A Final Word

There is no one moment that defined my journey as a communicator. There were many.

This moment is for you. It's a moment to stop, think, and ponder. Now you are the coach, and your number one client is yourself.

Think of your whole story. Let's track your communication skill over your whole life. Hold the book in one hand and put your other hand out and down. That was you when you were born. Wow, you were cute. Then move your hand a little to the right. Your skill improved a lot when you mastered this whole words thing, and over the next few years, you became a bit of a chatterbox. (My friend Paul Begala has a funny way of looking at this as a parent. He says, "The first year, you can't wait for them to say their first word and take their first step. For the next 17 years, you are trying to get them to sit down and be quiet.") As your hand moves up through your lifetime, you see where you've had little and big jumps in skill and passion and where you were on a plateau.

Now you have taken some big steps up and are at this moment. Remember Yogi Berra's famous saying: "When you get to the fork in the road, take it." You've absorbed some knowledge, learned new tools and techniques, and—depending on how much you have been practicing already—seen some growth. You can stay on this new plateau just by practicing occasionally. You may backslide if you don't practice.

Or you can keep taking the path of continuous enjoyment and continuous improvement. Notice little things. Try new things. Believe. Affirm yourself and your own style. Your personality and your sense of humor are perfect for you. You are always the perfect you in each of your presentations.

What is the single biggest thing you can do (besides getting structured training in a class)? The answer is easy: demand feedback in real life. The first two or three times it will feel strange, and then it will become, à la Tony Robbins, a new norm, and your improvement will never stop. Some people would be embarrassed to tell colleagues that they read a book or went to a training, but if you flip that, you make it a strength. "Guys, I have been working on some communication skills, and I need your help. After each meeting, is it okay if I grab a minute with one of you? All I will ask is what you thought worked well and what could have been better." That statement flips the group from one whose mirror neurons pull you back into the old box to one that catapults you to a whole new level!

We have gone through this together, you and I, but we are not alone. The whole Own the Room community wants to hear how your latest presentation went. Post a note or photo or both on our Facebook page or follow me on Twitter at @billhoogterp. Visit www.owntheroom.com to access practice drills, watch videos, and learn about training events. You can download your own 30-day plan for even more rapid improvement and check off when you have played the drinking game, done voice modulations in real life, and more.

Public speaking is a metaphor for life. Getting up in front of an audience to deliver a brilliant and successful presentation can seem—like life itself—to be enormously complicated, requiring considerable reserves of talent, courage, personality, skill, and luck. Yet when it is reduced to its purest essence, it is quite simple. Be authentic. Get out of your own way. Connect. Make mistakes. Laugh. Be memorable. Attack life and squeeze it with big love.

Now you are the CEO of your own potential. Invest in yourself and your own growth. You are the brand, and today is your IPO.

Every tool that I have given you is meant to assist you along your own path up the mountain toward greatness. Reach for the three extra centimeters. Give yourself permission to be awesome, because you are.

Go. Be brilliant.