Truth 42
Environment Matters

Early in my career I learned many of my lessons the hard way; I had to make my own mistakes as opposed to learning from others. Given that, I had the opportunity to be on the receiving end of many feedback sessions. Some of them went well, but others didn't. One manager was particularly good about delivering feedback. He was very factual, unemotional, and empathetic. The thing I remember most, though, was how he ensured the setting was comfortable. Whenever we would have feedback discussions, we would sit at a table in his office. The door was closed, the phone was turned off, and there were no other distractions. I felt, even though I was getting some hard feedback on things I needed to improve, that he was making every effort to deliver the message in as comfortable a setting as possible. I was very impressed with this aspect of how he delivered feedback, and the messages delivered have stuck with me for years.

In all my feedback sessions, I never encountered anyone who overtly made the session uncomfortable. I never endured a bright spotlight with "Where were you on the night of the 14th?" questions thrown at me. I have, though, been through feedback sessions where the environment wasn't uncomfortable, but there wasn't an effort to make things comfortable either. I'm in no way advocating that extraordinary measures need be taken to conduct a feedback session, but anything you can do to reduce some of the angst will better ensure that the messaging is clear and that the feedback is better accepted. After all, it's about getting the feedback message across, not how much you make the recipient sweat in the process.

I was impressed by how he delivered feedback, and the messages delivered have stuck with me for years.

Next time you are delivering feedback, consider the following to better ensure a more conducive environment:

• Minimize distractions. Turn off the ringer on your phone (this goes for cell phones too). Make sure your computer screen is out of sight so that an e-mail or instant message won't distract you. Go to a quiet place where you and the other person can sit and talk without any extraneous noise or distraction. Giving feedback is tough enough without having to compete with any attention diversions.
• Don't sit behind your desk. Sitting behind your desk creates a perception of power on your part and can cause your feedback session to become one of power rather than constructive advice. Putting yourself in a position of power puts the recipient on guard and reduces the likelihood that your feedback will be accepted. Sit at a table, go to the person's office, or go somewhere else. Just make sure you don't go somewhere where distractions are likely to affect your discussion.
• Talk face to face if at all possible. You're likely to get better results if you can discuss face to face and not only hear verbal reactions but see nonverbal reactions, such as crossed arms (which signify an unwillingness to cooperate) or facial expressions. I've tried to give feedback through e-mail or over the phone and have not been nearly as successful as giving it face to face. If you can talk face to face, do it.

Giving feedback is tough enough; you don't need environmental issues detracting from your message and making a difficult situation even more difficult. Avoid distractions, make the environment as comfortable for the recipient as you can, and give the feedback face to face. You'll get your point across better, and your recipient will appreciate your effort.