7 Coping with feelings of isolation

When people switch from working in an office to working from home, they often find that they miss the social side of working life. The natural contacts of the daily commute, bumping into friends in the kitchen, and the general banter of office life perhaps with lunches or after-work activities may be things you’re happy to give up in practice, but how will you cope with the reality of working from home?

Step one: Use some tools to keep you in contact with others

Even if you’re someone who likes their own company, it can be lonely to spend a lot of the day or the week on your own. It’s important to keep in touch with colleagues when you work from home for all sorts of reasons, but even more so if you get a boost from being in touch with others. The key here is ease of connection.

Start by making sure people can contact you easily when they want to. Some suggestions are given below. Obviously you don’t need to implement all of them, but the more connection methods you have and the easier you make contact, the more likely people are to take the trouble to get in touch and keep in touch:

reliable telephone line

separate home and business telephone lines

answer phone with a friendly message encouraging people to leave a message

broadband Internet connection so that phone calls can be taken while you’re online

reliable, fast Internet service provider

e-mail account

e-mail signature that includes contact information, so that every message reminds people of the other ways they can get in contact

mobile phone that receives a good signal at home

voicemail on the mobile phone with a friendly message

regular contacts given correct telephone number and e-mail address to use

instant messaging available

webcam and videoconferencing software set up and ready to use

your entire contact network updated with your contact

details at least once a year

TOP TIP

Make some noise! For some people, lack of noise in their environment is a constant reminder that they are alone. If you’re not enjoying birdsong from the garden and find the silence a little too deafening, putting on some low-key music or turning on the radio for background noise can be a good addition to your home office.

Step two: Make the most of ‘socials’

Even though you may have moved out of an office environment, it’s a good idea to attend relevant training sessions to boost your skills or just keep in the loop. Similarly, if your employing organisation is in a state of flux, make sure you attend meetings about major changes that are taking place so that you’re in touch with your colleagues and they remember that you’re affected by potential rejigging too.

Keeping in touch doesn’t have to be a chore, and social events are a great way of staying visible.

Go to all events you’re invited to, such as the Christmas party, product launches, and leaving dos. At these events in particular, you’ve a perfect opportunity to introduce yourself to new members of the team in a relaxed situation.

This will mean that staff turnover doesn’t contribute to any feelings of isolation you may have.

Take responsibility for staying in contact in between social events and always think of the ball as being in your court.

Step three: Make regular contact with support workers

When you work under pressure in an office environment, there are usually people around you who can sympathise or spread the load. Delegating even small parts of a task not only makes a physical impression on the work to be done, but also has a positive psychological effect and can therefore reduce the burden considerably. When you come under pressure in your home office, there’s a distance barrier between you and your support system, and this is when feelings of isolation are most likely to kick in.

Regardless of the type of work that you do, there are usually some people that you rely on or work closely with.

Be friendly with your team and colleagues in regular, positive but brief phone calls or e-mails. Ask light, open questions such as ‘what’s new?’ that will prompt them to update you with all the gossip and changes afoot. Remember that you need to give something back, so encourage them to share their ups and downs with you and offer support and laughs in return.

Keeping in touch like this helps you in two ways: you learn what’s going on in the office and you keep your office-based colleagues onside and friendly, which will be important when you need their help. If you’ve got into the habit of having these ‘chats’ and supporting others by phone, you will feel less alone when you are the one needing help or a friendly ear.

Step four: Join or start a local group for people in the same boat

This one isn’t for everyone but a joining or setting up a group of like-minded home-workers or a professional group with interests in your field could be just the source of contacts you need to avoid isolation.

Meet for breakfast, lunch, dinner, or drinks and get to know members personally as well as at a professional level. If you offer support to others they are likely to reciprocate when your spirits are in need of a lift. These environments will also help you to build your network and can be very constructive for your career.

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Don’t put yourself under extra pressure by thinking you’re the only home-worker who feels isolated. Compared with the busy office environment you’re used to, you’re bound to feel alone at times in your new work environment. It may help to know that there are many other home-workers just like you locally, thousands like you regionally and millions around the globe. The number is increasing rapidly. You can get in touch with them through the Internet, in chat rooms and via professional bodies or trade-related sites. If it gets too much, take your laptop out to lunch or for a coffee! The change of scene will do you good; just being in a restaurant or café environment with people around you making a bit of noise and bustle can be enough to make the difference.

Step six: Remember you’re not super-human

Some people are very resourceful and self-reliant in their working style, preferring to carry out their work alone and solve their problems by themselves. If this sounds like you, you may also recognise the tendency to shoulder all the pressure and ‘be strong’. Toughing out busy periods in this way can put a lot of stress on your system, so confide in people you trust and admit it if you need help – this isn’t a sign of weakness. No one can be strong all the time and if you don’t allow others to help you, you’re adding unnecessary pressure to your load.

TOP TIP

Slot in a regular sanity check by setting aside some time each week where you stop to consider how you’re feeling. Having some time out to think about yourself, rather than all your other tasks, will help you take action to get the contact you need before feelings of slight loneliness turn into more serious isolation blues.

Common mistakes

You bombard your partner with questions

If you work at home and your partner or housemate works in a busy environment, you may recognise this scenario. You’ve spent the day closeted away, without anyone to share your thoughts, and could really use a good chat. But what if your partner is feeling drained by the constant distractions or demands of others in his or her work environment and just wants to be left alone? Your needs at the end of the day are likely to be quite different, so be sensitive and give some time and space where it’s required.

You go too far the other way

Having encouraged visitors to drop by to stave off isolation, you may find that once people know you’re at home they turn up too often and stay for too long. The best solution, as you can imagine, is all about balance: for productivity’s sake you may need to set a few parameters to manage this type of distraction without discouraging it completely.

You have too many ‘virtual’ contacts

The Internet can be great for making contact with others in your field or other home-workers, but this level of interaction will never replace real one-to-one human communication. Even if you’re pushed for time, it’s well worth making the effort to talk to people face-to-face regularly.

STEPS TO SUCCESS

Before you take the plunge of working from home full time, think about whether you’re naturally suited to it or whether you’re likely to find it lonely and tough. If you do go ahead, make some plans about how you’ll get enough contact with other people to keep you happy.

Make sure that you have the tools of your home-working trade set up from day one. The first few weeks can be very demanding after you change your work environment, and you may feel the need to prove yourself as a successful home-worker. You don’t need to be coping with technology teething problems on top of all this pressure.

Home-working doesn’t necessarily mean that you never visit your colleagues or see the whites of your boss’s eyes! You can still attend important meetings, training and social events.

Make sure that you keep on top of changes back at the office by your informal contact with colleagues and support workers. The onus will be on you to make contact and ask questions. You don’t need to be heavy-handed about this; a simple e-mail or phone call to say hello, and to ask how things are, is all you need.

Make new contacts in your local area so that you don’t rely too heavily on calls to your work colleagues for support. The advantages are that you will increase your network at the same time as getting the face-to-face contact you require.

Create a backdrop of (appropriate!) noise if you find silence oppressive. Having music blaring out might not be the best idea (especially if you find yourself scrabbling to find the ‘off’ button on your stereo when your boss rings you unexpectedly), but low-key music or talk radio will help you feel as if you’re not completely on your own.

Don’t let ‘being strong’ become your Achilles heel; you’re only human and there’s only so much you can take on and do well. Ask for help if you need it rather than struggling on.