Step 7

Diversify the Development Methods

“Sour, sweet, bitter, pungent, all must be tasted.”

—Chinese proverb

Are you familiar with the success of cook-at-home meal delivery services? This is an industry that has rocketed over the last decade in North America, Europe, Asia, Australia, and elsewhere. For busy singles, couples, and families, it gives them ready access to a variety of meals they create themselves. And despite the cost of these ongoing subscriptions, which many people object to, the industry has attracted a devoted segment of the population who cross that cost barrier, enticed by the variety, new taste exposure, ease of use, and the hands-on nature of the meal preparation. They have an appetite to learn different cooking methods and have new taste experiences that make going home to the evening meal inviting. No question, the variety increases its appeal (Melton 2017).

You can use a similar approach to mentoring to keep your mentee enticed in the learning process, making them hungry to try different types of development—a variety of experiences that engages and grows them. While this approach relies on you to offer various development options, this chapter provides you with a bounty of great ingredients, and you can add your own to the mix. Diversifying development approaches begins with understanding what characterizes a highly valuable development option. Then you and your mentee are ready to explore an array of options, uncovering which of these will be most appropriate and satisfying for your mentee.

Recognize What Is Effective for Development

You’ve already got a satiating development process going on with your mentee: rich and focused conversations, field-testing new behaviors, taking on stretch assignments, talking with peers or experts, and increasing self-awareness. All of these constitute the heart of your mentoring. Many mentors would stop there; however, you can take this further. Because your mentee is in a dedicated learning experience with you, adding more value by bolstering that with additional learning methods will make the growth even more significant and exciting. Yet given the sizable number of development options and tools (including webinars, assessments, podcasts, projects, online trackers, and volunteer work), it is tough to know what will work best. How will you select options that give your mentee something that is tailored for this situation and yields the highest return for the investment of time? Will you know it when you see it?

When it comes to supplementing your mentoring efforts, consider development approaches that fit the four standards shown in Figure 7-1.

FIGURE 7-1

FOUR STANDARDS FOR SELECTING A DEVELOPMENT OPTION

Optimizes the Main Goal You Are Working On

Look for development that deepens what you are already have in progress, rather than take the mentee in another direction. For example, avoid adding too much focus on development based on hot new articles that are not related to the mentee’s purpose, even when they are fascinating to you. Your time together is too precious for many of these topical conversations. This is a reminder of Guiding Principle #1: Start where your mentee is. Stay focused on the main goal, giving them greater context, helping them understand how others are affected by their actions, or providing lessons learned from experts. In short, this standard focuses on providing additional insight that ensures the mentoring goal is met with even greater depth and breadth. As an example, one mentor whose mentee was working on a team project that was going to create department-wide changes in procedure explored these options with his mentee:

• Learn how to use tools such as process mapping to help plan out the sequence of changes.

• Construct an impact scenario to share with the entire team and have them build scenarios as well.

• Conduct stakeholder interviews to learn about their needs during the change.

Appeals to Your Mentee

Serving a luscious steak dinner at your home won’t get a vegan guest excited. Likewise, look for development options that are naturally appealing to your mentee. While people learn best through a mix of methods, our learning preferences vary. What is enjoyable for some is a labor for others. Does your mentee learn most readily from experimenting, reading and reflecting, listening, or watching others? And, though decades of studies have tried to pinpoint how to develop people based on their personal learning styles, several metadata studies on learning styles upended that approach, concluding that trying to fit a learning option to a person’s learning style has negligible impact. (Goldhill 2016). The best way to discern what is appealing is to simply ask, which also adds to their buy-in of taking on the development. Given a group of mentees who are all developing skills to get the most valuable responses from customer focus groups, their astute mentors differentially suggest options that fit their mentee, such as watch a video, interview an expert, listen to a podcast, increase perspective by participating in focus groups themselves. Consequently, do not be disappointed if your mentee did not want to read a favorite article; simply look for options that appeal to a different style of learning.

