Chapter 5
The Disaffected Boss
The Problem
Your boss has “checked out.” He’s there physically but not in spirit. He doesn’t meet regularly with your group or bother to fill any of you in on the critical decisions that senior management is wrestling with. So you’re often the last ones to hear about big initiatives and changes. He doesn’t fight for resources, raises, or promotions for your team—or seem to care about his people at all. If he’s given up on his career, fine, but he’s essentially giving up on yours, too. He’s practically invisible in the organization, and you’re at a loss for how to get anyone to notice your contributions so that you can advance.
Why It Happens
Some bosses become so consumed with lining up the Next Big Thing on their impressive rise to the top that they lose interest in their present roles. Others disengage as managers when they sense that their own futures are limited. Feeling embittered toward their companies, they may passive-aggressively refuse to manage and view that as payback for all the wrongs they’ve endured. They stop jockeying for budget dollars, perk allocations, new-hire slots, and so on—and quietly allow performance to fizzle out as a result.
It’s also common for a boss to start phoning it in near the end of his career. People burn out over time, especially in high-pressure roles. If that’s the case with your manager, he may no longer have the energy to care—and he’s probably just biding his time until he can leave to focus on his photography and gardening.
Whatever the reason, it’s probably not about you. It’s all about him.
What to Do About It
When your boss lacks drive and commitment, it can be hard to see the upside. But you may actually benefit from his disinterest. It gives you a chance to fill the void with your own good work. If he doesn’t seem to care about much of anything, then he’s not likely to mind if you find ways to step in and raise your own profile, as long as your efforts don’t make more work for him. Of course, you’re probably on your own to figure out what to do. Here are some guidelines.
Try speaking up
Sometimes bosses just need a little prompting, says Boston University management professor Kathy Kram. “I’ve seen managers and employees in my class who say, ‘I just wish my boss would meet with me more often, give me more feedback . . .’ I always pose the question ‘Have you asked for that?’ Very often, they haven’t.” Many bosses are oblivious to their employees’ needs, Kram points out, but respond well to reasonable, diplomatic requests, especially if they’re easy to grant.
STEPPING UP: JOHN’S STORY
WHAT HAPPENED:
In hindsight, I think I was hired because my boss had already checked out. He’d been in charge of a key division of a small private company for nearly two decades. I later learned that he’d asked the owner for equity and been denied. But the owner trusted and valued him, and my boss knew his job was safe. Essentially, he brought me in to do his job—or to make his job as easy as possible. I was hired as a number two. My boss, it soon became clear, didn’t work the same hours as the rest of us. He’d blame traffic patterns for coming in midmorning. And he’d spend a lot of days “working from home.” I didn’t really mind, for the most part. It made my job easy and fun. He stayed out of my way, and I ran the division.
WHAT I DID:
I just tried to make him look good whenever possible, knowing it would give the owner confidence that things were being run smoothly and make my boss trust me.
We happily bumped along like that for a few years, until the owner of the company decided to sell. Then my boss kicked back into gear. I think he wanted to impress prospective owners and possibly get that equity stake he’d longed for. Suddenly he became deeply involved and dithered over every decision. He second-guessed things I’d done for years that hadn’t bothered him before. I ended up feeling like I couldn’t quite get it right anymore with him. When the company was sold, he didn’t manage to impress the new ownership team. He resigned shortly thereafter. I stayed on long enough to find a decent new job, but I ultimately chose to leave, too.
DID JOHN GET IT RIGHT?
John was in a tough position, but he made the most of it. In some ways, he’d been given a dream job: He was the acting boss, without the bottom-line responsibility. He could learn, experiment, and develop without anyone breathing down his neck. But working for a disaffected boss isn’t really a long-term career strategy. Even if the company hadn’t changed hands, something else would have put an end to this unspoken agreement. His boss might have retired, or John may have decided he wanted the responsibility after all, not just the freedom.
Make delegation attractive
Volunteer to take on tasks your disengaged boss doesn’t enjoy, suggests Stewart Tubbs, former dean of the College of Business at Eastern Michigan University. You don’t want him to take offense or resent your ambition and energy—so how do you gently encourage him to delegate to you? Invite him to coffee or lunch, says Tubbs, and ask if you can do anything to lighten his workload, even on a trial basis. Say you’re eager to learn new skills. Frame it as a win-win—you want to help him out and grow in the process. Most bosses would welcome the opportunity to delegate to a willing taker, says Tubbs, especially if you promise to send completed projects or reports to him first so that he can decide with whom and how to share them.
Fill in the gaps
Show your boss that cultivating your talents will give the team more muscle—with little or no extra effort on his part. Offer to learn new technologies, for example, or to do first drafts of reports he’s responsible for. Have a good relationship with Manny in finance? Work with him to file the team’s expense reports so that your boss won’t have to. Sharpen the skills you know that he lacks; he might see it as a lifeboat.
Tubbs knew a young woman who got on her indifferent boss’s good side by creating outstanding PowerPoint presentations. Before long, he was asking for her help with all his slides, and eventually he invited her to do some of the presenting. Once other leaders in the company saw her skills in action, they started tapping her for presentations, too. When the company later went through a severe downsizing, she was one of the few people who still had a job, primarily because her boss had come to rely on her so much. The same principle can apply to spreadsheets, social media, and so on. You may need to offer your assistance several times before the timing is right, Tubbs advises. But sooner or later, your boss will be so busy, he’ll accept your offer. Do your best work when he asks you to step into the breach—you’ll increase your chances of scoring repeat opportunities.
Build your own network
You probably already realize how critical it is to build relationships with colleagues, since your boss isn’t doing that on behalf of your team. But he may actually be a good source of inspiration when you’re deciding which people to add to your network and how to reach out to them.
Here’s what communication and branding expert Dorie Clark suggests: “You might say something like ‘Look, I’m really committed to the company, really interested in expanding my knowledge and working my way toward a senior role in the marketing department. But I need some guidance on networking to make that happen. What advice would you give me?’” Your boss may surprise you with helpful ideas. Few people are so emotionally disengaged that they won’t respond to a flattering request like this. “But don’t just wait for the pearls of wisdom to drop,” Clark adds. “Ask specific questions: ‘If I want to develop strengths in X, which people do I need to talk to?’ ‘Who in the company really excels in that area?’”
Your boss may not go to bat for his team on a day-to-day basis, but if you engage him in a big-picture conversation about your development, he may be inclined to share contacts or ideas. It’s a low-effort way for him to give you meaningful help. Ask if he’ll introduce you to people he’s named or if he’ll keep an eye out for opportunities where you could gain more related experience, now that he knows your long-term plans.
Even if your boss can’t quite muster the motivation to make introductions, you’ll at least come away with a name or two. You can then create your own opportunities to meet or work with those people by volunteering for committees they work on, for example, and taking time to chat with them at lunch. Sometimes personal ties that start in cafeteria lines evolve into supportive professional relationships.
As you’re working on those internal relationships, you’ll want to cultivate external ones, too. Research shows that creating connections beyond your company is critical to building a robust network, says leadership expert Herminia Ibarra. That’s because they exponentially increase your awareness of job opportunities in other organizations and industries, your chances of being recruited, and your ability to find mentors and allies with whom you can safely discuss career hopes and challenges. Ask colleagues if they know people outside work with expertise or knowledge you’re trying to acquire—and if they do, don’t be afraid to ask for introductions.