EVERYONE IS A PROFESSIONAL

Perception is reality, correct? Unfortunately, these days many people believe that they are professionals. If they have a basic SLR kit, they are a pro. If they have ever attended another wedding, they are a pro. If someone has ever told them they take great photos, they are a pro. The list goes on and on. Why do I say this? Now more than ever, we must stand out as the true experts in the field of wedding photography.

A few years ago, we competed with anyone who owned a basic point-and-shoot camera. Now, we compete with every wedding attendee who has a camera built into their smart phone. What does this mean? It means that people used to attend weddings to enjoy the event. Now, people feel the need to feed their social media outlets and take photos of everything and everyone. In fact, at least in the United States, the first photos the couple sees of their wedding are most likely the photos taken by family and friends with their smart phones. Those folks have been snapping away the entire day, and they capture every moment from a variety of angles. And there is power in those numbers. With one hundred guests taking photos, putting them through filters to give them an arty look, posting them online immediately, and tagging everyone in the photo, we have a tough battle to win.

YOUR ATTITUDE IS AS IMPORTANT AS YOUR PHOTOGRAPHS

For the reasons mentioned above, the professional photographer must be perceived as a master of his or her craft. The people attending a wedding should feel as if you have a firm control over the proceedings so they can relax and enjoy the day. The photographer must photograph the wedding with a modest attitude, but at the same time, the photographer must be a leader who quickly earns people’s respect. If the guests believe you are a pushover when you try to arrange photos, they probably will not listen to you. Additionally, if you have not established a relationship with the wedding party and your behavior is too confident, or cocky, people will not only begin to ignore you, but most likely they won’t like the photographs you deliver later, regardless of how beautiful they may be. Nobody wants to like a photograph from a cocky, arrogant photographer.

It’s also difficult to be an experienced photographer and have your clients doubt your location choices during the coverage. But I try, at all costs, to make sure my clients are happy with their experience with me. If the bride or groom doesn’t like the location you chose for their photos, listen to them and take their concerns seriously. In such a case, finish your set quickly, and then move to the location requested by the bride and groom. Do not show any signs of being annoyed or irritated. Just go with the flow and keep your clients happy.

Just remember this: It is human nature for the wedding couple and guests to associate the experience they had with you with the photos you deliver. Even if the photos are beautiful, you can ruin the overall experience by being difficult to work with. The same association is true for surgeons. Arrogant surgeons—though they may be at the top of their field—are sued for malpractice at a much steeper rate than their less experienced but caring counterparts. I repeat: The experience you provide to your clients during their wedding has a direct correlation to how they feel about your photography.

HAVE A PLAN

One of the most effective methods to gain the respect of the wedding party, family, and friends is to have a basic plan before beginning to arrange people for a portrait photo. For example, if you are about to arrange a photo of the groomsmen, at least have a location chosen and an exact number of how many people will be in the shot. With this information, you can begin to visualize the shot and the arrangement of each of the groomsmen. You can always make small changes once people are in place, but at least you have a plan. Also, when taking any kind of portraits, you should remember that most guests don’t want you to take photos of them. They accept that it is part of the wedding process, but I’m sure they would rather be elsewhere enjoying the wedding. Therefore, being quick, effective, and confident is the key to obtaining their trust and cooperation.

During a wedding in Pasadena, I learned the value of having a plan, or at least pretending to have one, in the presence of the wedding party. I only had a few minutes to take photos of the bridesmaids. I asked them to stand together for a portrait. In the heat of the moment, my mind was thinking about how to get this photo finished quickly and move on to another variation of the group photo. Well, three of the bridesmaids began to look at the bride, wondering why I was not telling her where and how to pose. They were probably thinking that I didn’t know what I was doing. The energy changed against me, and I could feel them losing respect. In an effort to save face, I told the ladies to hold tight because I needed to change my lens and get a flash out of my bag. Basically, I was trying to convey that the reason I had not told them where to stand was because I was not yet ready to take the photo, not because I did not know what I was doing. Once I changed my lens and fired up my flash, I began to rearrange the group. The amusing thing about this situation was that my arrangement of the bridal party did not really improve the photo much at all. But because I was taking charge, they all felt good about me being the photographer. It was all in their heads. Remember, perception is reality.

