Writing a book is a journey unlike any other I have ever taken, and, as with most journeys, it would not have been possible without the love, support, encouragement, feedback, and tireless efforts of the many people who made the journey with me. I know I will have the chance to sit down with each of them and express my profound gratitude for what their contribution has meant to me. In the meantime, I'd like to thank them here.
Joni Evans, originally my agent at William Morris and now a dear friend. You gave me the belief and confidence that I had a book in me, and that it would prove useful to others. Your ongoing mentorship and guidance, substantive help, enthusiasm, and inspiration have provided a rare form of encouragement. You have been there every step of the way. I'm deeply grateful. The world needs more like you.
Jennifer Rudolph Walsh and Jay Mandel. Along with the team at William Morris, you stepped into the project and embraced it with the same passion and commitment, and saw me through to the finish line. I feel fortunate to have you both in my corner.
Pamela van Giessen, my editor at John Wiley & Sons. You believed in me, and more important, had a vision for this book far more significant than the one I brought you. You saw that HOW is for people, not just the institutions for which they work. You felt the resonance of this material, shaped and formed it as we went along, and then kept me from running off the track. Perhaps most important, you promised to blue-pencil the word ethics if I ever put it on the page, forcing me to think about these issues in deeper and more universal ways. You were, in a word, visionary. Thanks also to the whole team at John Wiley & Sons, especially Jennifer MacDonald, Nancy Roths-child, Alison Bamberger, and the extraordinary Mary Daniello, for their care and efforts in seeing this book onto the shelves.
Nelson Handel made unique editorial contributions throughout. You helped me better tell the story and lay out the ideas. Our collaboration—intellectual and literary—was intense, and the book is much better for it. No one argues with me like you do. Thank you.
No book that attempts to cover this much ground would be possible without a resourceful and enthusiastic team of researchers. Your passion for the message and relentless digging brought to light many gems that helped the story shine. Liza Foreman, Lisa Derrick, Maureen Brackey, Brian Hong, and especially Diane Wright for her meticulous efforts, I am grateful to each of you for your contributions. I'd also like to thank Catherine Fredman and Mark Ebner for your additional editorial contributions; Adam Turteltaub for your thoughtful research and support; Caroline Heald, thank you for your caring assistance; and Dave Lambertsen for your illustrations.
I am fortunate to have benefited from the uncommon intellect and erudition of Eric Pinckert. At the beginning, when the book was taking shape, and at the end, when it needed to stay in shape, you were invaluable. Mark Detelich, thank you for your unique enhancements. Rob Shavell, thank you for our various collaborations, especially the last one, which resulted in the subtitle of this book.
Ideas never come in a vacuum, and I have been honored over the years for the inspiration and challenges of many brilliant thinkers. Steve Kerr, you are foremost among them. We have been on an intellectual journey together for years, and you have had a profound influence on me. If anything times zero is zero, than anything times you is nearly infinite. You are one of those rare people with whom nascent ideas begin and bloom. When this book came about, you became an active participant, helping me refine and extend the work, make each idea more precise, and make each principle more grounded. I'm proud to call you friend.
My thanks also go to Marcus Buckingham for your wise perspective as I began this effort and helpful feedback near the finish line. Having been there many times before, you helped me stay focused on the book's promise and you stepped in at key moments to help me deliver it.
My friend Tom Friedman, you sat me down in Aspen one day and said the things that a new writer needs to hear in a way no one else could have, and our ongoing conversations since then have been invaluable. What a special privilege for me. Through our "Aristotelian days" on the gondolas and the slopes, Aspen will never seem the same.
Murray Hidary, thank you for our close friendship especially during the journey of discovering this book in myself. Our many conversations on life's issues through the lens of HOW have been illuminating.
Ben Sherwood, my dear friend of 20 years, your inspirational example showed me that you can write a book and still keep your day job. Then you introduced me to Joni. For what more can a friend ask? Thanks for your rare sensibilities, wise advice, and for pushing me past the points of no return.
Among the many things I learned from a great teacher of mine, Rabbi David Ellenson, is the expression from the Mishnah, "make for yourself a rabbi, and acquire for yourself a friend." David, I am honored to be able to call you my rabbi and blessed to be able to call you a dear friend. I cherish our many meaningful conversations on matters of HOW.
