CHAPTER 3

Personalismo: The Character of the Leader

I WAS A YOUNG LEADER working as the executive director of Mi Casa Women’s Center when my mentor Bernie Valdez showed me, through his example and extraordinary life, how personalismo was a powerful determinant in leading people. Like many early Latino leaders, Bernie didn’t read leadership books. He earned respect because of the kind of person he was and by the way he valued and validated everyone.

The first time I picked up Bernie for our monthly lunch, I expected his home to mirror his stature in the community. Much later, Bernie would have the Colorado Hispanic Heritage Center and a public library named after him. Yet he lived in a little house behind the stadium where the Broncos played football. It was the house where he and Dora had raised their children. He lived simply and modestly, much like the people he led.

Bernie had worked in the sugar beet fields and been a union organizer. By the time we were having lunch together, he had served as president of the Denver Board of Education, headed the Social Services Department, and started numerous community organizations. Bernie had impeccable follow-through, no matter how long it took or how difficult it would be. “You have to work hard and not give up,” he would tell me. In the turbulent 1960s, when Latinos were just beginning to forge their identity and to organize as a community, Bernie inspired others to do the same. The decades it took to desegregate the Denver Public Schools are a testament to his endurance and persistence.

Whenever Bernie faced a conflict or challenge, he was gracious and humorous. This “Don’t take things so seriously” approach gave people perspective and made working together enjoyable. I later realized that humor and equanimity were smart strategies when strenuous, long-term work was asked of people. (Chapter 11 has more about how making leadership an enjoyable process ensures continuity.)

When I asked Bernie about leadership, he paused and then said, “Well, first, a leader has to be really secure. You have to know who you are and have respect for yourself.” He radiated that sense of self, and you could always count on Bernie being Bernie. “To get things done,” he cautioned, “you have to be sensitive to what people need and have genuine feelings for them.” He demonstrated this by being accessible, listening intently, and having a warm and humble manner.

Bernie and I would eat burritos or egg rolls and “just visit” during our lunches. But our relationship had a profound impact on my leadership. He would counsel, “Be yourself—no one can do that better than you can!” Bernie taught me the essence of personalismo.

1. First and foremost, a leader is an authentic person, which fosters consistency and dependability.

2. Relationships are fashioned in a familial manner like the one I had with Bernie.

3. A leader has genuine feelings for people, listens to them, and treats them with respect and courtesy.

4. A leader is un hombre de palabra (a man of his word). Actions align with words, which fosters congruence and engenders trust, or confianza.

The Personalismo of the Leader

WHILE EVERYONE HAS INHERENT worth, respect is given to a leader based on his character, the manner in which he lives, how he treats others, and the contribution he makes to family and community. A leader’s credibility depends on having a reputation that he cares about others and treats everyone equally.

To act like one is better than or knows more than someone else, or to practice any kind of elitism, runs contrary to personalismo, where everyone has something to contribute and has inherent worth. Personalismo is the great equalizer driving a shared leadership process.

Leadership is evolving into a collaborative and participatory process in which people, relationships, and cooperation are central—pivotal traits of the Latino culture. Personalismo secures these relational aspects of leadership.

Since personalismo encourages authenticity, spending time with a group of Latino leaders will quickly make it evident that conformity is not a cultural mainstay. The Latino commandment to “be yourself” can be seen in a love of distinctiveness—bright colors, conspicuous jewelry, boisterous conversation, and permission to express your true feelings. This makes for a whole assortment of leaders, a tolerance for different styles, and support for individuality!

I have been the beneficiary of this warm acceptance. My very outgoing, determined, sometimes “pushy” personality could have been rebuffed. Instead, I have been told it is a gift that allows me to accomplish things others might not attempt (and enables me to enlist others in coming along!). Latinos will say, “That is just Juana,” which for everyone means “Just be you. Nobody’s perfect, and you can bring your unique talents into play.”