Adds Personal Meaning

Look for options that are personally meaningful for your mentee. Well-known author, speaker, and talent development expert Josh Bersin tells us that when we take on work that calls to us and feels purposeful, we do better work. Research shows that people who find their work meaningful have higher performance, stronger relationships, and are more engaged (Bersin 2015). Those are phenomenal outcomes to having work that is purposeful. And, given that only a minority of people (28 percent, as highlighted in this Bersin article) find their workdays meaningful, this approach can be wonderfully enriching for your mentee.

Consider that although your mentee’s primary mentoring goal may outwardly seem somewhat disconnected to their personal passion, you can help them uncover what development action creates a connection to greater meaning. This supports Guiding Principle #4: Be flexibly goal oriented. For example, if the mentee is working on team leadership skills and also has an abiding interest in the environment, have them step up on that task force at work that is focused on increasing the company’s environmentally friendly practices. Or, if your mentee is a passionate fitness buff, find a way to tie that together with their goal of learning how to influence (for example, head a workforce campaign to encourage employees to adopt more healthy habits). Tying personal purpose to the development option is an incredibly powerful combination that has your mentee take the learning even further.

Imprints a Memory

Look for development options that will create long-lasting impact. Remember high school science lab? The chemistry teacher took concepts off the page and blew them up in the lab. My chemistry class really left quite an impression on me, and that teacher is one for whom I can actually still remember his first and last name. Given that your mentee has so much coming at them each day, ensure the options selected truly make the lesson sticky. Several qualities of the development experience that make it sticky include:

• uniqueness—an experience the mentee has never tried before (and many others haven’t either), such as visiting an innovative robotics facility to learn strategic perspective

• emotional elements—this option could have hidden surprises or pulls at your heartstrings, such as interviewing someone (not just watching one) who thrived after a natural disaster, as a way to learn about resilience

• credibility—exposure to a professional who is best-in-class, such as taking an online class in writing from James Patterson (yes, when this book went to press, MasterClass offered that option; MasterClass 2018).

Explore Options for Development

“It’s just OK,” Denise responded with hesitation during a check-in with me about how her mentoring relationship was going. Denise was mentoring Celia, a talented, creative web developer whose aim is to head her department in two years. However, her attempt to use the same approach with Celia that she had with her last two mentees was not working. Denise was close to writing Celia off as maybe not really being motivated with mentoring. “Last year, when I recommended a particular book to Joe, it really sparked him and led to intense conversations and lots of application on his part. This year, knowing Celia’s interests, I recommended a great book to fit her needs; she reviewed the inside cover on Amazon and said maybe she’d read it in the future. I tried again with trending articles on innovation and, again, it went nowhere.” Denise eventually did catch on: Although she consumes books in volume, her mentee Celia was not much of a reader and preferred other avenues of learning. Denise had to separate out her learning style from Celia’s.

The options for development that complement your mentoring can be numerous. The following 11 options are described, giving information about learning situations with which they resonate and the general steps for implementing them. As you and your mentee explore, you may want to test them against the standards for selecting development options provided here, so that the option you select meets at least two, if not all four, of the standards.

Journaling

This is used to increase self-observation skills and reflection and to track progress. Mentees who enjoy reading and writing find this particularly appealing, though as a development option, it can be used universally by all mentees (and mentors). The approach uses a bit of structure, which your mentee creates; sample ground rules include:

• Make entries at the beginning or end of each day.

• Focus on incidences related to the primary mentoring goal.

• Provide description of what occurred, how you felt, and the impact that was made.

• Allow time to review and reflect.

A recurring question for journal reflection is “What am I learning about myself? How do I see myself differently?” As the mentor, there is no need to ask what your mentee is writing about. Instead, use more questions in your conversations that address their “internal processes,” such as their mindset going into situations, feelings, obstacles they are encountering, willingness to take risks, and newfound confidence. These questions will both draw out what they have already written and encourage them to do further journaling.

