INDEX

accommodating behavioral mode, 22–23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 61, 213

accommodation, of change, 67

action, 80, 173–80, 217–18

plan, 110

to relieve stress, 164–65

steps, 109

activity-centered life, 37

Adams, John Quincy, 195

advice, 175–76

Aesop, 118

affirmations, 96–97

alcohol abuse, 122

Alexander the Great, 193, 194

Alford, Larry, 52–53

alternatives, 106, 109, 189

“and then some” doctrine, 160–61

annoyances, 168–69

application, 174

Aristotle, 206

arts, 152–53

Aurelius, Marcus, 76

badlands metaphor, 206

balance, 113, 115, 216

in eating habits, 116

in exercise, 116–17

mental and emotional, 124–25, 216

in personal habits, 121–23

in sleep habits, 119–21

social, 139–44, 216

spiritual, 147, 148, 149–53, 216

in work and play, 117–19, 142–44

barnyard metaphor, 207–8

Barrymore, Ethel, 169

Baryshnikov, Mikhail, 17

Battle of Midway, 46

Battle of Stalingrad, 81

Bay of Pigs, 81

beginnings, 194, 203–8

behavioral modes, 20–27, 212–13

benchmarking, 185

Berra, Yogi, 132

bodily-kinesthetic intelligence, 13

Bogues, Muggsy, 50

boring routines, 167

box canyon organizations, 204–5

Bradley, Omar N., 26

brain, 72–73, 157–58. See also left brain; right brain

brainstorming, 107

breakfast, 167–68

breaks, 169

briar patch, 205–6

brokers, 201

Brown, H. Jackson, Jr., 54, 80

Burton, Richard, 1

Caesar, Julius, 58

career(s)

