Back to Monday

Ginger strode into Sam’s office, ready for her one-on-one. “How’s it going, Ginger?” Sam greeted her.

“I’ve been managing myself,” Ginger declared. “I haven’t called Marketing idiots all week. I’m making progress!”

“Yep, I’ve noticed that—that’s great. I’ve also noticed some other things.

“Remember last Tuesday, when you were trying to understand what Marketing really wanted in the release meeting? I saw you roll your eyes, and clench your fists when the Marketing VP was talking. And I heard some loud sighs when the release date came up.”

“Oh, yeah. I did all of that. I was really frustrated,” Ginger admitted.

“I’m glad you’re aware of how your emotions translate into physical reactions. Here’s why it’s so important for you to manage how you show your frustration. When you sigh, roll your eyes, or clench your fists, you’re telegraphing your frustration. People interpret your frustration different ways. It’s okay to be frustrated. But say that you’re frustrated.

“When you say you’re frustrated,” Sam continued, “you can say you’re frustrated at the situation, not the person. But unless you tell them, people may think you’re mad at them, and they’ll be less likely to provide you information—information you need to know.”

“Oh, I didn’t realize I had that effect on people.”

“The higher you are in the organization, the more other people magnify your reactions. That’s why it’s so important to manage your emotions—not to do away with your emotions, you can’t do that—but manage how you express your emotions.”

Ginger sighed and then nodded. She realized she had more work to do.