Chapter 8

Practising Mindfulness in the Digital Age

In This Chapter

Making technology work for you rather than control you

Using technology mindfully to enhance communication

Introducing programs to help you focus

This chapter helps you to manage one of the most beneficial but also most challenging aspects of living in the information age – digital technology. Mindfulness offers you the presence of mind to be able to choose when to use technology, to identify what sort of technology you need and to recognise when a more real-world approach is called for. When you do use technology, you discover how mindfulness offers a way of working with it that involves a greater degree of presence, wisdom and compassion.

Choosing When to Use Technology

Technology includes any application of scientific knowledge for practical purposes. In the industrial age, technology was dominated by mechanical machinery driven by the steam engine. But in the 21st century, your daily life is probably dominated by digital technology. This recent explosion in the use of digital technology is impacting every single organisation in some way.

The evolution of the human brain didn’t take modern technology into account. So these changes are creating a big challenge, even for the powerhouse that resides in your skull. The pervasive use of technology often means that you may not even question your use of email or texting to communicate – mindfulness offers a chance to momentarily reflect before you immerse yourself in sending another deluge of messages out into the World Wide Web.

Recognising the pros and cons of technology

Digital technology certainly has many benefits in the workplace. Communication via texts and instant messaging is almost immediate. Video conferencing means that time isn’t wasted on travelling to meetings. Work can be completed on the move. With laptops and smart phones, you can stay connected and keep working in planes, trains and automobiles. And with the processing power of computers, technology is used to manage huge amounts of data from customers to help you decide how best to serve their needs.

Are there any drawbacks to the use of technology? We think so, especially if you use it unskilfully. Here are a few disadvantages that are often overlooked:

• Compulsive use of digital communication: Email can change from a tool to an addiction. Constant checking of email, even when other tasks are more pressing, wastes both time and energy and ultimately reduces the company’s productivity. See the sidebar ‘Checking messages can be addictive’.
• Reduced ability to focus: Too much use of technology can make you distracted, as you jump from one task to the next. A lack of extended time working on just one task reduces your brain’s ability to focus.
• Less face-to-face time: The more time you spend using technology, the less time is available for face-to-face meetings. This reduction in human contact can make working relationships a little shallower and result in lower levels of trust and understanding between people.
• Inefficiency resulting from multi-tasking: With technology comes the temptation to multi-task. Multi-tasking leads to reduced productivity and a lack of satisfaction. Chapter 18 explains why the ability to multi-task is actually a fallacy.

Mindfulness can help you to notice your new relationship with technology so that you’re more in control rather than being a slave to your digital devices.

Rebalancing your use of technology

Using technology too much is a problem. If you’re used to checking your phone every minute of the day for messages, you may struggle to concentrate when in a meeting or listening to your boss. Inefficient habits when online may mean that you end up surfing from one website to another instead of completing your tasks. And deciding to always communicate via technology rather than meeting face to face can lead to loss of opportunities to discuss new ideas and create a deeper and more trusting relationship with colleagues or customers.

Having described the downside to over-use of digital devices in the preceding section, you need to recognise that an aversion to technology can be an issue too. If you’re the CEO of the organisation and decide not to make best use of technology, your competitors may surpass you. Using outdated technology may frustrate your staff and mean that you struggle to attract the talent you need to succeed.

A balanced approach is the answer. Most companies have embraced the use of technology, and that’s probably a good thing. But you may not know how to use technology in a more mindful way so that you’re not in a constant state of distraction or miscommunicating with others as you respond on a purely emotional level. We think that a set of strategies is urgently required in the workplace to help individuals make more conscious choices in their use of technology.

One of the most effective ways of managing your technology is having downtime – time when you switch off from technology. Computers are different from humans. Computers work best if they’re never switched off. They can go on and on working without rest. However, if you stay connected and switched on without time to recharge, you burn out. Your attentional resources deplete rapidly, as do your energy levels, enthusiasm and intelligence. So having a few minutes, a few hours, a few days and sometimes a few weeks away from technology is key to your success. See the sidebar ‘Dealing with information overload’.