and best use of talent, 27, 28

change of, 198–99

compatible, 16, 17–19, 212

and congenial competency, 29

satisfaction in, 16–20

skills for, 199–200

terrain types, 204–8

trends in, 200–202

See also work

Carnevale, Anthony Patrick, 200

Carter, Jimmy, 127, 195

causes, 159

challenge(s), 54, 66, 159, 166

change, 39, 197–202, 218

as norm, 65–69

preparing for, 61–65

welcoming, 60

Cheney, Lynne V., 151

choices, 34–39

drifting into, 35

important versus urgent, 99

Churchill, Winston, 12, 26, 51

circumstances, 49

becoming prisoner of, 92

bypassing, 74–76

creating new, 77

as starting point, 90, 91

Clay, Henry, 23

Columbus, Christopher, 148

commitment, 2, 55–85, 214–15

compared with decision, 57

making a clean break, 82–85

and reengineering one's life, 77–78

and saying good-bye to the past, 59--69

and transforming oneself, 78–82

community, 141–42

compatible career, 16, 17–19, 212

complacency, 207

conflict, 132–33

congenial competency, 16–17, 28–29, 212

congenial role, 16, 17, 19–20, 25, 27, 30, 84, 212

conscious choices, 34–39

conscious mind, 126

core motivations, 33, 37

Covey, Stephen, 194

Cranshaw, Ralph, 64

creativity, 66–67, 107–8, 157–58

crisis stage, 101

criticism, 187

Crosby, Bill, 153

culture, 79–80

cycles, 194

decision(s), 2, 5–54, 212–14

and art of the possible, 45–54

compared with commitment, 57

in harmony with principles, 39

system for making, 188–90

and values, 31–44

delayed gratification, 101

delegation, 168, 178

desire, 75–76

De Voto, Bernard, 78

Diamond, Marian, 157

diet, 116

difficult situations

outside one’s control, 50–51, 53

resulting from behavior of others, 50

See also problems

discouragement, 128

Disraeli, Benjamin, 74

Donne, John, 156

Dostoevsky, Feodor, 152

downsizing, 198–99

dreaming, 73

drug abuse, 122

eating habits, 116

Edison, Thomas, 13, 47, 182

education, 78, 199, 202, 206

Einstein, Albert, 148, 149, 151

Eisenhower, Dwight, 22–23, 26–27, 81

Eliot, T. S., 194

Ellerbee, Linda, 169

Emerson, Ralph Waldo, 131, 147, 148–49

emotional preparation, 124–37. See also mental/emotional balance

endorphins, 158–59, 217

engaging behavioral mode, 21–22, 24, 213

entrepreneurial mentality, 202

excuses, 82–83

execution, 2–3, 171–9O, 217–18

exercise, 116–17, 159

expectations, 68, 134, 194

experience, 184–85, 202

experimentation, 184

expertise, 179

extroverts, 22

failures. See productive mistakes

family, 139–41

closeness, 158, 213–14

goals, 95–96

fear, 163, 217

Feather, William, 82

feedback, 186–88

financial troubles, 100–10I

flexibility, 53–54

focusing, 13–14

on the possible, 51–53

on talents, 14

on what’s important, 101–102

food, 116

force field, 73

Ford, Henry, 1

Franklin, Benjamin, 163

Franks, Frederick, 52

friends, 144, 159

fulfillment, 150

future, 58, 59, 62, 69, 218–19

creating, 70–76, 215

preparing for, 60, 89

Gardner, Howard, 12

genius, 13

gloominess, 128–30, 136–37

goals, 71, 91–97, 215–16

action toward, 173–74

advertising, 97

ambitious, 134

benefits of setting, 94

breaking into doable tasks, 92, 215

immediate, 93, 177

including all aspects of life in, 95

measurable, 94–95, 182–83

organizational and family, 95–96

planning backward from vision, 93–94

steps to reaching, 109

strategies for, 104–10

turning into affirmations, 96–97

types of, 93

green pastures metaphor, 206–7

groundwork, 116–77

habits, 67, 186

Hall, Jay, 53

Hammerstein, Oscar, 150

Hannibal, 89

happiness, 149, 152, 154

Harris, Joel Chandler, 205

hatred, 153

Hawking, Stephen, 51, 115

healthy habits, 67

hesitation, 212

hobbies, 167

Holmes, Oliver Wendell, Sr., 78

honesty, 165

Hoover, Herbert, 195

Horace, 211

Horovitz, Israel, 140

hugs, 158

humor, 67

ideas, 107

imagination, 107, 151

immediate goals, 93, 177

imperfections, 166, 168

incompetence, 165

inertia, 161–62

inhibitions, 122

innovation, 19

inspiration, 147–49, 153

intangibles, 149–50

intelligence, types of, 12–13

interpersonal conflict, 133

interpersonal intelligence, 13

interpersonal relationships, 101–2. See also people skills

intrapersonal intelligence, 13

introverts, 22, 23

intuition, 147

issues, 188–90