FAMILIARIZE YOURSELF WITH THE TIMELINE

Despite the best efforts of the wedding coordinator, more often than not the wedding begins to run late from the very start. It is almost a guarantee that the make-up and hair stylists will be running behind. Way behind! At least, that has been my experience for over a decade. When this happens, people will turn to you and the wedding coordinator and expect that things will still get done to make it to the ceremony on time. That doesn’t change, but the time allotted to you to photograph them usually is compromised. I realize that not all weddings have a wedding coordinator, but it doesn’t matter. What matters is that you have an idea of the key parts of a wedding and when they will occur.

For example, when the bride and groom are getting ready, I let the bride know that we only have 15 minutes before we are supposed to meet the groom for the first look. A simple statement like this gives the bride the impression that, despite the chaos going on around the room, you are still keeping track of time and are trying to keep to the schedule. The bride’s perception of the photographer being in control improves matters considerably.

During my first years as a wedding photographer, I was under the impression that my only job was to take the wedding photos. But I learned quickly that taking the photographs is just one of the many jobs the wedding photographer is expected to perform. Early in my career, I remember telling many couples that the reason why I didn’t have a chance to photograph this or that was because the wedding was running so late that we simply ran out of time. That did not go well for me, believe me.

As I said before, you are expected to photograph all the sets the couple requests, whether you have time or not. It’s a good idea to carry the timeline in your pocket so you can reference it and demonstrate that you are on top of things.

BE DECISIVE

Because of your proximity to the couple, the wedding party, and the couple’s families, you will become their go-to person for anything related to the wedding. Many times, different people will ask you the same questions regarding photography. When asked a question about how or when you will photograph something, answer the questions in a decisive manner. Answers that include the phrases, “I’m not sure,” “Maybe,” or “I don’t know” do not instill confidence in anyone.

A few years ago, during a wedding in Orange County, California, I was asked by the wedding coordinator where I was going to do the first look of the bride and groom. At that time, I was busy photographing the last of the wedding party photos in the bride’s getting-ready room. Without thinking, I told the coordinator that I had no idea where I was going to take the couple to do the first look. The mother of the bride also heard me make that statement. A couple of minutes later, my second shooter told me that he overheard a conversation between the mother of the bride and the wedding coordinator. The mother asked her if I knew what I was doing. I couldn’t believe my ears! I was doing my job perfectly, and suddenly I had lost the respect of two very important people in the wedding. It took me half a day to gain their confidence back.

Now, having learned that lesson, even if I don’t yet know the location of the first look, I answer the question in such a way that people never doubt me. I’ll say, “In a couple of minutes, I’m going to go downstairs and choose a great location,” or “I noticed a beautiful private place by the lobby. I’m going to go check out how the light looks there at this time of day.” You don’t have to answer this way. These are just examples of how you could answer the question in a way that instills confidence in you and, again, shows that you have everything under control.

Be aware that I am sharing just a few stories that deal with important lessons learned. For every example I have written in this book, there are more than a hundred stories I have not included that involve similar problems and challenges. I am telling you my experiences because I wish someone had told me or warned me about how quickly things can get out of hand during a wedding.

In summary, people need to see you as a leader at the wedding, regardless of your style. You need to be perceived as someone who has complete command of his or her duties. As photographers, we don’t just take photos as we wish. To properly do our jobs, we must deal with so many personalities that it can make our heads spin. Psychology actually plays a more important role in wedding photography than the photographs themselves. Once you understand this, everything else will fall into place and make your job a great deal easier.