Index
Abrams, Selah, 56, 97, 127–129, 137
Accidental Genius (Levy), 113
Acknowledgment of positive intentions, 100
Action
barriers to putting ideas into action, 46–47, 65–66
Engaged Listening and taking action, 78, 82, 85–86
Focused Conversations and taking action, 92–93, 95, 100
motivating others to take action, 116–117, 130–131, 141–142
taking action to influence others, 146–147
Adding value through Engaged Listening, 82
Advocacy for a position, 113–114
AEIOU model of communication, 100
Albright, Madeline, 15
Alessandra, Tony, 117
“All but dissertation” syndrome, 122–123
Allen, Barbara McFadden, 95
Allen, Woody, 58
Alternative scenarios, 60–61
Analysis paralysis, 66–67
“Arab spring,” 130
Arguments, floating of, 99
Asimov, Isaac, 109
Asking for help, 63–64
Asking questions. See Questions
Attention, gaining of, 9
Audiences, adapting messages to, 117, 142
Austin, Vicki, 138
Authenticity, 10, 99, 101–102, 111, 132, 140
Bad news, delivery of, 125
Barakat, Christie Ann, 131
Begley, Sharon, 37
Bell, Ron, 90
Blind-spot safety program case study, 33–35, 116
Blogging, 40–41, 131, 136, 137–138, 140
See also Social media
Bock, Wally, 40
Body, Engaged Listening and moving of, 81
Body language
Engaged Listening and, 73, 79, 83–84
Focused Conversation and, 101–102
overpreparation and missing of, 66–68
Bracketing distracting thoughts, 81
Brain, Taking Quiet Time and, 36
Brands, personal, 9
Breadth vs. depth, 13, 118–119
Breaks from work, 42
Breathing, 45
Brown, Sunni, 120
Burns, Ursula, 84
Burstyn, Ellen, 33
Carr, Gina, 136
Chats (online), 98
Chavis, Stacey, 128–129
Clarifying your own stance, 112–113
Clark, Dorie, 133
Cold calls, 138
Collins, Suzanne, 55–56
Communal solitude, 41
Communication. See Focused Conversations; Social media; Writing
Confidence, 30, 56–57, 68, 111, 116–117
Confounded problems, 104
Connections, personal, 55–56, 114, 125
Content producers, 134, 138–139, 140
Contrary opinions, 54
Conventional wisdom, challenges to, 111
Conversations
initiation of, 103
phone conversations, 81, 123–124, 125
unproductive, 86
via social media, 143
water-cooler conversations, 93, 115
See also Focused Conversations
Corporate culture, 7, 8–12, 85, 115
Criticism, 143
Data and written communication, 120–121
Decision-making process, speed of, 10–11
Deep listening, 84
Dembling, Sophia, 41, 63, 83, 94, 114
Depth vs. breadth, 13, 59, 118–119
Details in written communication, 119–120
“Device addiction,” 142–143
Devices, electronic, 42–43, 142–143
Digerati Award, 128
Distraction, avoidance of, 81
“Diving deep,” 59
Due diligence, 58–59
Education and social media, 135
Egyptian revolution (2011), 130
Electronic devices, 42–43
dangers of putting your position in writing, 124
as distraction, 42
inefficiency of, 123–125
introvert preference for, 13, 111
pausing before sending, 63, 119
See also Social media; Writing
Emotion in persuasive writing, 122
Empathy and Engaged Listening, 76–77, 85–86
Engaged Listening
benefits of, 73–78
exercises, 87–88
overpreparation and, 66–67
overuse of, 85–86
Quiet Influence Quotient and, 27
strategies for, 78–84
Engagement, building of, 78
Engagement with social media, 137–138
Ethos in persuasive writing, 122
Exercise, physical, 44
Exercises, mental, 57
Expertise, 53–54
Exposure through social media, 133
Expression of thoughts and feelings, 100
“Extrovert ideal,” 10
“Eyebrow test,” 101–102
Facebook, 128, 130, 132, 136–137
Face-to-face meetings, 79, 91, 97–98, 125, 131
Feedback, 30, 59, 75, 77, 82, 95, 125
Flexibility and authenticity, 99, 101–102
The flow, going with, 48, 60–61
Focus
in Engaged Listening, 81
information overload and, 141
loss of, 68–69
Focused Conversations
case study, 89–91
defined, 20
exercises, 105–107
overuse of, 102–105
purpose of, 92–96
Quiet Influence Quotient and, 27
in social media, 129–130
strategies for, 96–102
See also Conversations
Follow-up, 124
Free writing, 113
Freeman, Morgan, 76–77
Gates, Melinda, 74–75
Getting to Resolution: Turning Conflict into Collaboration (Levine), 73
Ghonim, Wael, 130
Giamanco, Barbara, 132, 135–136
Girl Talk mentoring program, 89–91, 101, 102
Goals and social media, 135–136
Going beyond words, 83–84