Personalismo Builds Relationships

IN MORE MATERIALISTIC OR status-conscious societies, a person might be respected for his money, position, and title; the neighborhood he lives in; his car, clothes, and other trappings of “success.” But “How much are you worth?” does not reference a person’s inner values, morals, or social contribution.

In the Latino culture, people’s value stems from who they are unto themselves and from their membership in a family group, rather than from their social status or from their professional accomplishments. Personalismo is the unconditional recognition of the essential value of each individual.¹ The warm, friendly, and personable way Latinos relate to one another and the active interest they take in people’s lives reflects personalismo. By emphasizing good manners and congenial interpersonal relationships where people validate and support each other, personalismo reinforces the We, or collective. It springs from the culture’s humanistic values.

Miguel Corona, a faculty member at the University of Phoenix who speaks on the Latino workforce, explains in his blog Interns Matter, how utilizing personalismo gains credibility:

A few weeks ago, I presented to a Latino student organization. Before my presentation, I spent quite a long time talking with many of the students asking them about their backgrounds and experiences, respective majors and classroom work, and plans after graduation. I also shared everything about my background, and how it mirrored many of their experiences.

By the time I was introduced to speak, I had already established an initial relationship with most of the students and could sense that the rapport I developed helped me generate credibility before speaking one word. This highlights the special emphasis Hispanics put on relationship-building prior to engaging in business or developing professional relationships. It’s based on the cultural idea that individuals are valued more than material belongings and is known as personalismo.²

Corona is modeling four qualities of personalismo: (1) respect and regard for the individual; (2) sharing one’s own background and personal experiences; (3) building personal relationships; and (4) creating a “cultural bond” with people. These qualities facilitate people’s identification with the leader and make it easier to follow and emulate him.

Cultural connectivity is the special tie Latinos have with one another. When establishing a relationship, a person usually shares where she is from, who her familia is, and tidbits about her background. Latinos come from intact communities where people feel like they belong; may have similar backgrounds, values, and experiences; and share a collective identity and history. For instance, Latinos might have similar childhood memories (like eating rice and beans, celebrating their first Holy Communion, or having extended familia live with them). They may know a member of someone’s large extended family, have a mutual friend, or participate in the same community group or church.

An upward nod of the head and a pursing of lips is the physical signal that Latinos recognize each other as belonging to the same ethnic group. Today, their growing identity and special affinity known as la Raza is strengthening the Latino preference for establishing personal relationships and connecting through their culture.

Because leaders come from and derive their authority from their communities, practicing these qualities of personalismo establishes credibility. And it is the foundation for a valued leadership asset—being seen as a person of confianza (trustworthiness).

Personalismo Promotes Confianza

BERNIE ALWAYS KEPT HIS word. For Latino leaders this often means never surrendering to the odds and being determined to go the long haul. He modeled dependability and follow-through and stayed active in the community until the day he died. These traits made Bernie a trusted leader and a person de confianza. Confianza means the leader has established trust based on his honesty, his personal relationships with people, and his demonstrated reliability.

The saying hombre de palabra (a man of his word) emphasizes that a person will do what he says he is going to do. Keeping commitments and following through establishes a leader’s track record. Furthermore, since Latinos value cooperation where everyone does his or her part, a person who doesn’t is letting down the entire group. The National Community for Latino Leadership (NCLL) found in a survey of over three thousand Latinos that keeping one’s word and delivering on one’s promises was the most valued quality for Latino leaders.³ Being de confianza underscores a leader’s credibility.⁴

Historical antecedents underlay the significance of confianza. Because Latinos had to succeed in schools, jobs, and other social institutions where rules of the dominant culture were sometimes murky and confusing, they had to rely on one another. Minorities often watched each other’s backs and shared information on what was acceptable behavior or what might get them into trouble. Economic survival and advancement required nurturing long-term support and trust. (White privilege and the psychology of oppression are discussed in chapter 4.)

