Step Get Going

Your Simplementation Plan

The time to act has arrived. If you’re the “let’s just get in the car and start driving” type, this comes as welcome news. For others, it’s not easy to embark on a new adventure, no matter how exciting the destination. You’ve completed all the preliminaries, so grab your compass, map, and walking stick (or your vision, goals, and strategies) and set out on the path toward fulfilling your dreams. There’s no time like the present.

Start Simply, but Simply Start

How will you begin executing the strategies for achieving your most pressing priorities? At this point in the Business of Life workshops, I have people pair up and talk to their partners about what they will do in the next day to move forward, start a new venture, work on restoring balance, or simply grace their days with more joy notes. With a room full of witnesses, they commit to making it happen. Now it is your turn.

I know. The idea of starting to “live the life of my dreams” may be so daunting that it paralyzes you and nestles you even more firmly into the well-worn rut you’ve occupied for some time. So how do you suddenly burst into action? By starting small and creating what I call your “simplementation plan.”

Neuroscientists know that the human brain is wired to resist change. It’s a dilemma that stops a lot of people dead in their tracks. Contemplating any shift that requires a significant departure from your normal routine can be frightening. Your brain senses your fear and triggers the “fight or flight” reaction that floods your body with chemicals to prepare you to cope with dangerous situations. Because your brain can’t always distinguish between the types of threats you face, this primitive response can actually send you running away from the idea of initiating a job search just as fast as if you were being chased down by a saber-toothed tiger. Early in our evolution, such an extreme response made sense. But now that most of us don’t have to worry about being someone’s lunch, it can be a bit much. In order to deal with the immediate and potentially fatal threat of a snarling predator, your brain actually shuts down other functions so you can channel all of your energy into running for cover. When the “threat” is emotional stress, it can shut down your ability to tackle the very issue you need to focus on most.

So what’s the answer? Persuade your brain that the change is something it can handle. The trick is to keep taking small steps and let all those little things add up to something big. By asking your brain to accept small, incremental changes, you bypass the fight-or-flight response. That’s the premise behind kaizen, the Japanese term for “change for the better.” It’s about taking small steps to achieve a goal and pursue continuous improvement.²

The great news is that your brain is plastic, meaning that it reshapes itself throughout your life. As you learn new skills or acquire new habits, connections between brain cells called neurons are established or strengthened. If you do take those small steps and keep at it, those connections become stronger until the new routines become second nature. Alternatively, your brain prunes away connections that aren’t used over time.³ This is a use-it-or-lose-it system. The key is to get started and persevere until your brain adapts to help you make the new habit stick.

Break It Down

You don’t eat a watermelon by trying to sink your teeth into the uncut whole. You can’t get your mouth around the rind and it isn’t particularly tasty either. But if you cut it open, there are soft, sweet chunks that are easy—and delicious—to eat. You will take one small step at a time until you build up some momentum and become an unstoppable force moving toward your vision. Nothing begets success like success. So to get you started and keep you motivated, this chapter will focus on how to keep your vision quest simple while you master the art of breaking a big journey down into walkable steps.

You Are Just a First Step Away

Peggy and Gail, the artists who wanted to start an art therapy program for kids with cancer, were overwhelmed with the idea of launching a nonprofit organization, creating a business plan, establishing a fundraising program, and on and on. In fact, when we finished mapping out the steps they’d have to go through to carry out their plan, they were pretty much convinced they’d bitten off more than they could chew. My job, however, is to leave my clients feeling empowered to act, so we couldn’t finish our session until that was accomplished. I looked for ways to work with their natural wiring so they could find something in their wheelhouse that they could accomplish that would give them a sense of progress and possibility. Because they are both visual artists, the assignment I designed appealed to that sensibility. I sent them to a nearby art supply store to buy the most beautiful file folders they could find. The next day, they gathered all their loose papers and organized them into those pretty folders. They popped them into a file cabinet and, voilà! Our Space, Inc. had an office. It can be that simple to begin.

