Chapter 6

When You Speak

More than 75 percent of new contacts make their decision about whether or not to do further business with you during the initial phone call. Make that initial phone contact and all the succeeding ones, the very best possible. We use office phones, cell phones, conference calls, and speaker phones to get business completed. The person you talk with on the phone cannot see the size of your office, your office furnishings, or you. All their conclusions about you, your business, and your ability to deliver what you promise, are based on your voice and your words and how well they convey courtesy and respect. What kind of an impression do you leave when you speak on the telephone?

Your voice is your vehicle for communication. Record a phone call or tape-record yourself speaking and listen to your voice. You want to speak loudly and clearly enough for people to hear you easily. If people ask you to repeat things you say, you may not be speaking loudly enough. Make certain that your voice is pleasant and causes people to want to listen. Practice your speaking to develop variety in pace, modulation, and pitch. The way you speak impacts the way you are perceived. Is your voice pitch high (shrill) or very low (deep)? Listen to your voice with an unbiased friend who will help you evaluate the quality and listening appeal of your voice. The most comfortable listening range falls within the medium range. High-pitched voices are more difficult to understand and are often perceived as unprofessional. Speech, voice, or drama coaches can help you improve your voice. You’ll hear results right away, and they’ll make a positive impact on your professionalism.

Your voice and words are essential to making a positive impression and portraying your professionalism. Using proper telephone manners will help you build friends and clients, develop and keep a good reputation, and lead to success.

TELEPHONE ETIQUETTE

Whenever you speak on the telephone, speak clearly and directly into the mouthpiece. Identify yourself immediately to the other person. Speak slowly and with courtesy. Focus yourself on the purpose of the call and the person you are speaking with; don’t try to do things like open mail or talk with someone in the room with you in the course of your telephone conversation. Don’t eat or drink while you are on the phone. You may not be aware of how well the person at the other end of the line can hear you chewing and swallowing; the impression you leave will not be a good one. Smile as you speak. You’ll be surprised how well a smile can be heard in your voice.

Making Phone Calls

Be prepared before you dial. If this is an information gathering call, have a script handy so that you will remember to cover all the information.

Know the reason for your call and be ready to discuss it.

Place your call during normal business hours. Your call will not be well received if you wait until five minutes before closing.

Be ready to leave a message with an assistant or receptionist if the person you wish to talk with is unavailable.

Make your own calls. Asking your assistant to get a client on the phone implies to the client that your time is more valuable than theirs.

Answer phone messages left for you within forty-eight hours, whenever possible. If you are away for more than a day, it is courteous to your callers to so indicate in your message unless someone is taking your calls for you.

Answering Phone Calls

If you are the administrative assistant or receptionist who handles incoming calls for your company, you are the voice of the company. You are the first contact a person has with your business whether you are a one-person office or a large corporation. This is true for anyone who answers incoming calls, regardless of their position. You can make a good impression when speaking on the phone when you

Answer by the third or fourth ring.

Identify yourself immediately.

Speak slowly, clearly, and with courtesy.

Speak with a smile in your voice.

Use the caller’s name.

Have pen and paper handy to make notes or take a message.

Minimize background noise.

End the call with a positive statement and an acknowledgment of the caller.

“Please Hold”

There will be times when you will need to put callers on hold. Only put callers on hold for a few seconds. If the call is being transferred, make sure the other party picks up the phone in a reasonable amount of time. If they do not, pick up the call again, acknowledge the caller by name, and ask if they would like to continue to hold or if they would rather leave a message.

If you must leave the line to answer a call-waiting call, make sure you leave the first caller on hold for only a few seconds, and acknowledge the caller by name when you return. Remember that call-waiting is a convenience for you, not your caller. When you ask the first caller to wait while you answer a second call, you imply that he is less important than the new caller. Make your connection with the second caller brief; return their call promptly when you finish with the first caller.

If you need to transfer a call, explain the reason for the transfer to the caller. Monitor the lines to be certain the transfer was completed successfully.

Sometimes, you may be required to answer someone else’s phone while they are away from their desk or to answer the phone for others in your office. This can be challenging when you must answer questions or provide information that you do not have. The best response is to take a message. Be sure that there are phone message pads and pen where you will answer the phone. Ask for the caller’s name, phone number (repeat it for accuracy), reason for the call, and best time to return the call. Add your name or initials and the date and time of the call to the message.

