Overcoming Barriers to Understanding

“Listening, really listening, is tough and grinding work, often humbling, sometimes distasteful, says author Robert H. Waterman Jr. in The Renewal Factor: How to Get and Keep the Competitive Edge. When good listeners are on the receiving end of a message, they may come up against many potential barriers to understanding. To be aware of them is the first step to avoiding them.

The rate at which a typical speaker talks (about 140 words per minute) and the rate a listener can understand (from about 280 to 560 words per minute) is exploited by TV and radio commercials using electronically altered speech to tell and sell listeners more. Some speakers, such as auctioneers, talk at a rate of speed much faster than the average listener can comprehend. With practice, even this fast-talking style can be understood. Most people can think three times faster than the person who is sending the message.

If the typical speaker simply talks faster, however, the words sound rushed or anxious. In a training situation it is estimated that the trainee retains only 15 percent of the spoken or written word. Other problems may originate with the speaker because he or she:

• may be reluctant to convey the message

• hasn't thought the message through

• is misinformed or lying

• has speech difficulties

• has an accent different from that of the listener

• lacks the vocabulary to explain the matter at hand or, conversely, uses highly specialized jargon that the listener can't decode

• uses nonverbal communication that does not support his or her words

• fails to state early on why the message may be of interest to the listener

On the other hand, a listener may:

• be preoccupied and may not shift from this internal dialogue to the external conversation

• be distracted by positive or negative emotional trigger words

• feel on the defensive and concentrate on a rebuttal or counterattack before getting the whole message

• be distracted by reactions to the speaker's clothes, hair style, and so forth

• feel superior to and disrespectful of the speaker

• be impatient and interrupt because he or she has other pressing business, believes this message is a waste of time, and suspects the message will be unpleasant

• lack the vocabulary or understanding of nonverbal communication needed to interpret the message

• have impaired hearing—although a profoundly deaf person can be a “good listener” in the sense of mental and emotional receptiveness to messages from others

Other potential barriers to understanding include a physically uncomfortable or disruptive setting, or too much distance between the speaker and listener.

To better understand what another person is saying, the listener may ask him or her to come back at a more convenient or specific time. Waiting until they can both move to a less distracting place, the door can be closed, or phone calls held will create a setting that enhances rather than inhibits understanding. Rephrasing, defining, or elaborating on part of it, clarifies that the listener has interpreted the speaker's meaning correctly.

The listener may also work to keep an open mind about the content and value of the whole message. He or she should avoid being sidetracked by reactions to appearance, accent, and emotional trigger words. Attention to the speaker's nonverbal communication is equally important. Lastly, the listener should find a position conducive to listening— choosing to stand or sit near the speaker, away from scenic views, clocks, and other distractions.