Coach Others

This is used for mentees who want to solidify their knowledge or expertise by helping others to learn without direct teaching or telling (that is, facilitate the other person to make their own sense of it and apply the knowledge). This is useful for mentees in a team leadership, management, or training role. Prior to the coaching of others, discuss coaching methods with your mentee, using a coaching modality as you do this. For example, instead of telling your mentee what to do, ask what they believe will be most effective. Ask about the actions they will take as well as about their feelings while doing this. If they need more help, brainstorm ideas together. Test out various scenarios they may encounter, including handling defensiveness and objections. Help them understand the power of leveraging questions, how to observe and respond to nonverbal cues, and how to use paraphrasing. At your next meeting, debrief the coaching session they conducted, identify what new awareness they have about what was required of them, and generate ideas for how they can continue to improve.

Reverse Mentoring

As a specific type of coaching, reverse mentoring is when your mentee provides development for you, a peer, or someone else. The learning targets can be enhancing interpersonal relationship skills or facilitating learning in others without direct teaching or telling. It is a reciprocal arrangement where your mentee provides the other person an opportunity to learn more about a discipline in which they are particularly skilled. The typical focus is on social media, technology, or current trends in their field. Do not be confused by the use of the term mentoring here. There is not an expectation during this reverse mentoring that your mentee is establishing an all-out mentoring process, as you are. Instead, they are focused on specific subject matter, using the principles of coaching for a relatively short term. Participate only if you have a sincere interest in this, or it could be detrimental to your ongoing mentoring. If this is not of interest to you, no worries; they can set up this reciprocal arrangement with someone else. It can be a very satisfying and growth-promoting experience for your mentee.

Interview Experts

This is used to deepen technical knowledge and perspective. Guide your mentee to think through their skills in this area and pinpoint where they’d like to improve, plus what else they would like to learn. Have them prepare a set of questions that uncovers areas where they’d like to learn more while also making good use of the expert’s time (avoid spending time with the expert on the basics). They should also prepare introductory remarks so that proper expectations are set with the expert and the expert knows how to tailor remarks. A well-known financial and consulting institution has their mentors and mentees use this process regularly to help mentees understand the workings of this complex organization. After the meeting with the expert, have them debrief their learnings with you and post in their journal. If they have not already done so, they should send a thank-you note to the expert; this is a good way to build an ongoing relationship.

Site Visit

Use this to attain a new vantage point on how their own business functions, given a different context. Professionals learn about how the other company operates and gets results. You may be aware that among the best known site visits, where much learning has been transferred, are the electronic and manufacturing facilities in Japan. Factory visits are so popular in Japan that TripAdvisor actually provides a long list of such tour options. For your mentee, you probably won’t find a preset visit plan. This development option requires setting up the visit, and you can help find the site through your connections (either directly or through others). Your mentee should identify objectives for the visit. During the visit, they should focus flexibly on those objectives as well as other elements the host wants to offer. To maximize the value of the site host, they may want to include others from their department on the visit. This adds to their presence within their company, and managers will take note. As with other methods, be sure to debrief, ask about new perspectives gained, and discuss how they can apply what they’ve learned.

Create Visuals

This method is very useful for helping the mentee see the bigger picture of context surrounding the situation and requires no artistic talent. Some visual methods can be done on the back of an envelope; some require hours of thinking and researching. You and your mentee then review the visual together. As an example, creating a simple time line and answering the question, “What happened and when?” allows the mentee to map out a challenge in detail and then discuss it with their mentor, who might ask questions such as “What assumptions did you make going into that meeting?” “Where did the planned actions start to go off track?” “What possible invisible influences are not depicted here?” A favorite visual of mine is Stakeholder Mapping, which can be used to identify the sources of influence and what they are looking for within a particular project. Any of the visual methods will open up a conversation, provide new vantage points, and supply your mentee with yet another tool they can add to their kit.

Role Play or Rehearsal

This method is used to help your mentee get ready for challenging interactions with others (for example, a negotiation or influencing) or for presentation (such as, sales report to management). It creates a link from “thinking” about what can occur to actually “feeling” it, viscerally. In the live interaction with you, they can hear their own words, experience their emotion, and be subject to your responses and questions to practice the live interactions. It builds the experience as well as self-knowledge. If there is an opportunity, video the session for your mentee, which serves as its own source of feedback that can be reviewed again and again. As an example, for 911 operators, mentors work with their mentees regarding the myriad calls they could receive, ranging from life-threatening situations to a cat stuck in a tree. Rehearsal and role play can be a primary tool for learning their profession. Tool 7-1 provides a format for a role play. Wrap up the sessions by highlighting your mentee’s plans for doing this in real time.