Creating a base of operations for Our Space was clearly an important and urgent goal. Choosing attractive folders—the very act of taking such a concrete step—registered a decidedly positive “joy-to-hassle ratio” on their joy meter. On the Risk/Reward Matrix, buying office supplies was a very low-risk effort and the reward was also relatively small when viewed against the goal of launching a whole organization. But it had an enormous payoff in that doing something so tangible had the critical effect of moving Peggy and Gail from being dreamers to doers. That simple act changed their whole perception of their ability to achieve their vision because it set them on a path where each step led to the next small, doable task.

Setting up the file system also convinced them that they could organize themselves even further. They pulled out their SWOT and decided to focus on their strengths first. They needed to build a base of support for Our Space, Inc. both for program development and for fundraising. They noted that they had an inspiring mission and vision and, as cancer survivors themselves, had a compelling message. They decided the next logical step was to develop some printed materials that would help them communicate their mission to people who could help them get the effort up and running. They also had some aptitude for writing, so this played to their strengths. Next, they used their artistic skills to design a logo, create some stationery, and print some business cards. Day by day, Our Space was closer to becoming a reality. Each successful step energized Gail and Peggy and led them to the next logical task.

Just Do It

The journey toward a new career can begin with a single phone call, followed by a commitment to make another one every day, asking for an informational interview. Just do something on your list related to your dream, no matter how trivial it seems. Accomplishing the first small thing is incentive to take the next step, then the next. And soon it’s a quick jog toward your destination.

When Simplementing Doesn’t Seem So Simple

Most of us can find the equivalent of Peggy and Gail’s file folders—that one small step we can take to get started implementing our strategies. But what do you do if a good first step for each part of your action plan isn’t so clear or if you face other obstacles that make it hard to get started? The following sections address some of the common challenges that can stand in the way of progress. We will look at some examples of how people got over (or around) their blocks and on their way. However, please note that the recommendations presented here are not a substitute for clinical care. If you are experiencing serious distress, please consider seeing a trained professional to help identify the root of your difficulties and prescribe the appropriate treatment.

As you’ve no doubt noticed by now, keeping your tasks simple and doable is one of the greatest keys to successful implementation of your well-crafted plans. If you’ve completed all the steps in the planning process, you have carefully considered what you want to do and how you want to do it. People tend to make matters much more complicated than they need to be. That tendency makes it hard to do things and even harder to do them well. So let’s take a look at how you can cut through the complexity and get going when the going seems tough.

Implementing When Inertia Overwhelms Your Resolve

Change is hard, even when it’s good. And it’s especially hard when your current pattern is as well worn and cozy as your favorite pair of furry slippers. When you’re stuck in a rut, any shift can seem so overwhelming that finding the energy to make such a major move seems truly impossible.

My coaching clients frequently find it helpful to get geared up to take that first step by reviewing what it’s costing them to stay put. Reminding yourself what motivated you to start this process in the first place is often enough to nudge you in a new direction.

Danielle got her wake-up call that day in her Business of Life workshop when she discovered that she had not employed most of her creative talents nor pursued any of her passions in her twenty-year career as a fashion buyer. But staying in an industry where she was so well established was her path of least resistance. She’d been so comfortably uncomfortable there for so long, it was daunting to even contemplate doing anything else. That day in her workshop, she confronted for the first time what staying put would cost her. It would continue to rob her of experiencing the joy she knew she could find doing something else.

What that something else was wasn’t entirely clear just yet, but one fact was evident. As long as she stayed where she was, nothing was going to change. Her first step was to leave her current company even as they offered her a promotion and ever-bigger bonuses. Simple enough. Easy? Not at all. Danielle needed to acknowledge that disentangling herself from her current situation was indeed taking action toward her new future. It was a critically important first step. Doing so would actually create the space she needed to consider her next steps.

