by Richard Turner, with apologies to musicians everywhere[1]
<poem>
<verse>
<line>I once had a plan, or should I say, it once had me...</line>
<line>It showed me the way, never ask why, CMMI.</line>
</verse>
<verse>
<line>The plan said the task was too long for the schedule we had,</line>
<line>But Brooks said to add to the team would really be bad.</line>
</verse>
<verse>
<line>I re-scoped the plan, biding my time, fighting a whine.</line>
<line>We worked through phase two, the client then said, put this to bed.</line>
</verse>
<verse>
<line>She told us long lead-time was late and we sighed all around.</line>
<line>We told them quickly that our team was still within bounds.</line>
<line>And within a month we were in synch, back from the brink.</line>
<line>So, we smelled of rose, you may ask why, CMMI.</line>
</verse>
</poem>
<poem>
<verse>
<line>There is a team at Level One,</line>
<line>Chaotic work they do.</line>
<line>It’s been the ruin of many a career,</line>
<line>And Watts, I know it’s true.</line>
</verse>
<verse>
<line>They started work without a plan,</line>
<line>Too short of schedule and cash.</line>
<line>They struggled on against all odds,</line>
<line>But ended up in the trash.</line>
</verse>
<verse>
<line>Executives were fuming,</line>
<line>About the defects released.</line>
<line>The customers were lawyering up,</line>
<line>Convinced that they’d been fleeced.</line>
</verse>
<verse>
<line>The courtroom was all empty,</line>
<line>It never came to trial.</line>
<line>The settlement was a small country’s worth,</line>
<line>And all the lawyers just smiled.</line>
</verse>
<verse>
<line>Now Mothers tell your children,</line>
<line>Not to do what they have done.</line>
<line>To spend their lives in futile work,</line>
<line>On the team, that’s Level One.</line>
</verse>
</poem>
<poem>
<verse>
<line>Fagan says, it take’s a team I know;</line>
<line>But I can’t help peer reviewing you.</line>
</verse>
<verse>
<line>Shall I stay, break the process flow?</line>
<line>If I can’t help peer reviewing you.</line>
</verse>
<verse>
<line>Those process police,</line>
<line>Audit you and me,</line>
<line>Darling we’ll at least</line>
<line>Attempt a waiver, please.</line>
</verse>
<verse>
<line>Take my role, take my defects, too.</line>
<line>For I can’t help peer reviewing you.</line>
</verse>
</poem>
[1] This is just a sampling of the inane songs about process improvement written and performed, with little coaxing required, by Richard Turner. The Songbook of which they are a part, as well as Turner’s performances of them, may or may not be available for download from the Addison-Wesley Professional Web site, a decision that the publisher was still trying to avoid as we went to press.
..................Content has been hidden....................
You can't read the all page of ebook, please click here login for view all page.