I am grateful to all the people with whom I spoke about the ideas in this book, from business executives and thought leaders to line and middle managers to professional cheerleaders, some of whom read and commented on various drafts, some of whom were interviewed, and all of whose insight and experiences have helped shape my thinking, including Keven Bellows, William Broyles Jr., Judge Ruben Castillo, Jack Daly, Keith Darcy, Paula Desio, David Ellen, Patti Ellis, Massimo Ferragamo, Roger Fine, Mike Fricklas, Pat Gnazzo, David Greenberg, Joie Gregor, Charles Hampden-Turner, Patricia Harned, George Henderson, Dr. Michael Hoffman, Dr. Richard Joyce, Jeff Kindler, Rich Korn, Mats Lederhausen, Doug Lankler, Tom McCormick, Michael Monts, Paul Robert, Adam Rosman, Timothy Schultz, Jim Skinner, Joe Stallard, Robert Steele, Patricia Swann, Dr. Kerry Sulkowicz, David Toms, Chris Weiss, Marianne Williamson, Linda Wolf, Steve Wynn, and Paul Zak. It is impossible to remember and properly thank all the other people who, through casual conversation, spirited debate, or a glass of good wine also contributed to my thinking. If I have neglected to mention you now, I thank you for all you have given.
I'd like to thank Philosophy, without which I would never have read a book from cover to cover or learned that ideas can change the world. Thanks to all my professors and mentors, patient and loving people, who helped me see through the words to the profound ideas that lay beneath them. And thanks especially to my dear friend, professor Herb Morris from UCLA, who went the extra mile to mentor and help me through life, and still does.
The ideas in this book grew most directly from my experience with my colleagues at LRN (where all of our conference rooms are named after philosophers). At some level, every member of the LRN team over the past 13 years has contributed to how I think about and approach human achievement in both business and life. This book would not have been possible without the day-to-day, head-to-head interactions that have characterized our journey together. I want to thank you all for giving me the opportunity to work with you and to grow and learn by so doing, for your transparency, your trust, and for allowing me to join with you to transform these ideas from notions into real-world hows. So much of what I am today results from our mutual journey. I'd also like to thank the distinguished current and former members of the LRN board of directors, Senator Bill Bradley, Rex Golding, Alan Silverman, Alan Spoon, Sheli Rosenberg, Joe Mandel, and Lee Feldman for believing in the book and its relevance to our mission.
My deepest appreciation also extends to all of LRN's customers. Through my interactions with you over the years and the collaborations with your finest minds, you have given me the opportunity to solve real problems of ethics, compliance, leadership, and culture—real hows for a real world. You will see the fruits of our collaboration hanging amply throughout this book.
Family shapes you as nothing else. My mother, Sydelle Seidman, underpinned my life with values. You gave me a home base, and through our many adventures, the courage to venture widely yet never leave home behind. You helped me see the power of instinct and intuition, and believed in me when others did not. I love you.
My brother Ari and sister Goldee, thanks for your solidarity and love as we adapted together to all that life threw at us. I love you both. Being sandwiched between you, I got my first and most lasting lessons of how. Alex and Gabi, my niece and nephew, your resiliency and spirit show that our family's next generation will also know how. I love being your uncle.
My father, Alex Seidman, who lives in memory, gave me the love of knowledge and connected me to the lessons of history, both others' and our own. What he sacrificed for us inspires me still.
Yury and Vicki Parad, my wife's parents, who, had I a choice of in-laws, would be my favorites among all possible in-laws. I am blessed by your sense of what it means to be family. Thanks for all your caring support, Russian remedies, and Yury, for your careful reading and mind-map of the book. And thanks to my lovely sister-in-law, Michele, for being a shining example of nice people finishing first.
Finally for these acknowledgments but first in my book of life, Maria Seidman, my wife, my constant content. Throughout the journey, from cover to cover, you have been the other voice in my head, reading, reflecting, pushing, and helping me to get it right. You have also been a loving and constant source of energy and support. Above all, you are my constant inspiration that the ideas in this book extend beyond business to life itself. I know no truer partner. I love you.
As I sit here today looking back, one final nod to all those seeming curses that turned out to be blessings in disguise.
And to all those people who questioned how I was going make a living with philosophy: This is how.
D. S.