FEATURES SECRET ROOM
The $100 Secret Room
Rule number one of having a secret room: don’t tell people you have a secret room.
But this is too good not to share, so I guess I’ll just leave off my real name so that it’s still somewhat secret.
The lady who manages my rental told me that I could do whatever I wanted to the place as long as it was an improvement. While “improvement” can be subjective, who wouldn’t want a secret room? (I sometimes imagine my departing argument, where I dare her to post the place on Craigslist, mentioning the secret room, and see how fast it gets rented.) Okay, on to the how and why.
As you can see, the dining room has a door leading to a small office (or whatever else a 10’×10’ room can be used for). The doorway is quite wide, and I venture to guess that originally there was no door. As with a lot of the past “improvements” here, someone added a door and covered the remaining space with a pseudo-wall. This had always bothered me, especially because once you enter the room, the light switch is found behind the door. It would be a pain to change the hinges on the door or relocate the light switch, so I opted for a win-win idea.
Just like any kid, I always wanted a secret room. I thought about it for a long time and it became clear that this room was perfect for it, but it had to be done right. Everyone seems to think of the bookcase door first, but this wall just wasn’t right for that. Real construction and investment would be required to make that work. Besides the weight factor, I didn’t want to have to find things to fill a bookcase, so I went simple and cheap.
The advantages of my simple design are that it makes up for any of the guaranteed inaccuracies in my workmanship and still leaves the door mostly undetectable. (It’s also worth mentioning that the walls aren’t entirely plumb and the roof is slanted for drainage.)
After removing the door and bad patch job, I had to do some simple framing in the doorway. I then opted for simply skinning the wall with 1/8" lauan plywood. The idea was that I would take advantage of the fact that the area is 10’ long by 8’ high, for the most part. By making a grid of 2’×2’ panels with 1"×3" wood planks, I would accomplish four things:
» Create uniformity that would throw off an observer to the idea that there is a door present.
» Allow the door to overlap the inside of the planked frame to hide the edges.
» Allow for a door measuring 2’×4’, which
I felt was ideal for the project.
» And again, allow for the trapezoidal wall and inaccurate cuts on my part.
I knew that even if it didn’t really work out to be awesomesauce, it would improve the look of the wall.
To make it seem more like a design element, I decided to stain the planks slightly darker than the panels. After skinning the wall, I stained it as well as the door panel. The difficult part was having to pre-cut and number all the 1"×3" planks, then stain them separately so as to not get any dark stain on the lighter panels. To be fair, the stain took the budget just over $100, but it was damn close.
Once all the planks were in place, I fitted the door with hinges and a door-closer I found at Habitat for Humanity on the cheap. It didn’t have an arm, so I just made one out of scrap metal stock I had lying around the garage.
Satisfied with the project, I left the backside unfinished. Once you’re inside, it really gives it that secret room feel. Besides, I might have to do some deconstruction to get some of my items out of this room when I move. I knew this might be a problem from the beginning, but decided it would be worth it. I finished it off with a framed photo of a duck as a friendly reminder to not bump your head on the way out.
I’m ready for the zombies, are you? 
“CT” ([email protected]) is a freelance Steadicam operator who also tinkers in the garage doing amateur welding, woodworking, aluminum brazing, Vespa restoration, artwork, and the occasional hydrogen fuel cell experiment.