TWENTY
Truth
TELL IT
Ponder this: How often are you giving and getting feedback?
Are you an honest person? Do you believe in telling the truth? Most people will answer yes to both questions.
Our studies show that employees yearn for straight talk. They want to hear the truth about their performance and the organization. They want to tell you the truth about your performance. When the truth is missing, people may feel demoralized, less confident, and ultimately less loyal. Of course you know where that might lead—right out your door and through the competition’s. Tell the truth if you want to engage and keep your good people.
A New View of Truth Telling
The secret of truth telling is to view it as a gift. If you believe that giving truthful, balanced feedback to people will help them to be more effective in their careers and perhaps in life, then you will be more inclined to give that feedback.
Have you ever taken music, dance, or karate lessons or had a soccer, rugby, or golf coach? Think back to that time and recall one of your lessons.
Did he demonstrate a better way to grip the club? Did she help you develop better rhythm? Weren’t they constantly helping you fine-tune your approach? The feedback was probably balanced between praise—“That was great. Play it again just like that!”—and correction—“This time kick the ball more like this.” Their gift was honest feedback, from someone willing to tell you there was still room for improvement and committed to helping you get there.
Your employees expect and need the same kind of coaching from you today.
Are they getting it? Perhaps not. Gallup’s ongoing, global, Q12 engagement research (47,000 respondents in 116 countries) gives us a clue. At the bottom of the ranking is the item that asks employees whether someone at work has talked to them about their progress in the last six months. This finding suggests that managers are not providing workers with regular, individualized, truthful feedback.45
Tell Them the Truth About Their Work
Think about the people who work with you or report to you. Consider their relative strengths and weaknesses, their blind spots, their overused strengths, and the flaws that may stall them. Have you been honest and direct about your perceptions with these people?
I wish I could have a dollar for the number of occasions I’ve had to untangle a situation where at the outset if there had been a clear, thoughtful expression of truth, there would be no mess!
—Matt Hawkins, Leadership Development, Tandem Ministries, New Zealand
When and how did you give them your input? Even the best bosses might honestly confess that they have trouble giving people direct feedback, especially about possible flaws or areas where employees need improvement. Most of us were not trained to give negative news. Our elders taught us that “honesty is the best policy,” but we also learned, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” So we don’t.
Managers say they hesitate to give critical feedback because they
• are afraid of hurting feelings or demoralizing employees—even prompting them to quit.
• are concerned about appearing arrogant or abrasive.
• are uncomfortable giving bad news or find it easier to give only positive news.
• are not sure they’re 100 percent right.
• worry about a defensive reaction.
• work in a polite organization where critical feedback isn’t given.
• don’t like to judge other people.
When I give feedback, I’m signaling to people that I’m interested in their future.
—Larry Bossidy, coauthor, Execution: The Discipline of Getting Things Done
I honestly thought I was doing a great job. I had been promoted several times, had had positive performance reviews, and had received a bonus every year. The next thing I knew, I was passed over for a big promotion, shoved in a corner, and ignored. When the downsizing happened, I was laid off. Only then did I hear that there had been some problems with my management style through the years.
—Unemployed middle manager
Ask Them for Their View
Neuroscientists tell us that beginning with a question will reduce fear. If you are one of those managers who finds giving feedback difficult, consider asking your employees to provide their own points of view first. What is their view of the past quarter? What areas of their performance do they feel best about? What successes have they had? Probe for the specific skills they used.
Ask, too, what they might do to be even more effective. Where do they most need to grow? Ask them about a recent project that they might do differently if they had the chance. Ask what they learned from the experience. Most employees know the answers to these questions, especially if they’re fortunate enough to have had truth-telling managers.
The Truth Hurts—or Does It?
When employees in most organizations are asked what they would like more of from their managers, their first response is usually feedback. People want to know where they stand—they want to know if your perception of their performance is the same as their own.
