Introduction

I am only one,

But still I am one.

I cannot do everything,

But still I can do something;

And because I cannot do everything,

I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.

—Edward Everett Hale

Have you ever wondered why we so dearly love the story of Cinderella, the downtrodden servant who becomes a princess? Or the tale of Luke Skywalker, a humble farm boy who becomes the savior of the galaxy?

If you think deeply about their stories, you'll realize that while they undergo great transformations, they don't change from being one type of person to being an entirely different person.

Instead, they start out with their inherent greatness suppressed by difficult childhoods and buried by harsh circumstances. Over the course of their adventures, however, they learn to shed the shackles of their past and become their true selves—leaders, inspirational figures, and heroes.

The central message of these stories has great resonance for all of us. As we endure life's hardships, we tend to lose touch with our inner greatness. We start to make distasteful compromises, settle for less, and become people different from our deepest selves.

What Is Your WHAT? empowers you to follow the examples of Cinderella and Luke. If you diligently work through this book's exercises, you'll discover your true potential, become who you were born to be, and achieve profound fulfillment and success.

This will benefit not only you, but the lives of everyone you touch. Once you shed your skin and dump your baggage, you'll possess the magic to positively affect an incredible number of people.

Examples of this process go well beyond fairy tales. Consider the journeys of Mahatma Gandhi, Mother Teresa, and Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., three of the most revered and influential people of the past century.

None was born rich or powerful, but each tapped into a personal blueprint to access natural Gifts; determined the best way, or Vehicle, to make use of those Gifts; figured out who their primary audience was for those Gifts; and then moved Heaven and Earth to share those Gifts with the world.

In other words, they discovered their WHAT, pursued their WHAT with strategic abandon, and persevered until they provided the benefits of their WHAT to those who needed it most.

This is a path that's been followed since the beginning of mankind to achieve dramatic success. It's a model you can, and absolutely should, leverage.

If you have yet to identify your WHAT, don't worry; you will by the time you're done with this book. And in the meantime, you're far from alone.

The tragic truth is most people will reach their deathbeds without taking even one of the three steps to self-fulfillment; they will fail to recognize they were put on this planet to achieve something amazing.

A small number will manage two of the steps. And a very, very small percentage will accomplish all three.

This is in part why so many people are obsessed with celebrities who appear to be “living the dream.” How else can we explain the tremendous popularity of shows about becoming successful in Hollywood, or why some people will spend hours in the rain just to catch a glimpse of a movie or TV star?

We're naturally attracted to those we believe are living their lives to the fullest: people who touch our souls, inspire us to take action, and are living their WHAT.

The good news is there's no privileged secret you must magically uncover in order to join the ranks of those “living the dream.” All you have to do to achieve happiness and prosperity is discover your WHAT, work your tail off, and share your Gifts with the world.

It really is that simple. The world is waiting for you.

The Wisdom of Curly

There are numerous ways to describe your WHAT. One of my all-time favorites can be found in 1991's City Slickers.

In this movie, Mitch Robbins (played by Billy Crystal) takes a break from his busy Manhattan lifestyle to vacation at a dude ranch in the country in an effort to “find himself” and work his way out of a mid-life funk. During this journey, he meets Curly Washburn (played by Jack Palance), who represents everything Mitch is not: carefree, tough as nails, and—most importantly—centered.

I've seen thousands of movies in my life, but there are only a handful that really hit home. What most stuck in my mind from City Slickers was a scene that immediately seemed oddly profound, but I didn't take in its full meaning until years later.

It involves Curly and Mitch, each riding horseback, conversing about life. If you haven't seen the movie, try to imagine a tough, no-nonsense old cowboy wearing a black cowboy hat, red bandana around his neck, black riding gloves, and a lit cigarette hanging tenuously from the corner of his mouth. His voice sounds like it was passed down from Moses, and he talks with the confidence of a man who's seen and lived it all.

In comparison, Mitch is a small, unassuming city guy who's wearing a New York Mets baseball cap, and a shirt and khakis that might've come from L.L. Bean. The best way to describe the difference between them is this eloquent comment Curly makes to Mitch earlier in the movie: “I crap bigger than you.”

In the scene that had the greatest impact on me, Curly says, “You city folk, you worry about a lot of shit.”

Mitch replies, “Shit?! My wife basically told me she doesn't want me around.”

Curly chuckles. “Is she a redhead?”

“I'm just saying—”

Curly interrupts. “How old are you…38?”

“39.”

