Having a corporate strategy is usually a top priority. Unfortunately, having a criticism strategy is not. It's been my experience that few people report taking time to plan out exactly what they want to say and how they want to say it. The usualmodus operandi is to express the thoughts as you feel them—which is usually negative.
How about you? Are you a strategic criticizer? Recount the last time you criticized a coworker. How much time did you actually take in preparing your thoughts before you offered them? Or did you criticize off-the-cuff with spontaneous negative remarks—caustic, sarcastic, blaming, or accusatory ''you are wrong'' statements—that produced resentment instead of improvement?
People who consistently tap into the power of positive criticism are strategic: They actively take responsibility for how they communicate. They see themselves as a directive force, with the goal being to get their recipient to take their criticism productively. They recognize that the communication process itself is influential and that the more active they become in it, the more they can influence how their recipient responds.
Having this active philosophy is crucial because it entails advance planning—it forces you to become aware of what you want to accomplish, what you are actually going to say, and how you are going to say it.
With this awareness, you give yourself the opportunity to ''hear your criticisms'' and decide whether or not you are going about it in the best way.
Many people point out that they do not have the time to plan in advance how they can best criticize someone. It is indeed true that things happen on the job that demand an immediate response. And because of the spontaneity and emotionality of the situation, we are caught off guard. Our destructive patterns of criticizing quickly emerge, making the situation worse.
Fortunately, we also know of specific times at work in which we frequently have to point out a wrongdoing. When I pose the question to a group of sales managers, ''How many of you know situations in advance in which you will have to give criticism?'' almost everybody raises their hands.
Most sales managers have a pretty good idea of the criticisms they will eventually have to give their new sales recruits. The same is true for a supervisor of student teachers, nurses, or flight attendants. These situations, the criticisms we know we are going to have to give, provide us with a rich opportunity to develop our criticism skills.
The sales manager who knows he is going to have to criticize his subordinate's first-time sales presentation for being too long and impersonal can begin to think, ''How can I say this so that he will be most receptive.'' The nurse who knows she will have to tell her student practitioner that he is neglecting his patient's need to talk will be able to plan in advance the best way to do it. When the moment of truth comes, they are ready. Instead of blurting out destructive comments, they can make their point skillfully because of their preparation and thus positively influence behavior. At the very least, their strategic thinking prevents them from making the situation worse.
What is the trick to becoming a strategic criticizer so that you can use the power of positive criticism? Your best bet is to practice by identifying a situation in which you are required to give criticism. Before you give the criticism, ask yourself the following questions:
Exactly what do I want to communicate?
What do I want to change?
What are my motives for expressing this criticism? (If a subordinate's performance made you look bad, you may be angrily passing down your boss's criticism in a nonproductive manner. Beware of those times when your motive is to get even.)
What specific solutions and goals can I offer, and what can I do to help the person achieve these goals?
You will also get yourself in the habit of being a strategic criticizer by making a checklist of key questions that you find helpful to ask yourself before you give criticism. If you faithfully use your checklist, you will automatically ask yourself those questions in future criticism situations.
What about those unforeseen situations that require an immediate response? All you need to do is to remember that before you give the criticism—whether it is to a subordinate, coworker, team member, client, or customer—ask yourself the strategic question: ''How can I communicate this information so the person will be receptive?'' Inevitably, your answer will help you get the power of positive criticism.