Going with the flow, 48, 60–61
Goldman Sachs, 115
Goldsmith, Oliver, 10
Goodman, Marian, 119
Grammar, 119–120
Greenberg, David, 63
Group think, 104–105
Handler, Jessica, 113, 119, 143
Help, asking for, 63–64
Holtzclaw, Elisha, 21
Hopkins, Wesley, 99
Horn, Sam, 101–102
“How” questions, 83
Howard, Justyn, 131
Humility, 9
Humor, 133
“I” vs. “we,” 56
Ideas
barriers to taking action on, 46–47, 64–67
for blogging, 140
idea boxes, 58
imprisoned ideas, 121–123
unheard ideas, 86
Identifying your proposal, 100
Ignored audiences of social media, 142
Inefficient communications, 123–124
Inflexibility, 48
Influence
in challenging conventional wisdom, 111
defined, 15
of thought leaders, 133
Influencing project plans, development of, 61
Information about yourself, 102
Information overload, 141–142
Innovation. See Creativity
Instructional videos, 134
Interviewing yourself mentally, 81
Introspection, 47
The Introverted Leader: Building on Your Quiet Strength (Kahnweiler), 69
Introverts and introversion. See Quiet Influence and Quiet Influencers
Introvert’s Corner (blog), 41
Invictus (film), 76–77
Involving others, 55–56
Irving, Julie, 33–35
Jacobson, Nina, 55–56
Jobs, Steve, 79
Johnson, Philip, 23
Journal writing, 44–45
Just Like Us: The True Story of Four Mexican Girls Coming of Age in America (Thorpe), 109–110
Kahnweiler, Jennifer B., 69
Khan, Salman/Khan Academy, 134, 135
Kilpatrick, Haley, 89–91, 101, 102
King, Stephen, 37–38
Kumar, Vinay, 37, 45, 75, 80, 116
Kuong, Cliff, 93
Learning
Engaged Listening and, 81
Focused Conversations and, 93–94
Preparation and, 53–54
social media and, 134, 135, 139
Learning your lines, 63
Levels of energy, 37–38
Levy, Mark, 113
Likely Asked Questions (LAQs), 60
Listening. See Engaged Listening
Logic in written communication, 120, 122
Logos in persuasive writing, 122
Loss of perspective and opportunities, 47–48
Lost connections, 67–68
Lunch, quiet time during, 41–42
Maeda, John, 97
Maintaining focus, 39–40
Managing yourself, 61–63
Marination of thoughts, 12
Meditation, 35
Mental preparation, 39–40
Mentoring for middle-school girls, 89–91, 101, 102
Mentoring on social media, 138
Microsoft, 43
Misunderstanding, 80
Mossberg, Walter, 79
See also Action
Moving your body and Engaged Listening, 81
Multitasking, 81
Napping, 45
Networking. See Social media
The New Handshake: Where Sales Meets Social Media (Giamanco), 132
New Leaders Council (NLC), 128
New Way of Working Program (Microsoft), 43
Nonverbal communication. See Body language
Open-ended questions, 74, 75, 98
Opinions
questions vs. recommendations and, 85
verbalization of, 86
Opportunities, lost, 47–48
Organizational culture, 7, 8–12, 85, 115
“Out of sight and out of mind” problem, 47–48
Outcomes, outlining benefits of, 100
Overpreparation, 64–68
Overuse
of Engaged Listening, 85–86
of Focused Conversations, 102–105
of Preparation, 64–68
of Taking Quiet Time, 46–48
of Writing, 121–125
“Pain points,” 75
Paraphrasing, 80
Participation in social media, 143
Passion, 21
Pathos in persuasive writing, 122
Patience, 20
Pausing, 63
Peer-coaching groups, 39–40
“People exhaustion,” 9
Perceptions of co-workers, 47–48
Perseverance, 20
Personal brands, 9
Personal connections, 55–56, 114, 125
Personal technology devices, 42–43, 142
Perspective
loss of, 47
taking another’s perspective, 117
Persuasive writing, 120–121, 122
Phone conversations, 81, 123–124, 125
Photos in written communication, 120
“Platinum rule,” 117–118
Polls, 98
Positive intentions, 100
Positive self-talk, 63
Preparation
case study, 51–53
defined, 19
exercises, 69–70
for Focused Conversations, 100, 145
maintaining focus and, 39–40
overuse of, 64–68
purpose of, 53–57
Quiet Influence Quotient and, 27
strategies for, 58–64
use of data and, 120–121
Presence (being present), 57–58, 84, 142–143
Press releases, 140
Privacy boundaries, 11, 13–14, 102–103, 132
Problem solving, 94–95, 104, 125
Producers of content, 134, 138–139, 140
Project plans, 61
Proposals, proving value of, 54–55
asking questions, 82–83
for initiating conversations, 103
open-ended questions, 74, 75, 98
opinions and recommendations vs., 85
question/answer writing for social media, 140