A courteous response to the caller is that the person they wish to reach is unavailable. You may add that they are with a client, in a meeting, or have stepped away from their desk for a moment. Be aware that you want to leave a professional image with the caller. It is not important for the caller to know exactly where the person is, what they are doing at the moment, or even where you think they might be. In fact, to offer this level of information may betray confidentiality and imply that you are not careful about preserving confidentiality for your colleagues or your clients.

Handling Difficult Callers

Sometimes callers are rude and unreasonable. You may not know why they are rude or unhappy, but you can influence the outcome of the call and perhaps regain the caller’s goodwill. Begin by remaining calm and speaking in even tones. Ask the caller to identify himself and ask the reason for the call. Speaking softly will encourage the caller to calm down and not shout. If the caller uses obscenities, ask them to use other language. Explain that you can’t help them if they won’t help you. When speaking with the caller, address him as Mr. Jones and sir (use ma’am with a woman caller).

Angry people are not ready to listen. They must get their anger out before they will be able to listen to you. Encourage them to explain the problem or why they are unhappy. Restate the problem to them, and offer to transfer them to the appropriate department or suggest someone with whom they should speak. Offer to see if that person is available and, if not, offer to take a message. You may be able to diffuse some of the caller’s anger just by listening attentively. This will make your colleague’s job easier when he has to talk with this caller and will leave the caller with a more positive impression of your company.

VOICE MESSAGING SYSTEMS

Voice messaging systems were developed to provide more efficient customer service and to improve the productivity of office staff. Unfortunately, many customers wait a long time through layers and layers of messages making numerical choices based on questions asked to them. They often never get to a real person and either are asked to leave a message or have to hang up and start the process over again.

Voice messaging systems serve a purpose but they can be frustrating to callers. Frequently callers have difficulty knowing which selections to make to have their question answered. They are left feeling frustrated; the company has lost their personal touch and perhaps a customer. We’ve probably all had experiences with a voice messaging system. Maybe you’ve come across a message like the following.

 

Hello, you have reached ACE Company. To order a product—press 1, to ask about a charge on your bill—press 2, to review your bill—press 4, to speak to the operator—press 0. Hello, you have reached the automated system for ACE. If you wish to speak to someone about a warranty—press 1, if you wish to speak to a customer service representative—press 3, if you wish to speak to the operator—press 4. Hello, you have reached the automated system for ACE. To report a lost or stolen card—press 1, to increase your credit limit—press 2, to speak to an operator—press 3.... pause... Hello, all our operators are busy helping other customers. Your call is important to us so please stay on the line . . . music . . . we estimate the next available service representative will be with you in five minutes.

When someone finally answers, you may have reached a department in error and have to start the system over again, or the person you’ve reached may not know how to transfer you to the correct department and you may get cut off (and have to start over again).

Some voice messaging systems allow callers to bypass the message by pressing a specified telephone button such as the pound (#) key. If your message system has a long message and you have frequent callers, tell them how to bypass the remainder of the message early in the message.

Call your own company or business and put yourself in the shoes of your client or customer. I know a company president who was traveling on business. He phoned the company to speak with one of his sales managers but couldn’t get through. In desperation, he called the customer service line and got locked into the voice message loop. He was shocked by how inefficient and frustrating the system was. Does your company answering machine message or voice message system leave a positive impression? You may wish to periodically check your own message system to be sure.

YOUR TELEPHONE GREETING

When leaving a telephone greeting on your answering machine or voice mail system that will be heard by your callers speak slowly and state your name, company, and/or phone number. Keep the message brief; some systems will only allow thirty to sixty seconds for your greeting. Ask the caller for specific information, for example, “Please leave your name and phone number.”

If you have unlimited time for your greeting, you can make the message interesting and fun. You can play music in the background, leave a favorite quote, or make a comment about business or life. Whatever you choose, consider its impact on the positive impression you want your message to make on your clients.

If the caller can bypass the message, give instructions on how to do so in the message. If you can be reached by pager or other means, include instructions to that effect also.