Years of research (much of it done by the Center for Creative Leadership) confirms that the absence of honest feedback derails leaders at all levels. Sometimes that means people lose their job, but more often it means they fail to fulfill their promise.
Even the high-potentials in your organization need honest, balanced feedback. Too often they hear only how wonderful, bright, and talented they are. Without feedback, these employees can come to a startling, shocking halt after several promotions, big raises, and starring roles. Why? Because no one helped them see their rough edges and the need for continual improvement. They began to believe their own press and developed major blind spots. Their confidence turned into arrogance, in part because of insufficient, inaccurate, imbalanced, or tardy feedback from key people in their lives. The truth could have saved them.
To Do
Jot down the names of each of your direct reports. Next to each name write the words “more of,” “less of” and “continue.” List some behaviors and action steps in each category. What would you like to see them doing differently or continuing to do? And what difference would it make to them, to you, to the team?
Gather up your courage and talk to them! Ask for their reaction and their perspective to the feedback you’re giving.
“But I Already Gave Feedback—in December”
In many organizations, managers are only required to give feedback during the annual performance review. They give input to reward and reinforce employees’ behaviors and performance, to justify the annual raise, or to warn them about unsatisfactory performance and possible consequences. Some managers gloss over the negatives and focus on the good news only, and others do just the opposite. In either case, the reviews don’t tell the whole truth, and employees are often left frustrated by the whole process.
• Formal performance appraisal meetings are important. If you handle it badly, your employees may feel dismissed and unimportant. Plan carefully and balance the good news (positive) with the important news (room for improvement).
• Don’t give feedback just once a year. To retain your key people, it is essential that you give regular, honest input about their work.
Alas
In our organization, the employee and boss both fill out the performance appraisal form once a year. The idea is to compare results and have a discussion about the employee’s performance and where he might improve. I spent hours filling mine out, really trying to evaluate my strengths and weaknesses and how I had done in reaching my goals. I turned it in to my boss three weeks before our “big meeting.” When I showed up, it became clear that he had not looked at my report at all and had filled in his form in a hurry, just minutes before the meeting. All the ratings were just average, and when I asked him how I could bring them up, he said he would have to think about it. Twenty minutes later he said he had another meeting. So—I had waited all year to get feedback from my boss, and when it finally came, it was mediocre and almost meaningless. I have never felt so insignificant—maybe I need to start looking around for another job.
—Nursing supervisor, hospital
“What If I Don’t Know How?”
Many managers are uncomfortable giving feedback (positive or negative) because they don’t know how to do it simply and effectively. Many have never had a good role model. Giving feedback so that it doesn’t put employees on the defensive is key. How do you measure up? Take this quiz to see if you are feedback-savvy.
Feedback Quiz
My feedback . . .
• is private. (I choose a place where the person can hear my comments without being distracted or embarrassed.) |
___ True |
___ False |
• receives the time it deserves. (I plan the time and use it just for the purpose of giving feedback to someone.) |
___ True |
___ False |
• is frequent. (I give feedback immediately after actions that need to be changed or rewarded.) |
___ True |
___ False |
• focuses more on the future than the past. (I talk mostly about what can be done to improve, rather than what went wrong.) |
___ True |
___ False |
• is specific, with clear examples. (“I think you need to delegate more. You did last quarter’s entire project yourself.”) |
___ True |
___ False |
• gives information that helps the person to make decisions. (“Your team wants you to involve them more in planning.”) |
___ True |
___ False |
• gives suggestions for growth and improvement. (“I think you could work on negotiating skills, especially if you want that new role.”) |
___ True |
___ False |
• allows for discussion. (“Tell me what you are thinking. What do you want to do about this?”) |
___ True |
___ False |
• creates next steps. (“Let’s meet again next week to create a development plan for you. Meanwhile, think about what you’d like to include in that plan.”) |
___ True |
___ False |
• preserves dignity (Is given in a caring, face-saving manner) |
___ True |
___ False |
In China we often go through a third party when giving feedback. That’s in order for the recipient to save face. It’s hard to have plain honest conversation, given the power differential between boss and employee. That’s where the trusted third party comes in. Remember to treat each other with honesty and sincerity—
—Consultant in Singapore
How did you do? If most of these statements are true for you, fantastic! Now go ask your employees if they agree. Ask them to tell you the truth.
