Introduction

What does it take to be a successful and happy mom entrepreneur? More importantly, what will it take for you to be a successful and happy mom entrepreneur? Because you’ve picked up this book, it’s likely that you either dream of starting a business or you already own one. Maybe you have nagging doubts about your ability to be both a mom and a business owner with the time you have available. Maybe you’re already doing both but feel as though you aren’t doing either as well as you’d like to. Or maybe you have so many details coming at you on a daily basis that you aren’t even sure where to put your focus.

We all have a different set of circumstances that make up our lives, and those circumstances are always shifting, so the experience of being both a mom and a business owner is different for each of us. There just isn’t a one-size-fits-all plan. But, by being really clear about who you are and what you want, and by setting up systems that take some of the guesswork out of your every decision, chances are good that you can create your very own winning combination and be as successful as you want to be. With the help of this book, you will craft a powerful and sustainable plan that will get you on your way to the happiness and satisfaction you deserve.

One thing we’ve seen again and again is that the road to success for a mom entrepreneur is not always straight. In fact, more often than not it’s quite crooked. It evolves with twists and turns along the way. Because of time constraints, conflicting priorities, and the constantly changing demands in our lives, our path just doesn’t follow the linear steps laid out in many business books. We can also just about guarantee that your success (and your business) will have stops and starts—and possibly complete stalls. And, in addition to measuring things like year-over-year sales and profit margins, moms need permission to use criteria such as fulfillment and satisfaction to evaluate achievement both in business and in life.

Here’s the thing about being a mom and a business owner: a different math applies. Often, we don’t have a 40-hour work week with eight dedicated hours a day. And, as we mentioned before, it’s usually not a linear path at all. It’s a big leap forward followed by a standstill. It’s long hours for two days followed by a day of not working much at all. It’s figuring out child care while also arranging a business trip. Or it’s trying not to feel guilty for truly enjoying what you do for a living. For many, it’s finishing the workday once the kids are in bed.

The journey of a mom entrepreneur often looks and feels…hmmmm, what’s a good word? Creative? Crooked? Crappy? Exhilarating? Exciting? Exhausting? Yes, it’s all of those things. And because it doesn’t necessarily follow an established series of steps along the way, you may be on the right path and not even realize it. You may be well on your way to creating all that you want and still think, Well, this can’t be right. It doesn’t look like what I thought it would look like. And, it sure as heck isn’t unfolding the way I thought it would. Guess what? It probably doesn’t and it most likely won’t. Noticing those discrepancies is a sign that you need to let go of what you thought it would be like and embrace the way it is.

We aren’t saying that you can just kick back, go with the flow, and see where it all takes you. Nope. We wholeheartedly believe in having a plan, and this book will help you with that. What we are saying, though, is that there is more than one way to get where you are going, and because your way will be based on the choices that are right for you, it will likely look different from what you think it should look like, and it will definitely look different from what you’ve seen in others’ lives. The great part is, if you follow along with this book, it will look like you and it will uniquely and fabulously fit with your life.

Having coached hundreds of mom entrepreneurs, we’ve noticed that owning a business doesn’t always lead to the happiness and sense of accomplishment that you might expect. Because mom entrepreneurs often dive in without fully considering their commitments and without making a comprehensive plan that addresses all the components of their lives, they can easily end up being pulled in several different directions. Let’s face it: being a mom and owning a business can feel like a real conflict at times. And, because moms who start businesses are usually seeking flexibility and some semblance of balance, many potentially successful mom entrepreneurs end up disappointed because they find themselves either working the long hours they were trying to avoid in the first place or feeling as though they were being pulled in several different directions.

After all, being your own boss means you are in charge—of everything. And we’re guessing that you bring the same high standards you learned and practiced while working for someone else into your own business. You want—and expect—the best in all areas of your life, so the pressure you put on yourself to excel can be intense. In fact, many mom entrepreneurs end up throwing in the towel before they’ve given their businesses a fair chance to get off the ground. Following our plan will allow you to keep moving toward your goals and will alleviate some of this pressure, making the whole journey feel a lot more manageable.

