In This Chapter

Leading people effectively using the skill set in your own organisation

Developing leadership habits that create results

G ood business is created by the efforts of a multitude of people all delivering their part to create and deliver the whole. To motivate people, get the best from them, retain them and keep them engaged, leaders need to lead and manage people well. Leaders need to focus the people they’re responsible for on delivering in the business while focusing themselves, their management team and board on both delivering and developing the business. This requires that leaders keep multiple stakeholders on track with the why, what, when and how of the business regularly. Keeping staff (or shareholding family members) aligned with business goals, values and culture is essential for ongoing success.

This chapter helps leaders reflect on their coaching and mentoring skills and provides tips for coaching people in specific circumstances. We invite you to try out some of the tips given in the chapter. Experiment. Create the conditions for those around you to recognise their talents. Work with them to identify the best ways to use those talents for the benefit of the business; then stand back and watch them shine.

The tips in this chapter are useful for

• Leaders coaching their own people (staff or family members in family- owned business)
• Leaders coaching or mentoring colleagues within their organisation
• Leaders who coach or mentor in organisations other than their own

You can find a few simple tips for leaders who coach on co-author Marie’s blog under the resources section here: http://marietayloronline.com/free-tips/

Develop Talent in Those You Lead

Leaders are there to lead, and yet we see so many who want to focus on task delivery. They like the job title and the package, but for too many, the leadership role has been given to them as a promotion to extend their span of control in the business with little thought to the all-important part of leading and developing others.

We’ve worked with leaders who think their role is to handle every issue their people throw their way, to solve every problem and effectively become handling agents. They’ve become patriarchal problem solvers running around being too busy with the issues passed upwards by their team while their people find even more problems. It isn’t surprising that their people get used to passing the problems on the minute the issue falls into the ‘too hard’ box.

If leaders keep taking these problems off their people, over a sustained period they too can end up in a hard box too early. They can burn out and end up lying in a graveyard near you with a headstone that says ‘Busy unto death. Under him the multitudes learned how to pass a problem on’. You can almost see a group of staff sitting in cubicles emailing each other weeks later saying, ‘I sent an email asking her what to say at her memorial but got no response’.

Equally, we’ve watched those who fail to delegate authority, responsibility and tasks properly. They get caught up in a web of confusion when things don’t work out and results aren’t delivered. The web is one they’ve created by their inaction and failure to delegate effectively. And we all know what happens to things that get caught up in a web, don’t we?

Don’t be one of these extremes – particularly not after you’ve read this book. That would just be embarrassing for us and downright careless of you. In our map of the world, developing talent is an integral part of what 21st-century leadership is. Invest in your own skills development and discover how to delegate appropriately and how to coach and mentor others well.

Sell More than Tell

Leadership is about creating effective followers who can contribute and stretch their range of capability. The desire to have all the answers in leading people is an indicator of autocratic leadership, not coaching leadership. Coaching leadership facilitates others to generate solutions to problems and to use their abilities to create solutions to problems that they don’t even know they have yet.

People like to follow leaders who enable them to contribute. How are you challenging people to contribute and add value through your coaching? If you were observing yourself speaking to the people you coach, what would you hear yourself say? What language patterns are you using most of the time?

Notice the difference between

• ‘You need to do A first, then B, then C. That should take around two hours and when those are completed, try F or G. You should have it completed by the end of next week’. (Autocratic style)
• ‘We need to complete these project plan updates by the last Friday of the month from now on. How might you enable the team to deliver on that?’ (Coaching style)

Mind your language when you lead and coach others. If you adopt an autocratic style, notice that you’re doing all the work to generate the solution. When leaders do that, they keep the ownership of the problem. The person on the receiving end is delivering to task and rarely feels fully responsible for delivery of those tasks. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be directive as a leader from time to time; rather, in the coaching context, you want to motivate people to take appropriate responsibility and help them generate workable solutions for themselves, instead of being told what to do wherever possible.

Name the Elephant before Eating It

If you walk around any organisation, whether in the deep dark corridors of the traditional fusty dusty building or the brightest LED up-lit workspaces of cubedom, you can find these strange creatures who spend most of their working day rarely saying what the key problems are. They seem to find difficulty stating what they really want to say or what they really mean. So they dance around and say everything but what they mean. It’s like the issue is in the room but written in invisible neon signage that everyone present is trying not to look at. The leader doesn’t seem to be able to say the unpopular thing, so she dances the Hokey Cokey, sticking legs in and then out but never standing still long enough to say ‘Actually, we need to talk about your dance moves. Your legwork is just awful. You need more practice to be in this chorus line’.

