8
Fulfill Both People and Project

What does it mean to be fulfilled? Is delivering a project to specification, on time, and within budget an adequate definition? It’s not if our customer is unhappy. And what does it mean for each of us to be fulfilled in the midst of our overscheduled, warp speed, multitasking? Increasing our levels of power and speed may be the right criterion when shopping for a new computer, but is it really the standard by which we want to measure our lives? When was the last time we stopped and asked ourselves, “Where are we rushing to?”

When people must flee their homes in the face of an impending disaster, what do they take? What would we take? Maybe we’d grab the family photo album or some precious keepsake that could not be replaced. In the final analysis, what we really value is the love. How many times have we reminded one another that no one lying on his deathbed has ever said, “Gee, I wish I had spent more time at the office”? Why? There’s not enough love.

Yet, all the things that we have identified as essential for project success—effective communication, making and keeping commitments, harmonizing layers of the system, reciprocal relationships—lead us in this direction. They point toward greater caring, trust, respect, and openness—in other words, toward love.94

As you might imagine, talking about love in the context of project management was a bit much for Al. I tried to reassure him by explaining that this all had a very practical application. The quickest way to see how effectively a team was exercising all that we had talked about was to attend one of their meetings. Meetings provide a good indication as to how they work together and also tend to accurately reflect the larger company culture. Consequently, if you can change your meetings, you can begin to change your culture.

I began by asking them what they thought about their meetings.

Meeting Barriers

“That’s an easy enough question to answer,” said Al. “For the most part our meetings are unfocused time wasters.”

Brenda responded immediately. There was a hint of defensiveness in her voice. “With the number of strong personalities we have to contend with,” she said, shooting a pointed glance in Al’s direction, “keeping meetings focused can sometimes be a challenge. We do the best we can given the circumstances. Sure meetings can be frustrating, but they are necessary. Sometimes they just take too long.”

“Ellen, Dave, anything you’d like to add?” I asked.

“It depends on the meeting,” Ellen said. “Some of the meetings I attend are very efficient and productive, while others keep revisiting the same issues over and over while never really producing any action items.”

“I agree with everything that’s been said already,” said Dave, “but I’d also like to add my frustration with people constantly coming late and leaving early. In many of the meetings I attend, the same few people dominate the discussions and resort to personal attacks when they disagree.”95

“So let’s see what we’ve got,” I said. “Your list of meeting complaints include they’re unfocused and take too long, you revisit the same issues and fail to produce action items, people come late and leave early, the same few people dominate, and some participants resort to personal attacks. Those are pretty standard complaints. Any ideas as to what we can do about them?”

Agenda Fundamentals

“Well,” said Ellen, “one obvious solution for meetings that are unfocused, take too long, and keep revisiting the same issues is stick to the agenda.”

“That assumes that we have an agenda to begin with,” Al added.

“It also helps to distribute an agenda at least twenty-four hours in advance of the meeting so that people can come prepared,” I suggested. “This, of course, rarely happens and is another glaring example of failing to do what we already know. Why do you think something so obviously useful, like an agenda, gets so consistently neglected?”

“We’re just too busy,” said Brenda. “We start fighting fires and juggling priorities the minute we walk out of one meeting and don’t have a chance to catch our breath until the next one rolls around.”

“Sounds like we’ve got a pacing problem,” said Christi.

“Try reserving the last few minutes of your meetings to draft a preliminary agenda for the next one,” I suggested. “This takes it off your To Do list and helps address the problem of being too busy. It also allows the entire team to participate, which reinforces your commitment to broader inclusion. Finally, it ensures that everyone has a copy of the agenda in advance of your next meeting so they can come better prepared.”96

“But even with an agenda, how do you keep the meeting from running too long?” asked Brenda.

“Do you specify times for each item when you create an agenda?” I asked her in return.

“No, most of the time I don’t.”

“Again, it’s a simple thing but it usually does the trick. Everyone wants to get done on time and back to work as quickly as possible; time marks help the entire team meet that objective.”

“But what can we do about people who just love to hear themselves talk?” Dave asked with some exasperation.

“And let’s not forget the personal attacks,” Brenda added.

Using Ground Rules

“While the agenda helps focus the content side of the meeting, drafting a set of ground rules makes it a lot easier to manage the interpersonal challenges—particularly when you find yourself dealing with difficult people,” I told them.

“Ground rules provide a set of agreed-to guidelines that enable meetings to run smoothly and effectively. They include agreements such as

• start on time;
• stick to the agenda;
• no personal attacks, and so forth.

“In fact, they are so obvious,” I continued, “it almost seems like either an insult or a waste of time to bring them up at all. Don’t believe it! They may be elementary, but they are also consistently violated, and their neglect causes most of the frustrations that plague meetings.”97

“That’s all we need is a bunch of new rules,” said Al sarcastically, “and what is somebody going to do to me if I break one of them?”

“Do you play any sports, Al?” I asked him.

He seemed to register a certain surprise at the apparent incongruity of my question but responded, nonetheless, by saying that he participated in a company softball league.

“Do you have a set of rules you play by?”

“Of course we do,” he almost scoffed. “If you don’t have rules, you can’t play the game.”

