“Château de Rudenko”
Written by James Burke
AGAIN? NO. SERIOUSLY? IT’S GOT TO BE THE SAME ONE. It’s not? Look, I’ve been running for days. I’m not tired, it’s just the castles — they’re all the same! Identical turrets with narrow sawtooth battlements, minimal ramparts with thin arrow loops, and each structure features a distinct lack of plumbing. Also, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a guard here. (Or anybody for that matter.) What sort of economy supports this scale of production and such lax protection? It’s supposed to be a fortress, not an invitation to royal abduction. All I had to do was grab the flag.
I did find the builder. Hailing from the deep forests of Shorewood, Minnesota, is Andrey Rudenko, who, unlike my brother and everyone else I’ve ever known, seems to have greater than 8-bit resolution.
He’s unable to jump four times his height and he can’t shoot fireballs after consuming local flora. Despite these shortcomings he’s a talented engineer who managed to build a 3D printer to erect this edifice. Using a special mixture that is almost like a fine concrete, he printed and assembled the castle over the course of a couple weeks (not counting rain and zoning delays). The home-fabricated printer can scale to the size of a two-story structure and Rudenko’s aspiration is to use it to build houses.
The Château is quite impressive, even if it fails to protect royalty from every foe I’ve had to stomp on to get here. Rest assured: When I find Peach I’m going to let her know that she needs to get out of the real estate business and hire some more security. 
Andrey Rudenko
