Preparing for a dismissal meeting

First, make sure you’ve done all the background work: Have you documented the employee’s performance or behavior problems and the steps you’ve taken to help him or her improve? Have you consulted your company’s legal and human resource departments regarding the dismissal regulations unique to your situation? Have you processed the difficult emotions associated with this decision?

You want to feel confident that dismissing the person is the right thing to do—for him or her, for your team, and for your company. The really tough part of the dismissal could be breaking the news to the affected employee. However, if you have done a good job of providing performance feedback to the employee, the dismissal should not come as a complete surprise. Still, unfortunately, some companies have suffered severe repercussions after dismissing someone. A dismissed employee may deliver an angry or destructive outburst or inflict threatening letters or phone calls on the company. He or she might also sabotage company assets or launch (or threaten) a wrongful-dismissal lawsuit.

By handling the dismissal thoughtfully, you can do your best to ensure that none of these things happen. Certainly, there is no easy way to implement a dismissal. However, you can mitigate the amount of pain the affected employee will experience and protect your company from legal or other kinds of retribution by being careful about when, where, and how you dismiss an employee, and about what you say during this critical discussion.

When to schedule the meeting

Some experts advise against dismissing an employee on a Friday afternoon. A dismissal notice just before a weekend may cause the person to stew over the weekend and possibly ponder a lawsuit or think about returning to the office with disruptive intentions.

Consider scheduling a meeting on a Monday afternoon. That way, he or she has all week to start looking for another job, and you’ll minimize the impact of the dismissal notice on other employees.

Under some circumstances, you may want to allow time for good-byes. However, don’t let the dismissed employee mix with other workers for too long unless you can trust that he or she is not going to express extreme criticism of the action to other employees. If you do allow good-byes, identify whom the employee is allowed to meet with and for how long.

Where to hold the meeting

Meet with the employee in a place that keeps both of you out of plain sight, such as a windowless conference room or office, or some other space that gives you complete privacy. Also, arrange for a path to and from the meeting to avoid areas that are likely to be populated by curious coworkers.

Why so much secrecy? Keeping the meeting private shows basic respect for the affected employee. No one wants to know that his or her coworkers are overhearing or seeing what may feel like a humiliating experience.

Also, if other employees witness or overhear what’s going on, they may develop a “siege mentality.” That is, without much more information than glum or tense faces or voices, they may worry that they’re one misstep away from being dismissed themselves or feel protective toward the affected employee (especially if they consider him or her a friend).

How to handle the meeting

To handle the dismissal as effectively as possible, don’t go it alone. Always make sure someone from human resources is present at the meeting. He or she can:

• Serve as an impassive voice if you or the employee becomes overly emotional during the meeting
• Answer the inevitable questions regarding pensions, insurance, and severance pay
• Suggest ways the employee can tell his or her spouse or partner about the dismissal
• Act as a buffer in case of an emotional or physical outburst from the employee
• Serve as a witness to the conversation in case a dispute emerges later about what you said

Also, get the meeting over with as quickly as possible. The more concisely you convey the news to the employee, the less prone you’ll be to say something that might expose your company to liability. Keep the meeting to five minutes—ten minutes at the most.

In addition, remember to be dispassionate, direct, and focused. Convey a sense of serious purpose and resoluteness. To avoid planting the seeds for legal problems later, resist the temptation to apologize or to reconsider your decision in light of protests from the employee. Don’t try to sugarcoat your message or give the impression that your decision can be negotiated. Instead, be as unemotional and resolute as possible.

What to say—and not say—during the meeting

The words and tone of voice you use in a dismissal meeting are crucial. Strive to apply the following practices:

• • Explain in general terms that the job has not worked out. If you choose to explain in more detail, do so in an objective, neutral tone that doesn’t make the employee feel personally attacked.

Examples might include the following: “We talked about your not meeting the performance goals for your role six months ago. You still haven’t met them.” “You’ve received coaching and counseling to work on your critical attitude toward colleagues, but your behavior hasn’t changed.”

By citing objective reasons in a neutral tone, you’ll lessen the chances that the person will sue or bad-mouth you or the company—something that can come back to haunt you during acute labor shortages.

• Strike a balance between being concise and direct, and being empathetic. That is, do acknowledge that losing a job is likely to have a profound impact on the person’s life; for example, “I know this is hard for you.” After delivering the news, give the person time to vent his or her anger, confusion, or bitterness for a few moments. Empathy and a chance to process emotions can help people bear difficult news.
• Deliver the news in a way that preserves the person′s dignity. This includes making arrangements for the employee to remove his or her personal effects from the office during off-hours or over the weekend (with monitoring from someone in the company). Employees who are made to feel humiliated before colleagues or disrespected and personally attacked during a dismissal will be more likely to feel angry and thus desire retribution.
• If severance is offered, consider offering as generous a package as possible. A generous severance package can help to salve any concerns about future security that the employee may feel. (You’ll need to consult with your boss to see what kinds of package budgets might allow.)

As for what not to say during a dismissal, remember that the specific language you use while dismissing an employee can play a major role in whether the person decides to sue. Therefore, language merits a focused discussion here. Use the following “don’ts” as guidelines during a dismissal:

• Don’t side with the worker or foster an “us against them” mind-set to ease your own discomfort. For example, don’t say, “Personally, I don’t think that letting you go is the right decision.”
• Don’t tell a dismissed employee that the dismissal is part of a layoff. This “white lie” could come back to haunt you in the form of a discrimination suit if you hire someone new to fill the vacated position—and the former employee finds out about it through his or her ex-coworkers.
• Don’t say anything like, “We’re after a more dynamic, aggressive workforce,” “You just don’t fit into the team,” “We need people with fewer family commitments who can see clients after normal work hours,” or “We need to project a high-energy image.” These kinds of statements could give the impression that the employee is being dismissed for discriminatory reasons, such as being too old, foreign, married, and so forth.
  • Don’t use humor or try to make light of the situation. You’ll only make the meeting even more painfully awkward. Worse, you may make the person feel laughed at or humiliated—and therefore more motivated to sue for wrongful dismissal.
  • Don’t threaten an employee who implies that he or she may challenge the dismissal; for example, by implying that you’ll withhold the person’s final paycheck unless he or she agrees not to sue. These forms of persuasion are considered illegal coercion and would come back to haunt you in court.

Learning from the dismissal meeting

No matter how difficult a dismissal meeting may be, it may yield information that can help you make important improvements in your group. But to gain that information, you’ll need to provide opportunities for the dismissed employee to communicate his or her opinions, and then listen to them objectively.

For example, if the employee has numerous thoughts about what went wrong, encourage him or her to write them down in a letter or memo and to share them during an exit interview. With nothing at stake any longer, the former employee may offer candid opinions of oppressive policies or other problems that you can use later to identify and implement needed changes. At the very least, by making the individual feel that his or her views are important enough to take seriously, you’ll help ease the pain of the situation and shore up the person’s self-esteem.

Also, be sure to listen as well as talk during the dismissal meeting. A person who is being dismissed may speak more openly about workplace problems than other employees will. By reviewing parting comments (even if they’re barbs) objectively, you may be able to identify weaknesses in your group that you can correct. Still, during the dismissal meeting, do not make any promises to change the way you manage your group.