Here are a few ways to create digital downtime, based on how much time you have available:

• A few minutes: Take a few minutes break every half hour or so if you work on a computer all day. Taking a step back, concentrating on a few deep, conscious breaths and walking around are good for your body and mind.
• A few hours: When the work day is over, take a break from the screen. It’s very common for people to work on a screen all day, and relax at home by watching another screen. Refresh yourself by socialising, doing a spot of mindfulness practice, taking up a hobby or participating in sport.
• A few days: Take time off from technology every week. Aim for at least one day off per week if possible. Saturday is a good day for many people. See whether you can leave your phone behind, avoid checking email or social media and do something more natural and energising for you.
• A few weeks: If you can, take a few weeks holiday at least once a year. On holiday, see if you can have an extended period of time away from phones, computers and so on. This is probably when you’ll have your creative juices flowing as your mind comes up with unique solutions for challenges you’ve been facing in the workplace or home life. I’ve had some of my greatest business ideas whilst on a mindfulness retreat which involving mainly sitting, walking, stretching and had no access to phones, TVs or iPads. If you’re connected digitally every day, you’ll be amazed at how clear your mind becomes following a break from all that for a week or so.

Communicating Mindfully

Communication lies at the heart of being human. In the workplace, you’re bound to be communicating often with others. And when you’re not communicating with others, you’re communicating with yourself, being aware of your thoughts, emotions and even sensations in your body.

Mindful communication is about bringing a greater level of conscious awareness and reflection to how you communicate. With greater awareness, you’re better able to understand what others wish to express to you, as well as able to choose when and how to communicate your own thoughts.

Communication has been transformed by technology. Whereas in the past face-to-face conversations were the only way to communicate, you can now share your thoughts in lots of different ways. With the advent of the telephone, a person on the other side of the world was only a few button pushes away. And with the creation of the Internet came not only email but also live video chat via platforms such as Skype and Google Hangout – and free to boot! Finally, and most recently, communication has taken another step change with the creation of social media, dominated by Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn.

For example, just today I’ve been on social media to share a blog post, exchanged several emails about a meeting tomorrow, had two phone calls from colleagues about work on my website and exchanged three text messages and some ‘whatsapp’ messages. And this is a very typical day, where I kept my phone off for large chunks of the day whilst working on this book! If I didn’t know about that discipline of switching off technology, I would be getting disturbed all day.

Face-to-face conversations are now just one option and are often the option less chosen because of the investment of time required. Are face-to-face meetings worth the effort? Regular face-to-face interactions build up social networks in the brain through subtle visual cues and signals. If you spend thousands of hours online, you miss out on this training. Young people growing up in the modern age may have a reduced ability to socialise resulting from lack of face time.

Face-to-face communication has many inherent benefits that aren’t so easy to access online or over the phone. These benefits include:

• The personal touch: When you’ve met a colleague, customer or supplier in person, the relationship changes. You’re more likely to keep in touch and you have a clear image associated with that name. The in-person meeting can lead to conversations, ideas and insights that would never be discussed in other ways.
• Non-verbal communication: Spending time face-to-face means that you pick up all sorts of clues from a person’s body language that you won’t get via other forms of communication. This point is key. A pause when you mention the new deal may tell you that the other person is somewhat reluctant to commit to it. If you manage a salesperson via email alone, you never pick up that she speaks too loudly and quickly. You don’t understand the pressure your designer is under until you see his face. With this extra information, you can make better decisions.
• Teams work better when together: Research described in the Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication found that teams working face-to-face made fewer errors and reported improved teamwork and performance.
• Dealing with tricky situations: When a situation is slightly emotionally charged, a face-to-face conversation can work best. Positive non-verbal communication can help to diffuse unnecessary tension. Online communication may cause the difficulties to spiral into bigger problems if not nipped in the bud.

According to management guru Peter Drucker: ‘The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn’t being said.’

A mindful communicator choses what is the most effective form of communication and then gives that communication their full attention. Mindful communication also keeps in mind the limits of the medium of communication.

