Index

Adams, Scott, 26, 302303, 351

Ambiguity, 4445, 5960, 72, 85

of silence, 6566, 98

Appreciation, 121, 194198, 200

of self, 197

Assumptions, 15, 21, 35, 44, 50, 56, 57, 67, 68, 71, 82, 98, 111, 123, 136, 140, 143, 187, 228, 251, 271, 288, 289, 327, 334, 336, 344, 348

Attention, 64, 86, 159, 164, 165166, 171, 192, 257, 262, 264267, 330

gaining, 2225, 28, 3132, 34n., 36, 145, 149, 212

paying, 9, 13, 20, 21, 76, 82, 96, 103, 109, 145, 186, 213, 215216, 225, 229, 275276, 294, 346

personalized, 186, 201206, 225

Attitude, 13, 35, 3740, 48, 68, 162, 163, 166, 175176, 188, 268, 297, 328, 341

impact of, 37, 40, 225, 227

toward complaints, 251

Barlow, Janelle, 166, 251, 351

Behavior patterns, 96, 99

Benesh, Marie, 29, 215n., 351, 355

Blackburn, George, 174175

Black Hole, 232233, 235

Blame, 6, 27, 38, 90, 96, 97, 100, 110, 121, 131, 208, 209, 251, 293, 315, 316

Bohjalian, Chris, 85, 351

Bridges, William, 303, 306, 309, 322, 332, 351

Bridges change model, 345

Broude, Craig, 333, 337, 352

Bullock, James, 29n., 351, 355

Buy-in, 136, 270, 296, 297

Change, 12, 22, 31, 37 152–53, 173, 175, 179, 243, 244, 267, 299ff., 323ff.

artist, 320321, 323, 329

communication during, 300, 302, 303, 310, 316, 319321, 323ff.

experience of, 302ff.

introducing, 4, 12, 20, 302, 307

making, 9, 13

managing, 12, 153, 301, 303, 322, 323, 335, 345

meta-change, 320322

of opinion, 42, 176, 181182

reactions to, 64, 148, 157, 302, 305ff., 312313, 316, 325ff., 333, 341342

resistance to, 6465, 183, 304, 312, 316, 336, 342

to service, 25, 114, 255, 269271, 273, 275, 278279, 292293

Chaos, 196, 261, 322

Clarifying questions, 13, 15, 6972, 9495, 127

Commenting, rules for, 8892, 97, 99, 101, 127, 205, 234, 244

Communication, 5ff., 18, 21ff., 51ff., 65, 6872, 7477, 97, 103105, 107, 111ff., 135ff., 176, 183ff., 191192, 197, 200, 201, 207, 211, 215218, 219221, 222ff., 235, 238239, 246248, 255, 265266, 274275, 277ff., 289, 291, 294295, 296

assessment, 4748, 201

of caring, 222ff.

channel, 29, 210211

communicating about, 57, 70, 120, 143

congruent, 7, 16, 87, 143

differences in, 135ff.

distortion of, 8384, 218

face-to-face, 29, 96, 111, 132134, 258259, 269, 284, 293, 336

glitches, 5, 8

improving, 8, 30, 39, 67, 72, 277, 283, 295

inadequate, 304306

incongruent, 16, 88

metrics for, 208211, 217

patterns, 192, 317, 318, 320

preferences, 15, 105, 135ff., 182, 221, 295

process, 192, 221, 251, 279, 281, 283

skills, 67

strategies, 11, 47

styles, 11, 15, 135138, 143, 146, 159, 192, 210, 295

Communication gaps, 3ff., 1819, 63, 103, 131, 162, 220, 223, 246, 347, 350

during change, 12, 299ff.

eliminating, 3, 9, 137, 162, 165, 230, 278, 347, 349

in everyday interactions, 10, 17ff.

evidence of, 45

four contexts of, 1012

prevalence of, 7

preventing, 120, 137

in relationships, 11, 78, 103ff.

responsibility for, 9, 21, 26, 2728

service-related, 12, 219ff.