To coach effectively, you need to be prepared to find the elephant in the room and name it clearly. The elephant isn’t going anywhere – it’s bigger and stronger than all of us.

Take co-author Marie, for example. Marie was group coaching with a newly formed leadership team at Pens R Us (not their real name). The team were looking at their three-year vision and were made up of some existing directors and newly appointed directors. There was an ‘atmosphere’, and by coffee she knew, if left unchallenged, the work with the team would be okay but not great; they may have been able to develop a vision, but she doubted their ability to deliver that vision as a team.

After coffee, she started the segment with a single sentence:

‘Why is there an atmosphere in this room, and how do we clear it?’

After an uncomfortable silence, people opened up. There was an unresolved trust issue between two people on the team that seemed to be affecting the whole team of eight. By discussing it, planning for the fears of what could go wrong and looking at how to build trust in the team going forward, it cleared the air. It made things clearer and easier for everyone.

Sometimes, as a leader who coaches, you need to help people clarify and name the problem so you can help them work out how they can resolve it or work around it. Becoming really good at proper naming of a concern and articulating it clearly can help leaders catch a concern before it becomes a baby elephant. Cute as they may be, baby elephants take up a lot of space.

Get Good at Asking Questions

The way you ask questions informs the kind of response you get. You need to use questions in coaching that are appropriate to the type of situation. Leaders in organisations working towards specific outcomes find it particularly useful to frame questions depending on whether they’re generating a process, identifying potential problems or seeking a quick resolution to a problem.

Questions in coaching sit within a context. You have so many ways you can use questions to help others get to an outcome: ask similar questions in different ways to notice what works with the people whom you lead regularly; become aware of what kind of questions open up their thinking and help create a level of clarity that they need. This kind of questioning is about identifying what works and doing more of that.

Notice the difference between these three questions:

• ‘Imagine you could create the perfect solution to a problem you’re leading on. What would be the first step for you?’
• ‘Imagine you could create the worst solution to a problem you’re leading on. What would be the first step? … What will you do instead?’
• ‘Imagine you could create a quick, workable solution to a problem you’re leading on. What would be the first step for your team in the next two hours?’

Play around with your coaching questions a little. Help people move towards an outcome in different ways and pay attention to what works. The ability to ask good questions saves your time and empowers others to think and act.

Speak in Specifics and Minding Your Language

We’ve all done it. We speak in generalities and sometimes drop hints into the conversation in the hope that someone will get the message or understand what we’re really trying to say without us having to say it clearly. When we coach within an organisation, we have this habit too. We can fall into the trap of buying into our coachee’s generalisations. This mistake can happen because we have a shared experience or a shared set of assumptions, a kind of organisational shorthand. Sometimes this shorthand is just fine – but not if the collective assumptions need to be challenged.

Assumptions in business can result from a lack of clarity. When people don’t speak up, those assumptions begin to sound like facts that everyone uses to justify behaviour. This situation can create organisational risk, myths and misunderstanding. When coaching as a leader, you are sometimes the one who needs to question assumptions and challenge generalisations.

In this area, it can be really helpful to challenge your own generalisations before speaking; get specific and challenge your coachee to do the same.

For example, there is a world of difference between

Option 1. Leader: ‘The debt recovery team are useless at chasing customers up, and that delays our bonus payments. We need to rectify this. What ideas do you have?’

Staff member: ‘I know, they’re useless. I can go and talk to Fred and see if he can get them to be more efficient on that in future. We can try and see if that shifts them. I can do that on Wednesday’.

Notice how a generalised statement and call to action creates what sounds like a solution. Also, how the generalisation can invite collusion with the status quo.

Option 2. Leader who coaches: ‘Some of our debts don’t seem to be recovered as efficiently as others, and this seems to have created a knock on problem with the bonus payments for the sales team in February. It isn’t the first time it has happened. We need to rectify that. What thoughts do you have?’

Staff member: ‘I know, they’re useless. I can go and talk to Fred and see if he can get them to be more efficient on that in future. We can try and see if that shifts them. I can do that on Wednesday’.

