Chapter 10
Mind Mechanics
We have talked a lot about the way we perceive the world and how it influences our reality. In order for us to take control of our life and the results we produce, it might be important to first look at the mechanics of how this actually happens.
Let’s begin by having a look at the three parts of this process — the conscious mind, the unconscious (or subconscious) mind, and our physiology. I have often heard the conscious mind described as the captain of our brain. It gives directions and tells the unconscious mind what to do. The unconscious mind becomes the crew. The crew doesn’t think for itself — it just does what it’s told. Our physiology is thus profoundly shaped by our conscious and unconscious mind.
Mind Language
Captain: We make a perception or interpret an experience.
Crew: The unconscious mind accepts this interpretation.
Outcome: The body then aligns itself with this input.
Let’s go into a bit more detail.
Captain
The first stage is about how we perceive the world. We chat inside our head all the time. Chat, chat, and more chat. Most of us are completely oblivious to the conversations, interpretations, and perceptions that go on between our ears. If we are to take control of how we react and behave, we must listen to this internal voice.
What are you telling yourself right now? You may be saying, “This is really interesting. I’ve never looked at it that way before.” Or you may be saying, “This is so confusing!” Whatever we say inside will determine what happens for us outside. As we’ve discussed earlier, our perception creates our reality. How we perceive anything determines our reaction to it, emotionally, physically, and biologically. The biggest challenge is that most of us don’t own the talk that goes on inside our heads. We can easily talk in a way that disempowers us, and those around us, and not even be aware of it. A common example of this is when we make someone or something else responsible for how we feel. For example, “Public speaking makes me terrified!” It isn’t the public speaking that makes us terrified, it’s our perception of public speaking that creates these debilitating feelings. When we own our perceptions and thoughts, we can then consider how to reframe our perception so that it has a less hindering effect on us.
Crew
In the second stage, our unconscious mind accepts this perception as truth.
Our unconscious mind instantly accepts whatever we tell ourselves, because our unconscious mind doesn’t know the difference between fact and fiction. This is why it’s crucial to pay attention to the actual language and dialogue we use. Take, for example, relationships. It’s easy to criticize and complain about our partners, but just think how damaging it is to the relationship when one or both parties think that sarcastic quips are a form of humor. Sarcasm requires making a joke at someone else’s expense. And even after the “Sorry — only joking, honey” has come and gone, the damage has been done. That moment has been recorded in the unconscious mind. Twenty years into a relationship, we may be surprised to hear a couple say, “I don’t know why, we just don’t seem to love each other anymore.” Yet their unconscious minds are screaming, “I know the reason! It’s because we keep saying all of those horrible things to each other, and we believe them!” And then we wonder why we fall out of love.
Right after the unconscious mind receives a message, the third stage occurs.
Outcome
In the third stage, the body aligns itself to the unconscious mind. Whatever perception we register, the unconscious mind accepts, and in turn the body just follows, aligning itself.
a) Captain — conscious mind
Perception: You tell yourself there is a monster in the cupboard.
b) Crew — unconscious mind
Interpretation: The unconscious mind then accepts this as truth. It says, “Well, you know far better than I do, so I believe you,” at which point it sends a message directly to the body, and then...
c) Outcome — physiology
Alignment: The body aligns itself to the unconscious mind and the perception. It creates a biological response that produces chemicals to make you feel terrified.
This process occurs in many areas of our lives and can wreak havoc. Here’s an example that I’m sure a lot of couples can relate to. At a large social gathering, you see your partner speaking to a very attractive person. You happen to be feeling insecure about yourself of late, and in that moment you form a perception that your partner is flirting. If you apply the process, what emotions might you experience in your body? Jealousy, rage, sadness? These emotions are a result of your perception of the situation, not of the situation itself. A few moments later, you discover that the attractive person is your partner’s cousin, and almost instantly your emotions change because now you have a different perception.
Candace Pert, Ph.D., a celebrated molecular biologist and psychoneuroimmunologist and author of Molecules of Emotion: The Science Behind Mind-Body Medicine, discovered that the existence of peptides and their receptors demonstrates how the mind and body communicate: we actually have biochemical reactions to mental and emotional stimuli — our everyday thoughts and feelings. After decades of research, Dr. Pert finally made clear how emotion creates the bridge between mind and body and has coined a term for it: “bodymind.”
To really simplify it, our emotions are a chemical reactions to a thought — to our perceptions — so that everything we feel emotionally we have actually created. How we feel then affects how we interpret the world, and we create either Flipman energy or Pitman energy.