Context and environment influence body language in ways both obvious and subtle. Some are due to social norms, some are due to life experience, and some are due to individual personality and selfesteem. There are generational differences, gender differences, and cultural differences, as well.

It really all comes down to perceptions. How do you perceive the context and environment where you are right now? If you're at home you're probably dressed casually, maybe drinking a soda or a cup of coffee, and there might be music, TV, or other people making noise in the background. You may or may not be taking notes as you read, and if you are, it's probably notes in the margin of the book.

If you're in the office, however, you're probably dressed in business clothes, sitting at a desk or meeting room table, and hearing the typical background noises of the office environment. You may even have a file folder set aside where you keep copies of your worksheets, takeaways, and any notes you've taken while reading.

Why the differences? It has to do in part with your perceptions of the context and environment in which you're operating. Some of the common categories of perceptions include:

How you perceive each of these things (and how others around you perceive each of these things) is a driving force behind the appropriateness and meaning of your body language.

Formality

The perception of formality or informality is one that can vary greatly depending on your life experiences and social environment. The people, the activity, the physical objects, and social expectations all influence your perception of formality. For instance, your weekly staff meeting may have a certain level of formality, but what happens when the division manager or member of the executive team is scheduled to attend? The meeting takes on a higher level of formality because of the higher status of a person who will attend.

Restaurants are another great example of how perceptions of formality and informality are created. What do you find in a typical fast-food place? Self-service, tables and chairs attached to the floor, paper napkins, and a central area for condiments and drinks. All of these things create an informal atmosphere that is accepted and understood. Now, what do you find in a higher end restaurant? Hostess seating, tablecloths, wait staff to serve you, and everything you need brought right to your table. These things contribute to a more formal atmosphere that, again, is accepted and understood.

So what is the effect of all this on body language and nonverbal communication? In general, the more formality you perceive the less relaxed your body language will be. Your nonverbal behaviors will be more conservative and controlled to fit in with accepted expectations for the understood level of formality. You may feel hesitant about showing your true thoughts during a conversation, so you make a deliberate effort to keep your facial expression and posture neutral.

Privacy

The perception of privacy is an indicator of how likely you think it is you'll be overheard or seen by someone else. It is influenced by the size of the space where you are, whether it is fully enclosed, how many other people are nearby, and how easy it is for others to see you in that space.

For example, when you go to see your doctor the examination room is fully enclosed and access to the room is limited. The perception is one of great privacy. The same is true of being in an office with a door, your home, and the like. Your visibility to others is also an important factor in the perception of privacy. Imagine carrying on a heated discussion in a room with glass walls where everyone outside can see inside. How does it feel? Now imagine the same discussion in a room with no windows and the door closed. Any difference? I imagine so.

The perception of privacy affects how intimately you will interact with others. In general, the more privacy you perceive the more comfortable you will feel sharing personal messages, thoughts, and information. You will tend to sit closer to the other person(s) and lean in. The greater the privacy the safer it feels for you to let go and allow your body language to reflect what's truly on your mind.

Familiarity

The perception of familiarity affects how you interact with people and the environment and is based on how new or different you perceive a situation to be. For example, when you meet a new person you automatically go into a more formal, conservative body language mode. You don't know the person yet so your nonverbal behavior signals something along the lines of, "I need to learn more about you before I can relax."

Think about the first time you drove a car, started a new job, tried a new sport, or the like. Your perception of familiarity was likely very low so your body language reflected a great deal of caution and deliberation. Now think about those same things after you had done them for a few weeks. Your perception of familiarity had grown so your nonverbal behaviors reflected less caution and more comfort.

Retail stores know all about the perception of familiarity and make deliberate attempts to influence yours. Large chain stores such as Target, Wal-Mart, Shopko, an so on, typically build almost all of their stores with the same or similar floor plan. Why? So no matter where you go, when you walk into one of their stores you will find it familiar and comfortable. This helps entice you to make more purchases.

The perception of familiarity affects how openly and honestly you will interact with others. In general, the more familiarity you perceive, the more willing you are to allow your body language to relax. You walk more confidently, your tone of voice is calmer and stronger, and you can do whatever you came to do without exploring the environment first.

Warmth

The perception of warmth is based on psychological factors rather than physical comfort factors. The warmth of a particular place or area is affected by colors, textures, physical objects, and the like. For instance, walking into the hardware store you perceive much less warmth than you do walking into a furniture store. The furniture store uses softer colors, displays wonderfully textured items, and is filled with a sense of comfort.

Here's another example. Think about your local espresso coffee shop and the decor inside. It probably features muted colors and a collection of chairs and sofas, all of which create a greater perception of warmth. And that greater warmth is what entices you to stay a little longer, linger a bit, and spend more money.

