12.1. Facial Hair (Men and Women) and Other "Shaveables"

12.1.1. Facial Hair (Men and Women) and Other "Shaveables"

Hairy faces and bodies need not be scorned. They merely reflect one's intimate connection with personal ancestry, an admirable quality that indicates solid roots.

But hair—be it on the head or elsewhere—is an odd material that, like acacia thorns, tends to be messy in its most unaffected state. Like any natural material, it holds oils, which in turn hold other particulates like dirt and cheese puff residue. Being relatively lightweight, hair does not always submit to the governance of gravity and has a tendency to come untethered. At best, this is distracting. At worst, it is proof that the wild-haired individual is very, very distant from the person who invented Barbasol.

In the 1800s, a full beard was distinguished in even the highest societies; today, the race to manufacture the first 10-blade safety razor makes the race to Mars look like child's play. Untrimmed beards are for mountain men and cannibals. It may be your thing, a trademark of sorts; however, as a general rule, we're shooting for neatly trimmed beards or clean-shaven visages. Anything in between is no-man's-land, so if you want facial hair at all, you'll need to plan ahead by starting a week or more in advance.

To the womenfolk out there, I'm sorry to say that facial hair just won't do. I feel bad saying it because, in a perfect world, we'd all be free to be you and me. But until society progresses to a greater level of acceptance and love, you'll need to keep trimming if you want to present well on stage.

All parties should be mindful of the neck, chest, and back hair that have a way of debuting on certain specimens. You cannot achieve that authoritative Miami Vice look without a healthy swath of chest hair in the open V of your favorite shirt, so I'm not saying you need to get rid of it; just keep it neat. If you're searching for more specific guidelines, take a poll of trusted women (ensuring that at least two don't have chest hair fetishes).

Leg hair can be categorically disregarded because you shouldn't be wearing shorts on stage in almost any presentation scenario imaginable. More on that later.

12.1.2. Hygiene

Truth be told, there's actually more leeway in the area of personal hygiene than there is in any other element of nonverbal communication. Being onstage means that you are beyond a breath's-length from the nearest listener and, with the exception of intensely volatile body odor, far enough away from the nearest nose so as not to offend any olfactory senses.

Bear in mind that this leeway assumes that you won't be working the crowd before, during, or after the presentation. It also assumes that you are so generally lazy with your hygiene that it doesn't affect your confidence whatsoever. For many individuals, feeling clean and well groomed translates to power and confidence on stage. Protecting your own senses is part of the game.

So what, really, are we talking about here? Hair, teeth, skin, and fingernails. Technically, we could include clothing maintenance to a certain degree, but we'll save that for the section on style. Since most individuals are willing to comply with social standards, we're also talking about planning for interruptions in a normal hygiene schedule.

Your hair should be neat and washed. Your teeth should be brushed (recently) and as white as possible without being fluorescent. Your skin should be as clear as possible and visibly clean (also, avoid excessive tans and sunburns where applicable; this means planning ahead during the summer speaking schedule). Your fingernails should be manicured and clean. It doesn't matter whether you go into a salon or do it yourself: You'd be surprised at how many members of the top brass club are looking at fingernails for the ultimate measure of hygiene.

Most of you are doing these things already. Good. Just remember to plan ahead for the events that make hygiene difficult to achieve. Lost baggage, delayed flights, and other travel mishaps can derail a suitable appearance faster than any other factor. Here are some basic tips for staying clean on the road.

There are millions of business travel tips and tricks out there, but the end goal is simple: Make sure that, no matter what happens, you are able to step on stage feeling clean, fresh, and confident. We can't control what happens, but we can control how we prepare. Don't let outside forces botch your presentation before it's even begun.