Jefferson, Thomas, 161, 195

Jesus Christ, 147, 148

Johnson, Lyndon, 142

Johnson, Samuel, 163

Jones, Carl, 18

Jordan, Michael, 1, 17, 129

journal writing, 68

Jung, Carl, 147, 151

Kant, Immanuel, 150

Keller, Helen, 46, 83

Kennedy, John, 81

Khrushchev, Nikita, 81

King, Pearl M., 185

Kipling, Rudyard, 124, 128

knowledge, 155, 179, 183–85

and creativity, 66-fJ7

cultivating, 144–45

See also learning

Korean War, 27

Korthoff, Herbert, 84–85

Kouzes, James M., 141

language, 12

laughter, 169

layoffs, 199

learning, 174, 181–82

formal, 183

incidental, 185–86

informal, 183–85

mentality, 183–86, 218

See also knowledge

left brain, 72, 90, 96, 108

leisure activities, 144

Lincoln, Abraham, 39, 51, 152, 197

linguistic intelligence, 12

lists, 105

logical-mathematical intelligence, 12

long-range goals, 93

loose ends, 179–80

Lorelli, Michael x., 83–84

love, 153

MacArthur, Douglas, 26, 27

machines, 154–55

manners, 79–80

manufacturing personnel, 201

Marais, Jan So, 169

marijuana, 122

marriage, 139

Marshall, George C., 26

Maslow, Abraham, 138

material possessions, 36–37, 146

maximum, 113–14

McKinley, William, 142

mealtime, 140

medium-range goals, 93

memories, 152

mental/emotional balance, 124–25, 216

mental preparation, 124–37

meticulous behavioral mode, 23, 24, 61, 213

Michelucci, Ernesto, 197

Miller, Herman, 122

minimum, 113

mission statement, 74–75, 90

mistakes, 181–82, 184, 218

Moore, Marianne, 67

morale, 157–59, 169, 217

motivation

core, 33, 37

pain and reward for, 63–64

Murray, William, 80

muscles, 117

musical intelligence, 13

Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, 24

needs hierarchy, 138

negative feedback, 186–88

negative/negative personal conflict, 133

negative stress, 164–69, 217

new experiences, 64–65

niches, 205–6

noise, 168

Normandy invasion, 26, 81

nutrition, 116

opportunities, 178–79, 203–4, 211

optimum, 113–14

O’Reilly, Brian, 204

organizational goals, 95–96

organizational success, 20

organizational vision, 162–63

pain, 63–64, 161–62, 217

paper shuffling, 103

past, 59, 68

patience, 131–32

Patton, George, 26, 27

Peale, Norman Vincent, 169

people skills, 200

perceptions, 166

Performax personal profiles, 24, 25

personal conflict, 132–33

person-centered life, 35–36

perspective, 67, 130–31

pessimism, 126

physical fitness, 115–23. See also exercise

planning, 2, 87–110, 215–16

backward from vision, 93–94

characteristics of good, 89–90

goal setting, 91–97

one step at a time, 91–92

and priorities, 98–103

strategies, 104–10

pleasure, 8, 162, 217

positive attitude, 89

positive feedback, 186–88

positive/negative personal conflict, 133

positive/positive personal conflict, 132–33

positive stress, 159–64, 217

positive thinking, 126–27

Posner, Barry Z., 141

possession-centered life, 36–37

possibilities, 45–54

focusing on, 51–53

mistaking difficult for impossible, 50–54

picking one’s battles, 46–47

and situational triage, 47–49

preparation, 2, 111–69, 216–17

for change, 61–65

for future, 60

mental and emotional, 124–37

physical, 115–23

social, 138–45

spiritual, 146–56

Presley, Elvis, 146, 147

pride, 163, 217

principle-centered life, 37–38

principle(s), 214

and decision making, 41–44, 48–49

definition of, 32

in harmony with decisions, 39

identifying and guiding, 39–40

importance of, 31–32

priorities, 98–103, 216

proactive approach, 49, 53, 98

problems

financial, 100–101

levels of, 99–102

stating, 105–6

See also difficult situations

productive mistakes, 181–82, 218

professionals, 78–79, 201

quality, 118, 188

questioning, 151

reactive approach, 49, 98

reality, 32–33, 73

recommitment, 3, 191–208, 218–19

relaxation, 117–19, 167–68

religion, 148

resignation, 66

Resnick, Judith, 152

resources, 176

responsibility, 135

reward, 63–64

Richfield, Lew, 85

right brain, 72–73, 90, 96

risk taking, 83–85, 163, 164

Roosevelt, Franklin, 26, 51, 115

routine tasks, 102–3

rule of conduct, 32

Russell, Bertrand, 148

Ruth, Babe, 75

ruts, 62–63, 161

sacrifice, 156

Santayana, George, 147, 149

satisfaction, 16, 194

self-blame, 129

self-esteem, 129

self-estimate, 160

