a pleasant smile? Fortunately, you can transform a mediocre appearance into a crazy good one.

Preparation Is Key

Interviewing. Just the thought of it produces nervousness and anxiety. To reduce your pre-interview jitters, devise an interview strategy that will enable you to put your best foot forward. Collectively, your clothing, grooming, body language, and handshake must convey confidence, integrity, and consistency.

Visit your prospective employer's website and learn as much as you can about the company. Do a dry run by driving your car or taking the train or a bus to the job interview site, so you're familiar with the route on the big day, and you know how much travel time is required. Rehearse interview questions with your friends. Practice facial expressions, body language, and try on several interview outfits before you decide on the perfect one.

Your handshake is important, too. Nobody wants to touch a limp, clammy hand. Practice a firm handshake, and hold it for a couple of seconds. If you have a tendency to have sweaty palms, always dry off your hands before your interview. Carry a small hand towel if you have a chronic sweat problem. And, don't frighten off the interviewer with foul breath. Brush your teeth and take a breath mint before you enter the interview arena.

Do not sit down until you are offered a chair. Then, sit tall with squared up shoulders and try to occupy as much space in the chair as possible. Don't be a shrinking violet with a bowed head, no eye contact, and slouching shoulders. By leaving a timid impression, a potential employer will not feel confident about hiring you to tackle assignments that require some chutzpah.

An introduction to someone or your entrance into a meeting or panel interview should convey friendliness. Create a strong likeability factor. Companies hire people they know and like.

Experienced interviewers can smell fear, anxiousness, and, excuse my French, bullshit. The best policy is to just be you, but not “too” you. If you are usually a laid-back person, kick it up a notch, so you do not appear to lack energy or be complacent. If you are normally high strung, try to relax, so you do not resemble a nervous poodle.

The only thing you can do is tell your story easily, effectively, and clearly to influence a positive first impression. Highlight your skills and abilities by saying, “I'm happy to interview for this position, and here are three things I can bring to this job.”

When meeting several people at one time, such as during a panel interview, try to involve everyone in the discussion. Direct your comments or questions to all participants, so they can see your sincere interest. Avoid talking about religion, politics, or personal family matters. Only talk about family matters if the interviewer(s) is the first to bring up the subject area, and then you should still exercise caution.

Get Ready to “Act Out”

You probably have heard the term “act out” used to define the release of out-of-control aggressive or sexual impulses to gain relief from tension or anxiety. Young mothers usually say their children are acting out when the little rug rats are having tantrums and are lying on the floor, kicking and screaming.

In this book, the ACT Out strategy is a positive tool for dealing with interview-induced stress. It helps relieve job applicants of the tension and anxiety associated with the dreaded interview process.

It is time to dig in and learn about the ACT Out model to prepare yourself for interviewing successfully, whether it is for admission to a highly competitive school or program, your first job out of college, a career change, or a high-level management position.

The three stages in the ACT Out model are:

Chapter 4 will focus on taking inventory of the skills, strengths, and experiences that you bring to the position in question. Specifically, here are some of the key areas that will be addressed:

• What questions should you ask—or not ask—of yourself as well as the interviewer?
• How do you make your top characteristics stand out from other candidates?
• How do you use the rule of three?
• How can you use simple mnemonics to remember what you want to showcase in the interview?
• What is your background and history?
• What is your personal philosophy?
• What makes you unique?