Compassionate listeners, 215217

Complaints, 5, 56, 6162, 185187, 191192, 199, 203, 214, 229, 247, 249, 250252, 255, 256, 264, 265267, 276, 291, 334

addressing, 186187, 191192, 199, 203, 264

validity of, 186

Compromise, 179, 189, 288, 330

Conflict, 11, 15, 50, 60, 107108, 109, 111, 131, 133, 140, 141, 172, 187, 188, 208209, 213, 216

resolution of, 187189, 210211, 277, 279, 290, 295

Consultants, 218, 256, 314, 334

Coping mechanisms, 8892, 97, 99, 101

Corporate fool, 217218

Cultural differences, 5153, 65, 284

Customer dissatisfaction, 165166, 229ff., 274275

Customer feedback, 250ff., 272274

Customer satisfaction, 4, 12, 14, 114, 166, 219, 221, 223228, 234, 256259, 265, 267, 269, 274, 291, 294

changes in, 224, 248, 258, 269

failure to achieve, 12

surveys of, 4, 56, 229, 250, 252253, 258259, 262268, 272276, 294, 297

de Bono, Edward, 16, 352

DeFleur, Melvin L., 51, 352

DeKoven, Bernie, 116117

Dentist example, 103105

Derby, Esther, 216n., 263

Dörner, Dietrich, 344, 352

Doublespeak, 5051, 55

Effectiveness, personal, 13, 3637, 347

Elgin, Suzette Haden, 47n., 352

E-mail, 5, 7, 15, 21, 2223, 29, 3031, 3233, 38, 75, 76, 97, 100, 132, 142, 146, 148, 191192, 193, 210211, 237, 240241, 265, 271, 293, 334, 336, 350

Emery, Dale, 6465, 342

Empathy, 174177, 186, 323, 338340, 346

Empathy Suit, 174175, 189

English-to-English dictionary, 5255

Expectations, managing, 111, 123126, 271, 278

of process, 224225, 227228, 245

of product, 224

of service, 269

Farrell, Kathy, 333, 337, 352

Farson, Richard, 37, 38n., 352

Feedback, 5, 12, 15, 39, 4546, 63, 70, 108, 141, 151, 192, 200, 213214, 216, 217, 222, 247, 250ff., 282, 291, 294296, 298, 330, 333334

gathering, 252258, 268272

loop, 3031

responding to, 272273

Feelings, 8791, 99, 101

Firth, David, 217218, 352

Fisher, Roger, 173174, 352

Freiberg, Kevin, and Jackie Freiberg, 231, 352

Gapologist, 12, 16, 19, 347ff.

Gaps. See Communication gaps.

Gerson, Richard R., 252, 353

Gilovich, Thomas, 23, 83, 85, 353

Gladwell, Malcolm, 22, 342, 353

Gottesdiener, Ellen, 132, 353

Hay, David C., 56, 353

Hirsh, Sandra Krebs, 147, 353

Hofstadter’s Law, 328

Honesty, 241244, 245

How information, 337

Humor, 34

in review sessions, 122

Information-sharing, 4648, 198199, 335338

Interaction model, 77ff., 87, 92ff., 167, 216, 264

feelings and, 7781, 8792, 99, 100101

intake and, 77, 7981, 8285, 9091, 94, 95, 99, 100101

response and, 7781, 9091, 9398, 99, 101

uses of, 92ff.

