Real estate, perhaps more than any other large business, is about people. It’s about the connection you can make with other people—between you and the investors, the bankers, the contractors, the architects, and so many other players. You need to be able to communicate with them and understand their needs, incentives, and motivations.

Every person who has ever had any measurable success in real estate has invested time and effort on a consistent basis to connect and develop relationships with other people who are integral parts of the real estate industry. You will interact with brokers, bankers, investors, advisers, market experts, appraisers, builders, architects, interior designers, asset managers, property managers, and others on a regular basis. For example, see the Circles of Influence diagram in Figure 16.1 to get a feel for how a Titan like Gina Diez Barroso spends an average week. She has built relationships with every possible person in the real estate industry. Once you see her reach in the real estate world, you can understand how she can wield such major influence.

The Titans share the humility to know that they are not able to do everything on their own. This is why they surround themselves with great people. Success attracts talent, and exceptional success at the level of these Titans attracts the brightest and the best. People who are committed to becoming winners and doing the work required to succeed want to be associated with other winners. The Titans have learned to be able to deal with people at different skill levels and competencies, but they get to choose the best available talent when they are assembling their own team.¹ That just amplifies the Titan’s “impossible is nothing” mindset and further improves their ability to operate successfully.

Surround Yourself with Smarter People

It is easy to understand how Titans can surround themselves with smart people. But how do we do that when we’re just starting out? The process begins with understanding your areas of strength. What are your innate talents? What skills have you developed? In which areas of knowledge have focused your studies? What are your current assets? Remember that everyone shares the same and most important asset: time. Ambition and work ethic are also assets. You are fully in control of how you spend or invest your time to pursue your vision and how much effort you are willing to expend to get there. When you are confident about what you bring to the table, you can find people who will be happy to join you, bringing their different resources to support your mission.

Look at your goals and action plan. Make a list of the professionals you need to help you accomplish each one of those goals. Start learning about the professionals in your market. Find out how long they have been in business. Inquire about their involvement in the community and their reputation. Find out if they belong to any networking groups, fraternal organizations, or social clubs. Drop in and introduce yourself and find out what they need from you to help them perform at their peak. That one consideration will automatically put you in higher esteem with them than the average real estate professionals they interact with.

This is how you begin to form alliances and networks. Once you know the people you need to add to your resource list, you will be able to expand your social circle with purpose. Far too many people are part of closed social circles. The 10 or 20 people they know all only know each other. If you are a dentist who only knows other dentists with the same specialty as yours, you may have plenty to talk about, but there isn’t much opportunity for you to learn new things.

At an early age, these Titans set their sights on finding and working for the best mentors. Some followed the path that had been forged by their fathers. Others took jobs straight out of college with people who were already doing what they themselves dreamed of doing. They made a conscious choice to listen, observe, take notes, and learn from those who had already learned the hard lessons, worked out an elegant solution, or forged a new path toward profiting in real estate. Making the choice to follow their examples will change the trajectory of your career path above and beyond whatever you may have dared to dream.

Power of the Mastermind

Your first step to surrounding yourself with excellence is to start or join a real estate mastermind. This is a group of people who meet once a week to share what they’ve been working on, get feedback, and have a chance to gain more wisdom from others. Far too many new real estate entrepreneurs get stuck, operating in isolation and making decisions by themselves. Sometimes, just having someone to listen to your ideas is enough to help you make better decisions.

In addition, a mastermind could become another source of new deals. Because you are surrounding yourself with other people who will want you to succeed, they could pass along opportunities to you. The person in the mastermind might suggest a project they would like to partner on with you; perhaps they can put up most of the capital and you put in the work. Ideally, you’ll eventually outgrow that mastermind and look to surround yourself with even bigger players and relationships.

As you look to create relationships, understand your strengths and where you can add value to others. Offer your talent or expertise to people you look up and want to connect with. Offer tips or solutions in areas where these people could possibly use help. Become their friend. A big network with real connections will provide you with more opportunities and you will find that more doors will open.

Mentors

Finding a great mentor can significantly improve your chances of success because you’ll have someone on your side who has already gone through many of the challenges you will likely face. By listening to and learning from someone who has probably already experienced the same problem, you are reducing the probabilities of mistakes you could make. You are also decreasing the time it takes to reach success because you are eliminating the trial-and-error learning method that you would have to use if you were alone.

Good mentors are those who have already achieved success in your chosen field. Good mentors will push you to pursue new challenges and get you out of your comfort zone. They will encourage you to focus on constantly improving and growing. They will identify your weakness, give you constructive feedback, and help you improve. They will help you acknowledge and learn to rely upon your strengths. Good mentors will keep you steady—encouraging you during those tough times that undoubtedly pop up, and keeping you grounded when you make a great deal.

A survey of 200 leading global CEOs by the Stanford Graduate School of Business found that mentorship provides numerous benefits.² Specifically, 100 percent of the CEOs mentioned that they enjoy the process of being coached and receiving leadership advice; 78% of the CEOs revealed that it was their own idea to go out and receive coaching.

According to the US Small Business Administration, 30 percent of new businesses do not survive the first 24 months, and 50 percent do not make it past 5 years. However, 70 percent of mentored businesses survive longer than 5 years, and 88 percent of business owners with a mentor say that having one is invaluable.³ Your chances of success in life and in business can be amplified by having the right mentor.

Good mentors usually have a vast network of people in the same market or industry you are in. They will likely offer to introduce you to new potential investors, developers, business partners, brokers, market consultants, and others.

Both Bob Faith and Ron Terwilliger had Trammel Crow as their mentor. Trammel taught them about hard work, doing things in an ethical way, and thinking big. They took the initiative to learn deeply from his wisdom. You might be wondering how one goes about finding a mentor in the real estate business.

Start with someone you already know. If you are in the real estate business, you can write down a list of people you’ve met in the business. Further refine your list to individuals you particularly admire. Reach out to them and let them know that you are seeking their advice. Respect their time. If you don’t know too many people in the real estate industry you can ask your network for recommendations. Every connection has the potential to open the doors to new connections and opportunities. The very best way to find a mentor, a way that has worked for me, is to focus on giving value first to people that you look up to and aspire to be around.

Giving Value

Giving value means giving something to someone else and expecting nothing in return. The biggest mistake most people make when approaching real estate billionaires or other successful persons in real estate it is to start by asking for something. There is a common misperception that billionaires have everything they need. This is not true. They are also people. But people approach them all the time, asking for things without offering anything in return. It can become tiresome and irritating.

When you are interacting with people you want to connect with, make yourself stand out in the crowd by being the person who sincerely wants to be of service. Leave every conversation knowing more about the other people than they know about you. Be truly interested in the goals of others and ask questions that help them find solutions. You will become an interesting person to them. They will want to talk with you again. Be genuine. Be yourself. People at that top appreciate that far more than you can imagine.

Another way to give value is finding a way to help them with something at which they might not be so proficient. You might meet somebody who is a master at putting together a sophisticated transaction but admittedly clueless when it comes to online marketing and social media. If this is one of your strengths, you can reach out and offer to promote that person’s firm or new project on your social media outlets. You could also propose to help train the firm’s marketing person in this specific field. Ask for nothing in return.

When you start doing favors without expectation of return for people you deem worthy, something magical happens. You stop getting worried about people returning your favor, and when people start to do favors for you, these will likely be bigger than the favors you did for them. Think of favors as your opportunity to put positive karma and value into the universe and make it a better place. Give from your heart expecting nothing in return. The universe will balance it all out in the end and return to you in much bigger proportions.