The perception of warmth is closely related to familiarity, but you do not always have to be familiar with an environment to perceive its warmth. That warmth will encourage you to show more relaxed body language, such as an open body position when sitting or standing, conversations held while standing or sitting closer together, and generally relaxed nonverbal behaviors.

Distance

The perception of distance is based on both physical distances and psychological distances. It is possible for you to feel physically close and psychologically distant at the same time, and the reverse is true as well.

For instance, let's say you are riding on a crowded transit bus, surrounded by people you don't know. The physical distances are rather close but psychologically you feel distant because you are among strangers. You can't make changes to the physical circumstances, but you can make changes to your body language as a way to deal with the psychological circumstances. You might choose to make as little eye contact as possible, remain very still, and stay silent. Sometimes, though, the opposite happens and you might laugh nervously, comment to the people around you about the close quarters, and the like.

The perception of distance affects how you interpret a situation and the kinds of nonverbal behaviors you exhibit. When physical and psychological distances are perceived as equal to each other your body language will typically match appropriately: relaxed and open when distance is small, reserved and more formal when distance is large. When the two aspects are in conflict, however—such as in the transit bus example—your resulting body language may be somewhat conflicting or unpredictable as well.

Constraint

The perception of constraint relates to how you perceive your ability to leave a particular situation. The more constrained you feel, the more out of control you feel, and the more reserved your body language will be. For instance, let's say you are attending a workshop or seminar required by your employer. Regardless of the size of the room you are in, you will feel constrained in that situation because you know you are not free to leave.

Contrast that with what happens when you walk into a restaurant. If it is crowded and the wait time is very long, you don't have to stay there. You can leave and go somewhere else. Your body language will tend to be more relaxed and comfortable because you feel free to make your own choice, not have your choice made for you.

The perception of constraint can vary in its severity and duration. Let's say you're a college student who lives in the dorm. Spring break comes along and it's time to go back home for a week. Chances are you perceive (accurately, most likely) greater constraints in that environment than you do back at school. Because it's only for a week, though, you (and your parents) just deal with it. What happens, though, when it's summer break and you move back home for two or three months? The perceived restraints might not be so tolerable for that length of time, and, if not addressed, your body language and nonverbal behaviors will quickly start to reveal your true inner feeling.

Time

The perception of time can take many different forms. You might be up against a tight deadline, and the perception of a short time frame leads to tense body language and nonverbal behaviors. Or, you might be scheduled to meet someone at a specific time but that person is late, so your body language might reflect irritation or even lack of respect for someone who can't get places on time.

Let's say you are driving somewhere with a group of people you don't know very well. Even if you'll only be in the car together for an hour or so, you might perceive that length of time as quite negative. Your nonverbal behaviors are likely to be reserved, especially given the close quarters and lack of familiarity with the other people. What would happen to your perception if, once the drive got under way, you found you really like the other people, and there is a strong connection among you? Chances are the time spent in the car will suddenly not seem so negative and may even seem to pass by more quickly.

The perception of time influences body language in terms of how you approach lengths of time as well as how you interpret others' use of time. Culture plays a strong role in time perceptions as well. In the United States, people are driven to be on time and pack as much into every day as possible. In Brazil, however, time is viewed more as a guideline than a hard-and-fast rule. The more relaxed approach to time is reflected in Brazilians' more relaxed body language and nonverbal behaviors.

Other People

The perception of other people is related to the perceptions of privacy and familiarity. When other people are around, you automatically make a judgment about how active or passive those people are in the environment.

Are those other people active participants in the conversation? Are they close enough to overhear the conversation? If you perceive others as actively involved then your body language will adapt accordingly. You may make eye contact with more people, address your message to more people, and generally practice more conservative body language.

If, however, you perceive others as not actively involved, then your body language will reflect that as well. You might turn your back to others, avoid eye contact, or simply not include them in the conversation. However, your perception of other people is not necessarily related to their physical distance from you. Think about the last time you were riding in a cab. The driver is physically very close but you may perceive that person as a passive participant and avoid eye contact, sit in silence, or otherwise send the nonverbal message that you don't wish to interact.

The perception of other people affects body language by creating situations where you might be more reserved or formal if you do not know the others. If you know the other people well, though, your nonverbal behaviors will reflect that familiarity and level of comfort.

Physical Environment

The perception of physical environment is related to the perception of warmth, privacy, and distance. It is different, though, in that this perception is strongly affected by physical placement of items, lighting, sounds, and even building architecture. These factors (and others) interact to influence your perception of the physical environment around you.

For instance, if you walk into a room where the furniture is laid out in rows, all facing the same direction, your nonverbal behaviors will likely become more formal and reserved because the environment is more formal and structured. If, however, you walk into a room where the furniture is arranged in small clusters with comfortable chairs, your nonverbal behaviors will likely relax because the environment is more intimate and personal.

