chapter 2

Flip Your Mindset

I’m driving home Friday. I’m pumped about my raise. All these thoughts start going through my head, like, “How am I going to celebrate? What will I do with that extra money each paycheck? What new things will I buy? Maybe those golf clubs I’ve wanted.” Then it hits me—I’ve got to lead people now. I’ve been an individual contributor all my working life. How do I suddenly start on Monday being a boss?

I felt awesome driving home. It really was an honor that my organization wanted to promote me into a leadership role. And that the executive team and others in my organization thought that highly of me? Wicked awesome.

Being a boss was a new challenge for me. Yeah, I was hesitant. But I really was up for it. I’ve always been up for a challenge.

But I definitely had that “Oh bleep” feeling too. I knew that when I sat down at my desk on Monday, that comfortable feeling of being in control, responsible for me and my actions alone, and the confidence that I was pretty darn good at what I did, would vanish. I knew that on Monday, something would be different. I had to be different.

So what did I do? I did what any highly motivated go-getter would do who wants to prove that he deserved the promotion into leadership.

I crammed.

I’ll rephrase that. I seriously thought about cramming. I thought about pulling a couple all-nighters perusing all the blogs and reading all the pertinent journal articles possible, and ordering all the leadership books I could, with overnight delivery. I was going to cram like it was an exam I hadn’t studied for. But preparing to be a boss by cramming and pulling all-nighters won’t work for a new leader. Doing nothing with a “business as usual” outlook won’t work either.

What will? Take a deep breath, and accept that as soon as you get promoted into your first leadership role, you aren’t an individual contributor anymore. And flip your script. If you don’t, your career is likely on a track to derailment.

Derailment: Are You a Train or a Trainwreck?

We all know them—we’ve seen them walking in our organizations. We may even be one. Rock star. Golden child. High potential. Da bomb. We’re kind of a big deal, as Ron Burgundy from the movie Anchorman puts it. People in our organizations with huge upside. Several of them make it as leaders and have successful careers.

But sometimes, for various reasons, some don’t. They stopped progressing. They were demoted or fired. That’s what derailment is, and I’ve been studying it at CCL since 2005. Morgan McCall and Michael Lombardo, well-known researchers at CCL, were among the first to uncover reasons why people derailed decades ago, and those reasons are still relevant today.¹ Be aware of these because they can get in the way of flipping your script and ruin your chances of being a boss everyone wants to work for.

Reason 1: “$@#! Happens”

Some reasons leaders derail are beyond our control. For instance, “$@#! happens” with a downsizing, merger, reorganization, or bad luck. Things that have nothing to do with who we are, things that happened in our organization that we had no control over, derail our chances at being an effective leader.

But even when “$@#! happens” and you survived that downsizing or reorg, you may still derail because you failed to do something that you actually had control over. Many rock-star individual contributors derailed as leaders because they were set in their ways, unable to change and adapt to new surroundings, environments, and organizational or management culture. They didn’t flip their script. As a new leader, adapt to changes that come your way, to avoid derailing.

Reason 2: Success Goes to Our Heads

Because rock-star individual contributors lived the script that helped them become successful, they’ve hardly ever received negative feedback. They start believing in their own press clippings. They get big egos. They feel invincible. So, they become overly ambitious and unaware of the follow-through needed to move work toward completion or meet the obligations of the business. When some transition to leadership, where they can’t rely on their successes, talent, skills, and technical savvy anymore, it all falls apart. They didn’t flip their script. They derailed.

Reason 3: Weaknesses Were Ignored and Never Addressed

Our own weaknesses play a huge role in derailment. Granted, these weaknesses may have been overlooked in the beginning. They may have even “worked” in the beginning. But over time, these weaknesses persisted, were ignored, never addressed, and eventually led to derailment.

Think about the person in your organization who is rather cold, arrogant, or insensitive. This individual doesn’t handle conflicts well and can’t build teams effectively. He or she is self-centered and gets things done by being insensitive, pushing others as hard as humanly possible, up to and beyond the tipping point. This person yells, screams, belittles, berates, and leaves a trail of bruised people behind. In the script of some individual contributors, bullying helped them become successful; it’s how they made (and exceeded) the numbers and got ahead. And research sort of supports it. Gerald Ferris and his colleagues² believe bullying can be effective at certain times and in certain situations if used infrequently, strategically, and for short-term improvements. Bullying “immature” workers may force them to either “shape up” or, better yet, compel them to “ship out” so that the position can be filled with someone more appropriate, mature, or just plain easier to work with.