Experts on Video

We do not need to learn from experts solely through books and articles. Any number of services provide experts on video, so we can hear these ideas straight from the source. For example, billed as “ideas worth spreading,” TED Talks provide in-depth focus on singular topics by subject matter experts. Video recordings from various other sources (including subscription services targeting wide-ranging topics of interest for those in the work world) are usually curated to make access by topic more manageable. These can be used with your mentee both for the content and as a role model on speaking and presentations. Your role is straightforward with this one. Help your mentee zero in on what topics and speakers will be most beneficial, given their goal. Watch the same video yourself. At your next conversation, debrief the value of the video content and how it can be transformed into actions or self-insights for your mentee.

TOOL 7-1

FORMAT TO CONDUCT ROLE PLAYS

Pair Up With a Colleague

This is used to learn from a co-worker, increase interpersonal skills, share accountabilities, and increase capability in co-creation. Depending on the formality in their workplace, your mentee may need to pass this by their manager. This starts with identifying the specific purpose of what is to be gained by this partnership on part of a job, special assignment, or targeted task. Then, an agreement is formulated regarding how your mentee and their work partner will work together, share responsibilities, handle differences, manage time and performance, and check progress for the targeted length of time.

Your mentee should carefully identify their partner, choosing someone from whom they can learn and who has good work habits. Your mentee should expect to share knowledge and feedback, co-create solutions, and be enthusiastic about the process. This pairing can vary in length; a half day, several times during a week or two, or longer. Your debrief can focus on how they are managing expectations, what they are learning about the discipline, and how they see themselves differently.

Volunteer Work

This can be used to gain exposure to a wide range of potential experiences that may not be available to your mentee on the job. Everything from customer relations, negotiations, leadership roles, marketing, budget administration, policy development, and more can be found in volunteer roles.

I previously worked with an executive who took a volunteer role as chairman of a board of a public organization, and used that experience to help demonstrate his CEO capabilities for his next professional move in a corporate setting. This is a significant commitment. Your mentee should select a volunteer organization carefully and commit only to a well-run organization, and one that understands their developmental interests and can deliver on them. Regularly check in on how the volunteer work is going, what is being learned, what obstacles they are encountering, and how they can transfer that learning to other parts of their work life.

Change Perspective

This is used to think more broadly, understand biases, solve problems, and collaborate better with others. When you find your mentee is stuck on an embedded problem that could benefit from different vantage points, use a process called “reframing.” Have them identify the challenge from their own perspective and write it down (such as a customer being inflexible about pricing). Then, have them jot down the same issue from several other perspectives. For example, they could write the issue from the perspectives of their department head, customer, the accounts manager, and customer response team. Now, have them write a viable solution from each of the other perspectives. Then, given the multiple perspectives, have them create a new solution they could apply. You can use this with your mentee during one of your meetings and ask them to use it again when a new situation arises.

We have reviewed only 11 of the scores of methods that diversify your approach to development. Build a reference file for yourself and add other methods you have used or learned about from other mentors. Ask other mentors what was particularly helpful for them to advance growth with their mentees and themselves.

Tool 7-2 summarizes how to approach the general standards for identifying a significant development option and selecting the one that suits your mentee and will inspire further learning.

TOOL 7-2

DIVERSIFYING YOUR MENTEE’S DEVELOPMENT OPTIONS

Apply criteria to identify a development option that works for your mentee: • Pinpoint where more learning would allow your mentee to add depth and breadth in achieving their mentoring goal. • Seek out learning methods that are most appealing to them, or that they would be willing to try. • Uncover: If their life were filled with purpose, what would they be doing? What kinds of actions or principles really bring meaning to their life and work? Then, explore how development options could be connected to this. • Consider what would make this development most memorable. Determine one or more complementary development options aligned with the development goal: • Review options provided in this chapter or co-create other development options and begin to craft the development action. • Determine scope (how much time to be spent, over what period of time) of this development action, given the value to be realized. • Help ensure success: Pinpoint the objective, help your mentee set expectations for what can be accomplished, identify any prework needed to make the most of the experience. Always debrief the development experience so that the learning sticks and makes the entire experience far more likely to result in lasting behavior change. Ask questions focused on: • Where are they growing? • What are they learning about themselves? • What will be the impact of this learning on their performance? • How can they further apply these newly expanded skills? • How does it bring your mentee closer to achieving their mentoring goal?

