So often gurus tell us to find a balance in our life, but what does that really mean? Eight hours’ sleep, eight hours’ work and eight hours’ fun? I’m not sure if balance can be achieved through time allocation; however, it can be achieved by taking small, incremental steps that create a state of mind — a feeling of being in flow.

What do I mean by being in flow? It is best explained as the feeling you have when everything is working out for you. Goals are achieved with a greater sense of ease, even a feeling of effortlessness. One opportunity leads to another and that leads to another, which ultimately opens a door for you to attain a goal you had previously had no idea how you could achieve. It is a set of circumstances that manifest themselves in your life, connecting you to the right person and moving you forward and closer to your next milestone.

It does not mean you have no challenges, but you seem to be able to take them in your stride. You are calmer, more composed and find simple solutions that are easy to implement and resolve the issues.

Often what happens is that in hindsight you see or find the reason for the challenge being given to you in the first place. Being in flow means being on purpose, pursuing the goals that are right for you, living the life you have predetermined, and believing you deserve those results.

The opposite to being in flow is being stuck.

Have you ever felt stuck in life? Nothing seems to be working for you and every corner you turn reveals another roadblock. Challenges mount up, one after another, and you feel like the whole world has conspired to make your life a living hell. That is what being totally stuck means.

A stuck state does not happen overnight; it creeps up on you over time through the actions you take or fail to take, choices that do not support your being the best you that you can be, achieving more, doing more and gaining better results.

Looking at the figure below, to be in flow you need the scale to be tipped towards the right-hand end.

Let’s look at why you get stuck and what you can do to get back into flow. You become stuck when you stop making decisions, when you become indecisive, when procrastination creeps in. Procrastination is the greatest contributor to being stuck, because procrastination is the greatest robber of self-esteem and self-confidence.

What you need when making a decision is self-confidence in the choice you make. The problem normally begins when you put off the little things, then bigger decisions, until finally you avoid making any decision for fear of being wrong or facing scrutiny or criticism for the choices
you make.

PROCRASTINATION IS THE GREATEST ROBBER OF
SELF-ESTEEM & SELF-CONFIDENCE.

Doubt is a by-product of procrastination and a catalyst for undermining self-confidence. When you suffer doubt you feel unsure and start to second guess, and you become reluctant to step out of your comfort zone. A pit opens up that leads you to think the worst, see the worst and believe the worst is going to happen. What you focus on, you create and manifest in your life, so is it any wonder that you feel and experience the challenges you do?

Let’s talk about doubt for a moment. How do you act and feel when you are consumed by doubt?

Take a moment and think about how you act and feel when you are doubtful. Now do any of those feelings empower you? Do any of those feelings propel you closer to your goals and dreams? Do they bring out the best in you?

You have a choice on how you feel. Your state of mind, and how you want to feel, is controllable by you. In fact, it is one of the few things in this world over which you have total control, if you choose to. So how do you take back control and get
into flow?

You need to make some decisions. Life is about making decisions. All through this book I will ask you to make decisions. Now understand this: every decision you have ever made was right — for that time and that place with the knowledge you had at the time, it was right.

TAKE BACK CONTROL & GET INTO FLOW.

Two minutes later, two hours later, two weeks later, two months later or two years later, it might not have been the right decision. However, we don’t live in the future. We plan for the future but we don’t live there.

Make a decision, and if it is not the right one then make another. Get into the habit of making decisions if you want to make progress. As you can see on the scale on page 12, it is about making progress, because that is what leads each of us to certainty.

It is not about being perfect; it is about making progress. Too often people wait until everything is perfect before they start; this is just another form of procrastination. If you want to beat procrastination, stop thinking about finishing the task or reaching the goal, just focus on taking action that gets you started. A great friend of mine, Malcolm McLeod, says …

‘A good plan started today, is better than a perfect plan started tomorrow. Your goal is to get it going, then you can get it right!’

If procrastination eats away at your self-confidence, progress is the greatest enhancer of self-esteem and self-confidence. From action and confidence comes a greater sense of certainty. I don’t know about you, but I like certainty in my life. It’s about knowing where you want to go and knowing how to get there. How do you act and feel when you have certainty in your life?

What is true for you? Take a moment to think about how you act and feel when you are certain.

Wouldn’t you like to have those feelings more often and more consistently? These are feelings that put you into flow and keep you there, and they all come from taking action, taking little steps that edge you closer to your goal, your desired state of mind and the life you want to lead. I am not saying your life is going to be perfect, but you will like it more and you will like who you are!

HOW OFTEN ARE YOU CONSISTENTLY
INCONSISTENT?