LEAVING A MESSAGE

When leaving a message for someone you have called speak slowly and clearly. Leave your name, phone number, and a brief message. Say your phone number slowly; many people repeat the number so quickly that the recipient can’t write it down or hear the numbers. If you say the number too fast, you may not get the return phone call. Give your phone number twice when leaving a message, once at the beginning of the message and again at the end. Mention the best time to return your call.

If you don’t really need a return call, it is considerate to leave enough information about why you are calling to enable the person you’ve called to take care of the matter. For instance, if you’re calling to confirm your lunch appointment, remind the individual of the date, time, and place. Let them know they don’t need to call you back unless there is a problem or they need to reschedule. It is always proper etiquette to leave your phone number even if you know they have it; your thoughtfulness will save them the time and effort of looking up your number.

At the end of the message leave your name and phone number again, as a courtesy to the recipient so they don’t have to rewind the tape if they didn’t hear your name or phone number clearly the first time.

CELL PHONE ETIQUETTE

Is the person with whom you are eating lunch, having a meeting, attending a conference, church, concert, or other event less important than someone who might call you on your cell phone? When you answer your cell phone without considering those around you, you send them the message that they aren’t as important. Having a cell phone is not a status symbol; in fact it may be a rudeness badge. Cell phones are a modern technology convenience to allow us to keep on top of every business deal and to be quickly accessible to anyone who might have a question or need assistance. But there is a price to pay for that instant availability.

When your cell phone is on, you are at the beck and call of all who have your number. You will feel a need to answer and act on calls as if they are more urgent than your current activity. You risk being interrupted and distracted at inappropriate and inconvenient times. It is not necessary for everyone to have your cell phone number; be thoughtful about who you want to be able to reach you by cell phone.

Cell phones are most effective when used to call for help, to collect messages, and to make urgent calls while away from the office. If you are driving alone in slow traffic, a call may make efficient use of your time.

Cell phone use is inconsiderate of those around you when you use it in enclosed public places such as restaurants, elevators, subways, airplanes, buses, and trains. Your call may be annoying to others in churches, synagogues, concerts, theaters, waiting rooms, courtrooms (you could be fined or asked to leave), or other quiet public places.

And remember, when you use your cell phone, make sure you don’t say anything you wouldn’t want to be repeated or stated on a billboard.

I was disturbed by a man who paced the dentist’s waiting room and conducted a business call while I sat within earshot of every word. I was annoyed, as was the office staff. Such behavior is rude and inconsiderate. I imagine the person on the other end of the phone would not have been pleased if they’d realized their call was so public. It would have been better for the man to step outside or sit in his car for the time it took to transact the call.

 

At a luncheon program, the woman across the table took out her cell phone, dialed, and then covering her mouth to muffle her voice, proceeded to conduct “quiet” business. Her actions were rude to the luncheon speaker (who was in the midst of his speech), to those at her table and, in fact, to all in seeing and hearing distance. If you need to be working or checking important messages, leave the table and move to a private place where you won’t disturb others. Do not assume that just because you turn your back to the crowd or cover your mouth while you talk on the phone that you are practicing acceptable etiquette. Talking on your cell phone, allowing the ring to be heard or a pager to beep, is rude and annoying to the others around you no matter where you are.

Cell phone use while driving increases the risk of auto accidents by more than 30 percent. Consider using an ear phone accessory with your cell phone to keep your hands free while driving. Pull your car over to the side of the road or onto a side street if you receive a business call. You will be better able to focus on the individual calling and the business under discussion. Your caller will appreciate the implication that his call is important to you. Otherwise, you are creating a dangerous situation for other drivers and their passengers. Always ask yourself, “Do I need to make or take this call at this moment?” Beware of jeopardizing the safety of others.

If you use a cell phone:

Don’t force others who happen to be wherever you are to listen to your cell phone calls.

Don’t call your cell phone friends from outside of their area code if you can avoid it, especially since they will be paying for the long-distance charges.

Don’t drive under the influence of an absorbing conversation.

Don’t ask to use a friend’s cell phone.

Don’t call friends who reserve their cell phone only for emergencies.