Leader who coaches: ‘I didn’t say they were useless, but that they contributed to the sales team not receiving their bonus. What I’m looking for are ideas on how you might help the situation improve’.

Staff member: ‘Oh. Well, I guess I can sit down with Fred to work back and see what happened in February. I can look at whether it’s a problem with the chasing of debt or something else’.

Leader who coaches: ‘What could the “something else” be?’

Staff member: ‘Well, now that I think about it, I guess part of the problem may be timing. I can check what dates the sales team are passing on customer details to debt recovery for chasing’.

Leader who coaches: ‘Anything else?’

Staff member: ‘As it only happens some months, I wonder if anything is happening in those months or in the preceding month that causes the problem and whether the sales team are contributing to that …’

You get the picture. By coaching and setting aside the assumptions and generalisations, you can help people generate specific thoughts and ideas that may actually address the problem.

Recognise the Value of Slowing Down or Shutting Up

Sometimes when people coach, they do too much talking. They may do so because they love the sound of their own voice, they have lots of ideas that they can’t sit on or they simply feel uncomfortable with the silence in a conversation. When coaches are doing most of the talking, they’re normally doing most of the work in the coaching conversation too. If this happens, they can start directing rather than leading or can end up generating solutions that the member of staff then doesn’t recognise as her own. When the coachee hasn’t generated the solution, it can be more difficult for her to implement it.

Noticing this situation happening is the first step to get the conversation back on track by either slowing down your pace of speech or using silence as ways to help others think.

People tend to think more deeply when they slow down the pace a little. In coaching, you’re looking to create the conditions to allow others to generate thoughtful, workable ideas and solutions rather than rapid-fire answers. Consider how you may make room for those you lead to generate their own solutions by simply slowing down the conversation. If you find doing so difficult, a simple technique is to practise speaking out loud by reading at a storytelling pace.

Being quiet and getting comfortable with silence can also help. The silence inevitably seems longer for the coach than the coachee. The person being coached is generating ideas and using the space the coach creates to solve the issue she is faced with. Get comfortable with the silence and, if it helps, tell the coachee that you’re going to stop talking quite so much and leave a bit of silence from time to time in the conversation to allow room for her grey matter to get to work.

Try it and see what results you get.

Appreciate Differences to Be a Difference Maker

Globalisation and virtual workplaces are changing the role of leadership. Equally as we become more geographically mobile, managing people of different cultures in single location business is becoming increasingly important too. Cross-cultural coaching can be difficult for those who have limited experienced of cultural diversity.

We need to understand how cultural differences manifest themselves because they can present entirely different philosophies of life, of work and worldviews. With that comes a range of different values, assumptions and beliefs. To coach people effectively, you need to understand some of these differences and how you can respect those in the coaching process.

Ask people of a different culture what works for them in the coaching process and what they find useful, particularly if they’ve been coached previously within their own culture. Even basic manners and communication methods can be different from culture to culture. Being sensitive to these differences is important in terms of gaining and maintaining rapport with a coachee. You may need to switch out of your own cultural norms to serve your member of staff well. Knowing when to take the lead a little from the coachee is important. If you’re male, shaking the hand of a Muslim woman may not be acceptable, for example. You need to become familiar with cultural norms and actively engage your staff in the conversation about what works for them.

Do you know what the cultural expectations are of work from the people you lead? What are the range of culturally specific celebrations and festivals in your team? How can you acknowledge those or take account of them in the coaching process? For example, if someone is fasting for a period of time, you may need to consider changing the timing of coaching conversations from afternoon to morning when the person may be less tired. Coaches need to be adaptive and flexible.

Create the Optimum Conditions to Coach at a Distance

When you coach people at different locations, you need to consider a few obvious things such as taking account of time differences and organising meeting times when both you and the coachee have the energy to coach and be coached. We both coach internationally and have had that experience of speaking to a client at midnight after a full day’s work. Although we have techniques we can use to recharge our energy, in truth late-night calls are never a good idea. Reorganising your day to have a late start and learning the art of the ten-minute power nap are good habits to develop if working across different time zones.

When you have coaching conversations at a distance, it’s a good idea to re-create the conditions of a face-to-face meeting as far as possible. The following checklist may help. The checklist is intended for use by the coach, and you can use it as preparation guidance for the coachee too.