Below are seven forms of communication, rated hierarchically according to the level of feedback they provide – least to most:

1. Instant messaging: Expect instant replies. Little or no emotion. Fast.
2. Text: Very short; great for catching attention but too short for any meaningful communication. No emotional communication to couch the words spoken. The same message can potentially be read as positive or negative.
3. Email: Lacks any emotional feedback. Neutral emails can be read as negative or rude.
4. Social media: Some forms also include emotional feedback, but the stream of messages often scatter the attention thinly. Not often used in business environment, but this trend is changing.
5. Telephone: Tone of voice can provide much more feedback than previous methods. Needs to be used more, not less.
6. Video chat: Probably the best form of technology-based communication. Facial expression enhances the information exchanged. Some of the social network parts of your brain are receiving feedback and engaging.
7. Face-to-face meeting: The ultimate form of communication. Tone of voice, body posture, speed of speech and a wide range of facial expressions are clearly observable. No risk of technology breakdown. A handshake or friendly hug, together with eye contact, increase trust and improve well-being. Slow.

Emailing mindfully

Email is both incredibly convenient and incredibly stressful. As the existence of over 3 billion email accounts demonstrates, however, it is certainly popular.

Here are some facts about email:

• Over 100 trillion emails are sent every year
• The average office worker spends over a quarter of her day on dealing with emails
• The average employee sends and receives 40 emails a day, and 1 in 12 receives more than 100 emails a day

Email is a tool for your own use. When you check email when you need to, and respond efficiently, all may be well. But you may be in the habit of checking email too often, hoping for that next interesting message to come flying through.

Mindful emailing is using email with greater awareness and wisdom. The purpose of using email is to communicate for the benefit of both you and your recipient.

Try these tips to help you use email more mindfully and productively:

• Make a brief emailing plan: Use a notebook to jot down who you plan to send emails to and a few brief points that you want to make each day. Then, write those emails first. You can check new emails later. Making a plan may only take a couple of minutes but can save you hours of time reading and replying to emails that aren’t important.
• Watch out for email addiction: Decide in advance how many times a day you’re going to check your emails. For some people, once is enough; for others, once an hour is necessary. Unless your primary role is dealing with emails, you need to ensure that you’re not in the habit of constantly checking your inbox. If you find that even sticking to a nominal number of checks a day isn’t working, write down the actual times of day that you’re going to open your inbox. Imposing discipline on yourself in this way helps you retrain your mind so that you focus on what’s in front of you rather than being constantly distracted by often unnecessary messages.
• Breathe before sending: Before you send an email, take three mindful breaths. Doing so helps you to become more mindful, gives you an opportunity to reflect on what you’ve written and helps you to stay focused. Give it a try!
• See your email from the other person’s perspective: After you’ve taken your mindful breaths (see preceding point), imagine how the other person is going to feel when they read your email. You may decide that it needs editing before you send it. You may even give them a call instead!

  Chade-Meng Tan, the man behind mindfulness programmes at Google, recalls one staff member who tried this technique. Apparently, when this person said they’d tried something different and made a phone call, everyone in the room gasped! At Google, technology obviously rules.

• Send at least one positive email every day: Focusing on the good helps to rebalance your brain’s natural negativity bias and makes both you and your recipient feel better. Praise an employee for settling into the team so quickly, thank your boss for her help with the report yesterday or congratulate Michelle on her sales presentation. A positive email is a great way to start the day.

Control your emails; don’t let them control you. Choose who you want to respond to instead of reacting to every new email that lands in your inbox. Cultivate good email habits, such as limiting the time you spend on them and focusing only on those that are essential. Above all, be mindful and present as you deal with emails. Use your favourite mindful exercises before and after emailing to help you achieve greater focus.

Turn off your message notifications, so that you aren’t alerted each time a new one arrives. Doing so is your first step towards reducing the amount of time you waste in this way.