Observe the rules of common sense and good etiquette when using cell phones. A simple way to remind yourself of the on or off status of your phone is to wear it on your waist when it is on and you are accepting calls, and put it in your briefcase or bag when you don’t wish to receive calls and your phone is off. Call a cell phone only if the individual has instructed you to call or if you have determined that an immediate answer is imperative.

If you need the convenience of a cell phone when traveling abroad you can rent a global cell phone through your local wireless carrier. By making the arrangements with my carrier, I can continue to use my U.S. cell phone number as I travel.

VIDEOCONFERENCING

Videoconferencing is increasingly common even though it involves a considerable initial investment. It requires that all the individuals have a video camera and compatible software on their computer. The computer needs a camera installed above the monitor as well as software and hardware compatible with that of others participating in the videocon-ference. We see more videoconferencing as a mode of communication because it helps to avoid the long, frequent, and/or expensive flights to attend important meetings. Videoconferences minimize travel costs, reduce wear and tear on the travelers, and save time. Critical documents can be sent in advance by fax to increase the effectiveness of the video-conference.

Videoconferencing is practical but comes with challenges. Some rules of etiquette need to be closely followed or disaster can result. Interrupting a speaker is one of the biggest problems. It takes some practice to know when to interject your own comments during a conference with others. Greater emphasis is placed on facial expressions, voice, word choice, gestures, and body language because the element of personal contact is missing. Your gestures and habits are magnified by video. Precise, concise communication is important. There is little allowance for looking around, nose rubbing, ear pulling, or grooming. Videoconferencing is not like telephone communication; your every movement is in view. Your appearance is critical for professional credibility and for making an effective presentation.

Videoconferencing is used by medical specialists to consult on critical patients or operations, for depositions and other legal purposes, for meetings of a company’s board of directors, and for a variety of other meetings and consultations.

The same rules of etiquette apply to videoconferencing that apply to other business meetings and appointments. Electronic setup and advance preparation time is required. Confirm the appointment well in advance, have equipment on and tested, and be ready and smiling at the appointment time. Keep to the agenda, which has been sent to the other parties prior to the meeting. Keep track of time with a nearby clock. This is your opportunity to make your professional impression with style and confidence. Look at the camera, avoid offensive gestures or habits like gum chewing or yawning, and keep your hands away from your face. Sit straight in your chair to project a competent professional.

TELECONFERENCING

Teleconferencing by phone is a practical way to conduct a meeting. All participants should follow the guidelines set by the chair. The chair calls the meeting and maintains full control of the meeting to avoid digression. The chair should call the roll by having everyone introduce themselves with their self-introduction, (see Introducing Yourself, Chapter 1, The First Impression) including any specifics asked for by the leader. The rules for speaking need to be outlined and reiterated if someone does not follow them.

Voice-only communication forces attention to your voice inflection and word choice. The basic rules for teleconferencing are the same as those for any business communication: don’t interrupt, keep on the subject, and avoid negative comment of others. Without body language, which is a major part of your communication, you must rely primarily on your words and voice to communicate your ideas. Enunciate clearly and smile often. You project positive inflections in your voice when you smile.

Everyone must call in on time, as prearranged. The leader must be specific about the time and the time zone so that everyone knows when the meeting is scheduled to begin. An agenda should be distributed before the call and reiterated at the beginning of the conference call itself.

The cost per participant will vary depending on the long-distance provider so beware if you are “on the road” and calling in for period of time. You may wish to use an 800 number if one is available for this purpose. Some organizations call each of the participants from the central meeting point and thus absorb the telephone costs for the participants.

When participants speak, they should preface their remarks by stating their name. Participants may be assigned speaking turns, or the session may be an open discussion. It is essential that there be no “out of turn” interruptions. If you wish to speak, wait for a pause to begin your contribution. Keep the discussion to the business or agenda of the meeting.

At the end of the conference the leader should summarize the discussion, close the conference, and thank the participants. A written outline should be e-mailed or faxed to participants within three days of the call. Teleconferencing can be very useful to gather people from many different locations together. The leader must maintain control of the discussion to keep it on the topic and moving forward.