“Yeah. You all come here at about the same age with the same problems. Spend about 50 weeks a year getting knots in your rope, and then you think two weeks out here will untie them for you. None of you get it. Do you know what the secret of life is?”

“No, what?”

Curly smiles and holds up one finger: “This.”

“Your finger?”

Still holding up one finger, Curly says, “One thing. Just one thing. You stick to that and everything else don't mean shit.”

Mitch holds up his own finger. “That's great. But what's the one thing?”

Curly says, “That's what you've got to figure out….” And then he rides away.

Curly calls it your “One Thing.” I call it your WHAT. It doesn't matter what you call it. You just need to figure out what it is.

Your Two Choices

You now have two choices:

You may be thinking there's just no way the latter is true. For example, if you work with numbers, you might say to yourself, “Spend the next 50 years with clients running spreadsheets, filing tax returns, or planning retirement portfolios? Absolutely not!”

But if you grew up with a flair for math and solving complex equations resonates to your core, then being an accountant or financial planner could be what you are truly compelled to do.

That said, there have been skilled number crunchers who started as part-time bookkeepers and ended up creating financial sector-related endeavors that earned millions.

You don't have to consciously take the three steps to your WHAT to realize your path. Some lucky people naturally find it right away, while others make subtle adjustments over the course of years until they're where they need to be. Still others make an abrupt 180° turn at some point and start a whole new career.

An example of the latter is Dr. Joe Amoia of Emerson, New Jersey. Joe spent tens of thousands of dollars and more than 15 years of his life becoming a licensed chiropractor, opening his own practice, and developing hundreds of loyal patients. If you'd asked him eight years ago whether he'd be dropping his practice and changing careers, he would've laughed at you.

But, today, Joe is the Smarter Dating Guy—a dating and relationship strategist who coaches single women on how to find love.

Why would a successful doctor willingly walk away from what he'd worked so hard to attain? What empowered him to start over from scratch?

He discovered the one thing he was born to do. And once he identified his WHAT, virtually everything else became trivial.

Your WHAT isn't something you choose. Your WHAT has chosen you.

In contrast, the vast majority of people never find their path…mostly because they refuse to recognize it exists.

Even when clients are interested enough to attend my workshops, there are always some who resist the concept. They ask:

It saddens me when people resist discovering who they are and the Gifts they possess. It saddens me even more, however, that some of our world's best minds and most passionate souls have identified their WHAT but are stuck in situations that deprive them of the opportunity to fully achieve their greatness.

If you're reading this from the comfort of an easy chair, a park bench on a beautiful day, or your favorite coffeehouse, count your blessings. Recognize that anything and everything you desire can be yours—because you possess the freedom to pursue your destiny.

Put away all excuses. Be grateful for the opportunities available to you and, most importantly, prepare yourself for a life-altering journey.

A Little About Me

I grew up in Evanston, Illinois, a child of modest beginnings. My parents divorced when I was seven. My brother, sister, and I lived with my mom, who did her best to raise us on a limited income.

I started working at age 10. I took on all kinds of odd jobs—shoveling snow, raking leaves, mowing lawns. If it paid anything, I grabbed it.

In high school I had a 4.0 GPA. I'm not talking Grade Point Average, but Girls Per Attempt. In other words, for every 10 girls I asked out, I averaged four dates.

That actually wasn't bad for a short wannabe player with a frizzy mullet and a gold hoop earring (see Figure I.1). During high school I waited tables, pumped gas, fixed cars, played drums, stocked shelves, worked in restaurants, and even sold speakers out of the back of a van.

Figure I.1 Steve in High School

During my freshman year of college, I began to DJ, and eventually became good enough to spin in the clubs throughout Illinois. This led to my sharing the stage with some of the biggest DJs in the late 1980s and early 1990s, including Bad Boy Bill and Julian Jumpin' Perez.

At age 20, I opened The Funky Pickle! on the main drag in Carbondale, Illinois, just off the campus of Southern Illinois University. The Pickle was a unique concept—a no-alcohol nightclub in the middle of Carbondale's alcohol-suffused nightlife. At first glance, it seemed like a huge mistake, but I had a plan.

I knew the local teenagers had very few options for entertainment. So from 8:00 p.m. to 11:30 p.m., we catered to those under the age of 18. At 11:30 p.m. we closed, cleaned the place up, reopened at midnight and catered to those 18 and over…often until 6:00 a.m.

By city ordinance, bars that served alcohol had to close at 1:30 a.m. Given that we didn't have a liquor license, we could stay open all night long—and we had plenty of customers who appreciated that. Ultimately I had a falling out with my business partner, but with this first success, my entrepreneurial fire was fully ablaze.

