ARE YOU READY?

Before beginning the mentoring process in earnest, it is useful to gauge your personal readiness. You should be able to answer the following questions positively:

• Do I have a sincere interest in learning?
• Am I willing to commit time to developing and maintaining a mentoring relationship?
• Am I willing to work on my own growth and development?
• Am I willing to be open and honest with a mentoring partner?
• Am I willing to listen to critical feedback?
• Can I participate without adversely affecting my other responsibilities?
• Am I committed to being an active mentoring partner?

Once the decision has been made to find a mentor, it is time to choose the right one. The natural tendency is to zero in on chemistry when meeting with prospective mentors. If the chemistry doesn't feel right, the inclination is to go no further. A better approach is to identify specific criteria before choosing a mentor. Using the right criteria will help you avoid selecting a mentor who doesn't support your talent and will clarify the type of person you need. It will keep your focus on end results and minimize personal bias and low-level decision making. Beginning with the end in mind is a good start. Let's look at how Nick handled this.

Nick made a list of what he was looking for in a mentor. He definitely wanted someone from outside his organization and someone who could give him the perspective of a CEO. He also wanted someone who had a track record of good relationships with operations people. In addition, he wanted someone who would be accessible and would bring lots of energy and enthusiasm to the relationship. When Nick prioritized his needs, he decided that the most important criteria were the CEO perspective and accessibility.

Nick mentally scanned his LinkedIn connections. The people he had met at conferences, fundraisers, and trade shows were the first prospective mentors who came to mind. He considered his previous boss—like Charlie, a CEO—who also tended to micromanage but responded well when Nick pushed back. Suddenly he remembered Jon, a CEO he had met at a recent seminar. Nick instinctively felt that Jon would make a good mentor for him. He reviewed his list of criteria to validate his hunch.

When looking for a mentor, be sure to emphasize a good learning fit. Ask yourself questions such as these:

• Am I clear about why I want a mentor?
• Have I identified the specific qualities that I want in a mentor?
• Which of those qualities are nonnegotiable?
• Which of the remaining qualities are important to me?

The work you do in preparing to select a mentor informs your recruitment conversation with a prospective mentor, as was the case with Nick.

After taking a few moments to catch up with Jon, Nick got right to the point. “Jon, I am struggling with my CEO, Charlie. He can't seem to stop micromanaging, and I spend half my day smoothing ruffled feathers. I am at my wit's end. I have met with Charlie and tried to work through the situation, but we aren't getting anywhere. I really need some help, and if you are open to it, I'd like your guidance. I think you would be the perfect mentor for me at this time. First, you're a CEO and you have the perspective I need. Plus, from our conversations, I can see that you have a positive relationship with your operations people. I don't want to take too much of your time. Perhaps we could get together for lunch once a month and I could pick your brain and bounce some ideas off you.”

After you have met with a prospective mentor, it is important to ask yourself three questions:

• Does the prospective mentor truly meet my criteria?
• Is this a good fit?
• Does this person have the time, willingness, and sincere interest to mentor me?

If you are reasonably certain that the answers to all three questions are affirmative, you can launch into the serious work of preparing your relationship.