Sure enough, contemplating so much free time was truly frightening to this high-powered executive who was so used to getting up at dawn to exercise before her marathon days at work. But she’d finally had enough and was ready to accept that the risk of not finding and pursuing her passion was greater than taking the leap.

After finally leaving her job, Danielle gave herself a few weeks to clean out her closets and play with her puppy. She took some time to take long walks on the beach near her house that she’d not been around to fully enjoy. Those walks gave her time and space to think about what she wanted to do next. She also had a shocking revelation: from the day she left her office, she’d not missed being there for a single moment. That realization made her feel like she was finally free to contemplate the future without looking back.

Danielle wasn’t ready to make big decisions about her next job, but she was ready for a little fun. She went back to her closet and zeroed in on her short-term goal of taking a cooking class. Her husband had recently given her a gift certificate for just such a class, so she signed up right away. Stepping into the school’s kitchen felt so great to Danielle that she had a strong feeling that she was exactly where she was meant to be. She felt so happy there, like she was finally in her element. This newfound joy was something she could get used to.

Implementing When the Task Seems Too Big

When the prospect of starting a new project seems too daunting because of its sheer size or just its newness, it’s natural to feel overwhelmed and let your nervous neurons get the better of you. This is especially true for the chronic procrastinator. If this rings a bell with you, a simplementation plan may be just what you need to get going. Martin was a corporate vice president who procrastinated by heeding the call to solve his colleague’s crisis du jour to the detriment of his own projects. He actually got a little rush of adrenaline every time he helped put out a fire and he enjoyed the sense of accomplishment. He finally conquered his penchant for putting off his own projects by igniting a little drama for himself.

Martin needed to present a report on the state of his industry to his company’s board of directors in three months’ time and had put off starting this enormous undertaking for several weeks already. The looming deadline made him nervous enough that he enlisted the help of one of his fellow vice presidents and asked her to hold him accountable for turning in the various analyses he needed to complete his white paper.

To raise the stakes, she invited him to share his findings at her weekly department head meetings. He ended each presentation with a promise of what he would discuss at the following meeting. By giving himself a deadline and a roomful of colleagues whose own work depended on his completing these tasks, he suddenly had a burning platform. While the idea of writing the magnum opus on the entire industry overwhelmed him and drove him to keep putting it off, each individual analysis was something he could wrap his brain around and accomplish. Having an audience for the individual components appealed to his desire to feel appreciated and created the sense of urgency that he needed to swing into action mode. It took advantage of his wiring and it worked like a charm. Martin finished his report with two weeks to spare.

Implementing When Fear Stands in the Way

Brenda’s math phobia had kept her from pursuing the college degree that was necessary for fulfilling her dream to have a career in management. A root cause analysis helped her identify the source of that problem—the middle school teacher who humiliated her in front of her classmates and told her she had no talent for math. It didn’t even take five whys to get to the core of her problem.

Why have I been unable to obtain a management position?

I don’t have the college degree most require.

Why don’t I have a college degree?

I’m afraid I can’t pass the math courses.

Why am I afraid of failing math?

My middle school teacher told me I have no aptitude for math.

Now that we knew the root of her problem, we could address it. In our coaching sessions, Brenda acknowledged that, in fact, she used mathematics every day in her job and that her teacher was simply wrong. But letting go of that long-held belief wasn’t as simple as it sounds. She had so fully identified with the label of math failure that accepting that the opposite was true required a leap of faith that was hard to take.

She was filled with dread as she prepared to register for her first college math course at age forty. Taking that initial step was so hard for her that we had to review her options. If she didn’t conquer her fear, it was highly unlikely she’d ever have the management career she so dearly desired. The opportunity cost of not taking that first step was high indeed. When asked what’s the worst that could happen if she did take the course, she said she might flunk out. She had to admit, however, that while it would be another blow to her self-esteem, she’d be no worse off than she already was. And if she conquered her fear, she just might have a shot at her dream. That was enough to drive her into action. She registered for her first class that very day.