So does this mean the boss everyone wants to work for should bully others? No. Ferris and his colleagues also say emphatically that bullying is not effective in the long term and can cause a dysfunctional work environment. People who are bullied at work tend to feel less satisfied in their jobs; their health worsens; absenteeism rates rise; and they’ll want to leave your organization for good. Further, the long-term effects of constant bullying lead to decreased motivation, morale, and satisfaction in jobs. All that bullying, pushing, and insensitivity is really part of a weakness some leaders may have. And bullying definitely won’t work as leaders move up the organization, where artful influence, perspective taking, and political savvy are undeniably needed.

These leaders who bully clearly have problems with interpersonal relationships and are unable to build and lead teams. If these or other ignored weaknesses have been part of your script as an individual contributor, flip your script now.

Reason 4: Strengths Became Weaknesses

Lastly, strengths people had as individual contributors may become weaknesses as they become leaders later. No doubt, we all must rely on our strengths, the things we are good at, the things that make us stand out from other people. Strengths are part of our script. They make us subject matter experts and specialists in our trade, and help us get promoted into leadership. For example, being independent is a strength many individual contributors have, and oftentimes part of our script.

But strengths like independence, which served us well as individual contributors, can become weaknesses later as leaders. For instance, new leaders must rely on others, work with others, and manage teams. Although you were being lauded for the independence that’s part of your script as an individual contributor, as a new leader you will be criticized and vilified for your independence because it is nowhere in the script of a boss.

Derailment definitely went through my own head, as a new leader, before my “official” first day as a boss.

It’s sort of ironic; I study derailment, and now that I’m a boss, I’m nervous it will happen to me. One of my strengths is my ability to do things on my own. I get things done by myself all the time. But as a new leader, if I really and truly intend to succeed at being a boss, I should let that go. I must work with others to accomplish some major things that I would never be able to do alone. If I try to do it by myself, I may start behaving like those derailed leaders I study.

Maybe knowing all of these reasons could have helped Kurt avoid derailment.

A Case Study in Derailment: Kurt the Expert

Kurt excelled in high school. He was in all sorts of extracurricular activities, got into a great college, graduated with honors, and got into his first choice for a graduate program. During an internship, he landed in a dream organization, and excelled at doing all the work he was assigned, and more. He continually went above and beyond what was asked and became known for things he’d always been given praise for his entire life: his confidence, discipline, drive, determination, rigor, attention to detail, strong work ethic, ambition, take-charge attitude, and technical ability. He was groomed to be a supervisor as soon as he finished his degree.

“It’s a lock,” Kurt thought. “They’d be stupid if they didn’t hire me. I’m productive. I get work done. All I have to do is pass this simple little supervisor selection test. I just have to say all the right things, answer all the questions correctly. No problem.”

Though he thought he knew all the answers, he failed the test. He was shocked and dumbfounded. He asked his boss and superiors what went wrong. “Kurt, you clearly conveyed that you have the knowledge and skills to be a great worker. But you fell short in telling us how you can work well with others. You don’t have the experience beyond your job to understand how things work around here and how relationships are so important. You didn’t convey how you can lead teams effectively and explain how you can encourage, manage, and motivate others. You just don’t have enough experience being a supervisor, and in all the things supervisors must do, in order to be a supervisor.”

Kurt’s dream job was gone. There was no place else to go in the organization. Eventually he had no choice but to leave the organization.

You can probably see how the behaviors and reasons people derail all played out in Kurt’s derailment. Kurt’s ego got the better of him. He clearly had knowledge and technical savvy. But he wasn’t able to show that he could cultivate relationships inside and outside his department. He couldn’t get out of his role as a great individual contributor and show how he could work well leading teams and working with others up and down the organization. His strengths as an individual contributor clearly were weaknesses as a supervisor. He never flipped his script.

Let Kurt’s story be a warning sign that it can happen to anyone.

Even me.

I’m Kurt. I had my “dream job” all lined up for me out of graduate school. Yet I failed the supervisory selection test for all the reasons listed. And here is the humbling, ironic part. I failed a supervisor selection test made by a bunch of industrial-organizational psychologists. My degree? Industrial-organizational psychology. My major field of study? Leadership. So, I failed a test that in many respects I had the degree and education to actually make. Epic fail.

Out of graduate school, I was known for being bright, highly skilled, and a hard worker. The script obviously worked for me as an individual contributor. But my career stalled out and derailed at that organization because I thought I could just rest on that reputation. I didn’t realize I had to flip my script.

