Secret 5

PASSION

Never Stop Courting

Purpose is the reason you journey. Passion is the fire that lights your way.

—ANONYMOUS

Ten years ago, when my wife and I celebrated our fortieth wedding anniversary, someone at the celebration gathering asked my wife, “How have you and Chip stayed happily married all these many years?” I was expecting a funny comment about it being easy since I was on the road all the time. But she got serious. “We never stopped courting,” she said without hesitation. A hush fell over the crowd, who heard it as profound wisdom and not the party-antic quip they were expecting.

The obvious secret for any partnership is to never take the relationship for granted. In a marriage, that might mean remembering red-letter days, bringing home flowers with a milestone in mind, paying a flattering compliment, or performing a ritual that is painted in the color adoration. The point is that noticeable passion attracts. Your passion can serve as a magnetic force to invite your customer’s imagination out and onto the focus of your union.

Passion is the intersection where the best in a provider meets the best in a customer. A deliberate and cherished gift, it does more than yield loyalty on both sides; it harvests deep respect, admiration, and true devotion. Alliances with passion unleash innovation. “Passion,” wrote world renowned cellist Yo-Yo Ma, “is one great force that unleashes creativity because if you are passionate about something, then you’re more willing to take risks.” “Courting” implies a “never take it for granted” energy that electrifies newness and supports a decorum of adoration. It affirms the connection and invigorates its inventiveness.

Most relationships with customers do not end with a storm of sound and fury. Most do not end in a fit of dissonance or from caustic conflict. Most “vanilla” to death. It is death by indifference, monotony, and negligence. Passion is the engine of enthusiasm that is never switched off. “Innovation equals change, and working through change requires massive investment of energy,” wrote Doug Hall, founder of Eureka! Ranch. “The only way you can sustain the energy required to commercialize a meaningfully unique idea is if you really love it.”

Passion in a co-creation partnership has three parts (figure 8). First is zeal. Zeal is not an extravert word; however, it is an expression associated with a charisma that influences. It is defined as “the fervor or tireless devotion to a person or cause and a determination in its furtherance.” It is a fire-starting device that lights up ideation and kindles breakthroughs. The second part of passion is “circus”—the setting for fueling innovation with your customer. The final part in Secret 5 focuses on honor as a gerund, not a noun. Honoring is bringing a sense of nobility to the celebration of innovation—its performers, its performance, and its process.

“Passion” was a reason given for the Inn at Sea Island (Georgia) being ranked the number 1 hotel in the United States in U.S. News & World Report in 2016, after winning the same ranking in 2014. “It is an unmistakable infectious energy,” said Sea Island Company president Scott Steilen. “For our associates, it means confidently and competently shifting the disposition of each of our guests to one of pure delight.” And the Inn at Sea Island type of passion is the antidote to spirit leeches.

One of the hazards of fishing swampy rivers is the risk of getting a leech. Unlike with many parasites, you cannot feel a leech attaching to your arm or leg. A ritual among river anglers is to always check for the bloodsuckers after emerging from the water. And the typical way to remove the slimy hitchhiker is with a lighted match or lighter.

Leeches suck the blood from their target; spirit leeches suck the energy and passion from theirs. Some spirit leeches are dark, removing optimism, hope, and confidence. Mention an opportunity and they can tell you why it’s a mistake. Suggest a new approach to resolving a problem and they will tell you all the reasons it won’t work. Some play the blame game or bring out the excuse use. Some are almost invisible, specializing in putting wet blankets on joy.

Spirit leeches are removed the same way real leeches are—with fire. Not a lighted match, of course, but with the warmth and energy of a passionate spirit. You do not inherit, acquire, or borrow a spirit of passion. You choose it much like you choose to introduce yourself to a stranger. Those who opt to be upbeat refuse to let spirit leeches attach to them. They know that breaking the “way we’ve always done it” norm can lead to enrichment, growth, and progress. And even introverts can muster up enough obvious passion to produce a customer grin!

Partnerships with power-full passion are personifications of honor. Symbolically, they bow or curtsy to each other. They are quick to affirm, equally quick to defend to an outsider. They bring a gifting mentality, always giving more than they expect to get. And they celebrate the raw side of innovation—the wild, audacious, partially baked, not-ready-for-prime-time creations.

When I facilitated an innovative-service creation session with a group of hospital leaders (who each had brought a key customer), the end-of-the-day comment most commonly heard was, “I have never felt more complete and more affirmed.” It reminded me of the closing scene from the hit movie Jerry Maguire. Co-creation partnerships at their best are affirmations like that one: “You complete me.”¹