If fear is holding you back, try asking yourself the same questions Brenda considered. Then determine for yourself what is more frightening—never reaching your full potential or facing down a worry that’s been limiting your prospects all along.

Implementing When Your Plan Isn’t Perfect Yet

Perfectionists often have trouble starting and finishing projects. Starting because the plan isn’t watertight. Finishing because it’s never 100 percent “right.” Well, I’ve got news for you. No matter how “right” you get your plan, you are most likely going to have to work with other people to make it all happen. People are messy creatures who seem to like doing things their own way. Try as you might, you will never be able to control everything and everyone. So you need to prepare as well as you can and then find the courage to let go.

If it helps, remind yourself you don’t have to be perfect to be helpful. In fact, showing your vulnerability just might be a gift that you can give to others. I once gave a talk at a high-stakes conference and was mortified when I couldn’t recall a word and stumbled through a short section of my speech. I was beside myself that these leaders of industry caught me in a moment of imperfection. So imagine my surprise—and delight—when the line of people coming up to talk to me at the end of the program snaked all the way out of the ballroom. One after another, the attendees thanked me for inspiring them and making the material so “relatable.” Those mumbling moments ended up being an important ingredient in the cement that created such a powerful bond with the audience. I won’t go so far as to recommend tripping over your words just to seem “real,” but do just take a deep breath and know that often “really good” is as close to perfect as you need to be.

Implementing When There Are
Not Enough Hours in the Day

“I don’t have enough time to . . .” is the common refrain of people with the yeah-but habit. There are so many things you’d like to be doing, but you just don’t have the time. But, there are too many other things competing for your attention. The buts never end. The fact is you have the same twenty-four hours a day that everyone else has. How you spend that time is an expression of your priorities. Without a doubt, there are many things you must do. But it’s unlikely that you can’t free up any time to accommodate a new priority. If that is the case, the new thing isn’t truly your highest priority.

If you find yourself in this position and you didn’t free up enough space on your schedule in the time and emotion exercise, there’s one more thing you can try.

You can perform something called a paired comparison test to assess whether everything that is currently on your calendar is more important and urgent than the new task you are having trouble accommodating.

To accomplish this, take out your notebook and your calendar. For each item on your schedule, assign an importance score from one (least important) to five (most important). Then do the same for each of the activities you’d like to accommodate that don’t currently fit. Create a grid like the one below and record the relative scores. The first number in each box is the importance of the item on the left side of the grid. The second number corresponds to the item along the top. This grid allows you to look at the relative importance of each entry in comparison with everything else on your schedule.

In this example, the new activity I want to add is reading trade journals. I believe this will add to my knowledge base and prepare me to achieve my goal of getting a promotion at work. It’s a top priority. When I look at everything else currently on my schedule, there’s not much there that isn’t a high priority. The only two things that don’t rank a five are my downtime activities of reading novels (which rates a four) and watching television (which rates a two). I need a little breathing time, so I’m not willing to give up both. But I see when I look at it this way that I generally prefer reading novels to watching TV. Because reading trade journals rates a five, I need to make time for that. So, reluctantly, I decide to give up television. Then I challenge my own all-or-nothing thinking and realize I don’t have to go cold turkey. If I read trade journals three days a week, I can probably keep up on the latest industry trends. That allows me to watch my favorite programs the other four days a week. Whew.

Try this exercise for yourself. If everything rates a tie, that tells you something already. Is everything you’re doing really as important as you think? If yes, go ahead and rank each item with an urgency score and repeat the comparison. What can wait and be done once you’ve accomplished something that is more time sensitive?

Take a critical look at your chart. Make some decisions; then make a switch. Or make peace with your assessment if you decide you’re already doing everything that is most urgent and important.

