Giving Eff ective Feedback165
Step 3: Build a shared understanding of the issues.
At this stage, build a shared narrative with your employees about what is
and isn’t working in their current situation. “Your employee very likely still
knows more about it than you do,” says Jen Su, and certainly they know
more about their point of view. Bring all of that information out into the
open by asking questions, such as:
• Long-term development
“What’s your comfort level in this area? How do you want to feel
about it?”
“How have you performed in the past? What should success look
like?”
“How do you prepare for this now? How could you prepare
differently?”
• Debrief on an event or project
“How did things go? In an ideal world, what would have
happened?”
“How would you describe your impact? What worked well?
What didn’t?”
“How would you prepare or handle this differently for this
next time?”
• Short-term problem solving
“Tell me more about the situation, your tasks and deadlines.”
“Which of these are tied to our group’s highest priorities?
“What courses of action are available to you? How feasible
are they?”
166Managing Individuals
Use active listening techniques and ask open-ended questions. Keep a lid
on your reactions, if you can; your employee will feel safer sharing their
vulnerabilities if you maintain a neutral, sympathetic demeanor, and let
them talk without interruption.
Step 4: Reframe the issue.
Once your employee has laid out their point of view, it’s time to start work-
ing on solutions and next steps together. Instead of offering advice (“Try X.
Here’s how I do it . . . ”), help them think more critically about the assump-
tions and choices that are already driving their behavior. You can do this
by helping them see themes in what they’ve said, and by offering competing
lenses through which they can see the issue at hand. Consider language
like:
“You seem worried about . . .” or “It sounds like your main concern
is . . .”
“I notice you’ve used this same phrase a couple times in this conver-
sation. Why is that important to you?”
“I see a pattern in how you deal with ___ issue. What’s going on there?”
“It sounds to me like your current outlook emphasizes X, but doesn’t
allow much room for Y. How could that be holding you back?”
“Have you seen someone else be successful with this issue in the past?
How did they approach it?”
“What if you looked at it from this angle/tried this tactic? How would
that play out?”
Step 5: Close with an action plan.
End with a clear action plan for your employees, something that will help
them make meaningful progress and hold them accountable going for-
ward. Ask them to articulate their main takeaways orally, or write up their
to-do list in an email after the session. Your role in this stage is to ensure
Giving Eff ective Feedback167
that the goals are realistic, help them prioritize tasks, highlight obstacles
and brainstorm solutions, and provide additional support as needed.
Step 6: Follow up.
After the session ends, check up on your direct reports to make sure that
they continue to improve. Schedule more coaching sessions, if they’re
needed. And touch base casually to learn what’s working and what isn’t,
modify the action plan, secure additional resources, and give feedback—
whether to praise or to improve. Even if you are pressed for time, still put
these check-ins on your calendar. A one-line email or quick word of en-
couragement can go a long way toward sustaining your employees’ motiva-
tion as they grow.
Performance reviews
While coaching requires more planning than a casual, one-off feedback
conversation, performance reviews generally occur annually. As with
coaching sessions, you’ll use them to discuss goals, provide feedback, and
correct performance problems. Unlike coaching, these appraisals directly
affect salary decisions and promotions. That can make them time consum-
ing and stressful for manager and employee alike.
If approached with the right frame of mind, they’re well worth the ef-
fort. You don’t often have the chance to sit down with your people, face to
face, and say: “Here’s where you stand.” “This is what I need from you.”
“Thank you for your outstanding work.” During these meetings, you can
address all the critical issues that get lost in the daily grind.
Your formal feedback will give your direct report the opportunity
for growth. Moreover, a yearly review offers them some protection when
they’re struggling with performance issues. If you address their problems
head on in regular, formal meetings, they won’t be blindsided by bad news
when it’s too late to do anything about it.
Performance reviews are also valuable to your organization. The infor-
mation you collect and codify will help the company make valid decisions
168Managing Individuals
about pay and developing talent. And when it comes to diffi cult employees,
performance reviews protect your organization again lawsuits by employ-
ees who have been fi red, demoted, or denied a merit increase.
There’s no one right way to conduct a performance review: every orga-
nization has its procedures, and each situation presents a different set of
challenges. Here is a set of general steps:
Step 1: Prepare your employee
It’s important to involve your employees in every stage of the process, so
that their point of view is incorporated. Start by asking them to complete
a self-appraisal. In many companies, HR provides a checklist for this pur-
pose, with the goals, behaviors, and functions associated with each em-
ployee’s role. If you’re making your own list, include questions like:
• How well do you feel you’ve achieved your professional goals?
• What accomplishments are you proudest of? What contributed to
your success?
• Which goals are you currently struggling with? What’s holding
back your progress?
Whether you’re using a template from HR or making your own, make
sure that the performance goals you reference are items that you’ve already
shared with the employee at their last review or when they were hired. You
can use this list to prepare your own appraisal, too. Look through the notes
you’ve collected about each person’s performance—projects they’ve worked
on, feedback you’ve given them, any complaints or commendations from
their colleagues. If possible, solicit feedback from others in the company
who have worked with your direct report.
Dick Grote, who has created performance management systems for
hundreds of the world’s biggest organizations, recommends giving your
employees a copy of your appraisal an hour or so before your review meet-
ing starts. “When people read someone’s assessment of them, they are
going to have all sorts of churning emotions,” he notes. “Let them have that
on their own time, and give them a chance to think about it.”
Giving Eff ective Feedback169
Step 2: Open with a tone of partnership
Your employee may have an emotional response to reading your review, so
as your meeting begins, do what you can to put them at ease as you settle
in; don’t let them feel as if they’re in the prisoner’s dock, about to receive
judgment. Next, invite your employee to share their self-appraisal: “I’d like
to start by asking you to talk a little about how you feel you’re doing.” Lis-
ten carefully and don’t interrupt. This phase of a performance review, like
a coaching session, will help you understand your direct report’s point of
view and tailor your remarks later in the conversation.
Step 3: Share your appraisal
Traditionally, performance reviews are treated as a place to focus on what’s
not working with a direct report. But exclusively or dominantly focusing
on the negative can be hugely discouraging. Be clear in highlighting the
strengths you appreciate about employees. If they highlighted the same
area of strength in their self-assessment, reinforce their perception. If they
didn’t, share why you value a particular talent or skill.
Carefully choose the areas of development that are most important to
discuss in the performance review. Use a conversational tone to review the
expectation, the gap, and the opportunity to demonstrate improvement.
As with all corrective feedback, don’t be vague (“You’re not a team player”)
or make it about your feelings (“I’m so disappointed”). Instead, talk about
specifi c behaviors: “When you do X, it is causing a problem for the team”
or “You’re not meeting Y performance target.” Being clear and succinct
in these moments is actually the most respectful thing you can do: you’re
treating your employee like a mature adult and giving them the informa-
tion they need to do better.
Step 4: Probe for the root cause of performance gaps
Once you’ve given positive or corrective feedback, encourage your employee
to refl ect their perceptions. Pay close attention to how they respond by:
• Listening actively. Concentrate on your employees’ message
and its implications rather than on your response. In particular,
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