I've since gone on to build multiple million-dollar businesses in various fields, including Liquor by Wire (starting as a catalog company, then launching on CompuServe's Electronic Mall in 1993, and becoming one of the first ecommerce websites in 1995); Liquor.com (as cofounder and chairman); and Bold Development (a real estate development company that focuses on adaptive reuse) and I have applied creative approaches to each endeavor.

Not all of my ventures have proven fruitful and I've experienced monumental ups and downs. I've gone through financial ruin, divorce, and battles with depression. But I've also fallen back in love, been blessed with three wonderful children, and built very successful companies.

I've been married to my wife Lena since 1997 and have three incredible sons. Nothing teaches you more about life than love. Love requires patience, kindness, and selflessness—traits that don't always come naturally to me. I work at it every day. And while I often make mistakes, the look of disappointment in the eyes of someone I love always brings me back to center.

Since August 2000, I've trained in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu under one of its true grandmasters—Carlson Gracie Jr.—and the late Carlson Gracie Sr.

Carlson Gracie Jr. is a legend in the sport, having won 10 Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu championships, and is a member of the family that put Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu on the international map. If you're unfamiliar with Jiu-Jitsu, it's a ground-fighting technique in which the objective is to force your opponent to surrender. This subtle persuasion takes place as a result of chokes or limb manipulation (think broken arms, legs, ankles, elbows, etc.). Being choked to the point of unconsciousness and having limbs twisted in directions you never thought humanly possible has resulted in my learning humility and respect in the most painful of ways.

In early 2009, everything shifted. My stepfather, who'd raised me since I was 10, was home in bed dying. The illness he'd fought against for years was finally winning. As we sat together, I held his hand. Though he could no longer verbally express himself, I believe he spoke to me through our physical connection.

A vision of my funeral flashed before my eyes. As I was being lowered into the earth in the dark, damp casket, I could hear the words spoken graveside: “Here lies Steve Olsher. He dedicated his life to chasing the almighty dollar.” That's all that was said.

It was a huge wake-up call that slammed me with the force of a kick to the head. I began to think about what accomplishments I could look back on at the end of my life that would make me feel proud. Interestingly, none of them involved making money.

I'd always had a nagging feeling I was meant to do something extraordinary. The funeral vision made clear that the path I'd forged was leading me away from my natural talents. I was being told to change course. I faced what I now call a YNo (pronounced Yay-No) moment. It's a pivotal moment of truth that can lead you in either of two directions:

I've since learned there's a significant difference between living well and living for the sake of making money.

Don't get me wrong; each of us is entitled to make a phenomenal living. You shouldn't have to apologize for charging what you're worth or resign yourself to life as a starving artist simply because you're compelled to create art. If a top athlete can earn millions for hitting a ball with a stick, why shouldn't a top artist sell paintings, books, or screenplays for millions if that's what the market will bear? And if money isn't your bag, give it away and support your favorite charity.

Ultimately, we're all obligated by our common bond of humanity to pursue not only what brings us financial success, but also what can make a positive impact on our community, our country, and our world. In the years since beginning my transition, I've learned to embrace and develop my intuitive Gift for helping people discover their WHAT. Following this path has led me to

• Costarring in the groundbreaking film The Keeper of the Keys with Jack Canfield, John Gray, and Marci Shimoff
• Founding and running The Reinvention Workshop, which many participants have described as creating the pivotal event in their lives (TheReinventionWorkshop.com)
• Founding and hosting Reinvention Radio (ReinventionRadio.com), “the show dedicated to creating empowered leaders driven to make a monumental difference”
• Writing the Amazon.com bestseller and USA Book News Self-Help Book of the Year, Journey to You: A Step-by-Step Guide to Becoming Who You Were Born to Be (JourneyToYou.com)
• Writing the Business Technology Book of the Year, Internet Prophets: The World's Leading Experts Reveal How to Profit Online (InternetProphets.com)
• Founding and hosting Internet Prophets LIVE! the premier Internet, mobile, and marketing workshop, where the world's best gather to share their knowledge and help participants use that information to change their lives (InternetProphetsLive.com)
• Leading The Circle of 10 (CircleOf10.com), a private, 12-month coaching program that empowers entrepreneurs to realize the income they deserve and lifestyle they desire
• Appearing on the ABC and FOX television networks and more than 300 radio shows, including national programs hosted by Lou Dobbs, Jim Bohannon, and Mancow Muller

Perhaps most fulfilling, I now have the opportunity to speak to people of all ages and see the light in their eyes as they envision creating a life filled with fulfillment, success, and happiness.