See also Engaged Listening; Focused Conversations
Quiet Influence and Quiet Influencers
characteristics of, 12–14
roadblocks to, 8–12
Six Strengths of, 18–21, 19f, 26–28
Quiet Influence Quotient (QIQ)
exercises, 30–31
QIQ quiz, 23–25
scoring and interpretation of, 25–28, 27–28t, 27f
use of QIQ, 28–30
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking (Cain), 10, 36–37
Quiet Time
case study, 33–35
defined, 19
exercises, 48–49
importance of, 35–36
obstacles to, 9
overuse of, 46–48
purpose of, 36–40
strategies for, 40–45
as strength of Quiet Influencers, 19
Ramsey-Coleman, Joyce, 97
Rapport with co-workers, 38–39
Readers, preferences of, 117–121
Recognition by the public, 133
Recognition of what is working, 29
Rehearsal, 63
Relationships with others, 11, 55–56, 131–132, 138, 142–143
Repetition, 99
Reputation, control over, 139, 141, 142
Research, 54–55
See also Preparation
Reservedness, 13
Rossbacher, Lisa, 130–131
Salespeople, introverts as, 29, 54–55, 75, 114, 120, 132, 136
“Sandwich technique,” 118
Scheduling quiet time, 40
Schwartz, Steven, 89
Search engine optimization (SEO), 140
Self, offering information about, 102
Self-confidence, 56–57
Self-interviewing, 59–60
Self-management, 63–64
Self-observation, 29–30, 44–45, 47
Self-promotion, 9
Self-talk, positive, 63
Self-understanding, 38–39
Serendipity, 97
Share This: How You Will Change the World with Social Networking (Zandt), 132
“Showing up,” 143
Shyness vs. introversion, 13
See also Quiet Time
Six Strengths of Quiet Influencers, 18–21, 19f, 26–28
“Sleeping on it” and written communication, 119
Smith, Greg, 115
Smith, Iain Duncan, 145
Social Media
case study, 127–129
effects on written communication style, 121
exercises, 143–144
importance of, 129–130
overuse of, 141–143
purposes of, 130–133
Quiet Influence Quotient and, 27
strategies for, 134–141
as strength of Quiet Influencers, 20
Social movements, 130
Software industry, 66
Solitude, 13, 36–37, 40, 41, 47
See also Quiet Time
Sounding board, serving as, 80, 82
Spangler, Steve, 143
Speed of decision-making, 10–11
Spelling, 119
Stances, clarification of, 112–113
Stimuli, reduction of, 43
Strategic planning, 59–60, 135–136
Streep, Meryl, 60–61
Strengthening your case, 99
Structure, creation of, 40
Style of writing, tailoring of to recipient, 118
Succinctness, 121
Support and Focused Conversations, 92–93
Sustaining energy, 37–38
Takers vs. givers, 132
Taking action. See Action
Taking Quiet Time. See Quiet Time
Talking
being talked over, 11–12
positive self-talk, 63–64
writing vs., 13
Talking points and questions, 60
“Teach Me Something I Don’t Know” strategy, 94
Teaching via social media, 134
Team focus in organizations, 8–9
Technology
effective use of, 42–43
listening to multiple viewpoints via, 79–80
videos as replacement for written communication, 120
See also Devices, electronic; Social media
Thinking
thinking first and talking later, 13
thinking space, 118
See also Quiet Time
Thoreau, Henry David, 71
Thorpe, Helen, 109–111
Thoughtful Use of Social Media. See Social Media
Time zones, 98
Tone of written communication, 117–118, 119
“Touchstone” companions, 57
Twitter, 40, 121, 128, 136, 139, 140
Typographical errors, 119
“Undersell syndrome,” 56
Understanding, 38–39, 74–76, 100
Underwood, Matt, 95–96
Unleashing creativity, 36–37
Unproductive conversations, 86
“Vibes” of conversation partners, 101
Videos as replacement for written communication, 120, 133, 134, 135, 139
Virtual meetings, 98
Visibility and social media, 133
Visual language, 120
Waiting to speak, 99
Water-cooler conversations, 93, 115
“We” vs. “I,” 56
Webinars, 79–80
Weil, Andrew, 141
“What” questions, 83
WIIFM (“What’s in it for me?”), 117, 121
See also Preparation
Wirtz, Jody, 17, 54–55, 60, 99
Words
going beyond, 83–84
limitations of, 105
Working environment, 42, 43, 96–97
See also Organizational culture
Writing
case study, 109–110
exercises, 125–126
importance of, 111–112
journal writing, 44–45
overuse of, 121–125
purpose of, 112–117
Quiet Influence Quotient and, 27
for social media, 138–139
strategies for, 117–121
as strength of introverts, 20
talking vs., 13
YouTube, 128, 134, 135, 139, 143
Zandt, Deanna, 132