There will be challenges, of course, but women have some distinct strengths when it comes to running a business. We’ve all heard that a large portion of new businesses fail in the first year or two, but motherhood brings with it a useful perspective and set of skills that we believe can help increase your chances of success. According to a CBSNews report, women adapt better to new situations, make better managers and leaders, and invest more wisely than their male counterparts.¹ And according to a survey by Harvard Business Review, women are rated higher than men when it comes to building relationships.² In addition, motherhood fosters the ability to multitask, makes women experts at dealing with challenges as they come, and enhances both flexibility and problem-solving skills. Ultimately, living with multiple roles and conflicting priorities forces us to become effective and productive managers, which is one of the top skillsets we need as business owners.

The bottom line is that this journey is full of challenges, rife with possibilities, and, above all, unique for each and every mom entrepreneur. And, although that may seem like a grab bag of ambiguity, it’s actually quite liberating once you embrace it because it means that you don’t have to abide by the rules; your business doesn’t have to follow a certain trajectory, and how it all goes down is pretty much up to you.

We know this uncertainty can be disconcerting at first. In fact, things may not look at all the way you think they should or how you want them to look. Even with the large number of women jumping into this realm, being both a mom and an entrepreneur still involves largely uncharted territory. There is no paved trail for creating a business when so many of our priorities contradict each other. Our business is one of the things that we put our focus on, but we have so many others: our kids, our house, our partner (if we have one), our need to exercise, and our obsession with certain reality TV shows. So, how are we supposed to determine success and how do we achieve that success when there is not one clear way to get there?

We wish there was one master recipe, that if you mixed a little bit of hard work with tenacity and wisdom, you’d end up wildly successful. For a lucky few, that simple combination probably works. For others, long hours and passion can lead to toiling away for years and still not reaching the level of accomplishment they hope for. There are many things you can do, though, to affect the outcome. In Chapter 6 specifically, we’ll show you the different stages of business and what you can reasonably expect from each of them. In addition, from working with mom entrepreneurs throughout the years, we have homed in on some necessary foundational work that can be tremendously helpful for you and your well-being.

We’ve seen that establishing a solid foundation by being really clear about who you are, what your life is like, and what you want can launch you toward success more efficiently. We’ve observed that managing your time in an intentional way definitely adds to productivity and a sense of accomplishment. We’ve noticed that fully using the resources you have available as well as constantly adding to them is advantageous in many ways. And we know from our clients’ experience and from our own that you’ll need to be prepared to make adjustments along the way. We call it truing yourself up. Moms Mean Business presents the information you need to complete these essential steps, which means that, by reading and doing the exercises in this book, you’ll be on your way to the success you both want and deserve.

How do we know? We’ve been there. Heck, we are there! We are certified life and business coaches and we are mom entrepreneurs. We’ve written a book together, but our paths to this point were very different. We don’t claim to be sudden experts. We came by our knowledge honestly—by that we mean we’ve toiled and made mistakes, and fumbled, and persevered. We’ve both had moments that made us wonder if what we are doing is worth our time and effort. We’ve also had times when we’ve pinched ourselves to make sure this whole thing isn’t all a glorious dream. Mostly, we’ve had days filled with choices, and priorities, hard work, hiccups, and contentment.

In addition to having our own experiences to draw from, we also coach other mom business-owners so we’ve seen how this quest looks for a lot of different women. The good news again: it looks different for everyone. The bad news again: it looks different for everyone. There is no easy-to-follow template for managing a successful life while you strive to also create a successful business. But, by capitalizing on your strengths, using all of your resources, creating a plan, mapping out your time, holding yourself accountable, and taking care of yourself along the way, we think your chances of success increase—greatly.

To show you what we mean, we’ve enlisted the help of some real-life mom entrepreneurs. Women, and perhaps moms in particular, are eager to hear how others manage it all. We are constantly looking for tips on how to move forward, how to handle everything that comes our way, how to create success on our own terms, and how to keep our sanity throughout the process. This is just as true when it comes to our businesses. When other women are willing to pull back the curtain to show us what life looks like from their perspective, it is beyond inspiring. In fact, the best lessons in life are often learned through trials and tribulations—our own and those of others. Stories of overcoming obstacles and learning from mistakes are powerful teachers, so we hope you’ll benefit greatly from the words of wisdom provided by a group of mom entrepreneurs we admire.