I'm not recounting the highlights of my life to boast, but to explain my motivation for writing this book. It's these life experiences that formed this book's bluntly honest, cut-to-the-chase perspectives about personal growth.

Please Take the Shortcut

I wrote What Is Your WHAT? because I want you to celebrate the Gifts that are uniquely yours, share your special talents with the world, and become who you were born to be.

I've developed and refined the proprietary exercises, theories, and principles you'll find in these pages over the past 25 years. They're crafted from my own (often painful) hands-on experience. I've made the mistakes and suffered the inevitable results so you don't have to.

I'm a steadfast believer that we should learn from the trials and tribulations of others. I've been fortunate to benefit from the guidance of incredible teachers. I hope that you'll allow me to mentor you.

My unique methodology blends ancient wisdom (e.g., from Buddha, Lao Tzu, and The Bible) with revolutionary lessons from modern gurus (e.g., Jack Welch, David Allen, and Larry Winget). These teachings, combined with my unique exercises and singular approach to realizing permanent, positive change, form a proven system for ultimate achievement in business and life.

To aid you in your process of discovery, you'll find scattered throughout the book stories and completed WHAT equations from members of my private coaching program The Circle of 10 (CircleOf10.com) and graduates of The Reinvention Workshop (TheReinventionWorkshop.com) who have transformed their lives using this system. You'll also find completed WHAT equations from people whose work you may know, such as Jack Canfield, Chris Brogan, Marci Shimoff, Guy Kawasaki, and Mari Smith, who I sat down with to discuss the key steps along their path of discovering and sharing their WHAT with the world.

As I've mentioned, your WHAT is comprised of three interdependent elements. To maintain a clear focus on your WHAT, I recommend crafting a concise guiding statement that summarizes those elements. Figure I.2 shows an example of a completed WHAT equation.

Figure I.2 Sample WHAT Equation

This book will teach you how to compose your own WHAT equation. It'll also introduce you to powerful shortcuts you can use immediately to move towards the life you deserve.

Of course, you have to do more than just read; you must work through all of this book's exercises and make full use of its tools. In the words of Jim Rohn, the author and motivational speaker who helped launch the careers of such personal development icons as Tony Robbins and Mark Victor Hansen, “You can't hire someone else to do your push-ups for you.”

By the time you're done with this book, you'll have a clear understanding of your life's purpose; and be fired up about, and highly focused on, achieving it. And if you then do the work to bring your WHAT to fruition, you'll enjoy immense emotional and monetary rewards.

How This Book Is Organized

What Is Your WHAT? is organized into three parts.

Part I empowers you to Establish the Foundation, and demonstrates how The Four Stages of Learning impacts who you are and why you do what you do. You'll learn how to set deep anchors into your soul that keep you on your path (as opposed to being a windsock, continually blown off course by external forces). You'll tap into your formidable inner strength and learn to handle certain areas of your life with such mastery that to the rest of the world you'll appear magical.

Part II teaches you how to realize Permanent, Positive Change and introduces you to The Seven Life-Altering Principles (The S.L.A.P.). Each principle provides powerful life strategies and helps you establish clear guidelines for living with conviction and purpose. You'll explore the pitfalls that trip up far too many on the path to prominence and learn the most effective strategies for attaining your goals and objectives.

Part III guides you to Become Who You Were Born to Be by teaching you how to answer the key question: What Is Your WHAT? Identifying your WHAT, and allowing it to guide you to your pre-sent future, will lead you to a freedom beyond anything you've experienced. You'll also learn what to do after discovering your WHAT, and how to attain a clear understanding of who you are, what you were born to accomplish, and how to realize your inherent greatness.

What You Will Achieve

Completing What Is Your WHAT? will empower you to

• Shed the shackles of your past and reconnect with who you really are.
• Leverage your natural talents, honing in on the key areas for which you're wired to excel.
• Uncover and eliminate barriers you've unconsciously created.
• Realize fundamental change at the deepest level of your being—change that will become inseparable from your thoughts and actions.
• Identify your WHAT and establish a plan of action for sharing your WHAT with the world.
• Identify your life's purpose, your goals, and the factors that motivate and inspire you.
• Achieve peace and prosperity.

I firmly believe The Destination Is the Road and The Journey Is the Destination. What Is Your WHAT? is a quest for the most precious of destinations: your true self.

Let's begin your journey.