You have to be incredibly brave, methodical and disciplined to strive for and achieve balance. Philippe Petit, French high‐wire artist extraordinaire, said, ‘My journey has always been the balance between chaos and order’.
Most of us can only sit back, admire and wonder.
We talk, we preach, we debate, we oscillate.
We do, we don't, we master, we stumble.
Live to work or work to live?
A deceptively simple question.
Where to start?
Maybe we commence with detailing the many reasons why people believe leadership means sacrifice. The greater the success, the greater the impact. The higher the position, the higher the burden. You get the picture. When we rise up the corporate ladder, we're under more pressure and invariably, home life can get smashed.
Yes, I could start there but I will not. That is too easy, too obvious and collectively, we have seen more than enough examples to add validity. I want to talk about and showcase the opposite: those leaders who make balance work, and how they make it work.
I have been inspired and led by many of these very leaders who make balance work. Leaders of different cultures, genders and personal circumstances, who have had unbelievable breadth and scope of responsibility, accountability levels that most people would shudder at, workloads that defy belief and an intensity of pressure that is constant and unequivocally relentless.
Yet, they achieve and, importantly, portray balance. They passionately believe that to create excellence at work, they must ultimately create excellence in life. They realise that if they get this balance wrong, they will never deliver on their full potential, and exceptional leaders despise unfulfilled potential.
So, how do these inspirational leaders do it?
With discipline. They provide the same diligence, focus and dedication to life–work balance as they do to the bottom line, if not more. Effective leaders:
ensure uninterrupted quality family time. It is not up for debate. This time is scheduled, set aside and viewed as sacred. This includes taking regular and set holidays.
socialise. With work colleagues or those outside the business; either way, it is regular, it is downtime and it is enjoyable.
exercise. This does not necessarily mean flogging yourself to exhaustion, yet they believe in physical strength being a conduit to cognitive performance.
watch what they eat. Some are extreme, most are balanced. On occasions, some even eat kale.
have perspective. They are curious outside of what they know. They appreciate that interests and variety outside of work have subconscious benefits. They always do.
have connection. Be that with community, country or the world at large.
value recovery. They appreciate they are corporate athletes and that recovery is the cornerstone of enduring success. How they recover depends on the individual: for some it's meditation, for others it's music or reading. For many, it's wine.
have purpose and are purposeful. Productivity and performance are one thing; doing good for a greater cause is another.
This is of course an incomplete list. There is a multitude of impressive and inspirational techniques and options available. Additionally, virtually every effective leader I have encountered has also had an exceptional support base around them. Be that at home or at work, they often need this to ensure they are at their peak. Without this support, it is challenging at best.
Personally, through trial and error, I now believe I am closer to achieving effective balance. When I commit to actions such as those listed, I am a better leader of myself and of others. My energy levels are high, I seldom have dreaded ‘off days’ and my enthusiasm and drive are palpable throughout an organisation. As a result, outside of work, I am a better partner, father and friend. Do I get it wrong at times? Hell, yes. But through awareness, education and experience, I am so much better than I used to be.
Everyone will have their own list and their own levels of importance in what constitutes effective balance. It will always depend on personal circumstance. For some, this will mean family first. For others it may be financial security or health. Understandably, most lists will also change over time.
TIME ON THE BALL
At the risk of oversimplification, have you ever noticed that some people are able to handle pressure so much better than others? On many occasions, they face exactly the same pressures as their peers, yet their response is noticeably different. No stress, and little anxiety or inertia in making key decisions. In sports, they term this as having ‘time on the ball’. Despite everything coming at them, exceptional athletes never appear to be rushed; they absorb pressure with apparent ease. Dan Marino, Liz Ellis, Lionel Messi, Sam Kerr, Lewis Hamilton, Dan Carter. The list is long and impressive.
It's exactly the same in corporate life. Outstanding leaders have a knack of taking in pressure and remaining calm. Where needed, they shield pressure from others and remain super balanced. It's little wonder that these are the types of leaders that people aspire to be.
Interestingly, in high‐pressure situations, the most composed person in the room is routinely the leader. This happens for a reason: time in role and experience are invaluable, and very few who translate pressure into stress reach the upper echelons of the corporate ladder.
You may have noticed that I consistently use the term ‘life–work’ balance, not the other way around.
I was drawn to this terminology via the former global CEO of Unilever, Paul Polman. He has spoken strongly of life–work balance and it resonated with me immediately.
