Truth 10. Think you’re a great leader? Think again

The scene is so famous that all we have to do is mention the title of the movie to know exactly what we’re talking about: When Harry Met Sally. In case you’re not a moviegoer, there’s the setup. Harry and Sally are sitting in a New York diner comparing his perceived track record of excellent, um, performance against general demographic statistics that reflect an overall dissatisfaction among women. His point: Yes, but I’m different. Her point: Every man thinks he’s an exception to the statistics. And then she says, “You do the math.”

Workplace math is showing a similar disconnect between perception and reality. A study reported in late 2006 showed that 92 percent of managers say that they’re doing an “excellent” or “good” job managing employees. But only 67 percent of the employees agree. An additional 10 percent say that their bosses are doing a “poor” job. As Sally said, “You do the math.”

Workplace math is showing a similar disconnect between perception and reality.

In a separate survey that has been tracking employees’ overall esteem for their executive teams, there has been a noticeable decline in the employees’ respect and trust that their management is making decisions that will ultimately result in a healthy and competitive company. Only 49 percent of employees say that they have “trust and confidence” in their managers’ performance—down from 51 percent a few years earlier. Employees are also reporting less confidence that their managers are behaving and making choices that reflect the company’s core values.

Could you be a Harry, blissfully moving through your workdays assuming that all your employees are fulfilled and satisfied with their jobs? If you’re assuming that you can just tell that your employees are satisfied by the way they behave in front of you, you could be putting valuable relationships at risk.

There are ways you can close the perception/reality gap. If you’re fortunate, your company already administers 360-degree performance reviews, in which your own performance is being rated not only by your boss but also by your direct reports. As hard as it may be to stand under such bright scrutiny, swallow your pride, submit, and then pay very close attention to the feedback you get from everyone who works with you.

But even if your company doesn’t invest in such formal surveys, you can always do a little investigation of your own. You can go the direct route and ask your employees this excruciatingly humiliating question: Am I as good for you as I am for me? But don’t expect a straight answer. (It didn’t work for Harry, so it probably won’t work for you.)

Or you can keep a self-diagnostic test running consistently in the back of your mind as you move through the day:

• Do I make sure my employees know how their jobs are tied to the organization’s overall strategy?

• Do I make a point of keeping them informed on all news and changes affecting the company and their jobs as soon as possible?

• Do I get back to them immediately when they’re waiting for a decision from me that affects their own lives—such as vacation leave requests and promotions?

• Do all my actions reflect and support the company’s values?

• Do my behaviors set the example for the kind of healthy, collaborative culture I want to establish in my group?

• Do I keep their personal issues confidential?

• Do I speak positively about them to their coworkers?

• Do I pay attention to each of my employees individually, demonstrating to them that I care about their personal and professional development?

• Do I take all the necessary actions to show my employees—both as a group and as individuals—that I appreciate all that they are doing for our department and the company as a whole?

• Do I keep my promises to my employees?

Do my behaviors set the example for the kind of healthy, collaborative culture I want to establish in my group?

Statistics show that when employees quit their jobs, it’s most often because they are dissatisfied with their direct supervisors. While you can’t force an employee to stay with you, you can certainly give your employees every reason to want to stay.

Close the perception/reality gap about the quality of your own performance, and your employees won’t be tempted to look to other employers and say to themselves, “I’ll work where she’s working.”