Building architecture has a lot to do with perceptions of physical environment as well. When a building is designed with communal areas, wide hallways, and traffic flow that brings people together, the physical environment may be large but still perceived as friendly and comfortable. Modern architectural design considers these issues; to see for yourself, take a walk through an older building and a walk through a newer building. You will likely notice many differences and your perceptions will likely be different as well.

Depending on the context and environment, the same body language can have vastly different meanings. This may occur if you are in an unfamiliar environment where you don't know the expectations or it can occur if the people around you view the situation in a different context than you do. Cultural differences, gender differences, and age differences can affect perceptions of body language as well.

For instance, a man who speaks forcefully and uses a strong, upright body posture is often perceived as being capable, worthy, and strong in a business environment. A woman who does those same things, though, is often perceived as pushy, aggressive, and not very likable. Now put both the man and woman behaving that way in a military environment and they will probably both be perceived as capable and effective.

Here's another example. You're in a classroom teaching a group of students when you notice one of them sitting with his arms crossed, back slumped, and looking bored. Your perception is that he is not paying attention to what you are teaching. Later that day you walk past the lounge area of the student union building and see the same student in the same position. Your perception this time around is quite different—he looks tired, unhappy, and perhaps frustrated about something. You saw the same body language in a different context and environment and experienced very different perceptions.

Sometimes, however, the differences in context or environment are not quite as clear or easily identified. Take eye blinking, for example. Rapid blinking is generally perceived as a sign of nervousness or even deceit in nearly every context where there is not an obvious physical reason for that nonverbal behavior. But what if there is a not-so-obvious reason for it? For instance, some medications cause side effects that include rapid blinking of the eyes. This is not the kind of thing you would automatically find out about a person right away, and it is not something that would be immediately obvious.

When body language and context are in conflict, most people default to placing more value on body language. Why? Because in general, body language and nonverbal behaviors are much harder to fake than are words or speech. Your words may say one thing, but if your body language says something different then the people around you will tend to believe your body language more than your words.

It's important to note, though, that not all people default to the nonverbal behaviors when messages are in conflict. They might not be as attuned to body language in general or they may have a positive pre-conceived opinion about the person delivering the conflicted messages. In the latter case, the positive opinion will tend to outweigh the negatives of a conflicting message, at least for a little while.

If your body language is not perceived as appropriate or normal for the context in which it takes place, others will tend toward three basic steps in an attempt to understand and resolve the conflict:

Sometimes, though, body language and context are deliberately in conflict. A discussion about irony or an attempt at sarcasm nearly always includes some type of body language (movement, tone of voice, etc.) that conflicts with the context and the specific situation.

The bottom line here is that conflicts between context and body language are inevitable and there is no clear, certain way to determine how those conflicts will be perceived and resolved by others. If you are the sender then it is in your best interest to reduce the perceived conflict as much as possible, and if you are the receiver then it is in your best interest to make every effort to resolve the perceived conflict without resorting to speculation or unsupported opinions.

Is the person whose mind you wish to read (essentially what people ask me to do when reading nonverbal communication) in:

A church?

A synagogue?

A mosque?

An elementary school?

A prison?

A television studio?

An elegant restaurant?

A lounge in Vegas?

A hotel lobby?

At the beach?

A grocery store?

An automotive dealership?

That's the frame of the context.

The next factor in the context is the event—the why—of why the person is there.

Because they have to be?

Because they are holding the party?

Because they were invited?

Because they are working there?

Because they are visiting?

Because they are scouting for a partner (long- or short-term)?

Because they are attempting to relax?

That's the second and smaller frame.

That means that generally the smaller frame is not as all-encompassing as the large frame.

You could be at a birthday party in a church and you are going to behave not in accordance with the birthday party but within the rules governing the church.

Make sense?

So, you have "where" and "why" and they are both crucial frames.

Those two frames tell you a lot about the person right there.

For whatever reason the person is at the location, it is for a reason.

They may wish they were somewhere else, but for the most part it was their choice to be at this location.

And, it also tells you what the person is not doing.

For example, if the person is at home with her husband on a Friday night, she's not out at a bar with her girlfriends—for some reason. We don't know why, but we do know the facts.

Those facts matter a great deal in reading people.

Have you ever been somewhere you didn't want to be?

Can I give you a list?!

So we all understand that we may not want to be at this location and event but we have agreed to be there.

In all probability the more uncomfortable they are in the situation, the more "leakage" they will express.

In other words, they will unwittingly send more unconscious cues and clues as to why they are in a situation when they really don't want to be there. They don't consciously reveal this information through their body language or any of the other nonverbal communication channels.

But they do ... and they are clueless.

Most people will never pick up on these clues.

If you ever hear me say, "The context is everything," I'm not being literal, but never analyze anything, never be influenced without considering the context first. It's the biggest part of the Secret Language of Business.

How do your perceptions of these categories influence your current body language?