Personally, I work to live; work is a means and not an end. Don't get me wrong — work is a very important part of who I am. It drives me, energises me and, critically, it inspires me. But it is only one part of me, and unless the rest falls into place, I will never be at my best for myself or as a leader of others.
THE IMPORTANCE OF MESSAGING
This brings me to my second desire for the chapter: a reminder of leadership responsibility.
Leaders of all levels have a responsibility to showcase an effective life–work balance. Unless they do so, those beneath them won't aspire to leadership. If you don't believe me, consider the following story.
One lasting memory comes from a town hall meeting I attended in Guangzhou, China many years ago. (A town hall meeting is what Americans call a briefing of sorts to employees or constituents, with opportunities for feedback and questions.)
Approximately 700 employees were in attendance. The session was being led by a company veteran of almost 40 years, an exceptional leader who at the time was the global lead of a multibillion‐dollar segment. Much admired and uniformly respected, he was what I would call a ‘super classy’ leader. You knew exactly where he stood on all matters; he was a genuinely good bloke, and one of the most supportive, pragmatic and disciplined thinkers I have encountered.
On this one occasion, though, I did not agree with his messaging.
Following a general business update, questions were being taken from the floor. The first came from a mid‐level sales manager from the southern province of Guangdong. He asked, ‘Please can you tell me how you maintain a good level of work–life balance?’
It's a fairly standard question, and I was curious as to the response. The entire Chinese team had a reputation for being incredibly hardworking. They did long hours, with an accepted norm that you stayed in the office until your boss left. Many of the senior executives at the time had families based in other major cities or Asian countries, so during the working week they would regularly stay late in the office and get in early in the morning. No complaints were made; it was simply the way it was.
The response at the time was casual, humourous and honest: ‘My wife will tell you there is no such thing as work–life balance, and, if there ever was such a thing, I certainly don't have it’.
He then proceeded to talk about the many promotions and assignments that had come his way. It was an impressive and inspirational list. Nobody had ever forced him to take these positions; he knew what he was getting into and believed the increased workload was simply part and parcel of more senior roles.
I understand this. It's a common practice within most large multinationals and is inherently true for most businesses, regardless of size and scale. That said, this response concerned me. I felt it delivered the wrong message to all the aspiring leaders in the room that day — including myself.
In the moment, I turned to my Corporate Affairs Director. Without needing to say anything, we just looked at each other and raised our eyebrows. It was clear she was thinking exactly the same as I was: ‘Why the heck would you want to get to the top of the corporate ladder if that's the kind of sacrifice you have to make?’
At the time of that town hall, I was doing okay career‐wise. I was heading up the Wrigley Pacific operation and we were approaching our fifth year of consecutive profitable growth — not bad for a so‐called ‘mature’ region. I was a senior member of a dynamic Asia Pacific Leadership team that knew no boundaries. I had direct control over a couple of factories, multiple industry‐leading gum, mint and confectionery brands, and was surrounded by an exceptionally passionate and talented team. But I'll tell you this, for those few minutes of that town hall meeting, there was not a chance I wanted to go further up the career ladder. If that was what it was going to take to get to the very top, count me out.
Over the years I have hypothetically discussed the China example with senior leaders and business coaches to mixed results.
The majority believe that authenticity is always the best approach, and that this leader was simply being honest and transparent. As I hope this book is demonstrating, authenticity is a key value of mine; yet in examples like this one, I feel a slightly revised tack is required.
I believe that the role of all leaders is to unlock potential in others. This includes encouraging career progression. Unless your leadership positively displays balance, many under your tutelage will never yearn for increased levels of seniority. If this means shielding some of your actual behaviours from others, so be it. I know this sounds disingenuous, yet I believe it's necessary.
A QUESTION OF CHOICE
Prior to diving into the practical part, for those ‘balance’ sceptics out there, let me reiterate one thing.
I am not against those who prioritise work first. It's an individual choice. Recently, I worked out that I have travelled on average two days a working week since the age of 23. My latter years in Australia have been a lot more forgiving, which played a key role in my decision to return to this side of the world. My earlier years in Europe were particularly demanding: almost three‐quarters of my time was spent on travel, with regular two‐ to three‐week international trips. Without a home support base, this would have been impossible. I once did the numbers: I have missed out on 1536 days of the life of my youngest child, Evie. At age 16, that is 26 per cent of her life. Devastating.
Compared to those who serve in the forces, do uncompromising shift work or have work assignments many miles from home, I know my numbers pale in significance. Nevertheless, it still hurts. Even though I am super close to my kids, the guilt pangs still remain.