Interactions, 73ff., 109, 168, 185, 213, 260

Interpretations, 77, 7981, 8587 90–91, 95, 99, 100101, 165, 214

alternative, 65, 95, 342

differences in, 5152, 55, 5961, 66, 69, 72, 278, 295

generous, 1516, 233234, 342

multiple, 65, 87, 92, 167170

as traps, 58

Interviews, 229, 255256, 258262, 264265, 268, 270, 291, 294, 344

Inverted Pyramid, 3233

Involvement, 6364

Jankowski, Mark A., 85, 354

Jargon, 26, 55

Jung, Carl, 138, 150, 353

Karten, Naomi, 55, 130, 176, 208, 288, 316, 350, 353, 354, 355

Kearney, Patricia, 51, 352

Kerth, Norman, 122, 176, 353

King, Bob, 130, 208209, 353

Kroeger, Otto, 157, 353

Kübler-Ross, Elisabeth, 310, 316, 343, 353

Kummerow, Jean, 147, 353

Labels, 163166, 341342

Lag, perceptual, 273274

Language, 5053, 6263, 65

Laughter, 111, 116118, 126, 215

Lawrence, Gordon, 151, 353

Leigh, Alan, 217, 352

Listening, 185, 203, 258, 281, 323, 334

Logic, 150154

Logic-bubbles, 167, 171172, 175, 178, 181

London Underground, 3, 9, 16

Lurie, Alison, 24, 353

Lutz, William, 50, 51n., 54, 353

McLenden, Jean, 101n., 120

Message filters, 8485

Messages, 5, 78, 15, 21ff., 77ff., 185, 191, 215, 247, 270, 271, 334

befuddling, 17ff., 22, 4446

cluttered, 22, 3135

communication of, 2426

conflicting, 22, 4344

hidden, 22, 3537

missed, 22, 2831

misstated, 22, 2628

nonverbal, 74, 76, 87, 96, 142, 226

off-putting, 22, 3740

one-sided, 22, 4041

presentation of, 3940

recipient of, 11, 73ff., 80, 82, 315

resending, 2830

responses to, puzzling, 11, 15, 93

responsibility for, 20

telephone, 17, 19, 38

unclear, 1718

unexplained, 22, 4344

unnoticed, 2226

visual, 34

Miscommunication, 5, 6, 10, 15, 1819, 50, 65, 72, 213

avoiding, 87, 184

Misinterpretation, 6, 8, 10, 4546, 49ff., 73ff., 85, 94, 96, 100, 210, 213214, 258, 328

avoiding, 13, 54, 60, 6971, 188, 210, 237

Misunderstandings, 6, 10, 54, 59, 62, 63, 68, 9495, 125, 131, 186, 188, 214, 242, 267

preventing, 6872, 111, 297

Møller, Claus, 166, 251, 351

Murray, William D.G., 140, 354

Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), 136ff., 325

extraversion preference, 137ff., 157, 159, 210

feeling preference, 137, 150154, 157, 159

introversion preference, 137ff., 157, 159, 210

intuition preference, 137, 144150, 326

judging preference, 137, 154159, 325

perceiving preference, 137, 154159, 325

sensing preference, 137, 144150, 326

thinking preference, 137, 150154, 157, 159

Nielsen, Jerri, 210211, 354

Norman, Donald A., 8, 7576, 82, 354

Norms, 14, 105, 111, 120123, 214

Northcutt, Wendy, 231, 354

Observers, 192, 212215, 218

One-way agreements, 286287

Operational level agreement, 282283

Organizational effectiveness, 1314, 347

Oshry, Barry, 74, 354

Past experience, 326327

Patience, 182

Perception, 163164, 273274

Perspective, 30, 57, 58, 105, 123, 131, 146, 160ff., 185186, 192, 208, 218, 281, 327, 332, 334

empathetic, 10, 12, 4041, 45, 105, 152, 172, 174175, 178, 181, 183, 187, 189, 216, 252, 254, 270, 281

Perspectoscope, 11, 162163, 164, 177, 181, 189190

Persuasion, 178180

Plax, Timothy G., 51, 352

Rapport, 118119

Recognition, public, 194

Relationship-building, 7, 1112, 14, 105, 106ff., 134, 136137, 159, 184, 203, 255, 264, 269, 281282, 283, 293, 297

communication in, 14, 103, 105, 114, 293

meetings and, 132134

Relationships, 1112, 54, 62, 82, 87, 103, 105, 106ff., 157, 168, 191ff., 224225, 228, 231, 244, 251, 277, 283, 293, 329. See also Communication gaps; Relationship-building.