Confidentially Speaking
Another popular approach is 360-degree feedback: employees receive feedback from you, their peers, mentors, customers, and direct reports. The feedback also includes a self-assessment that lets people compare their own perceptions with the views of others. The 360-degree feedback highlights both strengths and opportunities to improve, and its purpose is developmental. Because it is usually anonymous, raters tend to be very honest. It is valuable for all of us to get input from someone other than the boss; this process is just one way of doing that.
Note: Be sure to follow up with coaching and support for people who get critical feedback about behaviors they need to change. Getting the feedback is usually just the first step; most people will need help creating and implementing a development plan.
Tell Them the Truth About the Organization
Research overwhelmingly supports the notion that engaged employees are “in the know.” They want to be trusted with the truth about the business, including its challenges and downturns.
We know, however, that there may be times when you are simply not at liberty to tell the whole truth. A pending merger, reorganization, or change at the top of the organization could be off-limits for discussion with your team. Managers sometimes hold information back in the belief that it makes them more powerful or that it is better for their employees not to know. When you have bad news, give it face-to-face and as soon as possible. If you make a mistake, confess, tell them the truth, and accept responsibility. Your personal stock will go up, and so will the trust level on your team.
GO TO
________________
Information
page 77
Ask Them for the Truth (Even about You)
We would rather be ruined by praise then saved by criticism.
—Norman Vincent Peale
So far we’ve been talking about telling the truth to your employees. But what about getting them to tell you the truth? Many managers (especially at high levels) have had no formal performance reviews or feedback sessions for years. By the time they rise to the top, they might be getting almost no balanced, accurate input about how they get the work done. Often, leaders are rewarded as long as they hit their bottom-line targets.
Who, then, tells the senior leader about his warts? Probably no one. That absence of truthful, balanced feedback creates leaders who have missed the opportunity to grow, to be even more effective in their jobs, and to keep their talented people.
In a weekly staff meeting, I told my employees I wanted feedback about my skills as a manager. I told them I’d had input that I could be better at delegation and employee development. I asked them to rate me on a 1–10 scale on each of those skills and then to tell me what I would need to do differently to be scored a 10. One person told me I was already a 10—that got a laugh from the group. We agreed they would type their responses and give them to my assistant. She delivered the anonymous responses to me, and I shared them with my group at the next staff meeting. They know what I’m working on and are willing to give me more feedback as I try to improve.
—Sales VP, global biotech company
In almost every setting outside the modern organization, experts and masters continue to ask for the truth about their performance, and they strive for improvement. Athletes, musicians, and martial arts masters are examples of how people use honest feedback to refine their skills even more. Imagine what you, as a leader, could learn if your employees felt comfortable speaking up or pushing back. Imagine what that learning could do for you, your team and your organization.
The Corporate Executive Board tracks seven key financial indicators in more than 130 companies worldwide, and “the one most strongly correlated with ten-year returns is employees’ comfort in speaking up, even when they have negative things to say.”46 We know one manager who used the jerk checklist (page 90) to get some very interesting feedback! Find a way that works for you—and for the people on your team.
You can establish an environment where truth is welcome. And you can serve as a model for your employees as they watch how you seek and receive feedback. View the truth as a gift.
Thanks for the feedback. Send socks next time.
—UK sales manager with a good sense of humor
Bottom Line
Talented people want to hear the truth about themselves and the organization. They need to feel free to tell you the truth as well. Honest feedback is a gift you can both give and receive. Truth telling can help keep your talented people engaged and growing. Tell—and hear—the truth.