Just Get Moving

If creating your simplementation plan was simple for you, you’re ready to act. If it was less so, use all the tools in your kit and make your plan now. Then look at what you’ve committed to doing within the next day and do it. You are only a small first step away from making your dreams come true.

I know how frightening this can be. If I’d given in to my own fears, I wouldn’t have sung in public after my third-grade music teacher silenced me for decades. But I faced my deepest insecurity and here I am, stronger than ever, to tell the tale.

Whatever is holding you back, consider carefully whether you’re better off staying put or forging ahead. If you choose moving forward, realize that it’s unlikely to get easier, so you might as well hold your nose and jump. And once you’ve done it, you can jump for joy.

How Is It Going?

The hardest part is over. You’ve set out on your path and are on your way toward fulfilling your vision. If all is going well, you have added the grace notes that make each day a pleasure and fill your reservoirs of joy. You’re making steady progress and enjoying the journey.

But how do you know if it’s going well or not? Remember the importance of cultivating presence and awareness. Pay attention to how you feel and whether or not you are advancing toward the accomplishment of your goals. In keeping with your newly formed habits, you will not leave this to chance. You will schedule appointments on your calendar to check in at regular intervals to see how you’re doing.

Toolbox

Set Your Check-In Schedule

How often should you track your progress? The appropriate interval is determined by what you are trying to accomplish. Depending on what is on your list, you may want to track your initiatives separately. If one goal is to get in shape by exercising regularly, weekly reviews of your success in getting to the gym might be fitting. If you are working on the cure for cancer, you’ll have to give yourself a much longer time frame. While you’ll want to track your progress toward that overall goal, you are likely to have broken it down into several initiatives. Perhaps you are a scientist and you set goals of:

• Getting a job at an academic medical center

• Establishing a research laboratory

• Hiring a staff

• Securing funding

You will need to evaluate each of these goals on its own as well as in relation to one another. You’ll need the appointment at the medical school before you can establish a laboratory. You may get start-up funding when you land your job, but then you’ll have to demonstrate some results in order to get federal grants to continue your research.

Whatever your goals, give careful consideration to the appropriate time frame to measure your success. Choose a window that will give your strategy a sufficient opportunity to prove its worth, but not so much that you lose precious time if it isn’t effective. Be sure to do a careful assessment so you don’t continue to pursue activities that prevent your forward motion.

Once again, put a recurring appointment on your calendar to review your closet to ensure you are making good progress toward your goals. Many Business of Life graduates tell me that years after taking their class, they’re still looking in their closets to stay focused on their priorities. They make adjustments as necessary and enjoy seeing their successes. It simply works.

Enjoy the Ride

You are on your way. If you’ve completed all eight steps, you are well prepared to move toward the vision that sets you aglow. Stay present and alert to what you’re doing so you will continually make conscious choices about how you spend your precious time.

You can repeat any of the assessment and alignment exercises in this book periodically to make sure you stay the course or alter your approach if your evolving circumstances call for a change in direction. You will want to stick with your plans as long as they serve you, but you don’t want to be so rigid that you become stuck in a new rut. Be open to new possibilities. You now have a powerful framework for evaluating how well they fit into your plans.

As you saw with Martin’s experience, being accountable to someone else is a great way to ensure you make regular progress. Knowing that you will have to tell someone else what you’ve accomplished greatly increases the odds that you will have something significant to report. At the end of my Business of Life programs, everyone is assigned a buddy and I encourage them to schedule regular dates to check in with one another. I recommend you do the same. Find a friend or colleague who is interested in your undertaking. Schedule regular check-ins, whether by e-mail, phone, or in person, and take a few moments to update your “buddy” on your progress. Beyond giving you an incentive to keep moving, this serves as an opportunity to discuss any challenges you may be facing and brainstorm potential solutions.

One last thing: remember to celebrate your triumphs. Share your success stories. Honor your efforts and inspire someone else. That will add to your joy quotient—which in turn will fuel you to keep on keeping on.