Phoning mindfully

One day one of our clients wanted to do something different. When he received a routine email from accounts, he decided to phone the sender rather than simply email his response. The phone seemed to ring for quite some time before a tentative voice said, ‘Hello?’ Our client told the woman that he was the Mark she’d been emailing for years but had never actually spoken to. They went on to have a pleasant conversation and Sarah in accounts said the call made her feel less like a machine and more like someone who actually works with other people. That encounter was certainly a wake-up call for our client!

Mindful phoning means bringing a greater degree of awareness to the process of being on the phone. With mindful phoning, you need to be aware of several things:

• What the other person is saying
• Their tone of voice
• What you want to say
• Your state of mind
• What you want to achieve from the conversation
• How you can be of help to the other person

Try this exercise next time you make a phone call:

1. Take a few moments to be mindful: Practise a short mindful pause by feeling your breathing, your bodily sensations or connecting with one of your senses.
2. Write down the aims of the conversation you’re about to have: This only takes a few seconds.
3. Stand up: If you usually sit down all day facing a computer, making a phone call provides a great opportunity to get to your feet and move your body around a bit.
4. Listen more than you speak: Make sure that you listen to the other person’s tone of voice as well as their actual words.
5. Be aware of your emotions. If the conversation makes you feel anxious or angry, notice the feeling in your body. Feel the emotion with your breathing and then speak from your wise mind rather than reacting automatically to your feelings, saying things you may later regret. Try to tap into greater levels of mindfulness as the conversation progresses. Breathing mindfully can help!
6. End the conversation when you need to, rather than dragging it out unnecessarily.

The key to mindful phoning is to do a short mindful exercise before phoning. Then you’ll be more focused and present during the call itself.

Using a smart phone mindfully

Smart phones are pretty smart. They can check emails, update social media, surf the web, take photos and make videos, edit videos, upload to YouTube, write a blog post, access loads of apps, work with documents, enable video chat, manage your calendar, help you find a restaurant, use global maps with GPS, tell you the time anywhere on the planet, let you read and listen to books, buy products and even learn mindfulness! Oh, I almost forgot: You can make phone calls too.

Smart phones are particularly addictive and can drain your mental focus and creativity when used excessively. A study of 1,600 managers conducted at Harvard University revealed that:

• 70 per cent check their phone within an hour of waking up.
• 56 per cent check their phone in the hour before they go to sleep.
• 51 per cent check their phone continually when they’re on holiday.

Compulsively checking your smart phone becomes a problem when it starts interfering with your everyday life. Reading your emails instead of listening to someone speaking in a meeting is one example. But what about scanning through your Facebook updates when you’re listening to a customer on the phone – such behaviour may cost you and your company lost revenue.

If you think that you need an injection of mindfulness to bring your smart phone habits under control, try these tips:

• Be conscious: When you feel the desire to check your emails or suddenly find yourself gazing at your beloved iPhone, ask yourself what emotion you’re feeling. What emotion are you trying to avoid? Anxiety, boredom, loneliness perhaps?
• Be disciplined: Turn off your device in certain situations, such as when you’re driving, attending meetings, playing with your children and eating supper with your partner – all the key moments in your day when focus is called for.
• Ride the wave: When you feel an urge to check your phone, take mindful breaths and be with the feeling rather than acting on it. Your compulsion should gradually weaken.
• Don’t give up: If you relapse into your 24/7 phone-checking habit, don’t feel defeated. Try again. You don’t need to beat yourself up about it. Your smart phone really is addictive, so be friendly to yourself and have another go.

If you can afford to do so, use one phone for work and another for your personal life. That way you can literally switch off from work at the end of the day.

Here are a few strategies to help you manage your smart phone with mindfulness:

• Don’t check your messages in the morning or evening.
• Switch off notifications on your phone except those for text messages.
• Set your phone on flight mode whenever you’re focusing on a piece of work.
• Turn off your phone when attending meetings, going for a walk or enjoying time with friends.

Engaging with social media mindfully

Social media, such as Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn, has changed the way many businesses operate. Entire companies have emerged to help organisation manage their social media – the way they connect with their customers and suppliers. And traditional advertising is finding itself working less effectively as social media is far more interactive, engaging and fun for consumers.