Granted, some of you may be saying, “This isn’t me, and it will never be me.” You may be right. It’s like what I’ve said in my research: about half of managers are effective in the workplace³ and are great at what they do. They will never venture too far into the possibility of derailment.

Of course, if my research says 50 percent of managers are effective, that means the other 50 percent aren’t. So some may be living in denial, on their way to derailment, and just don’t know it yet. In my research, blind spots are relevant predictors of derailment potential, and it can happen to anybody. Let this be a public service announcement for you to flip your script to get off the track to derailment.

Others, however, may see it unfolding in front of them. You may feel helpless and demoralized because you do see the derailment signs. Is there hope? Emphatically, yes! With work, time, and support, you and anyone else who truly want to get off the track to derailment can. That’s what the science, practice, and art behind this book are all about.

Your Mindset Is a Terrible Thing to Waste

For all new leaders, let this be your wake-up call. If you truly want to be the boss everyone wants to work for, the first thing you need to do is flip your mindset.

Why You Should Flip Your Mindset

In my latest research on nearly 300 new leaders, the most effective ones flipped their mindset.

First, I gathered performance ratings of each of the new leaders. Through CCL assessments, I asked the bosses of these new leaders how well they were doing on the job as new leaders, to understand who excelled and who struggled.

I also asked these new leaders a series of questions about their own motivation behind learning and development.⁴ Now, we all have motivations, reasons why we want to learn something new. One of these is Charlie’s main motivation:

I want to learn because it will make me look good in front of others, especially my coworkers. It will really set me apart from everyone. I’ll impress others with what I’m learning, and I’ll get some great recognition too, which is pretty motivating.

Now, there’s nothing inherently wrong with this. We are all ambitious and seek personal excellence. For some of us, that’s our major motivational factor for learning. For others, it’s sort of in the background. But all of us have this motivation for learning to some degree or another.

There’s a second motivation we all have, like the one Judy primarily feels:

I want to learn because I find learning inherently satisfying. I really love to learn; it’s so engaging to learn something new. It’s fun. It’s not really about me, my skills, my abilities, and wanting to impress others. No, I’m motivated to learn because of the joy that comes from it.

Again, some of us feel this way a lot, some a little. But all of us have this motivation for learning to some degree or another.

So how do those two motivations play out for new leaders?

Let’s first look at new leaders who were struggling and were ineffective in their jobs, according to their bosses. Their motivation to learn because it brought them recognition, made people aware of how good they were, and impressed others (like Charlie’s major motivation) was more prevalent than the motivation to learn because it was fun, exciting, and engaging. It’s like that old breakup line: “It’s not you; it’s me.” And we know that’s the script of individual contributors who want people to know how talented they are, drawing attention to their own abilities, achievements, and personal desire to get ahead. Their script stayed the same and never flipped when they transitioned into leadership. And the results suggest they weren’t very successful.

And the new leaders who excelled? The ones with high performance ratings from their own boss? The opposite was true. Their motivation to learn because it was fun, exciting, and engaging (like Judy’s major motivation) far outweighed their motivation to learn because it would bring them rewards, recognition, and would impress others. They flipped their script by flipping their mindset.

Want to be effective as a new leader and be the boss everyone wants to work for? My research on new leaders suggests that you flip your script by flipping your mindset. Be motivated to learn because it’s fun, engaging, exciting, and you enjoy it.

Some have found the importance of flipping your mindset. Carol Dweck is arguably best known for her book Mindset.⁵ According to Dweck, there are two predominant mindsets. Some people have a fixed mindset (what some academics call entity theorists). They think what gets them ahead in life are their innate abilities, intelligence, talents, and hard work. They must constantly prove themselves to others. They want to look smart. They are motivated by extrinsic motives (external rewards, approval from others, wanting to look good in front of others, or wanting to prove they are better than others). They also have a fear of failure because failure says something negative about their abilities.

Others have a growth mindset (what some academics call incremental theorists). They think their abilities can be developed through learning, training, and persistence. They believe they can improve from their own failures. They want to learn because it’s fun, engaging, intrinsically pleasing, and challenging. This attitude resembles a flipped script.

The research of Dweck and others clearly demonstrates the positive effects of a growth mindset in parenting, school, and relationships. And regardless of leadership experience, their research provides evidence that leaders with a growth mindset, a flipped script, are much better off than leaders with a fixed mindset.

For some, that’s great news. You’re convinced and ready to flip. But for others, you know yourself really well. You may believe you have a fixed mindset. It’s probably impractical and unattainable to even try to flip. Are you stuck? Can you really flip your mindset? Yes, you can.

