Preface

Monkey Business

It has been said that you don't need much to catch a monkey—simply a container, tied down to something secure, with a hole cut out just large enough for the monkey to slip its hand inside. Place a banana inside the container and wait patiently. When the monkey reaches in to grab the banana, he quickly realizes that he is stuck, because his banana-grasping fist no longer fits through the original hole. All he needs to do to free himself of the trap is let go of the banana. But monkeys cling to the prize and try to force their way out of the trap. They tire themselves out, making them even easier to catch.

Silly monkey, right? After all, the monkey didn't need to be stuck in that trap. But he didn't know better. We humans would never do something like that.

Or would we?

How many times do we cling to the notion that life should be enjoyed as we destroy our health with high-calorie processed food and a sedentary lifestyle? How much can we enjoy life when we are sick—or worse, dead?

How many times must we catch ourselves just before getting into a serious accident as we multitask while driving or even walking because we crave being constantly connected to what else might be going on in the world?

How many stress symptoms, illnesses, or injuries do we need to suffer through before we recognize that our obsession with perfectionism enslaves us to crave more—despite wearing ourselves out to the point of exhaustion?

Learning to let go and creating healthy balance are constant challenges that everyone faces. The good news is that it isn't impossible to find freedom from the traps of life's tests. We simply need to retrain our bodies and brains to be more aware of the severity of unmanaged stress. We do this by learning how to become more flexible with what life throws at us—specifically, by becoming more resilient to the ups and downs and establishing a work-life rhythm that enables us to perform at our best without compromising our health and happiness.

It's a simple process, but that doesn't mean it will be easy. Take a deep breath, and know that if you follow the steps outlined in this book, you will be able to transform your relationship with stress. You'll let go of the traps that seduced you in the past and finally be free to find some branches to swing on.

My Name is Heidi, and I am a Stressaholic

I hate to admit it, but I am not naturally a happy person. I'm not an Energizer bunny, and I am certainly not calm amid chaos. I have struggled with anxiety and depression since childhood, and I am hypersensitive to stress and any stimulation. I hate bright lights, loud noises, and loud people. Crowded rooms make me uncomfortable, and I'm claustrophobic. I have a terrible fear of flying and public speaking; yet I make my living traveling as a professional speaker. I'm not a people person and consider myself to be a good wallflower at social events. I am a multitasker and a daydreamer, and like most other people I've met along my travels, I have self-diagnosed attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).

I am a work in progress. Although I've struggled to deal with my stress addiction at times, I have trained my brain to focus on the positive, creating a more optimistic lens through which to look at life. As a result, I have built a more resilient operating system—body, mind, and spirit—to help me experience and even welcome stress into my life without letting it break me down or burn me out. In the following pages, I share with you what I have learned through my experience as a stress addict, as well as from thousands of my clients who share my affliction. If you think you might be a stress addict, know that you are not alone. Also know that you can find peace from the constant battles to be everywhere at all times and to be everything to everyone. You can finally allow yourself the rest you need to create a healthy pulse for your life.