communication in, 5, 54, 104, 124, 143

courtesies, 192ff.

improving, 9697, 106, 117, 131, 170171, 196, 281282, 298

win-win, 106, 178, 221, 278

Response-escalation procedures, 266267

Retrospectives, personal, 182183

Reviews,

periodic, 279, 288, 290, 292293

post-project, 122, 200

Richardson, John, 173, 352

Risk, 33, 332

minimizing, 25

Satir, Virginia, 16, 68, 77, 87, 88n., 112, 120, 135, 164165, 197, 198n., 199, 208, 310, 354

Satir Change Model, 310ff., 323, 324, 329, 332, 339, 340, 345

Chaos, 312ff., 324325, 326, 328332, 334, 337, 338, 345

Foreign Element, 312316, 318, 319322, 324325, 327330, 344, 345346

New Status Quo, 318, 319322, 328, 331, 340

Old Status Quo, 311312, 315, 316, 319322, 323, 329, 330, 335

Practice and Integration, 318322, 340

Transforming Idea, 318322, 337, 345

Schmaltz, David A., 86, 126, 354

Seeking clarification, 56, 58, 93, 187188, 215216

Service, 237238, 246, 269, 282, 288290, 297

context-setting information, 288289

delivery, 297

description, 288, 289

elements, 288290

expectations, 269

goal, 246

standards, 237238, 282, 288, 289290

Service level agreement (SLA), 12, 36, 60, 221, 238, 277ff., 330, 341

change process, 290, 293

as a communication tool, 281

management elements, 288, 290293

periodic review, 290, 292293

service reporting, 290, 291292

service tracking, 290291, 292

success factors, 278297

Shapiro, Ronald M., 85, 354

Sharp, Alan, 173174, 352

Silence, 141142, 144, 185

ambiguity of, 6566, 98

Skiing example, 49, 287, 299

Smiling, 226, 227

Smith, Rolf, 309, 354

Smith, Steven M., 316, 354

Standards, product, 30, 40, 42

Starcevich, Matt M., 311312, 354

Stowell, Steven J., 311312, 354

Stress, 204205, 317, 339

Strider, Eileen, 215n., 216n. Strider, Wayne, 68, 260, 355

Subway example, 16

Surveys of customer satisfaction, 4, 56, 229, 250, 252253, 258259, 262268, 272276, 294, 297

Team jiggler, 215n., 217, 218

Temperature reading, 197201, 208

Terminology, 10, 11, 50, 53ff., 101, 121, 259, 295, 309, 345

business, 6162

disconnects, 53ff.

everyday, 6267

interpreter of, 63

meeting, 5758

project, 5557

service, 5860

Thanks, giving, 192ff., 206

Then and there reaction, 81, 88, 93

They Syndrome, 8

Thuesen, Janet M., 157n., 353

Timing, 179, 323, 324325

To-do list, 156, 157, 282

Tone, 95, 171, 227

Trust, 7, 39, 43, 103, 105, 107, 109, 110, 112, 116, 132, 158, 170, 216, 231, 235, 271, 277278, 294, 326, 338, 346

distrust and, 57, 78, 79, 90, 168169, 243244, 246, 275, 304, 338, 343

Truthful disclosure, 242

Underhill, Paco, 23, 355

Understanding, 126129, 132

Universal grievances, 229ff., 241

Updates, providing, 235236, 239241

Venting, 332

Visibility ratio, 130, 208

Vollers, Maryanne, 211n., 354

Weinberg, Jerry, 29n., 32, 61n., 88, 117, 166n., 332, 335, 351, 355

What information, 337

What’s in it for me (WIIFM), 178179

Whiteley, Richard C., 225, 355

Why information, 337

Word-action contradiction, 4344, 205, 206, 222233, 246248

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