Getting what you want does not always have to be at another person’s expense. It is possible to get what you want and still let your opponent have something. After all, you are entering into what you both hope will be a long and mutually beneficial relationship. As our political process demonstrates, societies thrive best not on triumph in domestic debates, but on reconciliation. Nothing would ever be accomplished if every technical disagreement turned into a civil war.

A good deal is one in which all sides meet their needs. Need can be reconciled. Compromise is okay. Unfortunately, not every person you meet at the bargaining table believes in this theory. Some people will give off signals that they are not trustworthy from the start. Then there are the slick ones who never appear to be the killers they are.

Terms aside, I have my own rule of thumb: unless I am totally comfortable with the executives and the company, I don’t even sit down to deal. I have always been guided by the feeling that a bad deal isn’t worth it under any circumstances.