Here are some key principles to consider when using social media in a way that means personal and business use overlap, as often happens in small to medium-sized organisations:

• See business social media as part of your working day: So, when you’re with family, keep it off. Just as it would be rude to start checking your emails when your partner is talking to you, so too is using social media for business purposes.
• Update at set times: Update social media using apps such as Buffer or HootSuite so that you reduce the time you spend turning on and off all the separate social media channels.
• Be friendly: You can easily end up seeing people as just another number. They’re not – behind each connection is a human being. If they have a comment or question, do respond. If you’ve too many messages to respond to individually, acknowledge their comments in a group response.
• Seek to make genuine connections rather than superficial contacts: Customers will feel better for it, and so will you. And those connections may lead to more business.
• Give more than you receive: Seek to help others. Seek to help others. If someone has a question which isn’t directly related to your business, you can still help out. Just as you wouldn’t ignore someone in person who asked you a question, don’t ignore them when online either.

Writing mindfully

Pretty much every modern business in the world has a presence on the Internet. And websites need content. Although such content is increasingly in the form of video and audio, the Internet is still awash with the written word. To be successful online, you need to be able to write well or hire someone with that skill.

Writing effectively is also important for communication. Emails, text messages, reports and even presentations involve writing. So, how can you write in a way that engages your readers? And what does mindfulness have to contribute to the art of writing?

Having written five books, I (Shamash) have spent a lot of time in the last few years just writing. And here’s what I’ve learnt about writing in a mindful way:

• You need to look after yourself: Writing well requires that your brain is working at its optimal level. You can’t achieve this state for long if you’re feeling tired, hungry, cold or stressed out. Ensure that you go to bed on time and get enough sleep. Eat something every few hours, and make sure that meals contain plenty of fruit and vegetables. Keep a bottle of water to hand – the brain works much better when properly hydrated. Make sure that the room is at a comfortable temperature; you feel more relaxed as a result. Finally, if you’re under a lot of pressure take regular breaks and find time to socialise and exercise. Even if you’re facing a big deadline, try to prioritise breaks and make time for mindfulness practice. Doing so will make you more efficient.
• Timing is everything: Keep a time journal to identify at what time of day you’re most efficient. Then do your writing at that time. You need to make that time sacred – avoid phone calls, meetings, emails and any other distractions.
• Mindfulness exercises keep you focused: Practise mindfulness exercises as often as you can. Use the mindful body scan or do some informal mindfulness when you’re walking or eating. Try to connect with your senses whenever mindfulness comes to mind.
• Outside distractions need to be removed: To be able to write well, you need to focus. Block out as many distractions as you can. Silence your phone; don’t tell other people where you’re working; close all other programs on your computer.
• You need to manage your inner critic: You need to take that inner voice who judges everything you do in hand. For some reason, the process of writing really wakes it up! Fortunately, you can use mindfulness to manage your inner critic. First, you notice those negative thoughts and then you say to yourself ‘inner critic’ and have a little smile. Smiling sends a signal to your brain (neurons connect the brain to the muscles that are used to smile) that you’re not scared of that voice. Fighting or frantically running away from your inner critic can exacerbate its judgemental voice. Each time you address your inner critic in this way, you weaken its power until eventually, if you’re lucky, it dies altogether.
• Writing non-judgementally is a powerful tool: Mindfulness means moment-to-moment non-judgemental awareness. So, try a period of time just writing down whatever comes into your head, without judging it. Don’t correct sentences, delete words or fix spellings. Just go with the flow and write. Doing so is a true mindfulness process – being in the moment and allowing whatever arises to be as it is. Later on, you can go back and correct your mistakes.

If you write on a computer, lots of software is available to help you stay focused. I like to simply put Microsoft Word into ‘Focus’ mode. Then you just see the document you’re writing and all other windows disappear – ideal for you budding mindful writers out there! Another option is Ommwriter – available for Mac, PC and iPad.