self-reliance, 135

self-understanding, 13

self-worth, 125–27

service clubs, 142

Shakespeare, William, 67

sharing, 167

Shaw, George Bernard, 65, 152

Sheldon, W.H., 203

short-term goals, 93

situational triage, 47–49

skills, 199–200

sleep, 72–73, 119–21

Smith, Preston, 19, 71, 72

smoking, 121–22

social balance, 139–44, 216

social relations, 138–45

society, 139

spatial intelligence, 12

spiritual balance, 147, 148, 149–53, 216

spiritual preparation, 146–56

and inspiration, 147–49

Stengel, Casey, 25

Stevenson, Robert Louis, 64, 115, 152

storyboard, 108

strategies

for reaching goals, 104–10

stress-reduction, 169

work, 143

stress, 217

action to relieve, 164–65

antidotes to, 167–69

negative, 164–69, 217

picking one’s battles, 166–67

positive, 159–64, 217

subconscious mind, 96, 134

success

begetting success, 53–54

and behavioral mode, 27

and career choices, 16

eagerness for, 68–69

expecting, 134–35

in one’s own terms, 8–9

small, 178

suggestions, 107

Sullivan, Louis, 121

systems, 102–3

Taft, William Howard, 195

talent, 1–2, 11–12

and career choice, 27, 28

exercise to identify, 15

focusing, 14

as form of intelligence, 12

and satisfaction, 16

tasks

doable, 92

routine, 102–3

taste, 79–80

teamwork, 20, 201

technical skills, 200

technical specialists, 201

television, 140

tentativeness, 81–82, 179

time

management, 177–78

sense of, 151

timetable, 177

time travel, 61–62

tobacco, 121–22

top-gun behavioral mode, 21, 24, 26, 27, 212–13

Torres, Jose, 164

transformation, of self, 78–82

triage, 47–49

Truman, Harry, 142

Twain, Mark, 184

Ullman, Samuel, 153

unconscious choices, 34–39

unconscious mind, 126

universe, 150, 151

value(s), 31–44, 214

and choices, 34–39

and decision making, 41–44, 48–49

definition of, 32

importance of, 31–32

intangibles, 149–50

variety, 167

vision(s), 70–76, 90, 160, 193, 194

visualization, 134–35

Walker, T. J., 18

Walsh, Bill, 21I

wealth, 149

weight, 1I6

Wells, H. G., 69

Whitman, Walt, 150

Wind, Jerry, 143

Wolfe, Thomas, 14

wonderment, 150

work, 8, 168

balance in, 117–19, 142–44

downsizing, 198–99

hours, 118–19

strategies, 143

See also career(s)

workaholics, 118, 139

worker mentality, 78–79

Xerox Corporation, 188

youth, 153

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Nido Qubein came to America, learned the English language, and went on to become living proof that this is still the land of opportunity. His life has been an amazing success story.

He is chairman of an international consulting firm serving clients across the United States and in a dozen other countries. He serves on the boards of seventeen universities, companies, and community organizations, including the National Speakers Association Foundation, American Humanics, High Point University, Mount Olive College, the Bryan School of Business and Economics, Southern National Corporation, Northpointe Partners, and McNeill Lehman. In his home city of High Point, North Carolina, he is an active director of the Chamber of Commerce, YMCA, Economic Development Cooperation, Regional Hospital Foundation, Salvation Army Endowment Board, and Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church. He has served as chairman of the United Way Campaign, March of Dimes, and YMCA Capital Campaign, among others.

Nido is the author of more than a dozen books and scores of audio and video programs that are distributed worldwide. He addresses more than a hundred business and professional groups around the world each year, and is a past president of the prestigious National Speakers Association. His foundation provides scholarships to thirty deserving young people each year. To date, the Qubein Foundation has granted more than three hundred scholarships, worth almost a million dollars.

Nido has been the recipient of many honors, including a Doctor of Laws degree from his alma mater, the Cavett (known as the Oscar of the speaking profession), the Sales and Marketing International Hall of Fame, Distinguished Citizen from the Chamber of Commerce, recipient of the Piedmont Entrepreneurs Roundtable, and the Free Enterprise Award from Amway International.