THE ART OF CONVERSATION

Making conversation is a skill that can be improved. The art of making conversation is cultivated. Choose your topics carefully when conducting business. Avoid topics of religion, politics, diet, personal philosophy, spouses, ethnic jokes, and health. Conversing is easier for some people than for others, but practice and thought help to master the art. Asking questions and giving compliments are part of good conversation. People like to talk about themselves and their activities, so learn to be a good listener.

When making compliments, be sincere. You needn’t respond to a compliment with a compliment. Be cautious about giving compliments to everyone all of the time. Compliments that make mention of body parts, necklines, clothing fit, and how someone walks or moves, could be grounds for harassment regardless of your intentions.

Accepting a compliment can seem awkward. When someone pays you a compliment, your response need only be, “Thank you, I appreciate your noticing,” or just “Thank you.” Often we feel a little embarrassed and think that we have to make some qualifying response. When someone compliments your tie or dress and you respond, “Oh, this old thing!” you are, in a sense, rejecting their compliment. Instead, just smile and say “Thank you.”

Keep in mind that you are creating and maintaining a relationship. Be friendly and use common sense while being courteous and respectful. Learn to talk about subjects other than your work. You want to be perceived as well-rounded and informed on a variety of subjects, not just by the people you meet, but also by your employer. Your career advancement may hinge on your ability to discuss subjects other than your work.

Naturally, there will be times when it is appropriate for you to talk about work. When you talk about work, be aware of the others with whom you are speaking. Every industry has its own language and not everyone will be familiar with yours. You’ll have a better conversation and communicate your ideas more clearly if you avoid jargon and industry-specific terms. After all, the goal of all communication is to enhance understanding, not to confuse. Your listeners will appreciate your efforts.

Conversation Topics

Ask the other person questions about vacations, movies they’ve seen recently, any books they may have read recently, whether they follow any of the local sports teams, or even if they see any trends in the business market. Pursue subjects they are interested in.

Some subjects of conversation are best avoided. These include

Religious topics

Politics

Diet and weight

Talking about your spouse, except in general terms

Talking about coworkers

Gossip

Criticism

Swear words

Jokes with ethnic undertones

Lengthy personal stories

To prepare yourself for conversation, try reading the daily paper, trade journals, or weekly magazines. When reading the newspaper, look for interesting articles in the following sections:

Sports pages

Lifestyle sections

Business section

Travel section

Book and movie reviews

There are many sources for conversation topics. Be creative, follow your own interests and try new things. Radio and TV news programs are good sources for current events and what others think of them. Lectures and conferences are held on a variety of subjects and may spark a new interest or suggest a new perspective on a familiar subject. It’s always fun to attend plays, concerts, and sporting events, and these are all interesting to talk about with others. Perhaps you are involved in your community and would enjoy sharing information about community activities.

You certainly don’t need to be an expert in all topics. Read the headlines and skim through a paragraph or two of the articles that interest you. Having some comments on a few current subjects can serve as an excellent way to get a conversation going.

As you converse with others, listen, laugh, and smile often. Be aware of how your body language and gestures encourage those you are speaking with to relax and to participate. Don’t take yourself so seriously that you can’t laugh at yourself. We all have stories to tell, many humorous. If appropriate, share one of yours!

The only way that you can meet and talk with interesting people is to be one yourself. Cultivate your own interests, pick and choose the articles, programs, and places that interest you. Continue to learn new things; that is what makes you an interesting person.

My 87-year-old mother is interesting to talk with. She watches sports and knows who has won or lost. She reads the paper and can talk about a variety of TV programs. She also watches game shows for trivia information.

Naturally, there will be times when you need to leave or close a conversation during a party or social function. There are many ways you may close a conversation gracefully by following some etiquette guidelines. You may excuse yourself with the explanation that you would like to go to some other area or activity at the function, perhaps the buffet table or exhibit table; make sure you actually go there, not to another conversation. Tell the person you’ve enjoyed talking with them and suggest you both move on to meet others. Another method is to thank them for their interest in your business and wish them well in their own.

If you are talking with a small group and you notice another person who might like to join your conversation, step back to open the circle of the conversation. By turning your body slightly toward the newcomer you use your body language to invite him to join the conversation. Once this person begins to join in the conversation, you may excuse yourself from the group. Proper etiquette requires that you not leave a newcomer alone and move on to speak to others until you draw a new person into the current conversation.