Let’s return to Denise and Celia. When Celia was not interested in reading a book or article, Denise wondered how committed Celia really was to the mentoring process. Now that we have explored the criteria for choosing complementary development as well as a list of such options, what approach would you recommend Denise take? Given that the options mentioned in this chapter comprise only a partial list, your answer may introduce additional development ideas. Personally, there are a couple options that come to mind:

• Denise might explore with Celia that she have a conversation with an expert outside her company, such as the head of a web design unit at an ad agency (which also acts as a mini site visit). This would open her perspective as to what is required when juggling multiple clients and a team of creatives. Denise could then help Celia identify competencies needed to add to her long-term plan.

• Denise could support Celia’s effort to provide ongoing coaching for a department member who wants to grow, really fine-tuning her coaching skills (such as listening and asking productive questions), so Celia is further prepared for an important element of managing others. Denise could guide Celia to ask that person for feedback regarding how the coaching is going and what else would be helpful to the team member.

With Celia’s experimentation in a plan like this, imagine how the mentoring would take on a broader range and expand the ongoing conversations they have. Celia will find additional ways to grow and test new behaviors, and Denise will experience Celia as fully committed.

Diversify Your Own Development as a Mentor

What about you and your development? Are there actions you can take to diversify your growth as a mentor? Of course there are. In fact, as part of post-mentoring program assessments I have led (completed by mentees and mentors after they have concluded a mentoring program), some of the most gratifying comments come from the mentors regarding how much they are learning—both new skills and about themselves. And the proof is in their continued enthusiasm to voluntarily rejoin the mentoring program year after year. Mentors who continuously grow are great role models for mentees and other professionals. When their nonmentor colleagues commend them and say, “I wish I could mentor, I just do not have the time,” these mentors just smile, knowing how much value the work gives them, that they gladly participate and are better for it.

As with your mentee, there is a wide menu of options for your own development. Here is an array of development options specifically geared to mentors.

Create Your Mentor’s Toolkit

Set up an e-folder or a section in your library for resources. Given that you may mentor again and again, new interests and challenges may crop up with each new mentee. Create a habit of storing those materials recommended by others. Be on the lookout for tools, videos, and models that may be of value for use with your current and future mentees. If you are part of a mentoring program, you may already be provided with a tool kit, but don’t stop there. Search for content focused on, for example, growing leaders, technical expertise, emotional intelligence, decision making models, project management, innovation, strategic thinking, and navigating politics.

Participate in a Mentors’ Peer Group

Following an approach used by executive coaches, a number of mentoring communities have mentors’ peer groups. The purpose is to coach one another given current mentoring situations, raise insight, and share knowledge. With confidentiality assured, each mentor has an opportunity to present a case, while other mentors use coaching approaches to help the presenter explore issues, their internal mindset, and potential approaches. The peers use insight-raising questions rather than provide direct solutions (that is, this is not intended to be a problem-solving forum). The focus is clearly on each mentor’s growth, rather than on the mentee. Groups are kept small (five to seven members), ground rules are set, and they meet at a regularly scheduled time, often virtually. Often, an experienced coach or facilitator guides the group. Tool 7-3 can help create an approach that works for you and your peers.