“Exactly my point. We’re all just trying to play a game we call ‘business’ where we all hope to have some fun and make some money. People can’t play by the rules if they don’t know what they are. As we saw in the Project Game, when people are forced to guess at the rules, they wind up playing at cross-purposes. Meeting ground rules are not something anybody is going to impose on you. You will make them up yourselves so that you can all commit to playing the same game. Does this make a little more sense?”

“Yeah, I see your point. But how is that going to eliminate the time I waste listening to people go on and on about issues that don’t concern me?”

“Having an agenda and sticking to the agreed-on time marks should deal with that,” said Brenda.

Separate Status from Problem Solving

“That should help a lot,” I agreed. “Another important way to cut down on wasted time in meetings is to separate status review from problem solving. When a task owner fails to meet a planned completion date, a small subset of the meeting frequently dives into overly detailed technical discussions that hold little relevance or interest for the rest of the meeting participants.”98

“That’s it exactly,” said Al. “And I see what you’re attempting to do with this approach. Not having to sit through technical brainstorming sessions that have nothing to do with me would be great, but it also sounds like having to attend both status review meetings and separate problem-solving sessions is just going to increase my total number of meetings. That’s the last thing I’m looking for.”

“I understand your concern. You do not need to call additional meetings to tackle the problem solving,” I reassured him. “Just hold off on them until after the status review is complete. At that point, anyone who does not need to participate in the problem-solving session can get back to work.”

I explained that when a variance occurred, they should allow no more than five minutes for discussion about possible fixes within the status review meeting. If more time was needed, the people involved should continue their problem solving in the second portion of the meeting. By adhering to this simple practice, the length of many status review meetings could be cut in half. Then, by continuing with the problem-solving session immediately, you ensure that key action items are being addressed.

The Importance of Action Items

“I’m glad you mentioned action items,” said Christi. “The failure to complete action items confirms the widely held belief that meetings waste time. Why meet if nothing actually gets done? On the other hand, when people see that, week after week, the time and energy they invest in meeting pays off in meaningful change, their commitment level increases significantly.”99

“Thanks, Christi. Getting people to take accountability for action items is, in one sense, the underpinning of your entire project culture,” I said. “If you can’t trust people to do what they say, you can’t manage your project. Your meetings provide a practice field for refining this fundamental skill of making and keeping commitments.”

“If we implemented the few things we’ve just talked about, our meetings would improve a thousand percent,” said Dave. “My concern is that we walk out of here and everything slips back to business as usual. What can we do to make sure we actually do this stuff?”

Evaluating Success

“Try this quick end-of-meeting evaluation technique. At the end of each meeting, prepare a flip chart or whiteboard with a plus (+) column and a minus (–) column. Begin by asking people what they liked about the meeting, and record that in the plus column. Next, ask people what could go better next time and capture that in the minus column.

“The first time you try this, people may feel reluctant to criticize and so will offer humorous critiques that sound silly or trivial. For example, they might suggest that you have bagels as well as donuts. Whatever they say, just write it down,” I suggested. “Imagine their reaction when they walk into the next meeting and find bagels on the table. What message does that send?”

“They see that they’ve been heard,” said Dave.

“They also see that what they had to say actually made a difference,” Ellen added.

“Yes, and for many people that is a startling experience,” I agreed. “The more opportunities you can create for people to experience that they matter, that they are listened to, and that their contributions make a difference, the stronger your team becomes. This three-minute exercise provides an easy way to create that experience. It also leads to better meetings.”100

“It seems to me,” began Ellen, “that these five simple steps—agenda, ground rules, separate status review from problem solving, enforce action items, and conduct an end-of-meeting evaluation—reinforce the four fundamentals we’ve been discussing all day long.”

Change Your Meetings, Change Your Culture

“I would take it even a step further,” I added. “Meetings are a microcosm of a company’s culture. Change the meetings, and the culture starts to change as well. That’s the bigger payoff that can result from making these relatively minor adjustments.”

“I agree with all of that,” said Brenda, “but don’t we run the risk of seeming manipulative, trying all these new techniques?”

“You could,” I acknowledged. “It all depends on your intention. If you’re using these techniques so that you can have greater control, then you will probably be accused of being manipulative. If, on the other hand, your goal is to increase inclusion, invite commitment, and create greater opportunities for fulfillment, that’s probably what people will perceive. What people get are your true intentions. Besides, manipulative behavior tends to be a big waste of time and energy since we rarely succeed in changing other people’s behavior. We will experience much greater success and satisfaction by making sure that we do the right thing and let go of outcome.”101

Every project, every meeting, and every task we involve ourselves in presents us with a series of choices. Will our fight-or-flight-programming run us, or will we work from the zone? Do we run the whole race pedal to the metal or pace ourselves so that we can make the key connections and necessary turns? Can we resist our desire for control long enough to include others, so they can help us catch the missing Fs? And will we love ourselves and others enough to insist that both the people and the project be fulfilled?

These are the choices that frame a successful career and a meaningful life. Projects, by providing clear and immediate feedback to our actions, keep prodding us to become the people we really want to be.

FULFILLMENT GUIDELINES

• Change your meetings, change your culture.
• If you don’t have rules, you can’t play the game.
• What people get are your true intentions.