Learn from the Queens of Fierce

So just how does a middle-aged ex-IBMer, ex-computer programmer, former corporate executive, author, and straight woman go from that to performing in drag as the glamorously fierce Lady Trinity? Here’s how it all started.

Raised in a blue-collar family, I (Jackie) did everything I could to be the best daughter possible: I got straight As in school, behaved perfectly, earned a degree in computer science, and became a hardworking marketer at IBM. I was always the good girl, doing the right thing, never making waves. I did fine but never felt good enough. After a failed marriage and another failed long relationship, I started to question who I was. I wrote two marketing books with my former significant other and became a successful management consultant and speaker. When that relationship/professional partnership ended I found myself on my own, in my forties, at the lowest point in my life. I was bored with the work I had been doing, felt stifled creatively, and knew I wasn’t living up to my potential. I felt insecure and knew something drastic needed to happen. At forty-seven, though, I wasn’t sure that I had the confidence to reinvent myself and do something completely different. I was stuck.

During this time, not coincidentally, I found myself freakishly drawn to and inspired by pop superstar Lady Gaga. She even became the subject of my third, and first solo, business book, Monster Loyalty: How Lady Gaga Turns Followers into Fanatics. Here was a woman who had created a powerful, disruptive persona—complete with crazy makeup, big wigs, wild costumes, and tall heels—and had successfully conquered the misogynist, male-dominated recording industry.

I began to think, doesn’t everyone, every day, create personas as we act out the various roles we play in society? You have a professional persona you create for work, a more nurturing persona with your kids, a free-spirited persona when you are out with your friends, and I could go on and on. All of these personas together make up our personality. But in adult life we often alter our personas too much in order to fit into society. We worry about what others will think of us. Sometimes it’s just easier to conform rather than stand out. This is especially true for women. Psychology tells us that self-doubt derails us from pursuing our passions and accomplishing our greatest goals. Fear and doubt keep us clinging to conformity and stop us from being our best selves.

And, sure enough, there I was one night in my everyday uniform—a wrap dress with comfortable (and, I’d later learn, dowdy) slingbacks, alone, feeling defeated on the couch, surfing through channels when I stumbled on RuPaul’s Drag Race. I simply could not keep my eyes off of those drag queens I was seeing on the screen. Here were men going balls out (or, more precisely, in) to create these fierce, fabulous, female characters for the stage. I watched them, envious, as they unabashedly transformed themselves into whatever their hearts desired, unafraid to flout the socially acceptable boundaries of beauty by experimenting with costumes, cosmetics, and wigs that defied expectations and even gravity. Here were men revering womanhood and pulling together the most feminine, most fabulous, and most glamorous traits that I (supposedly) just naturally possessed. No limits, no apologies, just strong, bold, dynamic femininity accessorized with a stiletto-sharp wit and a give-no-fucks attitude. As I watched season after season of the show, I began to realize that drag queens are terrific role models for how to build confidence: they create bold personas, own the way they look, command attention using powerful body positions, aren’t afraid to take risks, and can shake off criticism with a flip of their wig. When I found myself in challenging personal and business situations, I started thinking, “What Would a Drag Queen Do?” I wondered how I could live every day with that sense of empowerment.

Something that RuPaul said really changed my thinking about how I could attain the same confidence as the queens I watched on the show. She said, “You’re born naked and the rest is drag.”¹

Most of us think of drag as being a performance art for the stage. But RuPaul’s insight is that we create and perform personas in our everyday life. Whether you know it or not, you are doing drag right now. You do drag every day. Your drag is not just what you wear, but also how you act, what you say, how you say it, and how you carry yourself. And we can transform ourselves into any persona we want, just as we did when we were kids on Halloween. What I wanted was the power and confidence of the drag performers I saw on TV. Hell, if men could make this amazing transformation into fierce glamazons through drag, why couldn’t I? So while still doing my day job, I decided that I, Jackie Huba, would become—wait for it—a drag queen!

As I mentioned earlier, women can do drag. When most people think of drag performers, they think of men performing as female characters who are, of course, called drag queens. Actually, there are other lesser-known categories of drag: women who perform in drag as male characters are called drag kings, and women who do drag as female characters are known as bio-queens, faux queens, or simply female drag queens. That’s what I wanted to do.

I began to immerse myself in the world of drag. I watched hundreds of live drag performances, went on two drag cruises, interviewed the world’s top drag queens about how they create their powerful female personas, and got their advice on how to do the same for myself. Many of the queens I interviewed have been on RuPaul’s Drag Race, because in the drag world these performers represent the best of the best. I interviewed Courtney Act, Derrick Barry, April Carrión, Adore Delano, Laganja Estranja, Miss Fame, Cynthia Lee Fontaine, Jujubee, Trixie Mattel, Chad Michaels, Coco Montrese, Phi Phi O’Hara, Raven, Latrice Royale, Yara Sofia, Shangela Laquifa Wadley, and Katya Zamolodchikova.

I mentored with a local drag mother; developed my own drag persona named Lady Trinity; learned how to do theatrical makeup, wig, and costume styling; mastered the art of lip-syncing; and learned to playfully seduce my audiences (large and small). I’ve performed in some of the top drag events in the world. And I’ve met multitudes of others who’ve also been transformed by their love of drag queens, some of whom are profiled in this book. I want you to be transformed the way they were.