TOOL 7-3

SAMPLE FORMAT FOR MENTORS’ PEER GROUP

• Form a group of 5-7 peer mentors and identify a group facilitator. • Plan regular meetings (e.g., monthly); approximately 1 hour. • Use a conference line or video chat to ensure most mentors will attend each meeting. • Preplan the meeting, identifying one or two mentors who will prepare to present their case. • Sample meeting agenda: Each mentor provides a very brief update on the progress of their mentoring. One or two mentors present their case: – Describe specific interaction with mentee and approach you applied (e.g., using high-gain questions to help increase mentee’s self-awareness). – Provide anticipated outcome you hoped to achieve with the mentee. – Explain what happened and the impact for the mentee and yourself. – Identify challenges (e.g., complications, hurdles, surprises you encountered in addressing the mentee) and/or successes (e.g., a breakthrough with the mentee). All other mentors use a mentor’s approach to respond to the case presenter (e.g., use thought-provoking questions, help to open up perspective, brainstorm ideas for additional approaches); identify what you learn from the presenter’s approach. Meeting wrap-up: each mentor peer describes key learning from that day’s conversation and what they anticipate for the next steps in work with their mentee.

Take Assessments

Find a professional source to take one or more assessments to learn more about yourself, what styles of operating and thinking distinguish you, and how you differ from those with other styles. Generally, such assessments are administered by someone certified in that particular assessment tool, with that expert providing you the results and feedback. It is a bit of an investment, and yields benefits not only related to being a great mentor, but also to your job and other relationships.

One of most used assessments in the workplace worldwide is the MBTI (Myers–Briggs Type Indicator). Whether you use this one or not, know the value of assessments that have validity and reliability tests conducted regularly to ensure its quality. Results help you understand your mode of operation compared to others, and raise awareness of your tendencies, strengths, and blind spots, and importantly, how you can bridge to others. Another assessment is the DiSC Profile, which helps its users better understand their preferences, adapt to others, and improve their communications with others. These two are just a small sampling; there are a couple dozen other highly reputable and well-validated assessments. Choose one that interests you and that you feel is best positioned to help you as a mentor and a coach.

Tap Into Professional Coaching Methods

As a discipline, executive leadership coaching provides a countless number of resources, studies, tools, books, and videos. While the certification process for executive coaching is extensive and takes years, the methods used by executive coaches are often aligned with what mentors do. Skills such as listening, providing empathy, building trust, and holding confidences are shared by the best mentors and coaches alike. Peruse the International Coaches Federation website (www.coachfederation.org) to gain access to research and articles on methods used. Take a look at journals for executive coaches as well.

Take Training on Cultural Awareness and Valuing Differences

Every year, the world is more and more interconnected. Cultures, countries, and ethnicities all meet and mingle. How well do we appreciate, respect, and value our differences from others? Years ago, on a business trip to Japan, during the first day of meetings I was asked if I’d like a boxed lunch, and responded affirmatively. Similar to meals at many corporate meetings, I expected something like a small salad, a sandwich, and fruit, all packaged in a disposable box. Instead, I was astonished to receive an exquisitely decorated lacquered Bente box, filled with rice balls, several types of fish, sushi, marinated vegetables … in all, 16 colorful and distinctive items. Thinking I had been given someone else’s lunch, I told my host that I had asked for a “regular” boxed lunch. Clearly, my expectation for a boxed lunch was way off. If I’d had an open mindset, I would not have been so surprised.

When you have a mentee whose world is so different from your own, you need to be tuned in and open. Consider it part of your job description (Guiding Principle #1: Start where your mentee is), not the other way around. Participating in training on cultural awareness or valuing differences opens up your thinking, has you check your assumptions, and makes you aware of what is called “unconscious bias.” You become more available to your mentees and more appreciative of them. These training programs may be offered by your company or found online.

You want to be the most masterful mentor possible (Guiding Principle #7: Bring your best self). The more you develop, the more skills and resources you have, the more you can offer your mentees. Your personal growth not only makes you more capable, but it also it makes you more inspiring—part of the mentor magic.

The Next Step

The last few chapters have been dedicated to mentoring methods and approaches you are using throughout the mentoring process that lead to remarkable results (leveraging experience for development, expanding growth by using everyday psychology, elevating the power of questions, and diversifying development methods). Throughout the entire process, you are continuously enlightened by the use of the seven guiding principles. Next, let’s consider pushing even further by having your mentee enhance crucial influence skills. Increased ability to influence will allow others to appreciate what your mentee can now bring to the table, as well as provide more opportunities to apply those new skills.