In one study, Peter Heslin, Don Vandewalle, and Gary Latham focused only on managers with a fixed mindset.⁶ They purposefully split fixed-mindset managers into two groups, each taking a 90-minute workshop. The formats of the workshops were nearly identical, with one critical difference:

•  One group’s 90-minute workshop emphasized the fact that people have multiple abilities, and in some areas they are strong, whereas in other areas, they are weak.

•  The other group’s 90-minute workshop focused specifically on adopting a growth mindset through “self-persuasion.” In that workshop, managers tried to talk themselves into adopting a growth mindset—in other words, flipping their mindset.

So what happened?

The fixed-mindset managers who attended the “self-persuasion” training (described in the second bullet point) were more willing to provide coaching and had higher quantity and quality of performance improvement suggestions. These changes were not seen in the fixed-mindset managers who attended the other workshop (described in the first bullet point).

If you think you have a fixed mindset, the research offers you hope. If given the proper time, energy, and support, you can flip your mindset. These studies point to three great things for you to remember as a new leader in flipping your mindset.

First, mindsets can be valuable to you as a new leader. Undoubtedly, mindsets have deep and positive effects on us.

Second, you can flip your mindset. You are not stuck with one mindset your entire life. Your brain is highly malleable, always forming new connections. You can learn new things and flip your mindset at any age if you work hard enough, focus hard enough, and want it badly enough.

Third, you need support. With enough time and support from others, you can flip your mindset. Support from people at work, and away from work, is an important factor in your own personal development. Leaders who report high levels of social support are better able to cope with hardships, overcome challenges, and learn and develop in their jobs.⁷ Having support around you is crucial for you to flip your mindset.

What You Can Do to Flip Your Mindset

The one big thing you can do to flip your script by flipping your mindset? It’s your “mindchatter”: talk to yourself differently. A lot of what Dweck, Heslin and his colleagues, and others recommend in flipping your mindset revolves around the voices that come from us—self-talk, or what I call “mindchatter.” It’s that inner dialogue we have providing us opinions and evaluations on how well (or not so well) we are at doing things. It’s the play-by-play commentary. It’s the positive, optimistic, and validating chatter we hear when we do something right. It’s also the critical, harsh, crippling, destructive chatter we hear when we aren’t at our best and are struggling.

Organizational psychologist Steven Rogelberg and his research team literally read what leaders told themselves, the mindchatter of 189 top executives who went through a leadership development program at CCL.⁸ All of these leaders wrote a letter addressed to themselves that would be mailed to them weeks later. In the letters, the executives talked about goals they wanted to achieve, what they had learned in the program, their work and personal life issues, and their hopes for the future. Rogelberg and his team deconstructed the mindchatter in these letters and found a key difference between the type of mindchatter effective and ineffective executives have.

They first examined effective executives who were rated by their own followers and bosses as “outstanding” and “exceptional” at demonstrating leadership to others in providing support, mentoring, helpfulness, and collaboration. The mindchatter of these executives was constructive, insightful, self-reflective, motivational, and practical in nature. Interestingly, they tended to view themselves as being in better health too. Plus, they usually ended their letters on a positive, reassuring note, confident of their success in the future.

What about ineffective executives? Their mindchatter was destructive, more negative in nature. They didn’t want to face the challenges ahead. Some were even afraid of challenges and failure. They were also pessimistic. Further, they tended to feel that job stress was affecting their health. And they usually ended their letters on a more depressing note, believing they wouldn’t reach their goals.

I know it’s tough. We all face doubt and uncertainty. We all have times when the voices in our head say something like, “I’ve never been a boss before. Can I do it?” Or, “I’ve never failed at anything. What happens if I fail at this?” Or worse, “I’m not good at this. I’ll never be able to flip my script.”

When things start to go sideways, we all tend to start focusing more on ourselves, our own talents, and keeping our egos in check. When you hear these sorts of lines in your head, recognize it’s not the mindset of the boss everyone wants to work for. Shut it up. And flip it.

Mindchatter matters. As a new leader, make sure your mindchatter is constructive. Be perceptive, motivational, realistic, and positive. Listen to the right mindchatter. Use your mindchatter to tell yourself, “You can do it in time” or “You do have the power to learn about leading others” and “You can be the boss everyone wants to work for.”

And it’s really important to use “you,” not “me.”