Magic Words

Most of us learned about “magic words” when we were growing up. The magic in the words comes from how they are used to express respect and courtesy towards others. Using the magic words evokes a response that affects attitude, body language, and emotion in the person to whom you are speaking. Use them everyday. They will smooth the path of your career and improve your relationships with others, both business and social.

Please	Thank you
You’re welcome	Excuse me
I’m sorry	Hello
Good morning	Good night
Good-bye
How are you? (Be sure you listen for the response!)

It is simple to weave these words into your everyday conversation. When you use these words regularly you will quickly note how much more willing people are to listen, respond, and agree to your requests. We bristle and resist when we are pushed verbally or physically. Using the magic words makes a difference in your communication and in the responses you receive to your ideas and requests.

PUBLIC SPEAKING

Public speaking and making conversation are two essential skills in the business world. Being an interesting person to others takes effort on your part. Your colleagues and clients will more likely want to spend time with you and to seek your advice when you have evidenced a broad knowledge and interest in a variety of subjects. No one expects you to be an expert in everything. Develop a hobby, attend local musical performances, read a few books, and travel. Learn the history of your area. Knowledge does not suddenly descend upon you; it is a lifetime pursuit.

Many people can only talk about business or their work. Their life is so focused on their career that it negatively impacts their ability to make new friends or contacts. Being too narrow in your conversation topics can impede your chance for promotion or for a new position in a different department. You should be skilled at speaking about your business, but not to the exclusion of all other topics.

In the course of a business career, almost everyone will have the opportunity or assignment to speak in public. You may be asked to make a presentation in the boardroom or at a sales meeting. Your boss may ask you to speak at an annual meeting, make a toast at a party, or present a project to a group of colleagues. If the thought of speaking in front of people strikes fear in your heart, you’re not alone. Speaking in public is the number one fear most people share. If you are in business, and you want to be a success, you can expect to be called upon to speak at some time.

Here are some suggestions to help you prepare before you panic. Accept the fact that it will happen; you are going to speak in public. Next, develop your basic skills. It is important to know how to prepare a talk, write a presentation, time it (to fit time limitations), speak well, avoid distracting phrases and gestures, and be comfortable speaking before an audience. A number of organizations can help you, or you may take a class. Join a Toastmasters International group in your area. Most groups meet weekly for the specific purpose of practicing speaking before a group. Different Toastmasters Groups meet at different times of the day. They are generally a small and supportive group and offer you the opportunity to practice and learn basic skills. Your local chamber of commerce should be able to direct you to the groups in your area, or call Toastmasters International at 949-858-8255 (California).

More help is available from speech coaches, drama coaches, speech-writers, college courses on public speaking, and personal business coaches. You may also call the National Speakers Association (NSA) headquarters in Tempe, AZ, at 602-968-2552. They can direct you to someone in your area who can be of assistance. You can also look on the Internet for http://www.nsaspeaker.org or http://www.toastmasters.org to get started. There are many NSA members around the country who will gladly give you some pointers on how to improve your speaking skills.

Once you master the skills to speak well in front of others, you’ll avoid heart palpitations and knee shaking. You’ll be able to present your thoughts concisely and to feel comfortable, competent, and credible. You are not expected to be a fabulous speaker, but you will be respected for getting your point across clearly and with validity. It is not such a difficult task when you set your mind to it. Begin now to develop and polish your skills as a speaker; you will use them frequently in your career.

Verbal Style

Polishing your speaking skills requires consideration of your verbal style and voice. Each of us has a speaking style that we develop and modify over time. Your style reflects your inner being and is shaped by your experiences and education. You can modify your style to suit new situations and goals. You change your verbal communication by selecting precise words, using complete sentences, speaking without slang and dialect, and using the appropriate language for the industry and location.

Good enunciation and careful choice of words should be high on your improvement list. Your credibility and ultimately your level of promotion within the company will be affected by your speech. Pronounce words clearly and correctly. Avoid slurring syllables and dropping sounds from the ends of your words. Speaking too softly, using slang, and mumbling leave negative impressions. You and your immediate colleagues may all speak the same way, but if you have aspirations for a position in management or a position in another location, the way you sound when you speak and your verbal style will be important in achieving your goal.