Throughout Moms Mean Business, we’ll peek into the lives of some of today’s most successful mom business-owners, giving you a behind-the-scenes view of how they make their lives work—both personally and professionally. Watch for their stories in the “Moms Talk” sections you’ll find included in each chapter. Luckily, moms who are farther down the path are usually more than willing to share their experience, especially if they know it will be helpful to someone else.

Is there a secret to these moms’ success? Of course there is, and it’s all in the approach they take from the start. Growing and managing a business that is designed to fit in with their already-full lives is the key to creating the fulfillment and satisfaction they had imagined. Moms Mean Business shows you how to do it too.

We hope the stories and words of wisdom will make the journey more recognizable and achievable for you. We hope you’ll find inspiration and that all-important “me too!” factor. You may even find some remarkable similarities to your own situation. Just remember, your path is yours alone so it doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. In fact, take this book as a permission slip: you are hereby given permission to have your trek toward being a successful mom entrepreneur reflect you and the life you lead. We’ll say it again: it doesn’t have to look a certain way and it may not closely resemble anyone else’s journey—in fact, it probably won’t. Just take the insight that you find useful and apply it to your life.

We know your time as a mom and a business owner is limited, which is why we have kept this book short, sweet, and accessible. Here’s what you can expect:

Part I is the foundational first step: you have to know yourself, you have to acknowledge your priorities and values, you have to take stock of your circumstances, and you have to know how all of these inform you as you make decisions about your future. In Part I, we’re going to hold up a mirror so you can see where you are today and get clear about where you want to go. We’ll start with a quick but informative assessment so you can see how you’re doing, then lead you through some exercises so you can articulate all of the things that are important to you. Then we’ll have you envision what you want for the future, creating your own definition of success in the process. Because it’s the number-one issue moms deal with, you will also take a close look at your time: how you spend it, how you can use it more effectively, and how you can protect it.

Because you are the most important component of all this, we’ll show you how to build in the time and a plan for self-care. This will allow you to make huge strides forward while acknowledging the importance of your well-being. Owning a business while being a mom has the potential for burnout, so you’ll need to build in some time to relax, play, exercise, and just be. So many women put themselves at the bottom of their to-do lists, which is such a huge mistake. If you want to have a thriving business while raising a thriving family, you’ll need to build in some time for yourself to thrive as well. We’ll help you decide what that looks like for you so that it becomes automatic and guilt-free. All of this groundwork will create a solid foundation from which to launch or grow your business. This initial work is a crucial and often overlooked first step for mom entrepreneurs looking for success and satisfaction.

Part II is about getting your business from Point A to Point B, and managing it all. You will take stock of your strengths, skills, past experiences, and other valuable resources so you can leverage them as you start or grow as an entrepreneur. You will also determine what stage your business is in, create a business plan, and determine how best to move forward in a way that meshes with who you are and what you envision as well as with the time you have available. We’ll address productivity and introduce specific time-management techniques and tools that will help you accomplish more in less time. You will also create a personalized system of accountability that will enable you to do the things you want to do. Accountability is a straightforward and easy-to-use tool that will help you stay on track. Don’t be fooled by its simplicity, though. It is a powerful little puppy. We’ll also talk about how to handle the dips, delays, roadblocks, and other frustrations that you are sure to meet along the way so that when you do, you can learn from them, recover quickly, and keep moving forward. By the end of Part II, you will know what you need to do, when you need to do it, and how you’ll get it done.

Whether you’re just starting out or growing an existing business, we know it takes a lot to succeed as both a mom and a business owner. Along the way, we’ll root for you from the pages. Consider us your personal professional coaches and also your cheerleaders (though not the kind who wear those short skirts and have glitter in their hair). Moms Mean Business is a powerful, portable reference book that helps you create a successful and happy life as a mom entrepreneur. The point is, we know you can do it, and we’re here to offer you as much support along the way as we possibly can. Enjoy the stories and interviews from the women who have gone before you. Enjoy the process of figuring out what will work best for you. And enjoy the time and effort that goes into creating something that supports you, fulfills you, and lets you know just what you can do when you put your mind to it. You’ve got this. We just know it!