A people-based culture would unravel without confianza, which keeps relationships strong and based on trust, loyalty, and dependability. The extended and elastic familia—which broadly refers to groups that have an affinity and have established mutual trust—reinforces confianza, since relationships are lifelong and reciprocal.

Carlos Orta, president of the Hispanic Association on Corporate Responsibility, observes, “Traditionally, trust (confianza) was the basis for making agreements and conducting business. We don’t do business with people we don’t know—establishing a personal relationship always precedes any kind of transaction.” Shaking hands and relying on the person’s word, not lawyers or contractual agreements, was sufficient because neither party would let the other down.” When a leader is de confianza, he is trusted as part of the group or accepted as familia.

Personalismo as a Leadership Practice

PERSONALISMO AND CONFIANZA ARE threads weaving together the ongoing sense of community and extended familia that blesses Latino people. By establishing meaningful relationships among people, personalismo strengthens community and establishes a sense of belonging. One generation ago people were not as mobile and lived in intact communities. People knew each other’s families and grandparents. Many had the type of relationships personalismo espouses.

In our fragmented world, building a sense of community is a key function of leadership. In fact, Robert Greenleaf in his profound thesis, The Servant as Leader, lamented that “building community was the lost knowledge of our times.”⁵ Personalismo can lay the groundwork for more meaningful and authentic relationships as well as a renewed sense of community. Here are ten practices that help leaders cultivate relationships and gain confianza, all of which enhance personalismo.

1. Bienvenido—Be welcoming! Give a natural, friendly smile and make brief eye contact when meeting someone. Stand up and shake hands both when greeting and when saying good-bye (this indicates respect).

2. Remember the Hispanic hospitality golden rule—Mi casa es su casa. Invite people to sit down and make themselves at home. If possible, serve them something to eat or drink.

3. Spend time building rapport before discussing the issue at hand, dealing with problems, or making requests. Meet with people individually or in small groups.⁶

4. Ask people about their family history, where they are from, their values, and traditions. Remember: building confianza takes time!

5. Emphasize personal dignity, honor, and one’s “good name”; be sensitive to a person’s pride.

6. Take a personal interest in people. Get to know their family makeup and inquire how the family is doing. Ask follow-up questions on other details, such as, “How was your son’s birthday party?”

7. Be open! Share your own background, family history, and experiences as a way of making a personal and mutual connection. Include your cultural background.

8. Learn and practice cultural values and tendencies that foster Latino relationships and behavior, such as respeto (respect) and being honesto (honest) and simpático (congenial).

9. Listen carefully when a person is speaking, and take care not to appear distracted or uninterested. Do not do other things like check your email or text messages.

10. Use a few words in español. Especially for non-Latinos this conveys the willingness to reach out to people in a way that respects their culture, language, and ways of communication.

Perhaps these are basic courtesies that should be extended to all people. Yet when these hallmarks of personalismo are skipped with non-Latinos, it may not make a big difference in the outcome of the relationship or of future encounters. In fact, there is a common saying, “You don’t need to like someone to work with him,” implying a more practical and task-oriented process than a relational one.

Failure to connect personally with a Latino, however, can mean a loss of trust and credibility. He may seek a different person (or leader) to work with or go somewhere else to obtain services or make purchases.⁷ These ten practices gain trust, nurture confianza, and affirm people’s individuality and contributions. They establish the leader as someone who is genuine, caring, and able to make personal connections. With secure relationships, the leader has laid the stepping-stones to a community leadership process based on mutual respect and equality.

¡Ándale!—Moving Forward

WE CONTINUE EXPLORING CONCEPTS on how Latinos prepare for leadership with our next principle—conciencia, which speaks to the inner process that strengthens self-awareness. Knowing oneself is a prerequisite for being an authentic leader and for aligning words with action. It is the foundation for the revered designation as a leader who is de confianza.