Even the Pronouns Matter

The nearly 300 new leaders in my study all took part in CCL’s “Maximizing your Leadership Potential” program, a three-day leadership development course. Before they came to the program, they wrote a letter to themselves sort of like the executives did in the Rogelberg study. The difference? Instead of writing a letter to themselves in the future, these new leaders all wrote letters to their past selves. The instructions were:

You have learned many lessons since making the transition from an individual contributor to a manager. What do you now know about leading people that would have been helpful to have known at the time of that transition? Write yourself a letter, telling your earlier self those helpful leadership lessons.

Consider this new leader in the construction industry:

Since I became a leader, I’ve overcome many obstacles and learned many lessons. Some the hard way. I know that there are so many different personalities, and all have to be dealt with in a different way. My biggest lessons have come with the more sensitive people. But I realize I am so much better at dealing with them.

I have learned to listen to their needs even though I know what they are. I also need to give them the praise that they figured things out, even when I already knew. I have a long ways to go to be the great leader that I want to be, but I know I am on the right path.

Now, look at this letter written by a new leader from the aerospace and defense industry:

You’ve grown a lot over the past three years. As you’ve come to really know your position, you’ve adapted it to suit your strengths. You worked hard to make it your own. You’ve challenged yourself to be a team player and also a team leader. Though you’ve done so much to come into your own as a leader, it would have been easier if you had let your voice be heard earlier and louder. A weakness you’ve had, even since college, is to let others lead if you think they know more than you. However, to effectively lead others and shape situations, you must use your skills, be confident, and speak up!

Undeniably, these leaders have great lessons for any new leader. But from a mindchatter perspective, did you notice the striking difference in pronoun usage? The focus of the mindchatter around the pronouns used, specifically, the first-person use of “I” and “me” pronouns versus the second-person “you” pronouns were quite different. And when I linked the amount of times those pronouns were used to performance ratings made by their coworkers, something very telling appeared.

New leaders who used the pronouns “me” and “I” more and more, like the person in the first example, were perceived by their peers as more likely to derail and their boss tended to rate them as low performers.

New leaders who used “you” more in their letters (like the second) were perceived by their peers as less likely to derail.

In her book, Carol Dweck discussed the “I” versus “you” pronoun among chief executive officers (CEOs), the people at the very top of organizations. CEOs who wanted validation—superstar or hero status, or wanted others to believe they were the smartest, most talented person in the room—tended to have a fixed mindset. They used the pronoun “I” more. Others mentioned in her book, like Jack Welch of GE, Anne Mulcahy of Xerox, or Lou Gerstner of IBM, had a growth mindset. They hated using the word “I” and preferred to use “you” or “we” or “us” in their writings and speeches. They also emphasized the importance of learning and growing as a leader, not being the smartest and best and brightest in the room. “It’s not about me anymore,” right? They got it. They flipped their script by flipping their mindset.

The research of Dweck and Rogelberg, as well as my own on new leaders, undeniably says our mindsets are powerful. Our mindchatter is powerful. What we think, the way we talk to ourselves, even drilled down to the smallest of pronouns we use in our own mindchatter, can predict our effectiveness as new leaders. Flip your script by flipping your mindset.

Back to Kurt

This chapter provided examples, cautionary tales, and true-life stories of leaders who couldn’t make it, those who did, and the scripts and mindsets they had. In closing, let’s return to Kurt . . . I mean me.

First, know that just because you derail or feel you may be on a track toward derailment, your career and life aren’t necessarily over. After coming to CCL, my career really flourished, and I became a director. Maybe you have suffered a demotion; maybe you had to leave your dream job. But, like me, you can make it someplace else.

But hear this too. When you get that second chance, flip your script, or a similar outcome will likely occur. Look at my own mindchatter:

I’ve had to flip my mindset, and it’s been extremely difficult. My first gut instinct? Think of myself and what should be done for my own benefit. As a leader, though, you’ve had to purposefully flip your mindset and think less of “me” and more of others so the ending won’t be the same. And when times get tough, or you don’t quite know what to do, stay positive and use “you” to stay motivated.

The takeaway from all of this?

The script you had as an individual contributor clearly worked for you because it got you your first leadership position. If you keep living that script over and over again as a new leader and still expect success, you are likely on the track to derailment.

Flip your mindset and you’ll be off to a great start as you flip your script. Next on your agenda? Flip your skill set. As a leader, it’s not your technical skills that make you a success, but your personal skills. And they’ll need developing. Concentrate, build, and develop skills that might not have been relevant to you as an individual contributor and technical expert, but that are now definitely needed as a new leader going forward.