Support Your People during Change

When you’re leading and coaching people through a change programme, remember that people can find change a challenge. If staff cannot recognise or articulate feelings of shock, anger and melancholy that can manifest during change, this challenge can be even greater for them.

Individual and team performance may suffer, and staff can feel deskilled and sometimes may find it difficult to transition to new ways of working.

The best thing leaders who coach can do during change is to:

• Encourage people to keep talking about the change and the process of change even if you feel you’ve heard their feedback ten times before.
• Acknowledge people regularly and be as specific as you can about what they are contributing, what you value about them and what you would like them to contribute in the next month, week or day!
• Be prepared to feel a bit stupid sometimes. You may not have the answers to their questions and may not have even thought of some of the questions that pop up. It’s okay to say, ‘I don’t know, I will need to come back to you’.
• Be honest when you do know but are not able to share information. This can become an art form when coaching people during change. Most of the time, the best policy is to tell people that ‘decisions are being taken that are not for sharing beyond the senior team at the moment’ (if they are) rather than a blanket ‘I don’t know’.
• Help people to see their strengths and capabilities by giving lots of feedback and encouraging the coachee to review her own work and highlight her strengths. It can be a great idea to coach people to recognise and ‘sell’ her strengths during change, particularly if she may need to apply for a new role.

To help her, try working with these types of coaching questions:

• How are you experiencing the change process?
• On a scale of 1 to 10, how motivated are you to deliver what you need to get done this week? What would help to move you one or two points up the scale?
• If our team were to be just 10 per cent more effective in the next two to four weeks, what would you suggest we do? What would you have me do? What would you do?
• I can hear you’re angry about the changes and the impact on your colleagues. What could I do more of to support you during this time?
• What do you absolutely need to deliver in the next week? What would you like to deliver if we can find another way of doing things by the end of this conversation?
• As a team, let’s go around the room and on a scale of 1 to 10 indicate how informed you feel you are about the change impact on this team. Where are you on the scale in relation to your understanding of the organisational change as a whole?
• If I were to ask all of your internal and external customers what you have delivered and how you have delivered in the last three months, what positive things would I hear?
• What one thing would help to make the change process easier for you in the next four to eight weeks?

Educate Yourself about the Business

When leaders coach and mentor inside organisations, you need to know the business: to know more than they do about the vision for the business, the values it holds dear and what can help them succeed within it. Leaders need to be honest, but you can only say ‘I don’t know’ so many times before your credibility as a leader is affected. The questions your people ask in coaching conversations and the issues they raise that you don’t understand can provide some indicators of where your own knowledge gaps are.

We don’t take the view that leaders need to know everything their people know, rather that you need an overview of the business and where the work your people are delivering fits longer term. You need to understand business terminology and the roles people play in making the business successful in order to be a great coach too. These can be divided into three areas:

• People factors: Being able to explain the role of the Board, the Executive Leadership, the different functions in the business and its customers. Being able to describe the relationships between key players in the organisation, any organisational politics and accepted ways of operating in the business.
• Business process factors: Knowing how to interpret the annual report, understanding key operational policy, knowing key milestone dates and deadlines. The rhythm of the business such as budget deadlines, Board paper deadlines, regular communications to read, any social calendar and the like.
• Industry and market factors: Understanding the business externally to help your people widen their perspective and knowledge base during their career. Sharing your knowledge of relevant professional networks and associations, or helping your coachee/mentee navigate her way through the key publications to read or understanding who the movers and shakers are in your industry.

This understanding is essential if you’re helping your people develop their careers, and we believe that one role of leaders is to do that. Not that you would simply impart information to your staff like the career equivalent of a tourist information office. In a coaching or mentoring session, you want to encourage a degree of self-discovery and personal research. To do that, you need an informed internal and external view to help people know if they’re heading in the right direction.

A good way for leaders who coach to consider this issue is for you to draw two mind maps and stakeholder maps. One shows your internal knowledge in the areas of people, policy, processes, vision and plans. The other shows your external relationships and knowledge in your industry, customer groups and professional expertise. These two maps can help you spot your own gaps and sometimes your own areas for development as a coach, a leader or professional. Possibly, you may identify areas where you may seek coaching or mentoring support yourself.