Using Technology Mindfully

Can technology be used mindfully? We think that anything done with awareness, wisdom and compassion is a form of mindfulness. Although mindfulness has traditionally been associated with more natural surroundings, there’s no reason why mindfulness can’t be applied between uses and whilst using technology.

Technology can help to make you more mindful. Various phone apps, computer programs and online courses encourage greater mindfulness. Even a few computer games show you how to be more mindful or remind you to tune into your breathing.

Focusing on one task

Multi-tasking is actually impossible. When you multi-task, you actually switch from one task to another, creating the illusion of doing several tasks at once. Multi-tasking is often an inefficient way of working. Chapter 18 discusses multi-tasking in detail.

Are you a so-called multi-tasker? If so, you’re not alone – nowadays most people try and use multi-tasking to finish more work in less time. Multi-tasking can become particularly prevalent when using technology. But, alas, the strategy often backfires. The process can also lead to you feeling unfocused, making mistakes and getting wound up.

Here are some common examples of multi-tasking when using technology that lead to less efficiency rather than more:

• Having lots of windows open on your computer: Having too many windows open not only slows down your computer, making your work take longer to do, but also makes you more likely to move between one task and another, rather than finishing one task and then starting the next.
• Emailing while working: Most people leave their email program open all day and reply to messages as they arrive. Doing so distracts you from your work and can leave you feeling frazzled by the end of the day. Try turning your email notification off for a day to see what happens.
• Sending texts while crossing the road: Typing a text message needs your full attention. You’re breaking the law if you use your mobile phone while driving, for good reason – you can’t concentrate fully on two things at once. The same applies to crossing the road.
• Using your phone or computer while eating lunch: Make time for a break at lunch. Applying a mere 15 minutes of mindfulness helps you make better choices about what you eat and aid your digestion. If that’s too hard for you, try just a few minutes of eating without distractions. Your whole afternoon may go more smoothly if your lunchtime is a bit more mindful. One of our clients decided to have a relaxing lunch in the local park every day, no matter how busy she was. In the end, several colleagues joined her. Because staff burnout was a big problem in their company, they were making a wise choice to rest at lunchtime.
• Using digital technology while driving: It can be tempting to check emails, send texts and see who’s up to what on Facebook while behind the wheel. If you lack mindful awareness, you may easily develop this dangerous habit. See Chapter 4 for more on mindful driving.

If you’re a multi-tasker and are convinced that doing several tasks works for you, then so be it. But if you feel life is too frantic and would like to explore a different way of working, give single-tasking a try, even for short blocks of time. Do one thing at a time, with your full attention and see what happens. Start with 10 minutes or half an hour – whatever you can manage.

Try keeping just one browser window open at a time on your computer. Doing so makes you feel more focused and efficient. Complete the task you need to do with that window and then close it.

Discovering technology that enhances focus

As well as all the methods of discovering mindfulness that are available online, programs to enhance your focus also exist. They block Internet access or analyse how you’ve used your time while on the computer. We describe a few of them below.

SelfControl (http://selfcontrolapp.com)

SelfControl for Mac is a free program that can be used to block whatever websites you find yourself wasting time on. So, for example, you can block access to your Facebook and Twitter accounts as well as your email, for a time period of your choice. I (Shamash) like using this for several hours during the day when I need to focus on writing or just need a break.

Freedom (www.macfreedom.com)

The whole Internet itself can seem like a distraction sometimes. This program works on Mac, Windows and Android and blocks complete access to the Internet for whatever period of time you choose.

RescueTime (www.rescuetime.com/)

If you use your computer a lot, RescueTime may be a good program for you. It runs in the background and keeps a record of how long you spend using different programs during the day. It then uses the data to calculate how productive you are. The program presents graphs to show you at which parts of the day you were most productive, and which periods of time you spent surfing the Internet, reading blogs and so on. The amount of detailed feedback this program provides is fascinating. The basic version of the program is free too.

For more information on technology to enhance your mindfulness, see the resources section in Chapter 20.